Love Melts His Heart
by ber1719
Summary: Adelina is a young woman who has experienced her fair share of heart break. But nothing can prepare her for the day she meets Easy Company and a certain dark-eyed Lieutenant with a knack for invading her personal space. Speirs/OC & possible Winters/OC
1. Chapter 1

_It's really good to hear your voice saying my name_

_It sounds so sweet_

_Coming from the lips on an angel_

_Hearing those words it makes me weak_

_And I never wanna say goodbye_

_But girl you make it hard to be faithful_

_With the lips of an angel_

_~ "Lips of an Angel" by Hinder_

**Hi there. This is only my second BoB fic, so please be easy on me. Um, yeah, I just want to say that I love reviews. It really does encourage me to write and sometimes my readers give me fantastic ideas, so... Any feedback, advice, questions, are most appreciated and welcome. I guess that's about it. As you can see, this is a Speirs/OC, so I hope you enjoy.**

Adelina's POV

I'd never doubted my decision to work as a spy for the British military. Not once, until now. I lay in a bloodied pulp on the dew-stained grass. They'd found me out. The German unit I'd be working with had found out that I was a Brit disguised as a German field nurse. I'd been taken by one of the soldiers to the officers tent, where I'd had more than a few bones broken. After that, I recalled being dragged out of the tent and thrown on the ground. The group of soldiers, some men who I'd come to think of as friends, refused to stop kicking and punching me until I was sure that I would die at any moment.

I remembered the date all too well. June 6, 1944. When the unit was ordered to take up defensive positions all along Normandy, they'd had no choice but to bring me along, only to toss me in some ditch out of the way where I could die all alone.

I was still there in that ditch. Around me, I could hear the distant sounds of the war. Yelling, screaming, bombs, bullets squealing through the air. It was dark and I shifted slightly to try and sit up. A thousand needles seemed to stab me and I screamed without a moment's hesitation. I knew someone had heard me when I heard a voice call out a word.

"Flash!" My thoughts were scattering in all sorts of directions, but I managed to remember the correct reply to the code word.

"Thunder," I said, my voice nearly a whisper. I could hear someone rustling in the trees behind me. A man's hand wound around the back of my head while another shifted under my back. Carefully, they turned me over to inspect the damage. I bit my lip. I couldn't risk screaming again for fear of getting this man, who was trying to help me, killed.

"Oh my God," they muttered. One of their hands left me as they motioned to someone behind them still in the trees. More men came out and crouched down around me.

"Holy shit, Lieutenant. It's a woman."

"Good call, Cowboy," another soldier replied sarcastically.

"Please help me," I whispered, staring up into all of their faces. I had to get out of here and I didn't want any of them to die because they were trying to figure out what to do with me. "I don't care what you do with me. Shoot me, drag me under the trees. Just, please, don't leave me in this ditch to die." Tears sprang to my eyes and mixed with the blood already caked on my face. The Lieutenant shook his head and gripped my hand.

"We're not going to leave you. We're going to get you out of here," he assured me and I squeezed his hand gently. He looked up at his men.

"Alright, Lip, do you think you could carry her on your back?" I watched one of the men nod silently. The Lieutenant flashed him a small smile and turned his attention back to the rest of them.

"Sergeant Lipton is going to be handling her for the first thirty minutes. Then he'll switch out with Guarnere. We'll each take turns since we don't want anyone to get too tired. Always make sure that whoever is carrying her is in the middle," he explained. Everyone nodded and prepared to leave again. The Lieutenant helped place me on the Sergeant's back.

"Thank God you're light," he said with a short laugh as he got a tighter grip on my thighs. I tried to laugh, but it hurt my throat, so I stopped. We started walking, the others keeping pace with Lipton. I realized suddenly how exhausted I was and I soon fell asleep to the rhythm of their steps.

Winters POV

I led the men in the woods towards the rallying point. The forest around us was lightening significantly, though the sun was nowhere in sight. Smoke and clouds covered the sky overhead from horizon to horizon. I sighed and looked back at Lipton. He would never say so, but he looked tired. I made Guarnere switch out with him at that moment.

"Guarnere," I waved him over as I stopped the men and approached Lipton. The woman(we'd yet to find out her name) was sleeping soundly against his shoulder. I felt bad for waking her, but it had to be done. I jostled her shoulder and her eyes snapped open in a moment. I flashed an apologetic smile and she returned it weakly. I grabbed her arms and helped her slide off of Lipton. I held her up with Lip and, between the two of us, we helped her onto Guarnere.

"Jesus Christ, you are light," he whispered and she laughed, the sound stronger than it had been before.

"Yeah well, when you've been in the company of the Germans, you find that food can be hard to come by," she replied. We all tensed. Germans? She was in league with the enemy? I shook my head, trying to think rationally. She couldn't be German. Her accent identified her as a Brit. She seemed to sense that she'd said something wrong. Her smile fell and she stared at us all with wide eyes.

"Before you all decide to shoot me, I'm a Brit. I've been a spy in a German unit for the past year and a half posing as a field nurse," she explained. Everyone visibly relaxed and without saying anything, I took up the lead again.

It took us another two hours to hit our rallying point. When we got there, I ordered Malarkey, who was carrying her, to stay put while I found someone who would know what to do with her. At last, I found Major Strayer in a tent in the middle of town.

"Ah, Lieutenant Winters," he said, saluting me as I did the same to him.

"Major," I said with a nod, "I have something important I need to tell you."

"Alright, Lieutenant, get on with it."

"Well, you see, sir, on my way here, I found someone that may be of great help to us, sir. I, along with several men from the regiment, discovered a woman. She told us she was a spy working for the British government and that she'd been discovered by the men in the German unit she was assigned to. They beat her, sir, very badly. She needs medical attention before we do anything else with her." Major Strayer nodded thoughtfully at what I said.

"Alright, Lieutenant. Medical attention first. We can wait for the interrogations to begin." Winters nodded and saluted the Major before finding Malarkey.

Adelina's POV

"We're taking her to get medical attention before we do anything else, so follow me, Private Malarkey."

"Oh, I don't know, sir. I don't think I can take carrying this much weight much longer," Malarkey replied sarcastically. By now, I'd gained some of my strength back. So, I slapped his shoulder jokingly.

"You should know that it really hurts when you say things like that," I told him as I pretended to pout. Malarkey and Winters chuckled. Malarkey stopped suddenly when he saw a man walking toward us from the medical tent down the road. He stood almost six feet tall and had an aura about him that instantly intrigued me.

"Lieutenant Winters," he said as he saluted said officer. Winters returned the gesture.

"Lieutenant Speirs." Malarkey tensed up when Speirs turned his attention toward us. His eyes were two black orbs, cold in their indifference until they met my own. He seemed curious, and maybe even a little startled, about my bloody and haggered appearance. When I met his eyes, he was quick to hide his emotions. Winters followed his line of sight and smiled at me reassuringly.

"Lieutenant, we found a female POW on the way here," Winters said with a wink in my direction. I cracked a smile, though I wasn't sure anyone could tell through the blood I could feel was caked on my face. I expected Speirs to get the joke, but his dark eyes continued to bore into mine, burning with curiosity that he was unable to hide this time, while the rest of his face remained completely passive. My smile disappeared. Though I desperately wished to look away, I was finding it difficult to do so. Those eyes were enrapturing, filled with a certain sadness that couldn't be detected unless you had felt it yourself. Something flashed in his eyes, but he averted his gaze before I could see what it was. I sucked in a breath, not aware that I'd been holding it.

"Right, well, we've got to get her to the medical tent. Lieutenant Speirs," Winters said, noticing my breathlessness, saluting Speirs, and waving Malarkey forward before heading off down the road again. Malarkey tried to walk as fast as he could past Speirs. He saluted him hastily and brushed against him in his anxiousness. I felt my hand caress his uniform as we passed him. My heart jumped at the unexpected contact, but I didn't dare turn to look at him one last time.

_I'll probably never see him again, _I thought dejectedly as we got farther and farther away from him with every step.

Speirs' POV

I felt her hand brush against my uniform and felt an unfamiliar tingling sensation rise from my toes to my hair. Whatever the feeling was, I suppressed it as quickly as I could. I shook my shoulders and tried to turn around. As if by some invisible force, my feet were rooted to the ground. My eyes were glued to the back of her head. Her dark, auburn curls seemed just a part of the blood-covered uniform she was wearing. I found my curiosity piqued. It wasn't a feeling I was fond of. I knew that curiosity and women didn't mix well with me. Especially not now. I was a married man now. I tried to push the thoughts that clouded my head at that moment of my so-called marriage of convenience. Did I even love her? I couldn't honestly say yes to that. And I'm sure that she couldn't either. For the most part, it was a relationship consisting of nothing but good sex. Not even great sex. It didn't mean anything, so it was just a way for us both to relieve ourselves whenever we saw each other. I mean, I did enjoy her company. She did enough talking for both of us and I was content with just listening to her talk.

I shook my head, knowing that I couldn't afford the distractions this young woman was sure to present to me. I watched the last of her disappear into the tent and did an about-face to walk off in the opposite direction.

**I hope you like it. And I hope that I got Speirs' character down pat. I know it would be easy to portray him as this guy that doesn't really give a crap about this girl that's been bloodied up, but, as you can see, he already feels something for her. And about the whole marriage thing, yeah if you look up any bio on Lieutenant Ronald Speirs, you'll see that he was married to a British widow whose first husband was in the British Army and died in combat. But at the end of the war, the widow goes back to the first husband, whom it turns out, was only a POW. So, yeah, there's your lesson in background info for today. Please review to tell me how it is so far.**


	2. Chapter 2

_Wise men say only fools rush in_

_But I can't help falling in love with you_

_Shall I stay_

_Would it be a sin_

_If I can't help falling in love with you_

_~ "Can't Help Falling in Love with You" by Elvis Presley_

**Please note that I didn't really put as much research into this as I should have. The regiment names and everything are not in any way accurate. **

Adelina's POV

"Well, it seems like your injuries look worse than they actually are, Miss Jones," the nurse, who was attending me, explained. I nodded, feeling my body starting to shut down. Exhaustion and a bed, no matter how uncomfortable, I realized were not a good combination. I shifted slightly, and the pain shot through me like a white-hot blade, waking me up temporarily.

"When will I be free to go?" I asked her. She looked me over. They'd given me a nice, hot shower, which had cleaned off the blood. This nurse had figured out that my shoulder had been dislocated, both of my ankles had been twisted, and I'd had a fractured collarbone. Other than that, the only other thing wrong with me was the terrible bruises and scars from where the Germans had kicked and cut me with their bayonets. I had a particularly ugly-looking one extending from my shoulder to my jaw line.

"Well, honey, if it was up to me, you'd stay here a few days to recuperate," she told me, answering my question but avoiding telling me the entire truth. Her blond hair fell over her shoulder, hiding her eyes from me. I eyed her suspiciously.

"What do you mean? It's not up to you, my nurse, to decide when I get to leave?" I asked her, my temper rising slightly at not knowing what she was talking about. Something above my right shoulder caught her eye and I turned around in my seat. Standing in the tent entrance was Lieutenant Speirs from before. His eyes roved over the numerous wounded before landing on me. I could see one corner of his mouth twitch, almost as if he was going to smile. Then, he was abruptly serious again. I blushed furiously as he made his way toward my bed. I found myself shaking with anxiety. I didn't look away from him though. It was a blessing that I got to see him again, and I didn't want to waste a moment of it being ridiculous. His head inclined in my direction before he began to talk to my nurse.

"Afternoon, nurse. I was sent here to take Miss Jones to Major Strayer," he informed her. She placed a hand on her hip.

"Does he not comprehend the fact that this woman is obviously sleep-deprived and needs to rest to recover from the severe beating she received?" my nurse demanded of him angrily. Lieutenant Speirs looked affronted to say the least, and did not answer her question. I guessed that he probably would have reprimanded her for speaking to him like that. After all, he was an officer. He turned around, and with a tenderness I would not have thought he was capable of, he took my hand and helped me stand.

"Can you walk by yourself?" he asked me, his voice low and quiet in my ear. I tried to walk by myself, and my ankles gave out under me. I waited for the impact between my body and the ground, but someone's hands closed around my waist. My eyes shot open in surprise to find Speirs' face only inches from mine.

"Did you really think I would let you fall?" he asked with a slight smile playing on his lips. I blushed and shook my head without replying. I could have slapped myself. Here I was, in the middle of a war with a handsome man only inches away from me, and all I could do was blush! Speirs seemed to sense my awkwardness and stood up, bringing me with him. One of his arms was still wrapped around my waist and he threw my right arm around his neck.

"Is this uncomfortable?" he asked me, taking a few steps with me. I was leaning heavily on him, so the pain in my ankles was reduced to only a dull throbbing. I smiled.

"No, this is fine, thank you," I muttered. I couldn't explain it, but being in his arms, my body so close to his, felt nice. An overwhelming sense of security flooded my heart. This position was so natural somehow.

Speirs' POV

I could feel her warmth through my uniform. It was comforting somehow and I was instantly glad that I'd been the first person that Major Strayer had seen when he demanded that she be brought to him at once. I was trying not to look so pleased with our proximity, but I didn't know if I was completely succeeding.

"Is this uncomfortable?" I asked her as I took a couple of steps forward. I could feel the pressure on my side increase as she leaned on me even more. She smiled at me.

"No, this is fine, thank you," she told me in that quiet, angelic voice of hers. She shook her hair out of her face suddenly. A wave rolled across my nose, and I found my mouth watering. She smelled heavenly, like strawberries and a hint of jasmine. I bit my tongue to stop myself from complimenting her. I'd almost forgotten the promise I made to myself only hours before. I couldn't afford distractions. But, God, she was so near and didn't seem at all uncomfortable around me, unlike my wife. Any time that she was tired of talking or I was not in the mood for listening, the silences that hung between us were unbearable. I shook my head, trying to keep my mind from wandering. I was finding it difficult. This woman seemed to send my thoughts scattering.

"Alright," I said, both to her and to stop the thoughts swirling about my head, "If the pain is bad, just let me know."

"Okay," she replied. We walked silently to the tent that Major Strayer had told me to come with her. It amazed me that I still didn't know her name. I refrained from asking, thinking that she might believe I actually cared for her. I didn't dare admit to myself that I cared for her so much already. To my relief, we were at our destination in no time.

"Thank you, Lieutenant Speirs, for helping me," she thanked me as I paused for a moment. She drew away from me slightly to look up at my face. She blushed when she saw that I was already staring at her. "I mean, I realize you were ordered to bring me here. But, you didn't have to assist me in walking." She was babbling and blushing, staring down at her hands now. I realized that I made her nervous. Inside, I was fit to burst with elation, but my exterior remained the hard shell I'd learned to put on to hide my true feelings from others.

"It was no trouble at all," I told her. Her eyes widened at the frostiness in my voice. I knew that if I let myself be kind to her, it would only end up hurting us both in the end. I had to push her away before it was too late.

"Oh, well, I should be going then," she said, her eyes shooting up to mine furtively. I tried to keep my face passive. It seemed to work, because she left without another word.

I wanted to kick myself for hurting her feelings, but I walked away silently. No distractions.

Adelina's POV

"Oh well, I should be going then," I said. I could feel my cheeks turning red again as I stared up at him. The look on his face told me that he wanted nothing more than for me to leave him and never return. The coldness of his eyes stabbed through me through to my heart. Taking the hint that I was not wanted, I left him without another word and went into the tent.

"Ah, Adelina Jones, I take it?" a voice rang in my ears. My eyes focused on a man who was tall, yet sort of thick. He had brown-red hair and had clear, blue eyes. I smiled faintly in his direction as I took the seat that he pointed to across the desk from his own chair. He held his hand out to me for a moment before sitting down at last.

"Miss Jones, I am Major Strayer. I want to ask you a few questions before I figure out what to do with you," he said. I knew at once that this man was straightforward about everything. I smiled slightly.

"Of course, Major," I replied respectfully. He nodded and folded his hands on the desk.

"Now, I understand that you have been working as a spy for the British government?"

"Yes, sir."

"And who did you report to?"

"His name was Captain Kenneth Fields, Major. He was stationed in Paris the last time I spoke with him," I explained.

"I see. And is there anyone else that I may speak to regarding your position and mission?" I eyed him suspiciously. Thankfully, he was not looking at me. What did he want? Confirmation that I was indeed posing as a German field nurse to pass useful information to the British? Of course that's what he wanted.

"Of course, Major. Major Dobey of the British First Airborne. He's my commanding officer, sir," I told him. Major Strayer nodded in recognition as he wrote what I said down on a piece of paper.

"Alright, and before you leave, is there anything you could tell us about German outposts near here?" he wondered. I thought for a moment, fighting against the memories that threatened to overwhelm me as I began to recall what had happened to me before being beaten. I thought hard, and a conversation I'd been having with one of the officers from the German unit I'd been in came back to me.

"Sir, if I'm correct in my memory, I think that I could be of some use to you." Major Strayer's eyes lit up excitedly.

"Great, let's hear it."

"Sir, do you have a map of your position here?" I asked him hesitantly. To my delight, he found one on the top of the desk and unfolded it. He pointed out our position, and I looked long and hard at the map, trying to remember exactly where everything was.

"Okay, I think I've got it," I told him.

"There are some German .88s about 300 yards ahead in this field between us and Causeway two," I told him, pointing out everything as I went along, "Those machine gunners are firing on the men landing at Utah." I fumbled, at a loss for words to explain the positions of the machine gun nests.

"Do you have a piece of paper I could borrow, Major?" He did, and handed it to me along with a pencil. I licked the tip of the pencil and drew an L-shaped design on the page.

"Okay, there are two guns that I know about for sure, sir. Here and here," I said as I drew two large Xs on the side of the L lying vertically, "And if I'm correct, you should anticipate two others here and here." I drew two more Xs on the horizontal section of the L.

"And they've built trenches, Major, that give them access to the entire battery," I said as I drew the trenches as arrows for him. He stared at the map and then at me.

"Thank you, Miss Jones. You've done excellently," he said with a huge smile on his face. I grinned in response. He took up the paper I'd drawn on and the map.

"This sounds like a job for Easy Company. Would you like to go with me to tell Lieutenant Meehan?" I noted the pain in my ankles.

"No, thank you, Major. I think I should go back to the aid station and rest a bit," I said as I shook my head. He smiled.

"Of course," he replied, nodding as a signal that I could leave. I turned around and began to limp away.

"And thank you, Miss Jones. You've done a lot of good just now."

"It's my job," I told him simply and left. I felt somehow lost. Almost as if giving away that last small bit of information that I'd secured spying on the Germans made it official that I couldn't go back to that job. Chances were that I'd been reported by the unit as being a spy. So, I wouldn't ever be able to go back to doing that. I found that a small burden on my heart had been lifted. Many of those German men had become my friends, and it had been bothering me for a while that I was lying to all of them. It was nice, being myself with nothing to hold back. I sighed aloud and was startled when a voice asked me what was wrong. I recognized it at once, and turned toward the source of the noise eagerly. Though I knew that Lieutenant Speirs couldn't possibly like me at all, I had to admit that I had a little bit of a crush on him. He was ruggedly handsome and had a certain enigmatic aura about him that drew me in instantly.

"Lieutenant Speirs," I said, trying not to smile too widely. A strange look crossed his face. He looked down at his boots and then brought his eyes up again to mine.

Speirs' POV

I was walking out of town when I saw her again. I slowed down against my better judgment so that we would arrive at a point in the road at the same time. She seemed to be deep in thought, and I noticed that she was fidgeting with a button on her uniform. I smiled but was quick to cover it up. I had to be more careful with my feelings around her. Suddenly, she sighed, and I felt my heart swell with an emotion I couldn't identify.

"Are you alright?" I asked her before I could stop myself. She turned toward me in a flash. Her eyes seemed to widen slightly when she looked at me.

"Lieutenant Speirs," she said, the surprise in her voice evident. She was smiling, but seemed hesitant about something. I couldn't tell what and I found that my curiosity about her was intensifying. I realized I still didn't know her name, and I bit my tongue hard to keep my mouth from running away with me again.

"Miss Jones," I said with what I hoped was an indifferent tone. Maintaining my cold facade around her was proving to be a difficult task, and I hated the guilt that overwhelmed me for talking to her. I wished that I could be myself with her, but I knew myself. When I wanted something, I would follow any means to get it. And I wanted this girl more than I was willing to admit. So, I had to push her away by pretending to be completely unaffected by her.

"You're leaving town?" she asked me suddenly. My eyes focused on her again. With a jolt of my heart, I realized that she'd been thinking very hard about something at the same time that I was. She was very observant if she'd figured out the direction I was headed in. I looked down at the ground and then back at her. I clenched the packet of cigarettes in my hand.

_Did she smoke? Would she approve of me smoking?_

I held the pack out to her, and she shook her head with a smile.

"No, thank you, Lieutenant. I don't smoke," she told me.

"I don't either," I said, and could have smacked myself when I realized I was flirting with her. She bit her lip and giggled.

"Then why on Earth do you have an entire pack in your hand?" she asked of me. I smiled and shrugged. She wouldn't believe me even I told her. A minute passed before either of us said anything. The nurse bit her lip again. I couldn't begin to describe how distracting that movement was. I shook my head and smiled.

"I should be going," I told her. Before she could say anything, I started walking away. I couldn't stay in her presence any longer or I'd do something I'd regret. So, I did the only thing I could do: leave.

**Please write a review if you have the time. I know a few people reviewed last chapter and I'm sorry about not replying, but I've been really busy lately. That's why it took so long to get this chapter out. Anyway, thank you for reviewing and I hope you like this chapter too. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

_I'm a fool to want you_

_Pity me, I need you_

_I know it's wrong, it must be wrong_

_But right or wrong I can't get along_

_Without you_

_~ "I am a Fool to Want You" by Billie Holiday_

Adelina's POV

I watched after him, feeling a deep sense of unease course through me. He didn't want me. Of course, how could he? He was handsome and enigmatic while I was plain and clumsy. I shook my head. I'd gotten in too deep already. I'd only met him a few hours earlier.

I wondered what was wrong with me. I'd never really taken any interest in any men back home. So, why now? In the middle of war, where the kind of relationship I was fantasizing about was sure to end in ruin? Speirs disappeared from my line of sight and I exhaled a breath I hadn't known I was holding. I turned again toward the medical tent and walked up to it. I met the nurse from before and she placed me on the same bed.

"You can just rest here for a while. I'll come back to check on you in a bit," she told me kindly before she rushed away again. I felt so useless. I was a nurse! I'd experienced worse situations than this. Not physically, but mentally. And I'd discovered a long time ago that physical pains could be overcome through the exercise of intense concentration on an important task. I tried not to remember how I'd come across that fact of life, but the memories came anyway. My eyes closed and it was like I was right back there in that small second-story room.

_I was seventeen years old. I was in my room with my little sister wrapped in my arms. I placed my hands over the ones already on her ears. The sounds coming from downstairs only got louder and I wished that I could run away. But I wouldn't leave my sister and I was in no position to take care of her if I took her with me. I had no job. I had no purpose in the world besides keeping her safe. To try and block out the sounds, I tried singing a song. _

"_Somewhere over the rainbow_

_Way up high_

_There's a land that I've heard of _

_Once in a lullaby_

_Somewhere over the rainbow_

_Skies are blue_

_And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true."_

_I was suddenly interrupted when my father burst through the door. He looked livid. His eyes were clouded over: an effect of his excessive consumption of alcohol that I'd gotten used to over the years. His nostrils flared as he took in our position._

"_What are you doing, Adelina? What's wrong with your sister?" he asked me, his voice sending a chill down my spine. I gulped and shook my head, knowing that it was the wrong thing to do. I was tired of being bullied around and I refused to give in to him this time. I left Sarah, my younger sister, on the bed and I stood up. I was far enough away from my father so that he couldn't touch me. I made sure of it. _

"_I'm trying to protect her, just like every time you get drunk and start yelling at Mama for something," I told him boldly. "Don't you understand, Daddy? She doesn't want to see you like this, and neither do I." My eyes turned pleading. I could almost feel the marks on my back from the last time I'd tried to stand up to him. I gulped before continuing._

"_Please, daddy. Please stop this. We don't like seeing you like this. It's hurting all of us, most of all you." His hand raised and he took a step forward. The smack reverberated around the room and I sunk helplessly to the ground, clutching my cheek. He sneered and took the opportunity while I was down to go to the bed. He picked up my sister and held her close._

"_Don't worry, sweetheart. It will all be over soon," he assured her. I saw her nod as a few tears escaped down her cheek. He seemed to have forgotten about me as he started out the door. He had reached the front door when I had the sense to run after him._

"_No!" I screamed, trying to reach for my sister's hand, "Where are you taking her?" My heart was pounding in my chest and I was having trouble breathing. I saw that outside, in the car, my mother was already in the passenger seat. She looked at me pleadingly as if to say: "Just go along with what he says." I shook my head. I reached for my sister one last time before his fist collided with my head._

"_I will take my daughter wherever I damn well please!" he roared and slammed the door closed. I could feel the warm liquid pooling around my head as it hit the floor. _

"_No," I whispered, fighting against the blackness that threatened to swallow me whole. I heard the car start up and race away. With all the strength I could master, I pulled myself up on my hands and knees. Vertigo and dizziness swept over me, and I slumped back to the floor. My eyes closed and even as I struggled, I know the effort was fruitless. Dread and cold filled my very core as the darkness overcame me. _

I woke up later in a hospital. While I was there, my one and only friend, Lewis Harold, had come to tell me that my family had been killed in a car crash. When I'd finally been released from the hospital, I'd gone straight to the nearest nurses recruiting station, lied about my age, and signed up. I had been filled with so much self-hatred and disgust that I would do anything to try and redeem myself. Nursing wounded soldiers was the only way I could think to do that.

A soft voice called me back to reality all of a sudden.

"Miss Jones?" the nurse asked, taking a seat beside me and squeezing my arm. I woke from the trance and turned my eyes slowly on her. She looked truly and deeply concerned.

"Are you alright?" My eyebrows furrowed at the question. Was I alright? Would I ever be alright?

"Yes, I'm fine. I was just thinking," I replied vaguely. She nodded and let go of my arm.

"Would you like anything? I haven't got much, but we have water or some cornmeal in the back I'm sure we could spare." I shook my head, smiling all the while. I couldn't possibly stomach anything solid now.

"No food, but I'll gladly take some water," I told her. She left for a minute and came back with a canteen filled with the afore mentioned drink. I took it, thanking her profusely, and chugged down the canteen's entire contents in one breath. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.

"Thank you again," I told her, handing it back. She grinned.

"Would you like some more?" she asked, her eyebrow shooting upward. I shook my head and laughed.

"No, I'm just fine. I think I'll sleep for a bit." She nodded and left me alone. After what I'd just relived yet again, I welcomed the sleep that overcame me in that moment and gave me a peace for a few hours.

Speirs' POV

After returning to the town, I got the news that Easy Company had been ordered to make an assault on Bre Court Manor. I immediately sought out Major Strayer.

"Major, I think that Dog Company could assist in the assault taking place at Bre Court," I told him, eager to do some good and cutting straight to my point. Major Strayer glanced up at me in surprise.

"Lieutenant Speirs, if you can assemble some of your men to assist Easy Company, then you are welcome to." I felt my mouth pull up at one side and I quickly saluted him. I nearly ran toward the 20 or so men from Dog Company that had made it to the rallying point. Eight of my men volunteered to go.

"Alright, from what I've been told, they've probably been out there for a while. Hines, Brady, you go and get ammo. Lot's of it. Any spare ammo any of you have, bring it. I want you to bring nothing but that, your weapon, and any grenades you've got." Hines and Brady returned with the ammo and we set off.

As we came closer, the yells and sounds of firing that was war filled my ears. My pulse quickened and my legs couldn't seem to move fast enough. My men followed behind me. I could tell they were a little bit nervous. This was only the second time they'd been confronted with a real combat situation. I couldn't blame them for being a little bit scared. We ran until we met some of the guys. One of them, Plesha, turned to me.

"Lieutenant Speirs," he shouted in acknowledgment. I nodded in his direction. I asked him where Winters was and he pointed him out. He noticed the extra ammunition we had and grinned.

"Winters will be happy to see you guys," he told us before firing at a Kraut. I smiled.

"Low on ammo?"

"Yes, sir," he told me. I nodded and took off in the direction that Plesha had indicated. Finally, we found Winters. I scrambled into the trenches beside him.

"Winters! Plesha said you needed ammo," I explained. I looked out over the field to see the damage they'd already inflicted. They'd already taken three of the guns and disarmed them. I prepared to fire my weapon.

"Malarkey! As much as you can, everybody!" Winters shouted at the soldier and handed him some of the extra ammo. I shot my gun, but was left wholly unsatisfied. I had to get out there and do something.

"Mind if D Company takes a shot at the next gun?" I asked the Lieutenant beside me.

"All yours," he said after a second. My heart swelled fit to burst.

"Let's go Dog Company!" I yelled at my men, eager and willing to join the fight. I ran along the trench with my men behind me. I jumped out of the trench. Instinct told me that's what I should do. I knew it was crazy and when I looked behind me, the men that had followed had been killed. Suddenly, I didn't feel so eager. Men I'd known for two years had just been shot, because of me. Because of my enthusiasm to feel the thrill of being in on the action. I shook my head For the moment, I would have to forget that and complete my current objective. One of the Germans threw a grenade at me and I jumped out of the way just in time, losing my helmet in the process. I shot my gun at him and he fell. I shot the two others there and jumped down into the trench again. I turned back to where Winters was and waved at him to make sure he knew I'd gotten it. I stayed there until one of Easy Companies sergeants, Lipton, came over and disarmed the gun there.

"Winters said we're pulling out, sir!" he shouted at me. I nodded and we took off toward St. Marie Dumont after the rest of the guys. I could still sense the German bullets seeking me out. The adrenaline was coursing through my veins as I charged after Winters. I noticed that the other eight guys that had volunteered from D Company were all alive. I quickly ticked off names. Richards and Hines were the ones who hadn't made it. I swore inwardly and curses myself. They'd been good men and they had big families waiting for them back home. Richards had been engaged for Christ's sake and I'd gone and pulled that stupid stunt.

Guilt and remorse filled my very being and I was left feeling lost and afraid for the first time since I'd joined the army. I shook my head, determined to keep these feelings under control until I was alone.

**Sorry guys, this is a bit shorter than the last chapter. But I thought that would be a better ending than the one I had planned, so I cut it off. Anyway, I really hope that you liked it. If you have the time, then review. If you don't then tune in for the next chapter sometime later this week or next week. Thanks a million!!!! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

_I let you in, I let you in and you infected me_

_Can't get enough of you, can't get enough of you_

_I breathed you in, I breathed you in_

_And now I'm in too deep_

_~ "Contagious" by Trapt_

Adelina's POV

I woke up suddenly when someone began to scream. My nurses instincts kicked in and I jumped off the bed and over to the source of the noise without even thinking about it. The nurse I'd talked to before was already kneeling over the wounded man, trying to get him to calm down. Her head shot up when I asked her what I could do.

"Morphine, quick!" she replied as she quickly pointed to a table nearby that had a few spare surrets of morphine atop it. I rushed toward it and snatched one up.

"Where do you want it?"

"Right thigh." I nodded and stuck it in. The man's body went slack and a dazed sort of smile quickly unfurled on his lips. The nurse relaxed immediately and got to work. I watched as she unwrapped the bled-through bandage around her patient's midsection. Without saying anything, she handed me the used bandages and I went to the appropriate container and placed them inside. My stomach churned at the sight of all the blood and other unknown bodily fluids that coated the cloth inside, but I urged myself to shut the lid and not think about it. My hand moved from the container, and the top closed with a weak thud. When I returned, she was already re wrapping the wound. I got a glimpse of the large hole in the man's stomach, exposing his internal organs.

"What happened?" I asked her, horrified beyond imagination. For a moment, images of the men from the 506th that I'd met flashed in my mind in the same situation: Malarkey, Winters, Guarnere, Lipton, Speirs. My throat tightened significantly at the last name.

"Grenade," she told me simply. Her voice shocked me into focusing again. She finished the bandage and stood up again. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. My heart bled for the tortured expression I saw looking at me. I looked back at the man, my face most likely taking on the same appearance. The man's chest wasn't rising or falling anymore. He was still and I took her hand.

"I'm sorry," I told her and I meant it. Any soldier that died was heartbreaking for any nurse. She nodded silently and went to go sit down. I let her go and felt a sinking feeling penetrate my core. She looked up at me suddenly.

"Would you....I mean, could you..." she did not continue, but I thought I knew what she wanted to ask me. I nodded and smiled reassuringly.

"Of course. I don't mind. Take as long as you need to." The first real smile I'd seen from her crept over her mouth.

"Thank you," she said as two tears rolled down her cheeks.

"You're welcome." She laid down and closed her eyes. Sleep was the only comfort men and women over here were able to find. I smiled contentedly at the sight. A cry rent the air a moment later.

"Nurse Powell!" the voice called frantically. It was another nurse and from the look on her face, I could see that she was very green. Before rushing over to her, I glanced at the kind nurse's name tag. It confirmed my suspicions.

"Excuse me, but I'm taking over for Nurse Powell. What do you need?" I asked, switching disturbingly fast into nurse mode. She nodded and led me over to a man who was lying, wincing, on his stomach. I saw blood pooling on the rear of his Ods. He watched my eyes grow as wide as saucers and gave a little laugh.

"I'm flattered that you're admiring my back side, ma'am, but honestly, I'd love to get that patched up," he said, giving me a genial smile before wincing again. I clapped a hand over my mouth to stifle the giggles, but it didn't really work.

"I'm so sorry," I said, trying to compose myself as I stepped forward to look at him.

"Not a problem, ma'am." I looked at the wound thoroughly. It looked like the bullet was still there. I blushed slightly, but brushed it off quickly. I couldn't afford to be embarrassed. If I didn't get the bullet out soon, then I couldn't imagine the horrors that would await him in the very near future.

"Okay, Soldier, as much as I hate to tell you this, you're going to have to take off your pants," I told him hurriedly. As much as I tried, I couldn't help but flush at being so forward, even if it was only to save his life. A voice behind me surprised me.

"Jesus, Popeye, we sent you back here to get you fixed up, not hit on the nurses," a man I did not recognize approached us. A goofy smile lifted the corners of my lips. A grin lit up on my patient's face too.

"George Luz!" he exclaimed. George held out a hand to Popeye, who shook it with a grimace, as the action disturbed his wound. His visitor smiled apologetically.

"Sorry, buddy!" He then turned to me and shook my own hand.

"Thank you for taking care of him."

"It's my job," I told him, brushing off the comment humbly, "Which, by the way, I have yet to do since you came along." I smiled jokingly and hoped that he knew that. It seemed that he did as he stepped out of my way and prepared to watch whatever I was going to do.

"Alright, well, as I said, you'll have to drop your pants." Now it was Popeye's turn to blush. I giggled behind my hand. I moved to offer him a hand, but George was quicker. I turned away respectfully. I saw that my young help had not.

"Private," I said, regarding the single chevron on her sleeve, "Kindly go and help one of the other nurses. This should not take long." She stalked off, shooting daggers my way the entire time. I rolled my eyes and heard someone clear their throat behind me. I twirled around and looked pointedly at anything but my patient's very bare bottom. Instead, I looked at George Luz.

"Okay, George, since my help was unutterably incompetent-," I began to say but was interrupted by a chorus of whistles from the doorway of the makeshift hospital. They were cat calling at Popeye. I threw up my hands in exasperation.

"Oh for Pete's sake!" I exclaimed and drew the curtain around his bed before going to get the supplies myself.

"Hey! Wait a minute, we can't see him?" one of the soldiers asked of me. I shook my head with a slight smile.

"Sorry, boys, you'll have to set joke time for later," I told them impatiently. I rushed away into the supply room and grabbed a few bandages, a pair of tweezer-looking things, and a pan, as well as some alcohol and cotton balls. I jogged back to my patient and moved aside the curtains to put the supplies on the sterile bedside table.

"Now, I'm gonna have to pull down you're..." I motioned toward his rear. He nodded to show that he knew what I had to do.

"Please, just hurry up," he said, his voice obviously strained. I slapped my forehead.

"Morphine!"

"Yes, please, ma'am." I grabbed the extra morphine surrets that I'd had in my pocket. I pulled it out and put in his right thigh. He sighed and relaxed into the bed. If I didn't know any better, I would say that he was sleeping. I regarded George, who was still standing beside Popeye's bed. He looked worried and I smiled reassuringly at him.

"He'll be fine. I'm not saying his recovery will be a piece of cake, but he'll be alright soon." He nodded and pointed outside to where I could still hear the guys complaining audibly about being snapped at by a nurse. I nodded and was finally left alone with him. The voice faded into the distance after I heard George tell them that they could come back later. I smiled hurriedly and then set to work patching this poor man up.

Speirs' POV

I ran back with Lipton until my lungs were fit to burst. When we finally stopped, Lipton shifted uneasily on his own feet as he gained back his ability to breathe.

"Are you alright, Sir?" he asked me, as if he thought I might shoot him if he did. I smirked inside. I guess my reputation as a hard-ass in Dog Company had reached the ears of Easy. I nodded, but didn't say anything.

"Right, well I'm gonna go back to Easy, Sir," he told me, saluting. I returned the gesture and he walked as fast as he could from me. It reminded me a little of how that girl, Miss Jones, had walked away from me: awkward and as if she'd just been intimidated beyond speech. I cracked a smile, glad that I was finally alone. Then, I remembered what happened earlier with my men. To be positive, I looked around me before I sunk to the ground, gasping for air. I hadn't ordered them out of that trench with me, but it was still my fault that they'd been out there in the first place. Richard and Hines. I repeated their names over and over again in my mind. What would I tell their parents? How could I possibly write to their mothers, telling them that their sons had died courageously of their own actions when it was really my own selfish behavior that had done them in. My thoughts struck a nerve. I remembered a conversation I'd had with my wife almost a month ago. We had just made love when I realized that I needed to get away from her. One of those very frequent silences had settled between us and I was going crazy sitting there like that.

"_I've just remembered that I have some drilling to do down at the base, sweetheart," I said, cringing slightly as I used that form of endearment that I would much rather have bestowed on someone that I actually felt anything for. She nodded knowingly. I knew very well that she hated that it was me she was married to and not her late husband, she was just better at hiding the disdain she felt toward our situation. _

"_You don't have to lie to me, Ronald. Why can't you just enjoy your weekend pass like every other American in the 506th?" she asked me, though I knew full well that she would have me gone even if I didn't offer every time things became awkward between us. I shrugged, not able to lie to her anymore._

"_Well, even if we don't have drills, there's most likely something that needs to be done there." Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her visibly shake her head. _

"_Always trying to be a hero, Ronald. When will you realize that you have nothing to prove to anyone?" she asked me quietly. I rounded on her, spurred on by the bitterness in her voice._

"_What the hell does that mean?" Her eyes turned up at my tone and anger blazed within them._

"_You know perfectly well what I mean. You're always trying to prove yourself. Prove that you're a good soldier, a good man, a good husband. But you don't have to put up pretenses with me, Ronald. I know as well as you do that this marriage is only one of convenience in which we both share everything except an emotional connection. It was a mutual agreement when we got married." I just stared at her. After a moment, I gained back my focus and finished tying up my boots. I grabbed my uniform coat and left the house without saying another word to her._

Of course I knew she was right. It didn't change the fact that I'd gotten myself well in over my head with everything. My marriage, my enormous need to prove myself, everything. I shook my head for a second and then stood up as I heard two voices talking animatedly behind me.

"I'm serious. She just stands there as calm as anything and asked him to drop his pants."

"I don't believe you, George. I saw her earlier. There's no way she could be up walking let alone say that to anyone."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, in case you hadn't heard, she got the crap knocked out of her by a bunch of Krauts. She was kind of leery of all of us, even Winters." I turned around, knowing exactly who they were talking about. Their eyes widened in surprise. They saluted me quickly, which I did to them. They passed me without a word and didn't talk again until they were well out of sight. I continued to stare after them. She'd been physically harmed by the Germans? I forgot my promise to stay away from her. This woman was just too damn interesting for me to keep away. I set off immediately for the Aid Station that I'd gotten her from before. I could deal with the consequences of my actions later.

**So, did you like it or no? Please review. **

**Holy moly I just realized how long of a day this has been. This is all still D-Day pretty much and the morning after. WOW!!!! Well, believe me, I certainly didn't plan on it being that long. **

**Anyway, please tell me if this chapter was believable and everything. I didn't proofread it since I just wanted to get it out to you guys, but if you do find any mistakes, please PM me or something. Thanks very much! And tell me what you think of the preview.**

**Preview for next chapter: **

"Winters told me you were a German POW!" Speirs yelled at me, his voice full of anger. I couldn't understand it.

"Do you really think that I would have been placed in the hospital if I were a German? They would have had one of the medics check me over, patch me up, and then the higher-ups would have questioned me to death," I told him, my hands jumping to my hips. His chocolate-brown eyes cleared a little of their fury and he hesitantly took a step forward.

"Then who are you?" he asked, his voice quiet all of a sudden. It unnerved me and I stepped back to put some space between us in that cramped closet. My pulse drummed unevenly in my ears as I felt my back hit something solid.


	5. Chapter 5

_You've got it, you've got it_

_Some kind of magic_

_Hypnotic, hypnotic_

_You're leaving me breathless_

_I hate this, I hate this_

_~ "I Caught Myself" by Paramore_

Adelina's POV

I threw the scissors down on the bedside table smiling at myself proudly. I'd done the operation all by myself and wrapped a bandage around his wound all in under an hour.

"All done, Popeye," I said, preferring to use his nickname than his last name. I found that a lot of time, their nicknames seemed to breed a strange sense of comfort, more than their real names did anyway. Perhaps for a moment, they were able to feel a small sliver of normality that had once existed for them. Whatever the reason, I did it because it calmed them most of the time.

"So, was Malarkey lying to me when he told me about you?" Popeye asked me, shaking me from my own mind's wanderings. I shook my head to clear it and focused on his face.

"What did he tell you?" I asked suspiciously. He grinned.

"That you were a British nurse working as a spy in the German army?" he asked it as though for a confirmation. Sighing, I nodded. Popeye smiled and reached out to shake my hand.

"You're a dam-dang brave woman, ma'am," he said, correcting himself before he swore.

"And good at digging bullets out of men's bums apparently," I said, trying to lighten the mood. I didn't want to think about what I'd done before today, not now and not ever. Popeye nodded, seeming to sense my awkwardness.

"Yeah, thank you again for that. I know how unpleasant it must have been for you," he said, smiling sheepishly. My cheeks burned crimson. I'd been so caught up in my work that I'd almost completely forgotten where exactly my hands had been.

"I have to go. I'll be back in a few minutes," I told him as fast as I could and sped out from behind the curtains. I smacked into a group of soldiers who were grinning from ear to ear. A few of them appeared to be trying very hard not to laugh. My eyes widened in horror and I started to walk away from them.

"Can we see him now, ma'am?"

"He's all yours!" I managed to tell them as I rushed toward the sink at the back of the building. As I was passing by the supply room, my arm was grabbed and I was pulled into the now-dark room. Whoever it was shut the door and I panicked. I closed my eyes tight, thinking that one of the Germans had finally gotten hold of me to finish the job they'd started.

"Please don't. Kill me quickly," I pleaded silently. Then, light flooded the room and I was able to see properly who had dragged me into the small closet. My pulse did not slow down. If anything, when I took in Speirs' ragged appearance, it quickened. I backed away from him a few steps.

"Lieutenant Speirs," I said in acknowledgment. He didn't say anything, just stared at me with those dark, brooding eyes. We stared at one another until finally the silence got to be too much for me. I hated silence, it allowed my mind to wander and I couldn't afford that, not anymore.

"Is there any particular reason why you brought me into this cramped little closet, Sir?" I asked. My words seemed to spark something in him and he squirmed in obvious discomfort. I looked at him concernedly. I realized that he looked more worn than when I'd last seen him and then I recalled telling Major Strayer about the German guns nearby.

"You helped at Bre Court didn't you?" His eyes widened in alarm.

"How did you know about that?" I smiled slyly.

"I was the one who gave Major Strayer the information," I told him, almost proudly until he gave me a stern look. I shifted, feeling my cheeks burning.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked him, becoming all-too aware of the heat consuming us both the longer the door stayed shut. And was it me, or was he moving closer. I looked down at his feet, which were indeed coming toward me rather than the other way. It looked as if he were about to say something as his lips parted slightly. I stared at them, my pulse quickening.

"You gave Major Strayer the information about the German guns at Bre Court?" I nodded. He was so near that his smell was burning my nose, intoxicating me. I was slowly being suffocated in this small space, but I couldn't move. His eyes pinned my feet to the ground.

"You're a German?" he asked. The question floored me. Why would he think I was German? I would have thought my accent was quite plain to pinpoint, though I did have a little bit of a German accent since I'd lived there half of my life. I shook my head hurriedly.

"Winters told me you were a German POW!" Speirs stated, his voice full of anger and rising in volume. I couldn't understand it. I stared at him in amazement. He'd actually taken that seriously? I squared my shoulders defensively. I waggled a finger in his face as if to say, "Now look here."

"Do you really think that I would have been placed in the hospital if I were a German? They would have had one of the medics check me over, patch me up, and then the higher-ups would have questioned me to death," I told him, my hands jumping to my hips. His chocolate-brown eyes cleared a little of their fury and he hesitantly took another step toward me.

"If you're not a German, then who are you?" he asked, his voice quiet all of a sudden. It unnerved me and I stepped back to put some space between us in that cramped closet. My pulse drummed unevenly in my ears as I felt my back hit something solid. I started to hyperventilate as his hand came up to caress my cheek. I could feel his breath fanning across my face.

"W-what are you d-doing?" I asked, my eyes shutting involuntarily. I already knew the answer to my own question. He seemed to notice my response and he instantly stepped backwards. My eyes flew open in surprise and I just stared at him as he stuttered out an apology.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have...I have to go, I'm sorry," he muttered and then was out of the closet in a flash. My hands began to shake and I wrung them together. Why was I reacting that way? He might have been about to kiss me. I wouldn't even know since I had never been kissed. I covered my face in shame. I couldn't believe I'd been so ridiculous to assume what he would do. I sunk to the ground shakily, deciding right then that I would keep my feelings for Lieutenant Speirs under control from now on.

Speirs' POV

I entered the hospital and found that she was just leaving a patient. Hurriedly, I ran along the hallway that she'd been headed toward and hid in a closet. I heard her mumble something to a group of Easy men and then her footsteps as she came closer and closer to where I was. Seeing her pass by, I lunged forward and grabbed her arm. I relished the feeling of her soft skin against mine as I pulled her inside and towards me. I closed the door, shutting the light out of the room completely. My male instincts took over when I realized just how easy it would be to-.I cut my thoughts off there. I fumbled around, looking for the light in this room. I could hear her breathing coming more frequently and shallower. Finally, my fingers tightened around a string and I pulled on it. The light suddenly clicked on and I saw that her eyes were closed tightly, as though pleading silently for something to end. This interested me intensely and my hand moved toward her cheek. When her eyes snapped open and she said my name, I dropped my hand without her seeing what I'd been about to. I doubted that she would want some stranger touching her so intimately anyway. We stood there in silence, just staring at each other. I could see those remaining dregs of pain and fear in her eyes. I found myself unintentionally leaning forward to get a better look.

"Is there any particular reason why you brought me into this cramped little closet, Sir?" she asked me. I suddenly became extremely aware of how small the space between us was. I shifted guiltily, but did not answer her. Her eyes roved over me and I felt my cheeks heat up. God, I was blushing like a school girl

with a crush! No girl had ever made me resort to such an embarrassing state. It was lucky that my face was covered with paint and dirt that she wouldn't be able to see.

"You helped at Bre Court didn't you?" she asked me suddenly. I felt my eyes widen considerably.

"How did you know about that?" She smiled slyly and my heart jumped at the sight.

"I was the one who gave Major Strayer the information," she told me, obviously proud of herself. I gave her a stern look, suddenly remembering why I'd come here in the first place. I saw her face redden and I desperately tried to quell the feelings that were bubbling up in my chest. Being in this cramped space was taking a toll on my senses.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked me, breaking me from my fantasies. Beneath me, I felt my feet moving forward without my permission. As if in a strange trance, her eyes traveled down my body to where she could see my feet. She knew that I was coming forward and I saw her gulp.

"You gave Major Strayer the information about the German guns at Bre Court?" I repeated her earlier information. She nodded. The enchanting aroma surrounding her was burning my nose. It was all around me and filling me up with every breath I took. Then, something inside me snapped. There would be time to enjoy this moment, but I needed answers first.

"You're a German?" I asked her, wanting to procrastinate no longer. Her eyes widened considerably and her head tilted to the side in confusion. She shook her head hurriedly. I stood there for a moment, floored. Then, what the hell had Winters been talking about earlier?

"Winters told me that you were a German POW!" I stated, trying unsuccessfully to keep my voice down and the anger out of it. She stared at me, obviously startled by my outburst. She squared her shoulders defensively and took a step toward me, waggling a finger in front of me as if to say, "Now look here." It almost made me smile. I liked a girl with the ability to stand up for herself.

"Do you really think that I would have been placed in the hospital if I were a German? They would have had one of the medics check me over, patch me up, and then the higher-ups would have questioned me to death," she told me, her hands jumping to her hips. I looked at her for a moment, in slight amazement. I took a step toward her hesitantly.

"If you're not a German, then who are you?" I asked, my voice quiet all of a sudden. What I said seemed to unnerve her and she took a step backwards, her back hitting a wall. She looked so vulnerable backed into a corner like that. My hand reached out to stroke her cheek, reassuring her with my actions that I wasn't there to hurt her. We were so close now, I could hear her quick intakes of breath as if they were my own.

"W-what are you d-doing?" she asked, her eyes shutting involuntarily. I watched her eyes close and somehow got a little of my own senses back. I stepped away from her, wishing with all my might that I didn't have to. Her eyes flew open in surprise and I just stared at the ground as I stuttered out an apology.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have...I have to go, I'm sorry," I told her and stole out of the room. I leaned against the door for a moment and then left the hospital. What were these feelings building inside of me? I was the hard-ass Lieutenant from Dog Company who had no feelings except hatred towards Germans. I couldn't let myself fall for this girl. This fascinating breath of fresh air that I knew I would never ever find elsewhere. If I'd taken two seconds to be honest with myself, I would have realized that it was already too late for my feelings to run away with me. She'd hooked me and I was slowly finding that my being married did not matter so much to me anymore.

**Aw! Two chapters in one night! I know, you can say it, I'm amazing! No, in truth, the fourth chapter was already pretty much done when I started writing it. But I did do this chapter tonight, even though I am supposed to be writing an essay for my AP English class. Oh well, this was way more fun anyway. I hope you all liked this chapter. I did a little bit of proofreading for this one. I really just wanted to get it out to the readers. :) Please review if you get the chance.**


	6. Chapter 6

_I want you to want me_

_I need you to need me_

_I'd love you to love me_

_I'm begging you to beg me_

_~ "I Want You to Want Me" by Cheaptrick_

Adelina's POV

After he left, I felt a strange sense of loss. I knew I couldn't have him and yet, I had never wanted anyone more in my entire life. I scoffed at the ridiculous way in which I was acting and decided that I would have nothing more to do with Lieutenant Speirs. He was a distraction that I would not allow to interfere with my work. So, I set my face and left the supply room. Out where the beds were, I could hear loud laughing. Not wanting to interrupt, I poked my head around the corner and saw a handful of men standing and sitting around Popeye. They were all smiling and telling him something.

"Popeye, how the hell did you manage to get shot in the ass?" asked the man who I recognized as George Luz.

"Yeah, Popeye, what's the matter with you? You like pain?"

"I think you do, Popeye, you crazy son of a bitch."

"Yeah, you'd have to be crazy to get shot there. You won't be able to sit for a while."

"Alright guys!" I said, interrupting their ridicule session. They all watched me interestedly as I shamelessly checked Popeye's wound to make sure that the bandage hadn't been bled through. Well, I was shameless until I saw all of their eyebrows raise. One of them even started laughing. I felt my cheeks redden.

"Wow, Popeye, she's blushing! She must like you," Luz said with a snicker. I blushed further and spun on my heel. I looked up at Luz with a satisfied smile on my face.

"You're just jealous, George, because I'm not touching your ass!" I said. He stared at me in shock before grinning. The other guys laughed at us.

"Geez, Luz, you sure do know how to piss a girl off!"

"Shut up," Luz said, still smiling in my direction as I busied myself with filling out some paperwork for when Popeye would be sent to a base hospital. I smirked as I met Luz's eyes. Then I looked back down at Popeye, who seemed a little drowsy from getting shot and then talking to his friends. I set down the paperwork and folded my arms across my chest.

"Alright guys, I think my patient needs to rest before he leaves," I told them. Each of them smiled warmly at me and then at Popeye.

"Alright, Popeye, take care of that ass," one of them said. He was shorter than the others and had thick black hair.

"Will do Perco."

"Yeah, see you later Popeye, try and stay out of trouble," Luz told him and clapped him on the shoulder.

"Yeah and you stay of trouble too," he said, sending him a significant look and then glancing in my direction. I wondered what that was about. I stared after Luz, who grinned at me and then left with the man named Perco. There were two men left. One of them, the one with the soft blue eyes, was tall with brown hair and a nice smile. The other was shorter with brownish-red hair. He stuck his hand out for me to shake. I did and he grinned.

"Name's Harry. I'm one of the officers in Easy Company," he told me. His eyes glinted with mirth.

"Well, nice to meet you Harry. My name is Adelina Jones." His eyes widened slightly.

"Oh, you're the woman Winters was talking about?" he leaned forward, the volume of his voice dropping until he was almost whispering, "The spy?" I nodded conspiratorially and winked at the other man. He dropped his gaze, a faint tinge of red brushing across his cheeks. I quickly turned my attention back to Harry. He grinned at me and then looked back at Popeye.

"Okay, Wynn, get your ass better. No pun intended," he said with a boyish laugh. I rolled my eyes and shoved his arm.

"Okay, Lieutenant, let him rest. I think he's had enough ridicule for today, don't you?" He shook his head hurriedly but left anyway. I noticed that the other soldier hadn't left either.

"You too, Private!" I exclaimed, shooing him out.

"Are you shooing me?" he asked with a cocked eyebrow. I withheld the urge to smile at him again.

"Why, yes I am," I said sweetly. He held up his hand in mock surrender.

"Fine, I'll go. But only if you promise me a date," he said with a mischievous glint in his eyes. I snorted.

"Here? I don't think so," I told him with a grin.

"Well, not here obviously. We'll probably be pulling out tonight anyway. I mean when we get back to England."

"What makes you think I'm going back to England after this?" His eyes widened in surprise.

"Oh, you aren't?" I stared at him, unable to find anything to say. I didn't know what my fate would be.

"You know, I'm not sure actually," I told him honestly. I felt a sharp pang in my stomach. I realized I didn't want to leave these men. It felt like I was already a part of their tight-nit group, though I'd only met them a few hours ago.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine. I just...Do you know where Major Strayer is?" I asked him, knowing that I had to find out my fate at once.

"Major Strayer? Sure, I could take you there if you like," he told me with that smile of his. I nodded and took his offered arm.

"You'll be alright here, right Popeye?" I asked, turning my head slightly to look at my patient. I shook my head happily when I saw that he'd fallen asleep.

We made our way through the crowd milling around in front of the field hospital and started off down the road. My heart was pounding in my ears. I was terrified that we'd be seen by Lieutenant Speirs. I scolded myself internally. It's not as if anything was going on between us. So, why did I feel so guilty? Because I felt a connection with him? I shook my head and turned toward the Private walking beside me. I smiled at him, wondering why he hadn't told me his name yet. He glanced at me and smiled.

"What?" he asked, making me blush.

"I was just wondering why you haven't told me your name yet." Those striking blue orbs wavered slightly as he tried to keep from smiling.

"I don't plan on either." I looked at him in surprise.

"And why not? You know my name." He chuckled.

"I like to think you enjoy the mystery." He grinned innocently. I rolled my eyes.

"Do you do this with all the girls you like?"

"No, you're a first." I bit my lip, not sure if I wanted to get in too deep with this stranger. I blinked, deciding that I would take a different approach. Being a female had its advantages when you wanted information. I shuddered as invisible hands and lips made their way down my neck, on my arms, and up my thighs. I flinched, making my escort stop and look at me with concern etched on every inch of his face. His fingers tightened around my arms, obviously afraid that I might pass out. I leaned on him slightly and tried to slow my breathing.

"I'm sorry," I gasped. He shook his head, a smile playing on his lips once again.

"Don't be sorry. Are you alright?" I nodded shakily. He threaded his arm around my waist so that he could support me as I walked on wobbly legs.

"Is this alright?" he asked.

"Yes," I replied quietly. I was indescribably nervous around him all of a sudden.

"So, how about that name?" I asked, trying to steer my thoughts away from that particular subject.

"David Webster," he told me easily. I looked up at him in shock. That had been simple! He shrugged and chuckled.

"It looks to me like you're more of a mystery than my name could ever be," he whispered huskily in my ear. I shivered involuntarily. He had no idea. Up ahead, I could see Major Strayer talking with Lieutenant Winters, Lieutenant Welsh, and a few other men who I recognized but couldn't name. Webster walked up to them and saluted the group of men. Winters raised his eyebrows at the position of Webster's arm, making me shift my eyes to the ground.

"What is it?" Strayer snapped. He was obviously not in a good mood. I unconsciously leaned closer to Webster. I felt his arm tighten around me in response.

"Sir, I'd like to discuss something with you," I told him quietly. I peaked up at him and saw his eyes soften considerably.

"Alright. I have a feeling what you want to ask me." His eyes moved toward Webster and he nodded.

"Dismissed Private," he said. Webster saluted them one last time. He gave me a short smile, and then left. I wished he would have been able to stay. All of these officers were intimidating me.

"Now, what is it that you wanted, Nurse Jones?" Major Strayer asked me with a slight smile. I cleared my throat, searching for the right words.

"Well, Major, I was wondering what is going to happen to me after this?" I said at last. The Major nodded his head knowingly. He turned slowly toward Lieutenant Winters, who looked down at me with kind, blue eyes.

"We were just discussing that, Adelina, and we've decided that you will stay with Easy Company for now. At least until we can get you back to England," he told me. I stared at him in shock. I was going to stay with Easy? I couldn't believe it. Winters sent me a lopsided grin as Major Strayer shook his head a little.

"Are you going to say anything, Sergeant?" I blinked, then shut my mouth promptly.

"Thank you so much, Major. You don't know how much this means to me. I won't make you regret this, I assure you," I said. He smiled and then dismissed me. I turned around and saw George Luz sitting a ways away with a few other soldiers. I grinned and went over to talk to them, eager to share this exciting news with them.

**I'm sorry if the ending of this chapter was kinda stupid. I was on kind of a writer's block, but I trudged on just for you guys. I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while. I have had AP Exams to study for, so that's only one of my excuses. Anywho, I hope you guys like it. And if you have any suggestions to make this chapter better, then please tell me. Thanks! Also, idk if I got Webster's character down very well. Please tell me if I did. :)**

**Oh yeah, and before I get a flood of emails telling me that Adelina should be with Speirs and not Webster, let me explain. None of the guys have any idea that Adelina likes Speirs yet, so obviously, they're gonna be sweet talkin her a little. But, I assure you, this will eventually be a Speirs/OC romance. I just don't know when. HEHE.**


	7. Chapter 7

_I'm falling apart_

_I'm barely breathing_

_With a broken heart that's still bleeding_

_In the pain _

_There is healing_

_In your name I find meaning_

_~ "Broken" by Lifehouse_

**Okay, for future reference, if I don't start the chapter off by putting Adelina's POV or Speirs' POV, then all of the chapter will be from Adelina's perspective. And I know you guys have got to be missing Speirs. I know I am. So, I'll have a little bit of a surprise for you guys next chapter! HEHE, I love surprises. :) Plus I think we need a little break from Speirs. **

"Hey, guys!" I exclaimed happily as I took a seat between Luz and Webster. They both clapped me on the back.

"There's our favorite nurse," George said as he flipped around in his pocket for something. After a minute, he pulled out a cigarette. He looked around at all of the guys, who were staring at me as if to say, "Who the hell is she?". He glanced between me and the rest of his men.

"Er, guys, this is Adelina Jones," he explained to them. I saw all of their eyes widen and I wondered how fast news spread between the men of Easy Company. George seemed to sense my discomfort, because he threw an arm around my shoulder and started to make introductions.

"Adelina, this here's Johnny Martin," he said, pointing at the man right next to him. Martin gave me a small wave before he popped his cigarette back into his mouth.

"This is Frank Perconte. I think you already met him unofficially," Luz joked.

"Joe Liebgott, Shifty Powers, and Webster you already seem to know," Luz finished and leaned back slightly to relax. His arm left my shoulder so that he could put it behind his head.

"It's nice to meet you," I told them quietly, feeling somewhat insecure under their stares. Webster kindly deferred the attention away from me by turning to the guys and continuing an earlier discussion.

"So, I heard from Malarkey that old Bill Guarnere got himself into a little trouble with Lieutenant Winters." Liebgott nodded his head.

"Yeah, I heard that too. Said he just opened fire on some Germans without the command."

"Well, I'm sure we all would have done some crazy shit like that if we'd just been told that our brother was killed," Martin said and then got up to leave. The name Guarnere sounded so familiar. I thought about it for a minute before it finally clicked in my mind. He had been one of the men from before that had carried me here. I wondered when the whole German shooting thing had happened and how I could have slept through all that noise. I remembered what Martin had said about Bill losing his brother and I instantly felt sorry for him. I knew what it was like to lose a sibling, and it wasn't pretty.

"Where are you going?" Liebgott asked after him. Martin only waved a hand in reply. Liebgott glanced at me and shrugged his shoulders.

"Hey guys, why don't we go and grab something to eat? I'm starving and it's getting pretty late," George suggested. All of us shrugged our shoulders and George offered me a hand in standing up. I grasped it and he hauled me to my feet.

"So, what did you look so happy about before?" he asked me as he slung his rifle over his shoulder. I clapped a hand over my mouth.

"I can't tell."

"Why not?"

"If I told you I'd have to kill you," I explained to him. He shook his head and clapped me on the back.

"Fine. I'll let you keep your secret for now. But, I'll get it out of you eventually." I rolled my eyes, knowing that him getting information out of me was very unlikely.

"You tell him, Adelina. Show him who's boss," Liebgott said and ruffled my hair as he walked by. I rolled my eyes and continued off after him toward where I assumed would be the food. We wandered around for a while until Liebgott finally smelled something coming from the back of one of the trucks. He motioned us over and lifted the flap a little to peer inside.

"Hey guys! Mind if a couple of hungry people join you?"

"Sure, come on in. As long as you don't have any Germans with you," one of them joked.

"No Germans, but we got a pretty nurse out here," Liebgott said.

"How about we just let her in and you guys find some other suckers to mooch off of?" someone inside suggested with a laugh.

"I don't think so! We're hungry," George shouted.

"Alright, alright, hurry up!" I heard Guarnere say with a chuckle. Liebgott climbed in first, followed by Shifty. George followed after them and Webster helped me in before coming in himself. I looked around at all the men. I recognized Guarnere, Lipton, and Malarkey. I didn't know any of the other men there. I was sitting beside Guarnere, who suddenly looked my way and beamed. He nudged my arm.

"How have you been? I haven't seen you since this morning," he said with a wink. I smiled.

"Yeah, I was at the hospital for a while patching up Popeye's ass and then I went to go and talk to Strayer and Winters about something," I told him secretively. Bill squinted at me as the entire truck erupted into a chorus of laughter.

"What aren't you telling me?" I shook my head playfully and shut my mouth. Guarnere sighed and turned back to the rest of the guys, who watched us interestedly.

"Yeah, Adelina, what aren't you telling us?" George asked. I looked around at all the faces and decided to change the subject.

"Don't you Americans have any sense of mannerisms at all? You haven't even introduced to me to everyone yet." Guarnere rolled his eyes at my attempt, but decided to play along anyway.

"Oh, this here's Adelina Jones. We picked her up on the way here," Guarnere said. The Lieutenant nodded and held out his hand for me to shake.

"I'm Buck Compton," he explained and smiled when I took his hand.

"Nice to meet you."

"Yeah, and that's Joe Toye and Alex Penkala," Guarnere said, pointing at each of them. They waved a little.

"And you already know us, Adelina," Malarkey said with a huge grin on his face as he jerked his head slightly at Lipton, who smiled too. Guarnere shoved me to get my attention.

"Now that we've done introductions, you mind tellin' me what's up?" he asked. I tried to keep a straight face.

"Sorry, Bill, that information's classified. I guess you'll just see the next time Easy moves out," I said, knowing that he was smart enough to get it with my hint. I wasn't disappointed.

"You're coming with Easy?" he asked as his eyebrows shot up. I nodded and chuckled at his surprised expression.

"I take it you're surprised?"

"Hell yeah I'm surprised! I didn't expect Winters to let a woman come with us." My face fell a little.

"Well, I don't know how permanent it will be. Winters said that this is only temporary until they can get in touch with my unit in England," I explained to the group.

"Aw, you mean we don't get to keep you?" Malarkey asked with a fake pout. I tried to shrug playfully despite the pull of my heartstrings. Now that I was getting to talk to the Easy guys, I was growing more attached. When, not if, I was sent back to England, I would miss them terribly. Making friends with the Germans had been entirely different. I hadn't been able to really be myself around any of them, not like I could be with these American soldiers.

I was interrupted from my thoughts when someone opened up the flap beside me. I watched as Lieutenant Winters poked his head inside. He smiled up at me and then looked at the rest of the guys.

"Evening."

"Evening, sir," Guarnere said in greeting. Winters' nose wrinkled as he smelled the air.

"Did something die in here?"

"Yeah, Malarkey's ass," Joe Toye replied with a wink in my direction. I giggled, covering my mouth as Malarkey sent me a disgruntled look.

"Er, any word yet on Lieutenant Meehan, sir?" Winters' smile faded as he looked up at Buck.

"No, not yet." The men all looked at each other.

"Don't that make you our commanding officer, sir?" Winters glanced up at me and then at Guarnere.

"Yeah it does." Bill nodded in his direction. Joe Toye reached across Buck's leg to hand the wine bottle they were passing around to Winters.

"Sir?" he offered.

"Joe, the Lieutenant don't drink." I looked down at Winters, who winked at me before taking the bottle.

"It's been a day of firsts," he said before he took a swig. He hung his head a little as a look of disgust passed over his face. Bill tried to keep the smile from his face, but didn't fully succeed in doing so.

"Don't you think, Guarnere?" Bill nodded as something passed silently between them.

"Yes sir." Bill took the bottle, drank from it, and then passed it down the line to Lipton.

"Carry on," Winters told them softly as he made to leave. He pulled back at the last second.

"Oh, and Sergeant?" Bill turned his attention back to Winters.

"Sir?"

"I'm not a Quaker." With that he left and Bill immediately cracked up laughing. I looked around, my head buzzing with questions. Malarkey laughed at my expression.

"On the ship here, Bill was talking about Winters and said that he didn't want a Quaker to do his fighting for him," he said. I covered my mouth with my hand as I laughed along with the rest of them

"Yeah, my guess is he's probably a Mennonite," Bill said through his laughter.

"What's a Mennonite?" Toye asked. I rolled my eyes at them and moved the flap aside to get out of the truck. Buck caught me by the arm.

"Don't go too far, we're moving out in about thirty minutes." I nodded and jumped out of the truck.

"See you guys later," I said to them with a wave.

"Bye, doll face," they chorused. I laughed and closed the flap. I wandered around, weaving in and out of the groups of soldiers milling around in the street. Finally, I found a quiet alleyway to travel down. When I got to the end, my eyes widened in astonishment. In the distance, I could see bullets being shot into the air and the remnants of burning planes lighting the sky. I watched the bullets as they lifted off from the machine guns and glowed orange until they finally fell to the ground. I wondered how crazy it would have been a few years ago to think that I would be here watching this. A few years ago, I didn't even know if I would live through another day let alone months and years. Though my father had never hit me so hard that I couldn't stand, I never could get out of my mind the very real possibility that something would set him off and he'd hit me so hard that I went flying into a wall. I shuddered at the memory. It brought up the faces of my mother and my little sister too. I couldn't stand to think about them. Mostly because a part of me still regretted not doing anything to save them. If only I could have gotten them out of the car so that he would go off. Maybe now all of them would be alive. Maybe my father would have given up on drinking and become the wonderful man my mother had married.

I felt tears trailing down my cheeks. I wiped them away, feeling completely ridiculous. I hated when I got stressed, because that's when the memories got worse.

"Adelina?" came a soft voice behind me. I stood up quickly and turned to look at whoever had called my name. It was Webster.

"Lieutenant Winters told me to come find you. He says we'll be moving out in a few minutes," Webster informed me. I nodded and followed him out of the alleyway. Once we were on the street, I walked beside him. I saw that he was looking out of the corner of his eye at me. Clenching my jaw, I stared back at him.

"I'm going to be fine, if that's what you want to know. It's just been a stressful day is all. Stress brings up things I'd rather not think about now. So, if you could find some way to distract me, that would be great," I told him, raising an eyebrow as he looked over my shoulder and laughed. I whipped around and saw someone standing there that had me blushing. I planted my eyes firmly on the ground, adamant about not meeting his gaze. He cleared his throat and told Webster to leave us for a moment.

**Haha, so if you can figure out who wants to have some Adelina quality time again, please send it in so I can give you an Internet cookie. Lol, I know it's such an obvious answer, but you guys can humor me right? I know this is a quick update and I hope that my super fast writing didn't retract from the chapter itself. Please tell me how it is. **


	8. Chapter 8

_Somebody turn the lights on_

_Somebody tell me how long_

_All this darkness will surround you_

_Cause I'm burning for you_

_Burning like a candle_

_~ "Burning Like a Candle" by Wh__ite Tie Affair_

Speirs' POV

I told the young man accompanying Miss Jones to leave us for a moment. I tried to quell the burst of jealousy that simmered in my heart, but I couldn't. It was like a raging beast festering within me, waiting to be released and punish all those who dared to look at her.

These irrational responses took me by surprise. I had never been a jealous man when it came to women. Mostly because I had never gotten deeply involved with anyone before. Yet, here I was after only a day of knowing this woman, willing to strike out at any potential foes so that I could win her heart. I tried to get a grip on myself before I lost control completely. I stared at the ground, at a loss for what I should do now.

Warm fingers closed around my arm and I looked up, startled, to meet her warm gaze.

"Are you alright?" she asked me, her voice etched with concern. I was knocked breathless by the melodic sound of her voice and her twinkling eyes. I wondered what I would do now if I didn't have a wife waiting for me back in England. I didn't have an answer, and it troubled me.

"Lieutenant Speirs? Are you alright?" she repeated her earlier question. Dazed, I nodded.

"I'm alright." She shifted her eyes shyly to the ground and then met my gaze again.

"Is there something you wanted from me?" she asked innocently. The thoughts clouding my mind with the suggestibility of the statement had me gritting my teeth. There were plenty of things I wanted from her. The point was that she was completely off limits to me. The truth resounded in my head and I stepped away from her, suddenly very aware of what I was risking, knowing that I had to stop it before it got worse.

"Miss Jones-," I began, but was interrupted by a voice in the distance calling her name.

"Sergeant Jones!" an NCO from Easy company approached us and glared at her. He saluted me and then grabbed her arm. I felt my anger escalate when I saw the way he grabbed her. It seemed so familiar and she didn't try to fight him off. In fact, she smiled at him apologetically.

"Excuse us, Lieutenant. We're moving out and Lieutenant Winters wants Easy Company ready to leave," he explained. I stared at him in shock. She was moving out with the regiment? It couldn't be. Who the hell gave that order?

"I'm sorry. I have to go," I dimly registered her sweet voice before she was whisked away once again. I watched them go with a renewed bout of fear and anxiety. I was not a religious man, but in that moment, I prayed to God to keep her safe.

Adelina's POV

**June 8, 1944**

**Normandy, France**

"Adelina!" Luz called me over with a wave of his hand. I had been leaning against the wall of a building, my eyes closed, and my mind almost completely shut off from the world. I hadn't slept in two days and I was utterly exhausted.

"Leave me alone, George!" I shouted back, irritated with him but feeling a strange sense of belonging as more of the guys called me over.

"Come on, we're in the middle of a war, this ain't no time to be lazy!" Guarnere teased me. That got my attention, which I'm sure was his intention. I jumped up and made my way over to them. I jabbed a finger in Guarnere's chest.

"If anyone deserves to be lazy, it's me, Gonorrhea," I said, using his least favorite nickname as payback for getting me up. He stared at me like I'd punched him in the face. It brought a chorus of laughter from the group and a few hands clapped my back.

"Well done, Adelina," Luz said and I glared at him next.

"Don't try and suck up to me now, Luz. It won't work," I told him. I sighed, my irritation ebbing away. I elbowed Luz.

"What did you want anyway?" I asked. He glanced guiltily up at me and pulled a cigarette from behind his ear.

"Got a light?" he asked sheepishly.

"Yeah, hang on," I sighed and dug through my pockets and pulling out a silver lighter. I thanked Winters in my mind once again for finding a pair of ODs for me to wear. I clicked it once, the flame shooting up like a rocket. I held it to the cigarette laying limply between Luz's lips. That's when something over his left shoulder caught my attention.

"Oh my..." I muttered, the lighter falling from my hands. Luckily, about five men stooped to catch it before it fell to the ground. I found myself frozen in the intensity of the gaze that held me captive. As the guys stood up again, they followed my line of sight and grinned amongst themselves. Luz elbowed me, trying to get my attention.

"What, George?" I mumbled, not taking my eyes off of Lieutenant Speirs. I hadn't seen him in two days, but it felt like a century since I'd been pulled unceremoniously away from him. I could still feel my fingers ghosting over his arm as I searched desperately for some way to comfort him.

"Are you gonna look at me or do I suddenly have to look like Lieutenant Speirs to get your attention?" I realized he was teasing, but the comment had me bowing my head to the ground nonetheless. The heat rose in my cheeks and I was speechless. The other guys burst into laughter.

"Oh my God! Our Adelina Jones has taken a liking to the infamous Ronald Speirs?" My head snapped up and I glowered at them.

"First off, that's none of your business. Second, could you try _not _to tell everyone about my love life?"

"Oh, so there is something there?" Guarnere teased. I stared at them open-mouthed. I had no clue what to say to them. I stole a glance towards Speirs only to realized he wasn't there anymore. I sighed heavily, knowing that a lot of questions were about to be directed towards me by the rest of the men.

"So, mind sharing some details, sweetheart?" Luz nudged me, getting my attention once again. I shook my head.

"There's nothing to tell. I like him but I don't think he likes me," I explained once I figured out I wasn't getting out of this no matter what I did. Liebgott scoffed.

"Any guy would be crazy not to like you." A chorus of agreement rang through my ears, making me blush anew.

"Thanks," I muttered.

"Just be careful around him, alright?" Malarkey said, his voice full of a hesitation and wariness I could not understand.

"What do you mean, Don?"

"It's just... I just don't trust him is all."

"Why don't you trust him?" I looked around at the group of men surrounding me, silently demanding an explanation. All of them were avoiding my eyes.

"It's nothing. Just be careful, okay?" I crossed my hands over my chest, not liking that they were obviously keeping something from me.

"Alright, that answer is good enough for now. But I'll want answers eventually," I told them and walked away just as Lieutenant Welsh called out to us.

"Let's go, First Platoon!" One of the NCOs repeated Welsh's command.

"Easy's moving out, on your feet!" Harry shouted over the tumult of noise that had risen amongst the guys. I sidled up toward him before the others. He motioned me over. He smiled when I came up to him and threw an arm casually around my shoulder.

"We're moving out, Lieutenant?" He nodded and then let his hand fall to his side again. The rest of the Company had come over and it was time for him to act like a leader. He clutched his helmet under his arm.

"Listen up, gentlemen! I want light and noise discipline from now on. That means no talking, no smoking, and no playing grab ass with the man in front of ya, Luz!" He turned around and winked at me, "Or woman." I grinned, crossing my hands in front of me.

"So where are we headed to, sir?" one soldier asked as he came closer to us.

"We're taking Carentan," Harry explained. I repeated the name in my head, wondering why it sounded so familiar. Finally it clicked, and I wished it hadn't. I'd heard the name countless times over the last week when the officers would invite me to play cards.

Carentan was an important post controlled by the Germans. It was a port city where four major highways and a railway joined together. They weren't going to give it up easily. My heart ached for the trouble I knew certainly laid ahead for the Company.

"That sounds like fun."

_If only they knew, _I thought grimly.

"It's the only place where armor from Omaha and Utah can link up and head inland. Not to mention its a major crossroads. Til we take Carentan, those boys are stuck on the sand," he told us. I tried to keep my sudden fear to a minimum. My only comfort was knowing that I would be there to help Spina and Roe tend to anyone who got hurt. I didn't know all of the men of Easy, but I knew enough that the odds of one of my friends being hit was very high. My eyes turned restlessly over the sea of faces. Guarnere, Malarkey, Liebgott, Webster, Luz, Perconte, McClung, Welsh, Winters, Buck....My head was reeling by the time Harry spoke again.

"General Taylor's sending the whole division." I watched Luz snicker.

"Remember boys," he said, imitating General Taylor's voice, "Give me three days and three nights of hard fighting, and you will be relieved." A chorus of "yeahs" filled the air as they prepared to leave. Hoobler came forward, headed towards the front of the group.

"Lieutenant, I'll take point."

"Corporal Hoobler will be lead scout," he said, bending down to retrieve his weapon. He gripped it in his hand and stood up. "Blithe, glad to have you back." I looked over at a man with blond hair and blue eyes.

"Thank you, sir."

"First Platoon, fall in behind Fox Company. Second and Third Platoon, follow us," he ordered in a loud voice. He turned back to me and motioned me forward.

"Hey, Dick wanted me to tell you that he wants you to stay by me until we meet up with him in a bit. My guess is that he wants to tell you where he wants you when we get up close and personal with the Krauts."

"Yeah I'm sure he wants me in the back where nothing good ever happens," I pretended to pout. I knew that was exactly where Dick would want me. That way, none of the guys would have to worry about killing Germans and trying to keep me safe at the same time." Welsh laughed and watched the trickle of men that followed Hoobler.

"Another thing to remember, boys. Flies spread disease, so keep yours closed," Luz told the guys, who erupted in laughter.

"Yeah, please do guys!" I shouted at them. They laughed harder at that and I fell into step beside George as we all headed out.

**June 8, 1944**

**On the way to Carentan**

All I could see was a line of tanks. They were burning, sending ominous shadows racing across the faces of the men around me. In the distance, I could hear the sound of gunfire. On instinct, I gripped the hand of the man next to me, completely forgetting who it was. I blushed suddenly as my eyes found their way to the blue eyes of Easy's commanding officer. The fire glinted in them as he smiled down at me. I looked down at the ground, not sure whether he would keep a hold of my hand or not.

"It's alright, Adelina. Between Nix and I, you're more than safe," he said with a chuckle. Nixon laughed beside us.

"Yeah, except I don't think you'll want a Quaker protecting you," Nixon said. I giggled, remembering what happened two nights ago between Winters and Guarnere. Dick glared over my head at his best friend.

"Shut it, Nix, or you'll never see the inside of my foot locker again," he said with a smirk on his face. It shut Nixon up at once. I knew that Dick was only half-joking. Nixon always had a case of Vat 69 in Dick's foot-locker. It was common knowledge that Lewis Nixon had a drinking problem. It was also common knowledge that Dick was more than concerned about it.

Up ahead of us, I saw someone running toward us. I heard him asking random men if they'd seen Lieutenant Winters. Finally he found us. He saluted Lieutenant Winters, his chest heaving from running from the front of the line to the back of it.

"What is it, Private?"

"Lieutenant Welsh says to hold up the men, sir. We lost F Company," Private Perconte told Winters as soon as he got his breath back. Winters nodded.

"Thank you, Private." With that, he took off in the direction of the front of the line where Welsh was. Nixon and I followed him without question. We could tell that he was a little bit ticked. It was the second time that we had lost track of F Company and Winters was getting irritated. On our way, when we passed, the guys would yell out to me. I would always shake my head and wave at them.

I couldn't describe how those little gestures made me feel. I felt like I was finally a part of something. Something important, something that I would never ever forget, something it wasn't likely I would ever find again. Even as a child, I had never really belonged anywhere. I had always leaned more toward mud fights than playing with dolls. And because of the way we were raised, boys shunned me from their games and I didn't bother trying to get along with other little girls. The only friend I'd ever had was gone from this world. My little sister.

The backs of my eyes burned with the sudden memory of her face. It was like I'd been transported through time and I was back in the front entryway of the place I'd called home for seventeen years. I was staring back into those bright blue eyes as tiny droplets plummeted to the ground. I shook my head, knowing that it was not the time to get caught up in memories.

"Did you send somebody?" I heard Winters saying. His voice, successfully masking his anger, pulled me from my own personal hell and reminded me that I was here for a reason.

"Yeah, I got Hoobler and Blithe out there now," Welsh replied, his voice full of irritation. I glanced between the three men. Winters was checking his watch.

"Why are we stopped?"

"This is about officers crapping out on their training, Nix," Winters said, then sighed, "Come on, let's get this show on the road." Welsh nodded slightly and then returned to the men to tell them to move up.

We watched them go before Winters shook his head.

"This is not why I joined the Paratroops," he said before walking forward and disappearing into the line of trees. Nixon looked back at me before following after his friend. I didn't want to be alone again so I ran into the trees. We pushed aside tree branches and tried to keep our balance as we tripped over numerous bodies and roots popping up from the ground. At last, we found our way into a small open break in the trees. Being that I was smaller, I got in front of Nixon just before we emerged into the clearing.

I heard a sharp intake of breath before I emerged behind Dick.

"He's dead, Private." The man in question whipped around to face us, his rifle coming to a halt on Dick. I recognized him as Private blithe from First Platoon. He looked scared out of his mind. I looked beyond him toward the dead German soldier propped up against a tree. No wonder. The man really did look like he was alive.

"Did you find Fox Company?" Winters inquired as he approached him.

"Yes sir," blithe said, his voice low and filled with relief. Blithe's eyes moved past Winters to me. He looked at me and I could see a certain reluctance pass over his face. He turned around slowly and pointed at the motionless specter.

"I thought he...I thought he had me," he said, walking closer to the German. Nixon walked past Dick a little ways and stood a little off to the side. I followed after him and looked closely at the body.

"Fallschirmjäger," I stated at the same time as Nix.

"Paratrooper," blithe muttered. Nix turned back to Winters.

"Division thinks there's a regiment of them holding Carentan."

"Yeah, that sounds about right," I concurred.

"Well that's one less to worry about," Winters replied.

"Yeah." I watched as Blithe's hand reached out and touched the collar of the soldier's uniform. A small white flower was pinned to it.

"That's Edelweiss. That only grows in the Alps above the tree line, which means he climbed up there to get it. It's supposed to be the mark of a true soldier." I looked over at blithe and saw his eyes fill with a sort of hunger. I knew it all too well. The thirst to prove yourself. It's what I felt when I first signed up to join the British Army as a nurse. I still felt and I wondered if I would ever get the chance to complete my goal. Then, I asked myself why I needed to prove myself. I couldn't think of an answer.

**Kind of a stupid ending, but I really wanted to end this chapter and couldn't really think of a way to do that without some reflecting from Adelina. So, if anyone wants to take a stab at why she needs to prove herself, then by all means, send in your thoughts. I'm still trying to figure it out myself so any feedback will be welcome. Thanks a lot you guys for reviewing and adding me on alerts and favorites. I can't tell you how much I appreciate it. And never fear, you will Speirs next chapter. :) **

**Oh yeah! And if you want, you can also guess who grabbed Adelina in the beginning. **


	9. Chapter 9

_So please, please, please go_

_I'm not strong enough to say no_

_Please, please don't stay_

_I'm not man enough to walk away_

_Please, please pass by_

_I can't resist you even though I try_

_~ "I'm Not Strong Enough to Say No" by BlackHawk_

**Okay guys I'm gonna be pulling stuff from both the book and the series. It just makes it easier as a lead up to all the action. Hope it works. :)**

Adelina's POV

**D-Day plus 6**

**Carentan, France**

All I could hear was our shallow breathing as we finally assembled on the outskirts of Carentan. As one, we seemed to sink to the ground. My own wobbly legs gave way beneath me and I let out a long-withheld sigh. My rest was short-lived. I could dimly make out a shadow moving amongst the men. I could hear Winters asking for me from the men.

"You guys seen Adelina?"

"No, sir, I haven't seen her in hours."

"Lip, you seen Adelina?"

"No sir. Try Guarnere or Luz. I think they're keeping a close eye on her." I smiled tiredly. Guarnere was sitting right next to me and he turned to look at me and wink. Finally, Winters found me.

"Adelina, could you come with me, please?" I nodded and stood, against the screaming protest of every muscle in my body. Winters led me aside. I could hear the soft chatter of the men and couldn't help but feel calmed.

I glanced at Winters. Though he was being as nice as ever to me, I could feel something brewing under the surface. My eyes moved down to my hands and then back to his face before I voiced my concerns.

"Lieutenant, are you alright?" I asked quietly. He glared at the ground and shook his head. He seemed to hesitate a moment before leaning forward.

"I'm beyond frustrated to be honest. We've been moving around all night while Regiment tries to figure out where to put us. The men are exhausted and if we move one more God Damned time, we won't have any Easy guys left who'll have the strength to fight," Winters explained, making sure to keep his voice low and his tone maintained. I nodded, knowing that he was right. I was surprised that Dick had cursed, let alone in front of me, but I understood and kept my mouth shut about it. I could tell that he was absolutely livid that his men weren't going to have the opportunity to fight at their best.

My throat tightened when I thought about what this would mean. All my earlier fears of one of the men getting hurt overcame me once again. I wrung my hands together, trying to think of anything but the reality of the situation.

And the reality was that some of these men would die. Maybe not here, not on this day, but eventually...

"Adelina?" Winters called softly, bringing me abruptly back to the present. I cringed as I met his gaze. Concern washed over his face as he took in my frightened expression. As if on instinct, he grabbed my hand and squeezed it. He smiled in a reassuring manner at me.

"Everything is going to turn out alright, Adelina, don't worry."

"It's sort of hard not to, Dick," I muttered. He nodded in agreement and shifted from one foot to the other.

"Speaking of getting in position, I think I have an idea of where you can stay until I send one of the men to come and get you again. Obviously I can't spare any of them to look after you, not on this big of an assignment. So, I'm going to have to trust you to stay put." He looked down at me and I could see that he was serious.

"I wouldn't dream of distracting any of you. It'd be risking too much," I said sensibly. Dick looked a little taken aback by my calm attitude.

"What?" Even in the dim light, I could see his cheeks grow red.

"It's just I didn't expect you to come so quietly on this is all." He refused to look at me directly and I giggled internally.

"Meaning that you didn't think that any woman was ever capable of being reasonable when it came to this sort of thing?" I teased. Dick cracked a smile and shook his head. Finally, he met my eyes. I could see some degree of warmth there that I had noticed sometimes when he would look at me.

"I'm glad we found you on D-Day," he told me. My eyes welled up at this simple statement and I wiped the tears away as quickly as they had come.

"Dick, stop being so sensitive. We have a job to do," I said, my voice strained from the emotions buzzing around in my head. He grinned and looked over my shoulder at something in the distance. He nodded and I turned around to see Nixon walking toward us. He had a boyish smile on his face and I couldn't help but return it.

"Dick, I believe it's all set up," Nixon said, making it a point not to look at me. I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms over my chest as I glared at them.

"Whatever you have planned, I won't be a part of it." Nixon laughed as Winters looked at me with a sly smirk.

"Adelina, you've already agreed to stay out of the way. Believe me, I'm sure you'd rather be with Dog Company than Easy on this one," Winters said. I shifted my eyes to the ground, not really understanding what they were getting at. What was so special about Dog Company and why were Nixon and Winters smiling at each other like that?

"What are you up to?" I asked them suspiciously. Nixon and Winters glanced at each other one last time. Dick looked down at me and checked his watch.

"It's 5:50 now, Nix. You should take her," Winters said with a quick sigh. I shook my head stubbornly.

"No!" I nearly shouted as Nixon grabbed my hand and tried to lead me away. Winters pressed his lips together to stop himself from laughing.

"Adelina, please don't be difficult," Nixon pleaded. Something in my crumbled. I could feel my own exhaustion creeping on me slowly and knew that Nixon wasn't in any way ready to deal with a head-strong woman at the moment.

"Alright, this one time I'll be good," I acquiesced. Nixon took my hand again. I pulled away, this time to throw my arms around Dick. I realized this could likely be the last time I would get to see him. My heart wrenched painfully at the idea. He tensed beneath me but quickly relaxed as the initial shock wore off. He wrapped his arms around me before I let go of him.

"Please take care of yourself. Don't get shot," I told him, trying to sound strong. It didn't really work as my eyes were welling up. Dick smiled and jerked his head behind me indicating that I really should be going.

"I'll have to ask you to do the same." With that, he turned around and returned to the men as Nixon tugged on my arm.

"Adelina, we have to hurry." I nodded and we walked as fast as we could towards Dog Company.

"D Company was put in reserve for this one," Nixon explained to me as we got closer, "Dick thought it would be the perfect place to put you. If we need them during the fighting for any reason, Lieutenant Speirs has been ordered-."

"Lieutenant Speirs!" I repeated, my heart kicking into overdrive as the name rolled off my lips. Nixon self-satisfied grin told me everything I needed to know. His and Dick's strange behavior earlier now made complete sense. I seethed in silence until we came across a company of paratroops. The sun was just beginning to rise over the horizon and I could see the astonishment on each man's face when they figured out that I was in fact a woman. I searched wildly for that face that had haunted my thoughts for the past five days and nights.

Finally, my eyes found his. For a moment, I was totally engrossed in those dark pools. Then, slowly, I became aware again of the large amount of people that surrounded us. I blushed fiercely and stared down at the ground.

"I have to get back, Adelina," Nixon said quietly beside me. I turned to him and stared. I was amazed that I could still see Easy Company. He followed my line of attention and shrugged slightly when I looked at him with questions burning in my eyes.

"Dick's idea. He figured that if you could still see us then you would feel better about having to stay out of the action." I smiled and nudged a bit of dirt with my boot. I was surprised when Nixon's hand coaxed my chin upward. I stared up at him and he smiled. He squeezed my arm lightly.

"We're gonna be okay, Adelina. I won't tell you not to worry. I won't tell you not to expect a few of us to get hurt or worse. I know you can handle it. You've seen combat before and I trust you to stay where Dick tells you to stay." I nodded and gave him a weak smile.

"Yeah. Well, just don't do anything stupid alright?"

"Agreed," he replied and turned away. I felt as if I'd already lost him and the rest of Easy. Until I felt a hand close around mine. My eyelids dropped over my eyes as if on instinct. This warmth was so familiar. Every inch of me was now burning as I focused all my attention on the feeling of his fingers curled around mine. I felt him draw closer to me. I hadn't moved and he was probably wondering about my lack of responsiveness to him.

"Miss Jones?" his voice whispered my name as a seductive pull from my own thoughts. Without much effort, I opened my eyes and saw that he was staring down at me with a blazing curiosity shining in every speck of his dark eyes. I felt like I was staring into his soul and couldn't help but feel that he was experiencing the same thing. My lips parted slightly only to be snapped shut when someone talked behind us.

"Lieutenant Speirs, permission to speak, sir?" A cold whisper of air filled the void of his missing fingers and sent a chill down my spine. He stared for a moment longer into my eyes and then turned away.

"What is it?" he asked the soldier, his voice completely void of any emotions. The soldier's eyes flickered between the two of us. I felt his anxiety. It seemed that a lot of men were terrified of the man beside me. Don's words floated unaffected through my mind.

" _Just be careful around him, alright?" _My eyes roved over the stern posture with which he held himself. I wondered if it was purely a show or if he was doing it unconsciously. I had to admit that those swirling dark orbs could be intimidating. Especially when he was angry.

"What is it, Rider?" Lieutenant Speirs asked the breathless man.

"Sir, are we staying in reserve for this whole thing?" Speirs' eyes turned toward me for the briefest moment.

"As far as I know, we are, Private," he replied, his voice cold and striking as a blade drawn across bare skin. I shivered, my eyelids closing over my line of sight. A memory, as suddenly forgotten as it came upon me rose up from the dregs of my mind and filled my every sense and my every thought as if I were right back in that dark room with no hope of escape and no way to reach the outside world. All I could do was whimper and pray that soon it would be over.

_I was sitting with the officers, watching the card game with little interest. I felt a hand curl around my bony shoulder and looked up at the face of Standartenfuhrer Fleischer. It was stern and masked behind eyes as empty and dark as that of a hole with no bottom. I shivered, temporarily frozen for the shock that overcame when he looked at me. It had become a ritual of his to come to me and I hated it. I hated him and I hated what he had done to me on countless times. Mostly I hated myself for being so weak that I refused to go to someone for help. It would be simple. I would send word to Captain Fields or even Colonel Dobey to tell them of the atrocities I'd been subjected to for the past three months. But when I considered what it would mean, what I would be doing not only to myself but to my country, I pushed the idea from my mind. I couldn't possibly go home. If this war didn't end soon, then there would be a lot more suffering in the world. I wouldn't give up. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did. _

_The fingers gripping me through my uniform were tightening ever so slightly and I slowly felt my legs complying to the monster's will. None of the officers even batted an eyelash. They knew, or had an idea, about what was going on between the two of us, and didn't say a word. After all, Fleischer was their commander and in the SS, no soldier ever questioned the man in charge unless they wanted to be shot as an example for everyone else. _

_He led me toward the back of the bunker where his room was located. Though I couldn't see his face, I knew that he must have been looking at me with that same aggressive lust in his eyes. I'd seen it many times before and it scared me shitless just thinking about it. When we got to his quarters, he reached around me to grip the door knob in his palm. He turned it, the sound of metal grinding against metal sending a numbing cold through my body. Against my will my feet moved from the dim light of the hallway to the inside of his room. He flipped a switch and instantly, my pupils contracted, extending painfully until I could feel as if the backs of my eyeballs were on fire. Then, I heard the soft thud as the lock slid into place on the door behind me. I waited for his greedy hands to pull me to him, for him to twist me around so that I could see him as he devoured my soul and my heart. _

"_I've been waiting for this all day," he muttered in my ear. A small whimper left my lips, which seemed to only egg him on. He lightly kissed my neck. I wondered how easy it would be to kick him in the groin and then take off. As if he could hear my thoughts, his arms snaked around my waist and he pulled me closer. _

_His hands were moving under my shirt to pull it off. I hated that he was so gentle, as if I were the most precious thing in the world to him. But I knew that I wasn't. I could feel his wedding band scalding into the skin of my bare stomach. It sickened me but I knew I could do nothing about it except close my eyes and wait for it to end. _

_After a few minutes of assaulting my neck, he told me to go to the bed. I did as he asked and watched from the mattress as he flipped the switch, bathing us in darkness. That unrelenting terror filled me and I could do nothing but sit in silence even as every particle in my body screamed at me to run and hide. _

_But there was nowhere to hide and doing so would earn a beating the likes of which I had never experienced._

_I felt the bed sink down as he sat beside me. Everything after that was nothing but a blur of discarded clothing, heated flesh, and soft moans. Afterwards, he draped the covers over me. He dressed quickly and left the room with no backward glance and no apologies for once again taking what didn't rightfully belong to him. Unable to comprehend what I had done to deserve this, I curled up into a ball and cried until I could cry no more. _

Speirs' POV

When her knees buckled beneath her, all I could do was wrap my arms around her waist and hold her to me. The heat radiating from her core was piercing me like a white hot brand even through my clothes. Her head tipped back against my shoulder and it was all I could do not to kiss the tantalizing flesh of her exposed neck. My heart palpitated painfully within my chest. I could see her own pulse ticking fiercely on the side of her neck. I gulped, watching her eyes flutter. Her breath was becoming more rapid and I did not know for the life of me what to do.

What I heard next nearly brought me to my knees. Soft whimpers fell from the lips of the angel in my arms and my heart crumbled. It was obvious she was reliving some horrible experience and I wished desperately that I knew how to stop it. Her arms fastened around me. She was clinging to me like a small child would, seeking comfort from its parents. On instinct, oblivious to everyone around me but her, I tightened my grip on her waist. I held her close to me and rocked her silently as dry sobs wracked her body.

"It's alright now," I whispered in her ear, hoping against everything that my voice would pull her from her poisonous past. The minutes ticked on and finally, her eyes opened. I looked down at her and could not help but gasp. Those shimmering orbs of green stared back at me with so much pain and sadness that all I could do was ogle at her. No woman had ever looked at me with so much raw emotion stirring in her eyes. That protective side of me burst through and I found that my fingers were playing lightly on her cheek before I could stop myself. The look in her eyes softened to something infinitely more divine. The pain was still there but it was quickly being masked by happiness and gratitude as she realized she was no longer living her worst nightmare.

"Thank you," she muttered. A pink shade raced across her cheeks and she bit her lip, now aware of our positions.

"It was nothing," I told her, "Are you alright now?" She nodded slowly, as if she were sure but couldn't really believe that the horrible memory was just that now. It amazed me that I could find her anymore attractive. But something about the subtle trembling of her shoulders, revealing the depth of her vulnerability to me, was all too alluring. Something in my eyes must have alerted her for she laid a hand on my arm.

"Lieutenant?" I mentally cleared my expression of whatever it was that I was allowing her to see as quickly as I could. Feeling that I needed to put some space between us, I stood up and hauled her to here feet.

"I'm glad that you are alright," I explained and then turned to the men in my company. I was still the only officer in the company, which meant that I was in charge.

"D Company, listen up!" I said over the slight uproar that had arisen while I was tending to the woman beside me. As one, their eyes turned to me and their mouths snapped shut, "This is Adelina Jones. She's going to be staying with us until Carentan is secured." I wondered if she could hear the way my voice wrapped around her name. I hated myself for it, but I couldn't help it. And if I was being honest with myself, I didn't want to.

I didn't offer any further explanation to them. I knew that I didn't have to. My reputation as a complete hard-ass had its advantages. Men accepting what I said with questioning it was one of them.

So, without any real conscious effort on my part, I threaded my fingers through hers and pulled her to the back of the company where we might be able to talk alone.

**So that chapter was an amazing experience for me. I got to use the book and the movies as reference, but pretty much all of that was of my own creation. Yeah, I know what I just wrote reinforces the stereotype that most people had of the Germans in World War Two, but honestly he is SS and he wasn't mean to her except for the whole raping thing. Oh and for the fact of the day, the Standartenfuhrer is the SS rank of an officer who commanded regiment-sized formations of between 300 and 500 men. **

**So that about does it. Oh! I wanted to give shout outs to: captain ty, iHedge, and Iloveboyswhosparkle, jjbroadway, and wild-in-spirit. They are amazing because they send me reviews. And I love anyone who takes time out of their busy schedules to do that. Also thank you to iHedge who was more than willing to help out with this chapter. Even though I didn't wait for her reply to my PM to post this. :D I hope you all enjoy it and have a great week, day, month, year, and all of the above!**


	10. Chapter 10

_You're beautiful, you're beautiful_

_You're beautiful, it's true_

_There must be an angel with a smile on her face_

_When she thought up that I should be with you_

_But it's time to face the truth, _

_I will never be with you _

_~ "You're Beautiful" by James Blunt_

Adelina's POV

"_It's alright now," _the voice called me from the black abyss that I had tumbled into. So assuring, so soft, and so irresistible. I followed the sound of the voice from the recesses of my mind to the warmth of reality. I willed my eyes to open and I found myself staring at the face of Lieutenant Speirs. All I could care about was the fact that his arms were around me. I had never felt so safe in my life. I caught the sight of some men sitting close by and I focused again on Speirs, painfully aware of the way he was holding me.

"Thank you," I said awkwardly then blushed at my own stupidity.

"It was nothing. Are you alright now?" he asked and I couldn't tell what he was thinking. It was slightly unnerving, so I just nodded. As I watched him, his eyes grew more defined and more clear than anything I'd ever seen. Worried, I laid a hand on his arm.

"Lieutenant?" As if just now aware that he was staring at me, he cloaked his emotions and stood up, dragging me with him.

"I'm glad that you are alright," he said, his tone barely masking the cold distance with which he was now regarding me.

"D Company, listen up! This is Adelina Jones. She's going to be staying with us until Carentan is secured," he told his men. I watched their eyes shift from him to me as if they couldn't quite believe that they were seeing us. They turned around, accepting his poor excuse for an explanation without question. I felt his fingers thread through mine as he led me away to somewhere more private. My heart was pounding in my ears. Did he want to know what happened to me? Could I tell him? Before I found the answers I wanted from myself, he stopped and let go of my hand. I stared at the ground, fear filling every crevice of my being. I couldn't do this. I glanced up at him. His face was still cloaked in indifference and perhaps even boredom.

A part of me wondered what was wrong with him. One moment he was reassuringly wrapping his arms around me and lulling me with his unspoken promises that everything would be alright. The next, he was distant and terrifying in the lack of emotion exuding from his carefully controlled mask.

"Are you sure you're alright?" I gulped audibly.

"I-It's just...." I was saved from saying anything as the sounds of gun shots filled my ears. My head whipped around towards the source of the noise on its own accord. Lieutenant Speirs fell silent beside me, for which I was eternally grateful.

The next few hours were hell on Earth. I'd become attached to Easy company, perhaps more than I should have given the circumstances. I knew that it was only a matter of time before I was sent back to England. And I had a feeling that I wouldn't be the only one that would be sad to see me go.

I listened to the shouts, screams, and whining of the bullets from a safe distance away. Every pore of my being ached to stand up and run towards them. I knew that I couldn't and it was all I could do not to defy every reasonable voice in my head.

I tried to think of anything other than what was happening right before my eyes. I thought of dew- drenched fields in my home town. Mr. McGee's pit bull which seemed to be waiting for me every time I took a trip to his store for groceries. I thought of my baby sister, even though the memories of her beautiful, innocent face was like plunging a knife through my heart. And occasionally, when my thoughts became too dark, I would look at Lieutenant Speirs. Mostly his eyes were focused on Carentan, but sometimes it seemed like he was very far away. Now that I had spent more time with him, he seemed like a very withdrawn person. Not once did he try to strike up a conversation. In fact, he was ignoring me altogether.

I pulled my knees to my chest. Feeling mentally exhausted, I put my head on my arms and closed my eyes. It wasn't sleeping, but it was a welcome reprieve from the monotony of the scene before us. However, that didn't work either. I _had _to keep my eyes set on the horizon. The compelling need to stare at that hill was too much for me. So, I stayed like that for hours just gazing at Carentan, waiting all the while for someone to come and get me.

A sigh of relief escaped me when I saw someone walking from Carentan back to where Dog Company had been placed for the attack. As they got closer, I saw that it was George Luz. Adrenaline rushed straight to my head when I realized that at least one of them had made it through. I jumped to my feet and rushed toward him. He opened his arms to me, obviously anticipating the impact. I wrapped my arms around him and we hugged each other.

"Oh, George, you're okay!" I squealed. I felt him chuckle against me. He kissed the top of my head.

"Yep, I'll live to fight the Huns another day," he told me with a laugh. I pulled away from him and asked him if I was allowed to come back now. He nodded.

"Yeah, Lieutenant Winters gave the all-clear, so you can come back now. The guys will be happy to see you." I bit my lip, mentally ticking off another name from my list of men that I might have lost.

"How bad was it?" I asked, knowing he would get my drift.

"Tipper was inside of a house when an explosion went off. Lip got a chunk to his face and one that almost took off his..." I clapped a hand over my mouth as George made a motion towards his southern vitals.

"That's terrible. Is he okay?"

"He's a little shaken up, but he'll be alright." I looked to the ground.

"Was that it?" I was almost ashamed to ask, but it was yet another thing I had to know.

"That's it as far as I know, Adelina." I nodded and George took my hand.

"You wanna go back now?" That's when I remembered Lieutenant Speirs.

"Yeah, just a second." I rushed back to where he was still sitting and knelt beside him. I was blushing, but I knew that nothing could help that. I swiftly kissed his cheek.

"Thank you again, Lieutenant Speirs, for what you did." His dark orbs bore into my own. Without saying anything, he looked away and nodded. Knowing that I wouldn't get anything else out of him, I stood up and went back to George, whose eyes were so full of mirth that I knew I was in for a lot of embarrassment once we were out of ear-shot of D Company. I narrowed my eyes at him and pointed a finger at him.

"Not a word, George," I warned him and he held up his hands in mock surrender.

"So where to, Adelina?"

"Take me to wherever Doc Roe is. I'm sure I'd be much more help in a makeshift field hospital than out here where I'm liable to get hurt," I told him quietly as my eyes moved slowly over the heaps of rubble and the dead bodies scattered on the cobbled streets. George noticed what had attracted my attention and he coaxed my face upwards with the tips of his fingers.

"Hey, don't look at it, alright?" I nodded solemnly and kept my eyes straight forward. Around the corner came a man on a horse. George took a moment to salute, which was not returned. Although, who can blame him? He seemed pretty keen on getting to wherever it was that he was headed.

"Damn cowboy," I heard Luz mutter.

"Luz, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" a familiar voice behind us asked. I twirled around and jumped on the man before me. It was Webster.

"Well, hi." I let my feet touch the ground again and smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry, I'm just glad you weren't hurt."

"Yeah, I'm good. For now anyway." I smacked his arm half-heartedly.

"Don't say things like that, Webster." He only grinned in response.

"Where are you guys off to?"

"To find Doc Roe. You?"

"I'm just sort of wandering around. I was checking to see if there weren't any guys who'd been caught in a building or something and needed help." Beside me, I heard Luz snicker.

"Good luck with that, Web," Luz said and grabbed my hand.

"See you later, Webster." He winked at me when I turned to look at him one last time. Luz kept his fingers wrapped firmly around mine until we finally found Doc Roe. When I recognized the face of the person he was treating, I nearly screamed.

"Dick, are you alright?! What happened?" I exclaimed as I rushed toward him. He cringed slightly as Eugene removed what looked to be a ricochet from his calf.

"I'm okay, or at least I should be. They want me to stay off it for a few days."

"Yeah, well it'll only heal if you stay off it," Roe said. Winters rolled his eyes skyward, earning a giggle from me.

"Medic!" I heard a man yell from somewhere off to my left. Without hesitation, I lurched towards the noise, but Roe grabbed my arm.

"You stay with him. I'll get this one," he said. I nodded silently and took his place. Dick sighed in relief.

"My God, I'd be lying if I said that being reprimanded by Doc Roe isn't the most terrifying experience of the day," he said and he looked rather shaken. I laughed as I cleaned his wound with alcohol.

"You lead these men into combat and _Eugene _yelling at you for getting hurt was the scariest part of today,?" I grinned. I saw someone move in the corner of my eye. It was Buck Compton.

"Hey Adelina. Hey Dick," Compton said with that boyish grin on his face.

"How you holding up, Buck?"

"Good, and yourself?"

"Well, I wasn't really anywhere near the fighting, so pretty good." Buck laughed.

"Well, being close to Hard-ass Speirs is no picnic in the park, Adelina." I blushed.

"Everyone keeps saying that he's such a hard-ass and that I should be careful around him. I don't understand it. He's perfectly civil towards me." I looked up just in time to see Buck and Dick exchange a significant look. They noticed me staring at them and hurriedly moved their eyes to the ground.

"Speaking of Speirs, Dick, what on Earth are you on about sending me back there with him?" I asked Winters, who blanched immediately.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, just something that I figured out while Nix was taking me back to Dog Company." Buck covered his hand with his mouth.

"God, Adelina, I would have thought you'd be happy with us. After all, we only gave you a few hours with your favorite man in the world," Nixon's voice floated toward us. I glanced over my shoulder to see him walking over to where we were.

"Yeah, I would be except for the fact that our time together was anything but pleasant." Nix's smile only grew wider.

"Oh, yeah I heard about that from some of the Dog Company guys. Something about you passing out and Speirs holding you in his arms." I blushed as I wrapped Dick's calf.

"Like I said. It was not a pleasant few hours."

"Sounds sort of romantic. In a really twisted way." I rolled my eyes.

"You passed out?" Dick asked me, taking my hand suddenly so that I would look at him. Hesitantly, I nodded, mentally willing him not to ask anything more about it. Dick was never one for taking a hint, not from me anyway.

"What happened?"

"It's nothing, Dick. I just wasn't feeling very well. I think I was just really worried about all of you." He eyed me warily, but chose not to press me.

"Alright, I'll take that for now."

"Thank you, Dick," I said and placed my hands in my lap, "And I'm finished with you." Dick smiled slightly.

"Thanks, Adelina." There was a moment of silence between the four of us before Buck cleared his throat.

"So, what's the plan, Lieutenant?" Dick sighed and reached behind himself for his helmet. He gave Buck a look that clearly said, 'Wait until we're outside.'

"Oh I see, you guys are going to exclude me now?" Dick smiled but then shrugged.

"Strayer seems to think that you can tag along with us, but that we can't give you any information on what we might be planning against the Germans. Not until everything is cleared up with Colonel Dobey." I nodded and waved them off.

"Alright, I think I'll just stay here and help Doc Roe and the other medics for a while."

**I am so sorry about the long wait. Ugh it's been a crazy few weeks. Anyway, I really hope you liked this chapter. It was a lot of fun to write and I am sorry about the lack of confrontation a few of you (iHedge :D) were hoping for in this chapter. I actually thought that I would get maybe more towards the end of Episode 3 in this one, but I didn't. Definitely more Speirs/Adelina stuff next time. Please send me a review if you have the time. :)**

**And a special thanks to: iHedge, Iloveboyswhosparkle, jjbroadway, and captain ty who are my reviewers of last chapter. I love you all and thanks for the wonderful and encouraging messages. I really appreciate it. **


	11. Chapter 11

Adelina's POV 

"Adelina, let's go, we're moving out," Roe called over his shoulder at me. I nodded swiftly and secured my medical bag around my neck. Together, we left the field hospital and made our way over to where Easy Company was being assembled. Roe wandered off to join second platoon while I made my way towards Lieutenant Welsh. His eyes widened and a smile crept onto his face.

"Well if it isn't our very own Easy Company nurse," Welsh said as I came closer. I grinned.

"Yep, that's me, Harry," I replied, giving him a one-armed hug. He pulled away first. His hand slid beneath his jacket. When he pulled it out, he was holding a .45 pistol.

"Dick said that you should carry this around. Just in case, you know," Harry said and handed it to me. As my fingers closed around the cold metal, I shuddered slightly. I stuck it in the belt of my pants even though all I wanted to do was toss it to the ground.

"Thanks, Harry." He nodded and then proceeded to give instructions to the men. I watched them all blanch slightly at the thought of possibly going back into battle. Over the past week, they'd already been through more than their fair share of battle and were probably under the impression that it would never end. I only hoped that they were all strong enough to face whatever the Huns decided to throw at them.

Over all of the men's voices, I heard one in particular that happened to be calling my name.

"Adelina?!" It was Lieutenant Winters. I turned in the direction of his voice and went over to him.

"Hey, Dick," I said. My voice was filled with exhaustion and I found that I couldn't hide it. Concern flashed in his eyes, but he chose not to voice his thoughts, for which I was very grateful.

"Hey Adelina," he greeted me, then immediately got down to business, "Now, Harry is going to be in the front with First Platoon. Then Buck in the middle with Second and I'll be at the very back with Third. I want you back there with me. If we do get attacked, it'll most likely be in the front." I nodded carefully.

"Okay, great."

"And Harry gave you that pistol right?"

"Yes, bloody hell, Dick! You don't have to worry about me so much." Winters blushed and averted his eyes to the ground. The statement had come out a little harsher than I'd meant it to.

"I'm sorry, Dick. I shouldn't have...I know I shouldn't make excuses for myself, but I think the sleep deprivation is really getting to me." He took my hand and squeezed it.

"It's alright. I understand." His icy blue eyes seemed to pierce through me and I felt tears trailing down my cheeks. Before I could do anything, Dick brushed them away with his thumbs. I laughed slightly until I saw the look in his eyes.

"Adelina, are you going to be alright?" Feeling the need to be honest with him, I shrugged.

"I don't know, Dick." He nodded and dropped his hand from my face.

"Hang tough. That's all you can really do." I snorted suddenly and buried my face in my hands. When I had myself under control, I looked back up at Dick. His expression was one of utter confusion.

"_Hang tough_? Honestly, Dick, you should find a new catch phrase."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you say that all the time, to everyone." Dick grinned sheepishly and shrugged his shoulders. I glanced around his arm and saw that the men were now looking over at us curiously. I nodded toward them and Dick followed my line of sight.

"We should probably get going then," I muttered. Dick nodded at me and then did the same to Harry Welsh.

"Let's go, First Platoon!" Welsh yelled. As one, Easy Company marched off towards God knew where to face God knew what. Not for the last time, I hoped that we would be able to pass through the countryside without incident. But it wasn't to be.

***

The shots cut through my core and sent shivers down my spine. Ahead of us, I could hear Harry Welsh shouting something at us. I turned to Dick who motioned towards the hedgerows off to our side. I nodded and watched as the men rushed to find cover from the Germans.

My heart was pounding in my ears and the adrenaline running through my veins was making my head spin. I was a foot away from safety when I heard a pained shout behind me. I turned around and felt my eyes go wide. I didn't need to choose between leaving him there and saving myself. I doubled back and heard the men shouting my name. Bullets whizzed past my head and landed just far enough away from my feet. I slid slightly on the broken earth and grabbed his hand. The skin was as cold as ice, but I was determined not to leave him alone. His face turned up towards me.

"I'm going to get you out of here, don't worry." With a strength that astounded me, I hoisted his arm over my shoulder and started running back towards the hedgerows. The other guys were staring at me as if I had checked into the funny farm. I settled him so that his back was against the dirt wall. I looked him over and quickly found the source of his pain. Blood had soaked through his ODs. I gasped slightly as the size of the expanse of blood only enlarged. Over the clatter of machine guns in the distance, I could hear his screams of pain. I dug through my medical bag for morphine. When I found it, I plunged it into his shoulder. His body relaxed and his expression changed into one of a man in complete bliss. I allowed myself a small smile before I set to fixing him up. I cut off the circulation to his arm, hoping to God that I was not too late. Then, I tore open his uniform. It was worse than I had previously thought. The bullet had cut through an artery. Even with the tourniquet, I could see that he was losing blood too fast.

"Bloody hell!" I mumbled. Not seeing any other way to do it, I wiped the blood pool off his arm with my hand. It spilled into my lap, but I couldn't think of that right now. I poured a packet of sulfa over the hole in his arm and then placed a bandage over it. I wrapped it as tight as it could go and then leaned back slightly to look at my patient. I was thankful that his eyes were closed. His breathing was shallow, but I had expected it. I checked his pulse. His heart rate was through the roof, but it was still strong-a very good sign.

I smiled as I leaned back against the wall next to him. He was alright and I was alright. What more could a girl ask for?

***

The sun was dipping below the horizon by the time that the artillery quieted down slightly. All the guys leaned back against the walls of the hedgerow.

"Well done, men!" George Luz exclaimed in an imitation of General Taylor's voice. I laughed along with the rest of the men, who all turned to me. I waited for them to say something, but none of them did. They all just stared. I tried to ignore them, but I just couldn't.

"If you're going to ask me what the hell I was thinking, then do it. Otherwise, I'd like it if you all stop staring at me," I said calmly. I was too tired to get properly mad at them.

"Well, what the hell _were_ you thinking? You coulda been killed!" Guarnere reprimanded me.

"I was saving a man's life. And I think I did a pretty damn good job of it."

"We didn't say you didn't. But do you know how hard we're gonna get it from the big guns when they hear about it?" I heard a groan from a few of the guys.

"And Speirs? What's he gonna say?" My heart jumped at the mention of the object of my affections, but I only laughed.

"I imagine he wouldn't _say or do _anything. It's not as if he has any feelings for me." I bit my lip, knowing that I wanted nothing more than to believe that wasn't true.

"Don't make us laugh, Adelina. You haven't seen the way he looks at you."

"I'm not sure I want you to elaborate on that, Frank."

"He looks at you like..." Skip Muck trailed off, trying to find the right words for what he was trying to say.

"Like I look at a bottle of Vat 69," I heard Lewis Nixon say as he dropped into our section of hedgerow. He scooted next to me and ruffled my hair.

"Wow, I guess I should feel flattered then," I laughed, not able to hide my excitement at the fact that Speirs might be interested in me.

"How you guys doin'?" Nix asked us all. We all told him that we were fine. That's when his eyes caught sight of the Private sleeping next to me.

"And what the hell happened to him?" All of the guys tensed and I could tell that they didn't really want to face that particular pot of tea just yet.

"Wow, Nix, I though you said you went to Yale," I said as I glanced pointedly at the bandage wrapped around his arm. Nix glowered at me while the guys all laughed.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up guys," he smacked my arm playfully, "I was hoping you'd be able to give me a good story, but I can see that you're useless to my need for entertainment." He hopped up onto the grass lining the trench and stood up.

"See you guys later."

"Yes, sir," we all said. I grabbed my medical bag and scooted closer to the other guys. The man closest to me was Skip Muck. He smiled at me as I leaned a head against a shoulder.

"You wanna get me killed, Adelina?" I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up, Muck, and let me go to sleep." He saluted me.

"Yes, ma'am." I yawned and shifted so I was more comfortable. I groaned a second later when I felt someone hit my shoulder as they slipped down next to me.

"Hey guys, looks like we're gonna be here for a while. Lieutenant Winters wants us to dig in, alright?" He left without another word and I groaned again.

"Damn Yanks," I muttered, hoping that no one heard me.

"Adelina, who you staying with?" Skip Muck asked me as he too stood up. I shrugged.

"I have no idea, Skip. I just want to crawl in a hole and die." Skip chuckled at my joke and threw an arm over my shoulder.

"Just come and share one with me and Don." We made our way down the hedgerow to where Malarkey was getting ready to dig their foxhole. With the three of us, it would be done in no time. So, when both men protested to me helping, I heaved a sigh.

"Why not?" I demanded, placing my hands on my hips.

"You're exhausted. You don't have to help."

"I'm sure I'm not nearly as tired as you guys are. Let me help."

"No, Adelina. We've got this." I glared at them for a moment before throwing my hands up in frustration.

"Fine. I won't argue with you on this one. I'll just go and try to find Captain Nixon and Lieutenant Winters." I walked off and soon found Nix and Dick sitting in a finished foxhole already.

"Flash."

"Thunder," I said and slipped into the foxhole next to Nixon.

"Pretty nice place you got here," I grinned as I got comfortable once again. Dick nodded.

"Yeah, so are you staying here tonight then?" I could something in his eyes that I couldn't quite place. And I wasn't sure that I wanted to. I decided not to dwell on it. It could be my eyes playing tricks on me.

"Well, I was going to stay in a hole with Malarkey and Muck, but they refused to let me help. I was too tired to really argue it, so I just came over here to be with you guys." Nixon pretended to wipe his eyes.

"Geez, Dick, she really does love us." I smacked his arm, making him growl.

"Why do you always do that to me?"

"Because you deserve it," I said with a smug smile. I leaned my head against the wall of the foxhole and soon found my eyelids closing. I was dimly aware of Nixon and Winters leaving before I dropped off to sleep.

When I woke up, I was still alone. I felt much better. Still tired, but I knew that I'd gotten enough sleep to be able to function a little better. I stood up, stretched, and climbed out of the foxhole. I made a point to find Winters or Nixon to tell them that I was not awake now. I soon found Dick and Harry walking together. They noticed me and I saw them both smile.

"Ah, our very own Prima Donna awakens."

"_Prima Donna_? Is that what you think of me, Harry?"

"Yeah. That's the only way you could have gotten the liberty of sleeping." I noticed that under the smile, he looked just as exhausted as I had a few hours ago.

"Why don't you go get some sack time, Harry. I can fill in for you."

"Really?" his eyes lit up, then he looked over at Dick, who had a smirk on his face. I glanced at our commanding officer too. I gave him my most charming smile, which made him blush.

"It's okay, right Dick?"

"Sure. Go get some rest, Harry." Welsh pulled me into a tight hug and kissed my cheek.

"Thank you, Adelina. Really, you don't know how much I appreciate it." I shoved him off towards the direction of the line.

"It's the least I can do. Sweet dreams, Harry." He waved tiredly and disappeared into the darkness. I turned back around and found Dick staring at me.

"You sure you're gonna be okay with this?" I nodded assuringly.

"Absolutely. I mean, how hard could making the rounds be?" Dick snorted.

"Alright, well, I'll see you in a bit." With that, he wandered off towards the right edge of the line while I went to the left.

Watching his retreating form, I noticed that my heart finally felt whole again. Who'd have thought that being beaten by the Germans would have brought on all of my good fortune? If you'd told me as much a few weeks ago, I wouldn't have believed you. Now, however, I knew that the healing process had already begun.

Then, I thought about what would happen after the war. I knew one thing for sure, I wanted nothing more than to be rid of that house that held so many horrible memories for me. In my parents will, everything had been left to me. I knew that with all of the pay I'd been hiding away plus the money I would get from selling the house would be more than enough for me to establish a new life for myself. The only question was where?

"Medic!" a sudden cry sliced through the crisp night air and sent chills down my spine. Without thinking twice, my legs twisted under me and I was headed toward the noise. It was the fastest I had ever run and I couldn't have been more thankful.

When I arrived on the scene, I saw Liebgott leaning over Sergeant Talbert.

"Med-, oh good. Floyd, Adelina's here," Liebgott tried to soothe his friend. I knelt down by their side and assessed the damage. It looked a lot like...

"You stabbed yourself with a bayonet?" I asked him incredulously as I started removing his clothing.

"No, Smith did it," Liebgott muttered.

"Hey, move out of my way!" I heard Roe's smooth Cajun voice command as he pushed me lightly out of the way.

"Oh sure, be the hero then, Doc," I muttered under my breath. Unfortunately, he heard me and sent a sly smile my way. We'd gotten to know each other very well and I knew that he could tell that I was joking with him.

"Well, from what I heard, you've establish yourself quite well in that category. Let some others take a stab at it for once," Liebgott said, wiggling his eyebrows up as he mentioned taking a stab at something. I placed my hands on my hips.

"That was so not funny, Joe." Liebgott just smiled at me. As Roe was now focused on fixing Floyd up, I threw up my hands in defeat.

"Fine, I'll just be go find some trouble then, yeah?" Even Talbert grinned at that. I stood up and turned around only to almost topple back over Gene. Standing before me was none other than Lieutenant Speirs. Luckily, his strong arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me to him so that I could remain steady.

"Easy, you're alright. I've got you." His voice was a sultry caress against my ear. It sent shivers of pleasure through my body and had me blushing like a complete idiot. Then, as quickly, he drew away from me and had walked off. In a daze, all I could do was stare after him.

"Adelina, go after him!" I heard one of the men behind me say. I giggled breathlessly and then rushed off into the forest. I caught him a short distance away. He was leaning casually against a tree and looking at me with a smug look on his face.

"Tell me something, Miss Jones. Do I make you nervous?" he asked. It was a perfectly simple question, so why did it bother me so much? Maybe it was because the smirk he was giving me didn't quite meet his eyes. I could sense that he was trying to fish something out of me, but I had no idea what that might be.

"Well, I suppose you do," I began warily.

"Is that why you fainted on me yesterday?" I stared at him in complete astonishment. He thought I had fainted because of him? I couldn't control myself as my laughter filled the air. When I did stifle my giggles, his stare was cold again, revealing nothing of what he might be thinking. It didn't stop me from making fun of him.

"Let me get this straight, Lieutenant. You think that I fainted because I'm nervous around you?" I broke into another fit of laughter. I heard him chuckling slightly and felt somehow proud that I'd broken through his steely exterior, if only for a moment.

"So I take it you didn't pass out because of my ridiculously good looks?" I shook my head with a grin plastered on my face. My cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but I couldn't find it in me to care.

"No, although I will admit you are a very decent looking bloke." His eyes darkened slightly and the wall fell between us again. I glanced shakily at the ground. I sensed him moving closer to me. My heart raced as his fingers coaxed my chin upwards so that I would look into his eyes.

"Then what was it?" he asked quietly. I swallowed, my throat contracting painfully. I knew, after staring into those dark orbs, that I had never wanted to reveal the truth to anybody so much. I was barely aware that I had his arm in a death grip until his warm fingers pried my own from his arm. He entwined his hand with mine. I felt his thumb drawing circles into the back of my hand and felt a little better. I heaved a sigh, knowing that it was now or never.

"I've never told anyone this, so forgive me if I get a little emotional." He didn't say a thing, only stared at me with those hard eyes of his.

"Before I joined the war effort, I had been living with my parents and my little sister, Sarah. My father was a lout and didn't do anything but go to work and then to the pub afterwards. Then he'd come home and drink more. He got mean when he'd had too much to drink and he would yell at all of us for things out of our control. He blamed us for every bad thing that ever happened in his life.

"One night I got tired of it and decided to stand up to him. He slapped me across the face. I nearly blacked out, but I managed to get downstairs right as he was leaving with my sister and my mother. He wouldn't tell me where he was taking them and I didn't even try to..." My eyes began to fill with tears, though I didn't want them to. I bit my lip, mentally forcing them back. I took a deep breath and continued. I had to finish this.

"He left and I blacked out. When I woke up, I was in the hospital with a slight concussion and a friend of mine told me that my entire family had died in a car crash. I've never gotten over the guilt of not saving my sister. She deserved better than what she had and I feel awful for realizing too late that if I'd tried harder she would have had a better life." My voice quieted and the tears were free to flow down my face. Speirs wrapped his arms around me and I let him pull me closer. The sensations now flowing through my veins was enough to curb the pain I was now feeling. At least I could think around the fog that had settled in my brain.

That's when I felt it. His breath was sliding against the skin at my neck. I shuddered, not sure how to react. One minute, he was acting as if he couldn't care less about me and now he was...

Soft and supple lips met my bare skin and continued in an achingly slow pace up my neck to my jaw. Every kiss seared through my haze and brought me closer to the present. My hands slowly knotted in his hair as I tried desperately to pull our bodies closer. His lips grew more fervent as they drew upwards to their final destination. I sighed in contentment and immediately wished I hadn't. With a deep growl, he pulled away from me. Even in the dark, I could see that his eyes were clouded with lust. But something stirred in the corners of those dark pools. Before I could place it, he turned away from me, his hand covering his face in obvious shame.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have taken advantage of you. You're obviously vulnerable and I apologize for being so untoward, Miss Jones." With those words, he disappeared into the forest and never once looked back. I felt torn between running after him and launching myself at him and slapping him for being so dim. But I knew that he obviously was as confused as I was about how I felt for him. As hard as it was for me, I decided that giving him some space was probably the best thing I could do. So, I collected myself and made sure that all of the guys were alright before finally settling down in Nixon and Dick's foxhole once again.

**EIGHT PAGES? Yeah that's right avid readers I, ber1719, have just completed my longest chapter ever in the history of this fanfic! So I'm sure you're excited about the fantastically quick update. I hope you liked it enough to want to leave me a review. In my personal opinion, I think that's the best chapter yet. Anywho, so I am finally through Episode 3 and on to Episode 4, Replacements. Any and all suggestions for whats to come for that one are welcome. And I think that's enough for my rambling. **

**But before I let you go, I would like to recognize those people who were so nice as to leave me a review for last chapter: Iloveboyswhosparkle, captain ty, iHedge, and PaperHeart382. Thanks a lot guys. I really appreciate the feedback. And I don't remember who it was that gave me the idea about Speirs saying that Adelina fainted because of him being so good looking, but thank you so much. And I'm sorry I couldn't remember. I feel like a terrible person, but it can't be helped now I guess. :D Oh yeah and thank you PaperHeart382 who suggested that Adelina should be using more British slang. I know it's kind of late in coming but I thought what better way to bring out the Brit in her than in the first battle we see her in? I hope it worked. if not, please tell me and i will fix it. Thanks guys. Love you all!**


	12. Chapter 12

_Warm hands pulled me close. Soft lips brushed against my temple, my cheek, along my jaw. Their breath blowing sensuously on my skin. Tremors racked my body. I leaned slightly away from them, my lungs fit to burst. I stared into two pools of dark chocolate filled with lust and swallowed hard. _

"_Adelina." They repeated my name over and over again. _

"Adelina! Wake up!" Something hard collided with my shoulder. My eyes snapped open and I glared long and hard at Luz.

"I was having a very pleasant dream, and you woke me up you huge git!" Luz looked back at me with a cheeky smile.

"Ah, honey, don't be mad. Besides, I'm sure Lieutenant Speirs would be more than willing to turn your dreams into a reality."

"Yeah, Adelina. We are going back to England after all." I rolled my eyes and turned away from all of them, crossing my arms over my chest. I could hear them all laugh at my expense. It only heightened my fury. They'd been making cracks about Speirs and I since we'd first boarded that ship back to Aldbourne. Now we were all packed into trucks and I no longer could go anywhere to get away from them.

I turned my eyes towards the back of the truck. A short distance away, I saw Dick in the drivers seat of a jeep. Nix was nowhere to be seen and I decided that Dick needed some company. Feeling my lips curl upwards, I stood up suddenly. Knowing that I had to go quickly, I hopped and maneuvered through their legs until I was able to jump out the back. A chorus of "heys" and "what the hell are you doings?" rose up to greet me as I felt my legs bend slightly under me. I saw Dick's eyes widen as I did this and he slammed on the breaks just short of hitting me. Luckily he was at the back of our little convoy so he wasn't in danger of being smashed into himself. I grinned at the frown that appeared on his face.

"Hey, Dick!" I said brightly, glad to finally be away from the pests in the truck. Although, now I had to worry about buttering Dick up. Under that calm facade, I knew that he was fuming about me almost getting myself killed, by him no less. I saw his hand laying between the seats and I hesitantly grabbed it. He tensed immediately at the contact.

"Dick? Please don't be mad," I said in my sweetest, most innocent tone of voice. He sent one look at me and I saw something there that was more than forgiveness. I tried to look closer, but he turned his attention back to the road before him.

"If you ever do that to me again, I'll have Nix here in a flash to start pestering you about Speirs himself."

"Careful, Dick. If you don't watch yourself, I might think that was an attempt at humor." I saw him give a small little smile and then it was gone. I felt his hand slip from mine and I almost wished that I had it in my grasp again. It was warm and comfortable, but I made no attempt to grab it again. He had to concentrate on driving, so I turned my eyes to the hills rolling past us.

If I was being honest with myself, I knew that it wasn't just the constant jibes the guys were making that had me angry. The scene in the forest kept playing itself in my head and I couldn't for the life of me make it stop. I'd been so close to telling him about the intimidating German who'd taken my virginity. But then his lips had caused all thoughts of telling him the entire truth to fly off to no man's land. I was angry with myself for being so easily distracted. Not that it hadn't been unwelcome. How long had I been fantasizing about something like that happening between us? Too long in my opinion. Maybe now that we were going off the line, we'd be able to further explore whatever connection there was between us.

"Adelina, we're here," Dick muttered softly beside me.

***

"Adelina, how is it that you've never played this game and yet you're kicking all of our asses?" Luz asked in amazement as I once again raked in the winnings from the center of the table. I grinned and winked at him.

"Maybe you're all too distracted by the pretty girls around that you can't find your concentration." Luz shrugged and leaned around me to get a good view of a blond girl he'd been making eyes with all night. Suddenly, everyone at the table got quiet. I looked around and sighed. They were all staring wide-eyed at something, or someone rather, over my head. I threw down my cards and crossed my arms over my chest.

"What is it now?" I asked as I turned in my seat. I gasped softly at the sight of Lieutenant Speirs standing behind me.

"Lieutenant Speirs."

"Miss Jones," he said. There was a slight pause before, "Could I speak with you a moment?" In a slight daze, I nodded. I went to stand up and he offered me his hand. Slightly embarrassed, I took it and he gently helped me to my feet. He kept a tight hold on me as we made our way through the swaying dancers and drunk soldiers. My heart was pounding. Did he know that I had lied to him? Did he want to continue what he'd left off on in the forest?

My whole body was on fire at the thought of his lips on my skin again. Thankfully, when we made it outside, the night air cooled me down and cleared my head. We stopped a short way from the doors and Speirs turned towards me.

"Lieutenant Speirs, is every-," I began.

"Ron." My eyebrow raised at the seemingly random outburst.

"What?"

"Ron is my name. I don't think there's any need for us to be so formal. Not tonight," he told me. I realized that he was still holding my hand and exhaled with some effort.

"Right. In that case, call me Adelina." A smile curled his lips. I couldn't help but smile back. A silence crept between us, but it wasn't at all awkward. In fact, it was sort of pleasant to be able to just stand here in the darkness with him and not say anything.

"Adelina, I wanted to ask you something." I bit my lip. Here it comes.

"Did you mean what you said when I asked you if I made you nervous?"

"What?" I asked, shocked that of all the things he could have asked, he chose that. He smirked as he took a step toward me. Instinctively, I tried to take a step backwards. My back hit a wall and I sucked in a breath.

"I..." The rest of my response was cut off by the look in his eyes. They were full of lust and want. I found that I couldn't look directly at him. Instead, I glanced over his eyebrows, deeply furrowed as if he was trying to hold himself back from something. In the dim light from the pub's slightly open door, I could see his pulse ticking in the vein in his neck. It was going just as fast as mine was. Startled and confused, I looked back up into his eyes only to realize that he'd gotten closer to me. I could feel his right thigh pinning me to the wall. His left hand cautiously touched mine, as if he was afraid that I would disappear if he made any sudden moves. Then, ever so slightly, his head leaned towards me. Feeling a surge of raging emotions, I closed my eyes in anticipation. I was aware of the immense heat wrapping about my body and making every nerve hyper-sensitive to every brush of skin against skin. It was like I was both completely within myself and yet in a completely different world. It was the most wonderful feeling I'd ever experiences. But the sudden joy and excitement I felt for finally being sure of Ronald Speirs' intentions toward me were wiped clean with one word spoken by a stranger.

"Ron?" I heard an unfamiliar woman's voice ring out behind us.

Speirs' POV

Staring into her eyes was at once exhilarating and utterly painful. In her eyes, I saw the man I could be with her. I saw the truth of what I'd left behind when I agreed to marry the widow I'd felt nothing for but pity. I'd felt obligated to make that woman my wife. Her late husband, who'd become my best friend in just a few short months, had entrusted me to protect her if something were to happen to him in the war. At the time, I'd had that confidence that plagues the minds of young men that nothing would ever happen to him. He would come through the war unscathed and my promise to him would be worth nothing. I'd known it in my heart until the day the telegram came.

Looking into Adelina's eyes was all I needed to spur that deep desire I felt for her on. A scalding warmth was flooding every sense. All I could see, hear, and feel was her. It made me forget about my wife, about the distance I'd tried to maintain between us, about my own unfaithfulness. I leaned forward and her eyes closed in anticipation. My heart was pounding in my ears. Just as I was about to crash my lips down on hers, I felt someone's presence behind us, but I didn't turn around. All that mattered was this beautiful creature before me.

"Ron?" The voice stunned me out of my thoughts and made me turn around so fast that I felt like my head was going to explode.

"Ron, what are you doing? I've been looking all over for you," my wife said in her sweetest voice possible. I knew she wasn't stupid. She had seen how close I was to kissing Adelina. She could see the guilt in my eyes as well as the desire. Her eyes moved from examining my face to Adelina's. Without thinking, I moved so that she was hidden behind me. My wife's eyes narrowed and her arms crossed over her chest.

"Well, Ron, whenever you're done running around, I'll be waiting for you at home."

"Ron?" The anger I was feeling that was being directed both at my wife and myself washed away when I looked at Adelina. The confusion and hurt burning in her eyes nearly brought me to my knees. Her face was covered in tears and she was staring adamantly at her hands.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't realize...I never would have..." Her eyes turned upwards toward me and I was knocked speechless. She thought this was all her fault. I brought a hand to her cheek, wiping the tears away as quickly as I could.

"Adelina, I..." For the first time in my life, I was at a loss for what to say to her and I hated myself for it. She didn't say anything either. But her eyes became very cold and calculating as she glanced back and forth between my wife and me. Her eyes widened and she smacked my hand away.

"I should have known," she said. Her voice pounded in my ears, cutting me through to my core.

"I'm so sorry, Lieutenant Speirs. I should be going." Then, before I knew it, she was gone. I stared after her, wondering how in the world things had turned to this.

I turned around and saw my wife standing there with a smug smile on her face. It melted from her face as my anger rose up again. My hands were shaking and I was trying very hard to keep them at my sides. I walked toward her.

"She's a good woman, Maria. This is my fault, not hers," I told her, my voice surprisingly steady. I walked off into the night towards our home, not caring where she went or what she did. As long as I wasn't near her, I didn't care at all.

Adelina's POV

I couldn't believe that I'd been so stupid about Speirs. He was married and I'd...God, I was _that _woman again. My thoughts flashed back to those nights spent with the German officer and I nearly fell to the ground.

I was ashamed with myself. If I'd just been a little bit more careful with my feelings, all of this could have been avoided.

"Adelina?" I tensed immediately in the middle of the cobblestone street. He couldn't see my like this. I shook my head and kept my head down.

"Dick, I...I'm just going home." I felt his presence grow nearer.

"Adelina, are you alright? What are you doing out here all by yourself?" His voice was etched with concern. I closed my eyes tightly, willing the tears to stop.

"I'm fine. I'm just..." He didn't allow me to finish. His arms wrapped around me and I felt my walls breaking as I breathed in his very distinct smell of freshly cut grass and sunshine.

"What's wrong, Adelina? You can tell me." I clung to him, feeling all of the emotion I'd kept at bay when I was with Speirs, raging upwards from the deepest caverns of my heart.

"Dick, I nearly just k-kissed Speirs." I felt Dick tense and I couldn't imagine why. I continued on as if I hadn't noticed.

"But I found out he's m-married. Dick, I've done a terrible thing and I..." He shushed me quietly and stroked my hair in a comforting gesture.

"You didn't know, Adelina."

"I _should_ have known. It's not as if this is the first time this has happened." I closed my eyes, melting into his embrace. Then, I realized my mistake. I clapped a hand over my mouth and tried to move away from him. He gripped my wrists, not allowing me to go. His icy blue eyes were burning with an intensity that had me gasping for air. I'd never seen Dick like this before.

"What are you talking about?" I shook my head, keeping my eyes focused on the ground.

"Adelina?" He coaxed my chin upwards. Looking into his glacial eyes, so full of understanding, made me want to tell him everything.

"Dick, I can't," I said, trying to fight the compulsion threatening to overwhelm me. He stared at me for a moment as if he were going to protest. Then, he heaved a sigh and nodded, his eyes shifting to the ground.

"Alright, I understand," he replied quietly. My eyes welled up suddenly from the quiet sincerity in his voice.

"Thank you," I whispered as the tears flowed afresh down my face. Dick glanced up at me in alarm and took me in his arms again without saying a word. He stroked my hair and I found myself leaning into his touch without having to think about it.

**I know it's been a while between updates, but I couldn't get this chapter exactly right until just now. Not to mention I was at my mom's house, where I don't have a computer all to myself. I know I'm just making excuses, but there you go. **

**I guess all I can really say now is commence the jealousy between two equally attractive men. I can't wait for the showdowns to start. And I'm sure you can't either. Oh and kudos to all the reviewers who have been suggesting this love triangle. Believe me when I say that it's going to become a lot more obvious in the next chapter. *evil laugh* Now, if you would please review if you have the time, it would be much appreciated. Love all of you~ber1719. :D**


	13. Chapter 13

_August 24, 1944_

Adelina's POV

"George, you're being ridiculous. You've let me sit on your lap every other time. Why not now?" I asked George. He had just sat down to a game of craps with Guarnere, Toye, Randleman, Buck, and Grant. He shrugged his shoulders and grinned at me knowingly.

"I think it might have to do with the fact that Lieutenant Speirs has been staring at you all night," he replied. I blanched immediately at his words. I looked over my shoulder to see that Ron was eying me intently.

"Has he been here the whole time?" I asked them. They nodded and laughed at the expression on my face.

"What's the matter, Adelina? We thought you were sweet on him," Martin said as he came to stand next to me. He threw an arm around my shoulder as I blushed.

"I am-I mean, I was..." my voice trailed off quietly. I saw them all exchange troubled glances. Martin's arm tightened around me.

"What's wrong, kiddo?" he asked, concern written all over his face.

"Did he do somethin' to you?" Guarnere demanded. He looked mutinous. The saying "if looks could kill..." ran through my mind. I smiled reassuringly at them.

"No, I think I'm tired is all," I told them, my mouth forming the words mechanically. I'd been saying the same thing to Nix and Dick for an entire month.

A month. That's how long it had been since I'd found out that Ron was a married man. I sighed internally before shaking my head of my thoughts.

"...you should get home and go to sleep. You look like you could use it," Martin was saying in my ear. The rest of the guys were nodding their agreement.

"Maybe I should go home," I muttered. Luz stood up and held out his arm for me.

"Need an escort?" he asked me with a cheeky grin. I shook my head.

"No, thank you, George. I think I can make it home on my own," I told him. I placed two hands on his shoulders and pushed him back into his chair. "Just kick their arses at craps, George. That's all I can ask." He flashed his smile once more before turning to the guys.

"You heard her, fellas. Let's play." I winked at him before waving at each of them.

"Night, guys," I said. A chorus of "good nights" rose up in the air behind me, making me smile.

It didn't take me long to get to the house I was staying at. The Harris house was only a street over from the pub. I ambled slowly down the cobbled streets. My eyes roved over the misty fields and the dark silhouettes of the horses galloping in their pens. It was calming and gave me the chance to think that the smoke-filled pub behind me could not. I leaned against a brick wall and sank slowly to the ground. The dirt beneath me was digging into the bare skin of my calves. But I couldn't find it in me to care. Ron's face was swimming in and out of my mind. I wanted to say that it had been easy to avoid and ignore him for the last month. But I couldn't deny that I'd been fighting minute after minute to stay out of his arms. I couldn't deny that what I thought might just be a simple school-girl attraction to the bad boy was something infinitely more complicated.

I laid my face in my hands for a second before turning my eyes back upwards to the sky. The clouds were drifting lazily across the inky black sky. The full moon shone brilliantly on the landscape at my feet. I could feel that sickening, overwhelming feeling of being close enough to that house that included so many horrible memories for me.

I recalled those nights when I would sit on the ledge of my bedroom window and gaze out at the night sky, which looked just like this. I could remember the burning urge in my fingertips to rip open the window and flee. Where I would go, I didn't know. I didn't care. As long as I could get away from my drunk of a father and my completely indifferent mother. But one thing, one person, would always stay my hand.

_Sarah. _

Her bright blue eyes, filled with laughter, were all that I could see. They way her tiny fingers would curl around my night dress as shouts and screams floated up to the top floor from the kitchen were all I could feel. The whimpers that woke me from my dreams night after night were all I could hear. All I could taste were the tears that streamed down my cheeks whenever I wished that I could take her away from the horror of our home. I could still smell the blood that my father drew every time he hit me for trying to talk sense into him.

"Please, please, go away," I moaned softly into my hands. I shut my eyes closed tightly and hoped for a second that I would die leaning against this cold brick wall. Then, dozens of faces appeared before my eyes. The men of Easy Company had become the family I'd never had. I loved them like I'd never learned to love my mother or my father. Slowly, they were filling the hole that my sister's death had left within me. Slowly, they were teaching me that being surrounded by people who you love and who love you can make the healing process begin.

"Adelina!" I heard Luz shouting down the road. I jumped up at the urgency in his voice. I ran over to him and grabbed his forearm.

"George, what's happened?" I asked, fear shooting through ever pore of my being. Relief overtook his expression for a second before it was replaced by uneasiness.

"It's Lieutenant Speirs, Adelina. He's been in a fight," he explained as he led me through the streets in the direction of the first aid station, three streets over from where we now were.

"You stupid Yanks and your need to display your amount of testosterone whenever you get the chance," I muttered under my breath. "How bad is it?" Luz's expression told me everything I needed to know. It was bad. I forced my legs to move faster.

"Who's with him?" I asked him, my voice little more than a whisper. Luz gripped my hand comfortingly.

"Nixon and Winters are with him right now. He wouldn't let anyone else in the room," Luz said with a slight smile. I scoffed.

"Still as stubborn as ever I see," I said as I returned the gesture with a crooked grin.

"Yeah. Winters sent me to find you. Figures you're the only one he'll see besides them," Luz offered. I nodded and turned my eyes towards the little white building looming ahead of us. I let go of Luz's hand and kissed me on the cheek.

"Thanks, George. You've been a real brick," I told him. I saw him blush slightly at the compliment.

"Just fix up Sparky, alright," Luz said and then took off back in the direction of the pub. I rolled my eyes. Men were so predictable. I faced the door of the first aid station again and rushed inside. Nixon was sitting in a chair facing me. He stood up at the sight of me and grinned slightly.

"Bout time you showed up. I'm not sure how long Dick is going to be able to last in there with him," he said with a short laugh.

"That isn't funny, Lew," I said, trying to hide my own tiny smile. Nixon glanced back at me with a knowing look in his eyes.

"Yeah, you don't think that's funny at all," he noted sarcastically. We were nearly half-way down the hall and I could already hear Ron's muffled shouts. I paused, not knowing whether or not to go in there. Nix turned around when I tugged on his hand.

"Nix, will you and Dick wait out here for me? I don't know if I'll be able to handle this alone," I asked him, my voice small even to my own ears. Nix gave my hand a swift squeeze.

"Sure we'll wait for you," he replied. I nodded and let him lead me the rest of the way down the corridor. He knocked twice on the door.

"Who is it?!" Ron yelled at us.

"It's Nixon with a present for you," Nix said before opening the door to reveal me standing behind him. I refused to meet his gaze as I walked slowly into the room.

"Come on, Dick. We've been assigned sentry duty," Nixon said with a smirk. I watched them go, feeling assured now that they would be just down the hall. The door closed and the room was filled with a plunging silence. I could feel him watching me, searching me for any betrayal of what I might be thinking. I sighed and looked up at him. I gasped slightly when I saw the blood running down his face from his nose. Without thinking, I ran forward and grabbed his chin.

"God, Ron, what happened to you?" I could tell that his nose was broken. I would have to set it in a few days after the swelling went down.

"Alright, your nose is broken, Ron. I'll get you some ice." I came back a few minutes later with some ice wrapped in a hand towel. I handed it to him.

"Here, hold this on your nose." I adjusted the pillows so that he could lean back against then and still keep his head elevated.

"Here, lay back and relax," I told him. He leaned back hesitantly. I saw him wince at the pain he'd been inflicted. I grabbed the rag he'd dropped and went to the sink. I soaked it with water and walked back to the bed. I sat down beside him and started to dab carefully at the mixture of dry and wet blood on his face.

"Can I ask what happened?"

"Some drunk infantry guy knocked over my beer," he replied. I looked up at him and giggled.

"And that's a perfectly good reason to start a fight, is it?" He pushed me away and swung his legs over the side of the bed. I hesitated for a moment, hurt by his sudden anger.

"Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"Excuse me? Dick wanted me to come so that I could help you. You were refusing to see anyone else."

"You're the last person I want to see," he said, his voice as icy as it had ever been.

"What?" He turned on me. He back me into the wall and looked me straight in the eyes.

"I've been trying not to think about you since I met you over two months ago. I'm married. I shouldn't want to be with anyone but my wife," he explained. The look in his eyes demanded that I not say a word until he was finished. "But I hate that woman. I made the biggest mistake of my life when I married her. And now I think that I'm falling in love with you." He dropped the ice and cupped either side of my face. I never though I would see the look in his eyes that I saw now:desperation for my understanding and fear of my rejection. I knew that I loved him too, but how could I know if he wasn't just using me for the same reasons as that German officer?

I wanted to pull away, but fear kept me in place. His eyes were expectant. I had to give him an answer.

"Ron, I..." I glanced at the ground and then back at him.

"I love you too," I whispered as tears fell down my cheeks. He brushed the salty liquid from my face.

"Don't cry," he muttered softly. He wrapped me in his arms and planted a kiss on my forehead. I shook harder with uncontrollable sobs.

"Ron, we can't be together." Ron smoothed the hair from my face.

"We can be together. Maybe not now, but after the war. I can't divorce my wife, but I will. I promise you I will," he told me comfortingly. I sobbed harder, wishing that it could be true.

"Ron, you don't understand," I said. He pulled away from me.

"Then help me understand," he said, his voice almost pleading. I shook my head and slipped from out of his grasp.

"I love you, Ron, but I can't do this. I'm sorry," I said before I rushed from the room. I fled down the hallway and out the front door past Dick. So Nixon had left Dick behind to comfort me. He caught up with me not long afterwards and wrapped me in his arms. I clung to him like a small child.

"Dick, don't leave me alone. I need you," I muttered, my voice low and hoarse from crying.

"I won't leave you," he replied in a whisper. He swept me up into his arms and carried me bridal-style towards the house he was boarded in. The smooth rhythm of his footsteps and the sounds of crickets chirping was putting me to sleep after only a few minutes. My forehead had fallen against his shoulder, so I leaned back slightly to see his face. He was smiling down at me with nothing but understanding and care in his eyes.

"Thank you, Dick."

"You're welcome, Adelina," he said and placed a kiss on my forehead. I smiled slightly and let my head fall back against his shoulder. Within seconds, I was asleep.

**Finally! They confess to each other that they're in love. Too bad both Adelina and Ron are being kept apart by a certain annoying wife! And for you Adelina/Dick shippers, I put in a little sweet moment between them again. Hehe, I actually had a lot planned for this chapter. **

**In one plan, I had Adelina and Dick lemon. Then I had another one with Ron and Adelina lemon. Then I had one with Adelina killing herself because she just can't deal with the hotness that describes those too men. No just kidding. More on the way. I just hope it doesn't take as long to come up with something. Although, I do have something very exciting planned for the next one. Yay!**

**And before I forget, I would like to make a special mention to my reviewers of last chapter. They made me so proud by breakin my all-time high of 4 reviews for a chapter. I got 5! What then? Okay, so thank you sezq, captain ty, PaperHeart382, iHedge, and Iloveboyswhosparkle. Thanks a lot guys and sorry sezq for not putting in "cad" like I had planned. Darn it. Oh well. Next time I promise lol. **

**Okay, one last thing I promise. I have a new poll up on my profile for this story. Please check it out, but only if you want to. Thanks a lot!**


	14. Chapter 14

Dick's POV

When we finally made it home, I opened the front door and crept silently up the stairs to my bedroom on the second story. My heart was pounding in my ears as I tried unsuccessfully to forget about who was cradled in my arms. I slipped into my bedroom and closed the door behind us with the tip of my shoe. Her face was turned into my shoulder. Her sweet breath was blowing in waves on the bare skin of my neck. It sent my blood boiling and I made it a necessity to put as much distance as possible between us before I did something irreparable.

Even as I lay her down on the queen-sized bed in the middle of the room, my fingers burned for the feel of her in my embrace once again. I hesitated a moment while I leaned over her. She seemed so innocent and care-free when she was sleeping. I could see none of the burdens she was enduring in the steady rise and fall of her chest and her slightly opened pink lips. I realized suddenly that I had cupped her cheek. Her pale skin was rough to the touch from the stains of the many tears she'd cried for Speirs.

I clenched my fists at the anger rising within me at the thought of him hurting her. Jealousy set fire to my veins.

"_Dick, I nearly just k-kissed Speirs." _

When those words left her lips and my insides knotted painfully around themselves at the image of her kissing him, I knew that I felt more for her than I had let myself believe. I knew that all my attempts to put the men before my own personal happiness had failed miserably.

I pulled away from her suddenly when she began to stir. Her eyes flew open when I did and she grabbed my hand. I stared at her, unsure of what she might do. She was vulnerable and I couldn't trust myself to deny her what she wanted.

"Don't leave me alone," she said in a small voice. That simple command was enough to break down my walls. I nodded slowly.

"Alright, just let me get undressed," I said without thinking. She pulled her hands away and looked down at her lap. I realized too late what I'd said. My ears and cheeks were set alight.

"Oh God. I just meant...I didn't mean to say it like that," I struggled to explain. She glanced up at me again and sent me an understanding smile.

"It's okay, Dick. I know you'd never do anything like that," she muttered. I turned away from her, guilt filling ever pore of my being. She had no idea about my feelings toward her. And I was about to climb into bed with her with no clue as to how I might react. I sighed, knowing that I'd gotten this far. I could do this. Besides, she needed me and I wanted to be the one to comfort her after he'd broken her heart. I kicked off my boots and then shrugged my pants off before throwing on my PT shorts.

I was aware of her eyes pressing into the back of my head. It was now or never and I knew that if I didn't do it soon, I'd lose my nerve. I sighed and faced her. Her eyes were shining in the darkness and I felt my legs being pulled forward by them. I climbed gently into the bed and laid down, not sure what she would do. Immediately, she snuggled closer and laid her head on my chest. It felt like my heart was ready to jump out of my body at the small amount of contact.

Deciding to push my limits, I draped my arm around her waist and pulled her closer. Her small breasts touched my chest and I gasped softly. She was driving me crazy and she wasn't even doing it on purpose. I realized that feeling her delicate, feminine form against mine was the single most erotic feeling I'd ever experienced. I opened my eyes and saw that she was smiling up at me contentedly. I returned the gesture and brushed her hair out of her face.

"Go to sleep, Adelina," I whispered softly in her ear. I felt her shiver and felt elated at the reaction. Her fingers closed around the front of my shirt as she closed her eyes. I continued to stroke her hair, hoping that it would put her to sleep. After a few minutes, I could hear her breathing steady and then her body went limp in my arms. I kissed her forehead, leaning back only to toss an agonized whisper into the darkness.

"I love you."

Adelina's POV

I woke up to the sound of raised voices nearby. I recognized them immediately as Dick and Lew.

"What the hell were you thinking, Dick?"

"I wasn't really."

"Yeah, I should say so. Do you have a death wish?"

"No, God. You know what, that idiot broke her heart. And she ran to me. What was I supposed to do? What would you have done?" The sound of Nixon's sigh filled the room.

"Dick, I would've stayed in a chair by the bed. It's called boundaries and if Speirs finds out that you've crossed that particular one, he'll kill you."

"You're implying that I slept with her." The way Dick said it made it into a statement, not a question.

"Well, what would you think if you were me?"

"Lew, I love her, I wouldn't do that to her." My pulse resounded in my chest. Dick was in love with me? I couldn't help but feel like I'd made a huge mistake forcing him to stay with me last night.

"You love her? When the hell did that happen?"

"I don't know. It just did alright? And last night, she was so upset. I couldn't find it in me to tell her no."

A profound silence filled the air and echoed in my ears.

"Christ, Dick. I had no idea. What are you gonna do?"

"Nothing. I can't do anything. Not while she's still so distraught about Speirs. Besides, I have the men to think about." I decided that now was the time to interrupt their conversation. I'd heard enough to keep me thinking for the next few days on what I would do next. I couldn't keep running to Dick whenever I had a problem. Not now that I knew that he was in love with me. I sat up in bed with a large sigh and stretched. Having had years of practice with acting, I turned two round, surprised eyes on Nixon and Dick.

"Is everything alright?" I asked them, my voice dripping with false concern. When their frowns turned into smiles, I knew I wasn't the only one in the room who was a good actor.

"No, Adelina, nothing's wrong. Just surprised to see you here in Dick's room," Nix explained with a flip of his hand. I nodded and pulled my knees up to my chest.

"Oh. I was feeling a bit upset last night, so I asked Dick if he would let me sleep here. Being the gentleman that he is, he agreed." Nixon nodded as if it was the first time he'd heard the story.

"Yeah, he's a gentleman alright," I noticed the sarcasm in his tone. How had I not noticed it before? Nix was shifting his weight from foot to foot as he shot furtive glances between the two of us.

"He is," I said defensively. I mentally kicked myself. Something in Nixon's eyes betrayed the fact that he'd heard the way I jumped to Dick's defense.

"Well, I came here to tell Mr. Knight in Shining Armor that Sink wants him at HQ by 0930. He said he wants you there too, Adelina," Nixon said, turning to matters of the army to keep things at arms length for now. He obviously didn't want Dick involved with this sick love triangle that was threatening to form. Or was it just that he didn't want Dick to be with me? I shook my head. I couldn't think about this right now. I had a meeting to get ready for.

"What time is it now?" Dick locked eyes with me before glancing down at his watch. My heart strings stretched painfully. How long had he been suffering through his feelings for me in silence? How long had he longed to hold me in his arms like he had last night?

"It's 0830 now. Do you want me to walk you over to the Harris'?" Dick asked me in that quiet voice of his. Nix stepped forward a little and glanced back at Dick.

"I could take her. It's on the way anyway," he said. It was obvious that he wanted to get me alone so that he could talk to me. I didn't know if I was ready for that, but I couldn't think of a good enough excuse not to go with him.

"Okay, if that's alright with Adelina, then I don't see why not," Dick allowed, though I could see the yearning in his icy blue orbs.

"Yeah sure, I'm always up for a stroll with our ever-charming intelligence officer." I slipped out from beneath the covers and put on my flats. Nixon walked over to the door and waited with irritation as I went over to Dick. I laid a hand on his arm and reached up to kiss his cheek. I pulled away, my cheeks on fire. I wasn't sure if doing that would make things worse or better, but it was too late to consider that now.

"Thank you again for last night, Dick." Before he could reply, I swept out of the room. I followed Nixon downstairs and out the front door silently. We walked a short ways down the road, the silence filling ever available space between us. I turned to him, not caring how stupid I would look to him.

"Lew, I'm not going to hurt him." He turned his dark eyes on me. I could see the poorly hidden mirth smiling at me behind his frown.

"So you were awake through that whole thing?"

"No, not the whole thing. But I think I heard enough," I answered, careful to keep the accusations out of my tone. Nixon nodded and continued down the road as if I hadn't spoken in the first place.

"So you know how he feels about you, then?"

"Yes," I said, emotion making my voice crack slightly.

"Well, I don't know if he really is in love with you, Adelina. But I want you to promise me that you'll let him down easy, alright."

"Nix, I'm not going to hurt him, for the last time. You can stop worrying, okay?" I knew that I was

overly sensitive about this. Lew just wanted to keep his friend from getting hurt.

"You're right. Sorry, I know you wouldn't do that to him." I sighed heavily.

"Lew, I don't know what to do," I admitted, my voice unsteady. Nixon threw an arm around my shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze.

"I don't know either, kid. Only time will tell," he told me. He stopped walking and I looked up at him questioningly. He jerked his head to my right. I saw that we'd gotten to my stop, so I chuckled.

"I was so engrossed by our conversation. I didn't realize we were so close already," I said, my cheeks growing pink from being so preoccupied. Nixon waved a hand at me dismissively.

"Time flies when you're having fun," he said with a smirk. I kissed him on the cheek and walked up the stone pathway towards the front door of the Harris house. I grabbed the doorknob and turn around with a cheeky smile on my face.

"What makes you think I was having fun?" His nose crinkled as he set a hand over his heart.

"You wound me," he said, pretending to be mortally offended by my question. I waved him off, laughing behind my hand.

"You'll get over it," I told him reassuringly. He nodded and started to walk away. A sudden thought occurred to me while I watched him go.

"Oh, Nix, are you going to be at the meeting later?" He threw a wink over his shoulder.

"You betcha."

"See you then."

"Bye, Adelina." I unlocked the door and slipped inside the house. I knew that both Mr. and Mrs. Harris would be awake and in the kitchen. I crept by the kitchen doorway as quietly as I could. I caught a quick glimpse of Mrs. Harris pouring them both a cup of tea before I bounded up the stairs.

***

I was standing outside HQ, wondering if I should go in now or not. It had taken me twenty minutes to get dressed, do my hair, and walk here. Deciding to throw caution to the winds, I wandered away from the quiet building. The time to think had arrived and I knew that I would need every avaliable second to figure out what I was going to do now.

Walking around Aldbourne was much more different in the day time than in the evening. The sun was drifting in a lazy pattern in and out of the cover of the white clouds. The people of the town were drifting down the streets with variously sized packages draped under their arms. I smiled warmly at all of them and received the gesture many times over.

If things had turned out differently, I wondered whether I would be as indifferent as these people. Would I have stayed at home for Sarah even after I was free to make my own decisions? I reasoned that I probably would have. Sarah was the most important thing in my life because she was the only one worthy of such feelings. If I could have taken her away from that broken household, perhaps I could have saved both of us. If I'd been just a bit braver, I would have taken her away to our grandparents house. Before memories of happier days flowed through my imagination, I shook my head. Now was not the time for reminiscing. I looked around me again and frowned.

Here, I could pretend that everything I'd seen during the war was just a horrible dream. I almost wished that I could stay here forever. But I knew that it wasn't meant to be. Our time here would be short-lived and in a few days, weeks, or months, the inevitable would happen. I only hoped that I would be going with Easy when they left.

My insides gave an uncomfortable flop. I'd never really thought about what would become of me now that we were back in England. Surely if I was being transferred again, I would have been off by now. A spark of hope lit within me. It was small, minuscule even, but it was enough to have me smiling again.

A sigh of relief wrapped around me as I made my way back to Battalion Headquarters. When I was approaching it, I saw Lieutenant Speirs walking out the front door. My heart seemed to stop. I closed my eyes for a moment, hoping that he wouldn't notice me. He looked angry, no more so than usual. But, as his eyes scanned over the throng of people and settled on me, his eyes burned suddenly with an intense hatred.

I knew then that he despised me now even more than he claimed to despise his wife. He turned away from me and disappeared into the crowd of people moving along the street. I realized that I'd been holding my breath. I let it out quickly and sucked in another mouthful of air. Seeing him again was unexpected and only drove the wedge further into my heart.

Why did he have to be married? Why did I have to fall in love with someone whose very soul was a contradiction? My thoughts turned to Winters and I felt a surge of self-hatred rise through me.

I knew that even with me pretending to be none the wiser, things were beginning to change between Dick and I already. Seeing again that intense stare before my eyes, I wanted nothing more than to retreat into the safety of Dick's arms. I wanted nothing more than for him to take away the pain and the memories. But I couldn't. I would have to suffer in silence and deal with my own problems alone. I cringed at the though, but kept my head held high as I reached the door to HQ. I gripped the doorknob in my palm and twisted it, feeling in my heart that something big was about to happen.

**And there is Chapter 14! This took a while to cook up and I really did put a ton of thought into it, even if it doesn't really seem like it. No kissing as I promised Iloveboyswhosparkle would be happening very soon, but lots of angst. And lots of time to think for both Dick and Adelina. **

**I'm sorry if sometimes it seems to be moving at a snail's pace, but I like to think that even though my chapters usually include events that happen within a very short time period, I am still progressing the plot very well. Please tell me if I'm not. I'd hate to waste all this time and then have you guys absolutely hate me for it. **

**Okay, time for the thank yous. Thank you so much to everyone who has been adding me to their favorites lists and alerts. I really appreciate it even though I don't say it enough. I also would like to thank the reviewers of last chapter: captain ty, Iloveboyswhosparkle, PaperHeart382, and wild-in-spirit. I love you guys so much and you really kept me going. Especially captain ty and Iloveboyswhosparkle who demanded that I get this chapter out asap! Just kidding I love you guys. Anyways, so yeah that's about it. Oh, and thank you to everyone who's voted in the poll so far. If you haven't yet, go to my profile. It's conveniently located at the top of the page for your voting pleasure. **


	15. Chapter 15

Adelina's POV

My heart was going a mile a minute, as was my leg, while Colonel Sink surveyed me carefully with those gray eyes of his. His mustache twitched when he met my anxious stare once again.

"Miss Jones, there's no need to look so scared," he said gently. I wouldn't have thought it possible. I'd heard from many of the Easy guys that Colonel Sink was a complete arse to everyone.

"_I heard he yelled so much at some poor recruit that they had to send him back to England," George had told her one evening during cards. _

"_You should have seen Colonel Sink when all of us turned in our resignations. He looked like he would kill ya as soon as look atcha," Guarnere had told me once during a conversation about Easy's horrible first CO Herbert Sobel. _

"I'm sorry," I muttered, my eyes turning instinctively to my lap, "I guess I just thought you'd be a lot more..."

"Of a hard ass?" Sink asked with a cheeky smile. I nodded.

"Yes, sir," I confirmed. He opened his mouth, probably to toss me another smart comment when someone knocked on the door of his office.

"Enter," he called. I turned my eyes to the door and caught the sight of Dick's face. I turned a deep red and faced the desk again. Luckily, Sink was too busy shuffling papers around to notice. Nixon's laughter filled my ears and I smiled at him as he took the chair on my left. Dick, as quiet as usual, sat down in the chair to my right. I could tell that he was trying to catch my eye, but I adamantly refused to meet his accusing gaze.

"Morning Nixon, Winters," he said, greeting them both with a nod of his head.

"Morning, sir," they chimed. Colonel Sink regarded each of us carefully and then folded his hands on top of his desk.

"Now, I don't like to tip-toe around things. You both should know that," he said, looking pointedly at the men, "So, I'll get right down to it." He paused to take a breath. A heart beat passed and then he was talking again.

"I've been in touch with Captain Kenneth Fields, Miss Jones. He spoke very highly of you during our correspondence," Sink informed me. A wave of gratitude washed through me.

"Now, I spoke to him about the amount of action you'd seen while you were attached to the 2nd Waffen-SS division under Fleischer?" Sink said, shuffling through papers to get the name. I nodded, feeling a chill run up my spine. Hearing his name, even now, had the most profound effect on my nerves. All of a sudden, I felt wired and ready to fight off an invisible enemy. Would it ever end? Would I ever be able to hear his name and not react like this? I realized that Colonel Sink was talking to me and tried to focus on his face.

"Miss Jones, are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine," I said, though I knew my smile didn't meet my eyes. I saw Lew and Dick's heads turn towards me. I shook my head gently, a silent plea for them not to ask anything of it until later.

"Well, I've been thinking that with your combat history is exceptional and I believe that you'd made an excellent addition to the 506th," said Sink.

"And you'd have your pick of the crop," he concluded.

"With all due respect, sir, I think I'd like to stay with Easy. Over the past few months, they've become like family to me. I couldn't leave them now," I said, meaning every word. Sink regarded me for a moment before grabbing a pen and uncapping it.

"It's settled then, you're being transferred to Easy Company. I just have to approve this and send it to Captain Fields." I looked at him, astonished that after so much worry, I would be staying with the men I'd come to love more than my own family.

"Is that it?" I asked, gobsmacked that it had been so simple. Sink merely nodded. He finished signing the paper and stood up to see us out of his office. Overcome with a joy I couldn't contain, I jumped up and hugged Colonel Sink with a huge grin on my face. Over his shoulder, I could see Nix laughing uncontrollably behind his hand. I pulled away, embarrassment and fear of being reprimanded made my cheeks turned a sickening shade of red. Sink took one look at me and burst out laughing.

"I haven't been hugged like _that _in a very long time," he chuckled while I flushed even more.

"Do me a favor Dick, and keep this one under lock and key. With that level of enthusiasm, she's bound to find trouble." Little did he know, I'd already found some. And the heap was about a mile high.

***

_September 13,1944_

I was sitting with Webster, watching the dart game going on between Buck, Toye, Heffron, and Luz. I smiled warmly at Buck as he passed a wink over his shoulder at me. I saw him switch the dart from his right hand to his left hand. He threw it at the board and hit the black part.

"Aw, come on, Buck," I groaned in mock exasperation. He turned his eyes on me for a second before looking back at the guys.

"Alright, finish me up," Buck said as Heffron stepped forward for his turn. Heffron tossed his dart

got a double seven.

"He's showing you up, Buck," I said with a wink in Heffron's direction. I was happy the boys were getting along with the red-haired replacement from Philadelphia. He seemed like a nice enough guy. Heffron took a quick swig of his beer and then went back to play darts. Guarnere walked over to the table that Babe had been sitting at and took his seat.

"Hey fellas, whatdya hear whatdya say?"

"Actually that's Babe's seat. Private Heffron's," said one of the replacements, Hashey. Guarnere smirked a little.

"That right? I don't care if it's fuckin' Eisenhower's," he replied. I giggled behind my hand, receiving several glares from the new recruits. Guarnere's eyes darkened slightly and he gestured toward me.

"Anyone a youse been introduced to our girl yet?" he asked them, his voice betraying only a sliver of his anger. The three replacements shook their heads.

"Well, then I'm gonna educate ya," Bill said.

"That is Adelina Jones, one of our medics. She's probably the bravest woman I've ever known and if you can't respect her, then youse gotta answer to me, alright?" His voice was fierce, and they could tell that he wasn't kidding around.

"Yes, sir, sorry," they all muttered softly. I flashed him a small smile.

"Thanks, Bill."

"Don't mention it." My attention was drawn from Guarnere to Smokey.

"Hey ya'll. Listen up. I got an announcement to make," he called out to the room. Everyone gathered a little closer to hear him. He grabbed Lipton from behind and made him face all of us.

"This here's Carwood Lipton-," he started.

"He's already married, Smokey," Malarkey said with a chuckle. A smatter of laughing lifted in the air and then fell.

"This here is Carwood Lipton, the new Easy Company first sergeant!" Lip smiled shyly as we all applauded. Several men whistled.

"Congratulations, Lip!" I shouted from my seat. A few guys lifted up their glasses. Smokey raised his hand for silence.

"He says he has to make an announcement," Smokey told us. I could see the sadness in Lipton's eyes as he addressed us.

"Sorry to break the mood here, but uh, we're moving out again," he said and then walked away. I felt a knot forming in the pit of my stomach. My chest tightened as I glanced at each of their faces. A profound silence had filled the pub to replace the sound of glasses clinking together and laughter. I shook my head and stood up. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach and I couldn't explain why. I'd been in battle before. I knew what to expect. So why was I so scared now? I could feel tears stinging the backs of my eyes. I kissed Webster quickly on the cheek.

"Thanks for keeping me company, Web," I muttered, my voice thick with emotion. He turned his curious blue orbs on me, but said nothing about my watery eyes.

"It was no problem." I nodded quickly and stole off through the crowd. I could hear someone laughing in the background of my mind. At least one of them was able to remain untouched by the news that we were going to the front again.

The crisp, fall air bit ruthlessly at my exposed skin. The frosty wind blew silently through the trees, sending shivers down my back. But I knew that the coldness I now felt was not just from the temperature outside. An inexplainable terror was eating away at the dregs of my heart. I'd never felt this scared in my entire life. And as much as I had promised myself that I would stay away from Dick, I found my legs moving in the direction of his boarding house. I could see that his bedroom light was on, and I decided to chance it by throwing a rock at his window. I picked one up off the ground and threw just hard enough to hit the glass. After the crack resounded through the air, I saw a shadow move. His face appeared, instantly chasing away all my fears. He opened the window slightly.

"Adelina? What are you doing?"

"Dick, could I come up?" He seemed to consider it for a moment, but then nodded.

"I'll be down in a minute." He closed the window and disappeared. I could feel my face heating up. What was I going to do now? Would he let me stay the night? The thought of being alone tonight was nearly unbearable.

_But is it just that I don't want to be alone? _This voice had been popping up in my head more often than usual lately, especially where Dick was concerned. It was the voice of doubt, of reason. I knew that slowly, but surely, I was getting over Speirs. He would always have a place in my heart, but I realized that I couldn't be with him and I wasn't willing to gamble away a happy life on the chance that he would leave his wife after the war. Besides that, I owed him nothing. I'd made no promises to him that I would wait for him. And I couldn't forget the fact that he had lied to me. A small part of me was still holding on to the hope that it could still work out between us. But the much larger part, the part that seemed to be winning, wanted to move on.

I heard a door open somewhere nearby and I rushed toward Dick. I felt a strange twinge deep inside when I noticed the way his voice wrapped subtly around my name. A small flicker of heat rose within me. It ran through my system, warming everything in it's path. And when I finally found his fingers in the darkness, I knew that something about him just set everything right for me. I was shocked at the strength of my conviction, but I chose not to hold back from him anymore.

I realized then why moving out had created so much fear for me. For nearly five years, I'd lived without love in my heart. Now that I was with Easy, I knew that the void left by my sister's passing had filled. And I was terrified that one of them would be killed. In England, it'd been as simple as breathing to place the possibility of one of them being killed to the back of my mind. Now, I had to face it head on. I couldn't help but want to stretch my happiness for at least one more night.

"Adelina, what's wrong?" Dick asked me. Gingerly, he cupped my cheek. His thumb rolled across my skin. My heart was pounding and I couldn't say exactly why. His touch was wiping my mind of all thoughts. I smiled and stared into my eyes.

"Nothing now that you're here," I replied, my voice drawing him closer. He nodded, his eyes betraying his happiness from hearing my words. I knew that I couldn't tell him my true feelings. I didn't feel like now was the right time. Tonight, I just wanted to be in his arms.

He led me quietly up to his bedroom and closed the door behind us. I could see that he'd been packing. The room was barren except for the bed and his gear, which he'd stuffed into a corner. I turned around to see that he was staring at me. His icy blue eyes were boring into my own. I noticed a small radio in the corner of the room. It was emitting a soft, slow jazzy tune. I sent him a shy smile and then walked over to it. I twisted the volume knob so that the music floated in a constant rhythm all around us.

_I love you for sentimental reasons_

_I hope you do believe me_

_I'll give you my heart_

_I love you and you alone were meant for me_

_Please give your loving heart to me_

_And say we'll never part_

I turned around and shyly approached him, more unsure of myself now than I'd ever been in my life. Keeping my eyes glued to his, I groped the air for his fingers. When I found them, I entwined our left hands and went to lift his right to my waist. His palm inched its way forward on its own and wound around me. He pulled me close as he began to sway. I smiled as he took the lead. I was lost in his embrace and was startled when I could hear a voice, much more different than the one being emitted from the radio, but infinitely more beautiful.

"I think of you every morning

Dream of you every night

Darling I'm never lonely

Whenever you are in sight

I love you for sentimental reasons

I hope you do believe me

I've given you my heart," Dick sang along to the soft tune. My heart swelled and my eyes filled with tears. I broke away from him and wiped away my tears.

"Oh Dick! Why do you have to make this so damn difficult?" I asked him in the hope that by saying something I would stop the pounding of my heart. Dick stared at me, shocked by my outburst.

"What do you mean? What did I do?" The hurt in his eyes made me start forward. I stopped just inches from him. The moments stretched into minutes and the minutes drew into what felt like eternity. Feeling that I could stand it no longer, I reached forward and brushed my lips against his.

"You're making it so difficult not to fall in love with you," I whispered when I was finally able to pull away.

**Trust me, I wasn't expecting that either. Please review, even if it's only to tell me how much you hate my guts b/c I ruined your hopes for a Speirs/Adelina relationship. Just remember there's lots more drama to come. **

**I noticed I haven't put a disclaimer in any of these chapters, which I feel really bad about. So, for this chapter and the rest of them, I only own Adelina and any original plot twists. This story is not intended in any way to insult those men who fought so bravely for their country as a part of Easy Company. I also do not own the song, "I love you for sentimental reasons" featured in this chapter. It's a really wonderful song if you ever have the time to look it up. The version I used is by Nat King Cole. ;)**


	16. Chapter 16

Adelina's POV

"You're making it so difficult not to fall in love with you," I whispered when I was finally able to pull away. I took one look at the expression on Dick's face and knew that it had gone all wrong. I clapped a hand over my mouth.

"What's the matter?" I asked him. I wanted to smack myself. I should have known that kissing him was a really bad idea. He stared at me with a mixture of confusion and hesitancy. He turned away from me and went to stand at the window.

"Adelina, what are you doing?" My eyebrows scrunched together. My knees were shaking and I sank onto his bed.

"I...I'm sorry, I just-," I stammered, finding that I didn't quite know what I'd been doing. Dick sighed heavily.

"I think you should go home," he said, his voice so quiet I had a hard time believing he'd said it.

"What? Why?" My lip was quivering and I wondered how my heart was beating so fast. Dick turned around.

"Adelina, did you hear what I said to Nixon?"

"What in the hell does that have to do with anything?" Dick's cheeks caught fire and he looked at me with a Speirs-like intensity that I found terrifying.

"Adelina, please, answer the question." I opened my mouth, intending to say one thing, before confirming his suspicions. He nodded his head, a thoughtful look in his eyes.

"Why did you kiss me? Was it to get over Speirs or do you really feel something for me?"

My mind went blank in response. I couldn't believe that he was questioning my motives.

"How could you ask me that, Dick?" I said, my voice rising in volume.

"It just seems strange that you would all of a sudden kiss me," he replied. My eyes narrowed into a glare and my insides writhed in anger. I marched toward the door and gripped the handle. If he wanted to act that way, then fine.

"I'll show myself out then," I muttered before opening the door and closing it behind me.

***

For the next few weeks, I busied myself with taking an inventory of 2nd Battalion's medical supplies. It was a job that Colonel Sink had been only too eager to give me. Just as I'd hoped, counting tourniquets took up most of my time during the day, thus distracting me from thinking about either Ron or Dick. I woke up, went straight to work, and went to bed immediately afterwards. Sometimes, I would be so tired that I'd just find a spare bed in the medical tent and sleep there. It was a blissful two weeks and by the time I was done with the inventory, I felt much better about the love triangle I found myself in.

I focused slowly on Dick's voice. He was standing at the front, briefing us about our next jump.

"As you can see, this is called Operation Market Garden. In terms of Airborne's involved, this one's even bigger than Normandy," Winters was saying as he stood in front of all of us. I tried to ignore the racing of my heart as his eyes settled on me for a fraction of a second longer than they should have.

"We're dropping deep into occupied Holland. The allied objective is to take this road here between Eindhoven and Arnhem. So the two British Armored divisions can move up and toward Arnhem. Our job is gonna be to liberate Eindhoven. Stay there. Wait for the tanks," he continued. I looked quietly at the men around me. Guarnere smiled grimly at me and grabbed my hand.

"You okay?" he asked in a whisper. I leaned against his shoulder for a moment.

"I'm fine. This is old hat to me," I said with an air of fake superiority. He chuckled lightly at me.

"Yeah, you must have loads of experience with jumping outta airplanes." I shook my head and smiled.

"Not really, Bill. That's why I've got you to explain every last detail to me," I said. He winked at me before turning his attention back to the front. Nixon was talking now.

"Entire European advance has been put on hold to allocate resources for this operation. It's Montgomery's personal plan. We'll be under British command," Nixon said. Guarnere rolled his eyes a little bit and glared at me. I raised my hands in surrender.

"Do I look like a Brit to you?" I asked him. He smirked and ruffled my hair.

"You sound like one, babe," Heffron said as he leaned around Perco to talk to us.

"Good news is, if this works, the tanks will be over the Rhine and into Germany. That could end the war and get us home by Christmas. It'll be a day time jump. Intelligence doesn't expect much opposition. They think the Krauts in Holland are mostly kids and old men. And we should take them by surprise.

"In any case, say goodbye to England. I don't think they're gonna call this one off," Nixon concluded. We all gave a little groan, each of us mentally preparing for the death and destruction that lay in our future.

***

"Is all this really necessary?" I asked in annoyance as Lipton strapped yet another thing to the gear belt on my hip. Everyone around me nodded. Guarnere smirked at me.

"Thought this was old hat to ya, kiddo." I glared at him as I shifted my weight from one foot to the other.

"Shut it, Gonorrhea," I said, loud enough for him to hear me. Lipton snorted, covering it up quickly as a coughing spasm.

"Just be happy they aren't strapping that lovely 80-pound bag to your leg like they did to us in Normandy," he said when he'd finally recovered. He slid my medical bag over my head and stood back to admire his work.

"Hell, Adelina, ya look good even with all that weight you put on," Bill said. I looked at Bull, who smiled at me knowingly.

"Bull, smack him for me." I grinned when I heard Guarnere's resounding yelp as Bull followed my order. I watched as Martin pointed to something behind me. I turned around with Bull to see that Garcia, one of the new replacements, was looking slightly unsure of himself with his rifle. I thanked God that I didn't have to carry one of those. Both Dick and Lew had insisted on me carrying a pistol, which was bad enough. Bull went over to help Garcia. Once he had the rifle in his hands, however, he was distracted by the honking of an incoming vehicle. I followed his line of sight and saw someone that I didn't expect. My first Easy patient, Popeye Wynn, was standing on the back of a jeep as it drove down the road.

"No fucking way," Guarnere muttered as he looked at the jeep too. I walked up next to him.

"What is it? I would have thought you lot'd be happy to see Popeye," I said. Martin shook his head and pointed at the man in the passenger seat.

"See him?" he asked me, still pointing. He was tall, probably the same height as Dick. He had jet black hair and piercing eyes. He looked even scarier than Speirs. I gasped slightly.

"That's not-," I said. Guarnere and Martin nodded.

"Yeah, that's him," they said in unison. I shook my head. If the stories hadn't been enough, the glares they were shooting at him were. Easy Company loathed their first CO. As the jeep came to a stop, Lipton approached it, making sure to time his steps so that he wouldn't have to talk to Sobel at all. I followed him, eager to see Popeye again. Lipton smiled up at his friend and helped him down.

"They let you out of the hospital like that, boy?" he asked. Popeye shook his head.

"Nope, I busted out," he replied with a boyish grin. He did a double take when he caught sight of me.

"Are you with Easy now?" I nodded proudly as I pointed to the Airborne patch on my arm.

"I sure am, Popeye," I said and quickly leaned forward to give him a hug, "It's good to see you again."

"You too," he said, clearly meaning every word.

"So you busted out of the hospital?"

"I didn't wanna get reassigned to some other unit," Popeye said, his voice only slightly defensive. I nodded and then pointed over my shoulder to the guys.

"I'll see you boys later. Thanks again for helping me Lipton," I said.

"No problem," he said quickly and then turned back to his friend. I giggled behind my hand. It was in these moments that I realized why I loved Easy Company so much. Even with a wounded arse, Popeye had still wanted to come back to Easy if only to be thrown straight into a plain to jump into Holland. I admired every man in the company, my company. I found it hard to breathe whenever I realized that I was now part of this outstanding group of soldiers.

"You ready?" Bull asked from behind me. I turned around and smiled at him.

"Of course. I've never been more ready for anything," I told him reassuringly.

***

"Stand up," Dick was yelling at the front of the plane. He made a motion with his hand above his head.

"Hook up."

"Sound off," he finished at last. My heart was pounding now that we were up in the air with the prospect of being hurled into the air at unimaginable speeds just moments away. Dick caught my eye and gave me a small smile. I tried to return the gesture, but all I could manage was a sickening grimace. I allowed myself a second to consider what he might be thinking about. We hadn't spoken at all since the scene in his bedroom. I could feel my cheeks fill with heat just from the thought of it.

"Are you ready now?" Bull asked me as he checked my equipment. I shook my head without hesitation.

"No and I feel like I might puke," I told him, trying to keep my last meal in my stomach. Bull clapped me on the shoulder in what I assumed to be a comforting gesture.

"Four okay!" he yelled in my ear. I rolled my eyes and shot him a glare over my shoulder. I checked Webster's gear, not really caring that I was touching his bottom.

"Three okay!" I gulped, feeling sick at heart. Why had I agreed to this? Why couldn't I have stayed in England when I had the chance?

I was shaky at the knees by the time Dick was stationed in the doorway to jump into the air. He looked back at me one last time.

"Be careful, please," I mouthed at him, knowing he would get the gist of what I was saying. All he gave me was a smile before he jumped out of the airplane. I quelled the urge to vomit on Webster as the line moved forward. I was so nervous that my nails were digging into the palms of my hands. I could feel something warm flowing down my fingers and realized that I had drawn blood. I took a deep breath and shook my head to clear it.

Then I was standing there, facing the dotted horizon. All around, I could see thousands of paratroopers floating toward the ground. I became aware of the guys yelling at me to just do it and get it over with. As if in slow motion, I took a deep breath and rushed out into the roaring wind. My last coherent thought before I began to plunge to the ground was, "I'm going to die."

I opened my eyes slowly when I felt the parachute open and jerk me upwards a few feet. I could see that it wouldn't take me long to hit the ground. I started to feel sick again, so I closed my eyes tightly and thought about anything other than the fact that I was falling through the air.

Before I knew it, my feet were brushing against the grass. I opened my eyes wide as I rolled onto the ground. I jumped to my feet and released the parachute. Guarnere was next to me in a second. He grabbed my arm and gave me a once-over.

"You look good, kid," he said, giving me his biggest grin. I clapped him on the shoulder and pointed toward the rest of our company, who was rushing forward.

"Let's go before we get left behind," I replied. He nodded and took off, his hand still wrapped tightly around my arm. I rolled my eyes at his protectiveness, but let him pull me along. We ran until our lungs were fit to burst. Bill pulled me down in the ditch that Easy had taken cover in. I sighed heavily and rubbed my arm.

"Good lord Bill, you nearly pulled my arm out of the socket," I muttered grumpily. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Sorry," he replied. I knew he didn't mean it and rolled my eyes at him. I looked around and saw Eugene a short distance away.

"Hey, Gene."

"You okay? The first time's always the hardest." I nodded quickly.

"Yeah, the training Buck's been giving me helped a lot with that," I told him with a smile. He nodded, watching as Hoobler and Cobb rushed by, their hands filled with bottles. I shook my head in exasperation.

"It wouldn't be the military if we didn't take every opportunity to loot whatever we come by," Hoobler said in response.

"I've seen worse," I said.

"Yeah I hear the SS near about kill babies to get whatever they want." I shuddered, thinking about all the women and children I'd seen murdered.

"You have no idea," I said. The men around me went silent, as though something had been dragged up from the past. I didn't often get questioned about my time with the Germans, and it wasn't something I really ever wanted to think about again. Lieutenant Peacock's voice broke through my thoughts.

"...going in through this field here," he said and pointed to our left. Bull nodded and turned back to all of us. He motioned for us to move out, which we all did without question. I fell into step beside Roe. I didn't try to talk and neither did he. We were listening intently to everything around us. Suddenly, we both heard it. It was a small noise, but everyone became tense. Two men ran forward, Bull close on their heels as the rest of us knelt close to the ground. In the distance, I could make out the form a woman as she opened a window. My pulse slowed when I saw her begin to tie an orange sheet around the window.

"Hold your fire," Bull ordered us. Roe and I glanced at each other, secretly glad that we wouldn't be fixing anyone's wounds in the near future.

As we walked into town, we were swarmed by thousands of people, each wanting to thank us personally for liberating them from the Nazis. I groaned as the third woman in a row mistook me for a man and kissed me on the cheek.

"I'm a woman!" I shouted at her. She simply stared at me and shrugged her shoulders, moving on to kiss Guarnere on the cheek with a laugh. I threw up my hands in frustration and rushed forward to where Dick and the other officers had congregated. I watched Dick look through his binoculars and blushed a little when he caught my eye. Just as he did, a woman slid up in front of him and kissed him. I stared at him, my jaw dropping open slightly. He stared at me for a moment before glancing at Nixon, who was staring at me.

Deciding to try and be the bigger person, I approached them.

"Nix, Dick, Harry," I said and nodded at all of them. Lew's famous smirk overcame his mouth.

"Hey, Adelina, glad you made it past your first jump!" he said as he threw his arm around my shoulder. I kissed him on the cheek.

"Good to see you too, Nix," I said.

"So,did you throw up?" Harry asked, wiggling his eyebrows. I shook my head and beamed at them.

"I didn't actually," I told them. Both Harry and Lew clapped me on the shoulder.

"That's great," they said in unison. We all looked inconspicuously at Dick, who was staring at me with a mixture of joy and disbelief.

"Right," Lew muttered then grabbed Harry by the arm, "Harry, I swore I saw them passing out food over there. Let's try and find some." Harry, catching on, nodded and let Nixon lead him into the crowd.

Dick and I stared awkwardly at one another for a few minutes.

"Dick, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. For before, I mean," I said quietly. I knew that even over the noise, he would hear me. He nodded and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. I could tell that he wanted to say something to me, but didn't quite know how to say it.

"Adelina, I think it would be better if we were just friends," he said in a rush, as if saying it faster would lessen the pain of the truth. I nodded, my head spinning slightly. I wanted to disagree with him. But, deep in my heart, I knew all along that it was all we could ever be.

"Thank you, Dick," I said and placed a hand on his arm.

"You're welcome." I glanced up at him and smiled. I considered telling him that I'd meant what I'd said that night. That I could fall in love with him if I let myself. But, I withheld, sensing that it would only make this harder on the both of us. Dick picked up his binoculars again and looked out on the crowd.

"Let's go and find Nix so we can't the hell out of this," he said. I grinned and took his hand.

"Lead the way, Captain."

**So kind of a stupid ending and I'm sorry all you Winters supporters. The love triangle is no more, or is it? Hehe, maybe Adelina and Dick will find letting go of each other more difficult than they thought? Idk because I haven't written the next chapter yet. I know there wasn't a lot of action or much of anything in this chapter, but trust me, the next one will be better. **

**Anyway, as always, please review if you have the time. I'm finding reviews a bit hard to come by these days. Just kidding, enough come in to let me feel loved. Huge thank you to wild-in-spirit, sezq, captain ty, and Kurai-Seirei-no-Hotaru for reviewing last chapter. Love all of you as usual!**


	17. Chapter 17

Adelina's POV

I was squished between Martin and Heffron as we rode into Neunen, a town Webster was quick to point out that Van Gogh was born in. We watched solemnly as we passed by one of the women who'd had her hair shaved off for sleeping with a German. Wrapped in her arms was a small baby. I felt a pang of my heart and thanked God that I hadn't gotten pregnant from all of the times that Fleischer had taken his fill of me. Sorrow and pity rocked me, but I tried to tell myself that she had chosen her fate by sleeping willingly with the enemy. And as soon as we passed her and I could no longer see her and her baby, it was wiped from my mind instantly. I turned my eyes back to the front. I saw a Lieutenant walking forward, completely exposed in the middle of the road.

"Get a load o' General Patton," Hoobler said. I craned my neck. Bull leaned forward, fear and concern filling his eyes. I knew he had the same sinking feeling in his stomach.

"Lieutenant!" he shouted, causing the man to turn before he was shot in the neck. I gasped and grabbed Martin and Heffron.

"Take cover, dammit!" I yelled when everyone around me froze for a split second. Martin and Heffron each grabbed one of my arms and dragged me off the tank into the ditch beside the road. I struggled in their grip.

"I've got to go and get him out of the road!" I said, my voice strained from the effort of trying to get away from them. They pulled me to the ground.

"Wait a minute, Adelina! We've got to make sure it'll be safe for you," Babe said as Guarnere joined them in holding me down. I struggled for a moment more before relaxing.

"This is so unfair. I don't try to stop any of you from doing your jobs," I muttered angrily. They winked at me.

"Well, we're not girls. And we haven't caught the eye of Lieutenant Badass either," Hoobler said next to us. I rolled my eyes.

"Who's taken a liking to me has nothing to do with it. I'm over Speirs and I don't care what he'd approve of me doing and neither should you." I knew I was lying, but the anger in my eyes seemed to prove my point.

"Martin let her go. We need a medic up here that knows what the hell they're doing!" Bull was shouting from the front of the queue as he tried desperately to get the men moving again. The three of them finally let me go.

"Thank you," I said before stomping away and up to the wounded man. Shots were flying everywhere and I could see that one medic had already failed. He was lying on the ground next to the Lieutenant, clutching his leg and cursing every time he spoke. I threw myself down beside them and looked the other medic in the eyes.

"Can you wait while I fix him up?" I asked him, having to shout over the tanks and the bullets flying around us. He nodded and watched me while I worked. I took no time in throwing the top of my medical bag open and grabbing a surret of morphine. Lieutenant Brewer's hands relaxed and fell to his sides. I bent over him and took a look at his neck. There was no exit wound, which meant that I would have to find it. Feeling only a small wave of queasiness, I stuck a finger in the hole and searched for the piece of metal still lodged underneath his skin. I pulled it out and smiled at it. I had to admit, it was sort of morbid to be smiling at a bloody bullet.

"Gotcha, you bugger," I said and then tossed it to the side of the road. I poured sulfa on his neck and then placed two bandages over it for his wound. It was still leaking a lot of blood. I looked over at the medic and sighed. I went over to him and knelt close to his ear.

"Alright, I'm going to move you so that you can place pressure on the Lieutenant's neck. I won't be able to use any morphine though. Otherwise, you'd be completely useless," I explained to my fellow medic. He nodded quickly and then helped me to move him so that he could do as I'd asked. A few minutes later, I wrapped the bandage around his leg and smiled at him.

"Want that morphine now?"

"Yes, ma'am. I'd appreciate that," he said, his voice reminding of Roe's. I remembered Eugene telling me once that he was from Louisiana.

"Where are you from, soldier?" I asked him.

"I was born in Louisiana, ma'am. But I've been living in New York for the last few years."

"I thought your accent seemed familiar. I've got a friend that's from Louisiana."

"And you've gotta be from England, am I right?" I nodded and grinned.

"That obvious?" He shrugged and looked at me with a crooked grin.

"Your voice gave it away a little bit. Plus, I don't know any woman back home who would call a bullet a bugger," he said. I giggled and then clapped my hand over my mouth when a few more men came over and took a look at the medic and the Lieutenant. They were helping them onto two stretchers.

"I'll take that as a compliment then." The medic smiled at me one last time.

"You should. What's a pretty girl like you doin' out here anyway?"

"I'm a field nurse. Colonel Sink seemed pleased that he'd gotten me instead of someone else."

"Well good luck."

"Good luck to you too..."

"Tommy. My name's Tommy Harrison. Maybe you could look me up sometime the next time you're in New Orleans. After this shit blows over," he shouted back to me as he motioned at the chaos ensuing all around us.

"I'll do that. Take care of yourself, Tommy."

"I didn't catch your name."

"Adelina Jones."

"I'll remember you. You're with Second Battalion?"

"Yes."

"I'll write to you." I shook my head. I felt like as nice as his words were to hear, they could very well be completely meaningless. I watched him disappear behind the tanks and then I turned around and searched for the guys. I took off running when I saw that there was already a man lying on the ground. Martin was standing next to him and shouting for a medic over and over again. When I got closer, I realized it was Joye Toye.

"You got this, kid?" Martin asked me. I nodded quickly and shooed him away. He spared me a quiet smile before running off. I turned my eyes again to Toye.

"Joe! Where are you hit?"

"My side." I nodded and lifted up his jacket to get a better look at it. The bullet hadn't made it very far in. Half of it was still sticking out.

"Alright, I see it, Joe. I'm gonna pull it out, alright?"

"Just do it," he said through gritted teeth. I grabbed the metal between my index finger and my thumb. I pulled it out as fast as I could and stuck my free hand over the hole it left.

"Morphine?" I asked, my mind so focused that I couldn't form a complete sentence.

"No, I'll be okay," he said. I could see that he was in a lot of pain, but I didn't try to argue with him. Joe Toye had always been a man who I knew didn't want to be seen as weak in any sense of the word. I bandaged him as well as I could. I shuddered slightly at the sight of the blood stains on my hands.

"Do you want me to walk you back?"

"I'll be okay, Adelina. Thanks," he said, his eyes glinting with genuine gratitude. I clapped him on the shoulder and handed him his helmet.

"Just don't get shot again."

"Can do." And with that, he was gone. I sighed in relief. I managed to save three people today. I allowed a small second of happiness before I glanced around, realizing now that a profound silence was surrounding me. I spotted Martin a short distance away. We met each other's eyes at the same time and he motioned me over quickly. I threw my medical bag over my shoulder and ran over to him, dodging bullets on my way. I slammed into the building he was leaning up against and sucked in a huge breath.

"You did good out there, kiddo," Martin said with an affectionate smile at me.

"Thanks, Johnny," I muttered before Bull told him to go around the building. I stayed with Bull, who gave me a smile.

"Alright stay close, Adelina. I don't wanna be Sparky's next shooting target." I rolled my eyes and smacked his arm playfully. He laughed and then got abruptly serious.

"Alright, let's go." I nodded and followed as close as I could behind him. We raced along the sides of buildings, Bull swinging his rifle around in case someone decided to shoot at us and me clutching my medical bag for dear life. Finally, we settled into a crater beside the road. Bull motioned for some of his squad to move up. Hashey, one of the newest replacements, led the group and stopped in the middle of the pebbled street.

"Kraut!" he shouted and pointed his weapon at the enemy. He tried to shoot, but found that his rifle was jammed. Beside me, Bull heaved an annoyed sigh as Hashey just stood in the street, a stationary target for the Germans to fire at.

"Move Goddamn it!" Bull shouted at the top of his lungs. Hashey looked up and then down at his rifle again, as if he'd just realized where he was and what he was doing.

"Hashey, move!" I yelled, hoping that it would break him from his trance. It did.

"Shit," I heard him mutter before running for cover. As soon as he did, Bull grabbed me by the hand and lifted me to my feet. He pointed to where Hashey was and pushed me toward it. I got the hint and ran as fast as I could to Hashey's side. My lungs were burning with their need for more and more oxygen, but I didn't care. I couldn't afford to not keep going. Especially not with men being shot at out here. They needed me and I wanted to help as much as I could.

"Okay, let's go," Bull said and led us away to where we could see the rest of first platoon moving forward. I was the last in the line and tried to keep my thoughts focused on nothing but the crunch of the stones beneath my feet and the pounding of my heart. But, in amongst the driving of my pulse, I could see all of the faces of the men. And somewhere deep inside, I was weeping. Devastated at the thought of losing any of them. I closed my eyes for a second and took a deep breath. I could do this. I had gone nearly five years without breaking. Without feeling as if my entire world was threatening to fall down around me. But then, I'd never felt this way about anyone during the war. I hadn't felt this sharp yearning pain at the thought of one of my patients dying or any of the SS soldiers not coming back to me. I hadn't allowed myself to care because I didn't want to care. They weren't important enough to me to waste the energy. But Easy Company was different. And Ron. He was different. I inhaled sharply as I leaned against a wall beside Bull. The rest of first platoon trailed along behind us. Bull paused a moment to catch his breath before he moved up a little from the rest of us while Martin led three other guys to a position on the opposite side of the road.

We could all see it. About a hundred yards away, a Tiger tank was lying in wait for the British tanks to come into their line of sight. A painful chill ran up my spine. I craned my neck to watch Martin and Heffron run back toward the British tanks. Martin jumped onto the first one and motioned toward the hidden tank. I saw the look of annoyance that passed over his features. He nodded once in acquiescence and then slid down to the ground beside Heffron again.

"He's gonna see you real soon," I heard him shout before they both came running back to us. The tanks started forward again and I held my breath. After two long minutes of anxious waiting, the second tank in the line was fired on. I jumped slightly and I felt a warm arm tighten around my shoulders. After the shock wore off somewhat, I looked up at who it was. Cobb. I couldn't believe my eyes as he tugged my hand.

"Adelina, we've got to fall back!" he said, his voice urgent. I nodded and then ran with him to a safer position. I looked over my shoulder as the sound of an explosion pounded through the air. I gasped when I saw Bull had fallen on the ground. I tried to run back to him, but Cobb kept a firm grip on my arm.

"You can't go back!" he shouted over the whine of bullets passing right next to our bodies. I stared at him with pain in my eyes.

"Damn it all!" I yelled and wrenched my arm from his grasp. He made no move toward me, just watched me struggle with my inner turmoil to go back or stay. I payed for my hesitance as a bullet, one out of hundreds, that managed to hit it's intended mark. I sunk to the ground as the small piece of metal tore through flesh and sinew. I cried out helplessly. My mind was a blank fog as I looked down at my thigh, where a fresh pool of blood was staining my uniform. I became aware of a pair of voices above me, calling my mind out of the dense fog.

"Adelina, are you alright?"

"God, she's in shock. Cobb, grab her left side. I've got her right." I felt myself being lifted off the ground and started to struggle. I could run by myself, what were they doing? They'd get themselves killed for trying to help me.

"Put me down!" I muttered and struggled out of their arms. They put me to the ground immediately, knowing it would do no good to argue. I clutched my medical bag safely to my chest and ran with them away from the shooting. Away from the fighting. I realized that it was Webster who was with us. I shot him a smile as we all sank to our knees next to a hedgerow. Hoobler and Van Klinken were there. Neither of them took note of my wound, for which I was more than glad.

"There's a ditch on the other side of this hedgerow," Hoobler told us and then crawled through the bushes. Van Klinken followed and I felt a deep twinge of horror as I heard the bullets hit the front of his uniform. Ignoring the men beside me, I threw myself after him and turned him over with Hoobler's assistance. I felt tears prick the corners of my eyes. Hoobler chose that moment to notice that I'd been hit.

"You're hurt, kid," he said and made to pull me away from Van Klinken.

"No, I'll be fine. Go get Roe. I can manage until he gets here," I told him, urging my voice to stay steady. His eyes bored into mine until he nodded at last.

"Come on guys," he motioned Webster and Cobb to follow him, which they did. I could see that all of them were more than upset about the fact that they had to leave me, a woman, behind. I gasped slightly when I felt Van Klinken's fingers entwine with mine.

"Don't leave me," he whispered. I shook my head as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"I won't, Robert, I promise," I told him and kissed his hand. He smiled sadly and then turned his head slightly when a noise met our ears. I saw Roe charging towards us, a blind determination in his eyes. I moved out of his way, taking care not to let go of Robert's hand. I watched Eugene work with a sense of silent awe overcoming every other emotion. He was calm and was able to bend every ounce of concentration to the task at hand. He turned to me suddenly and smiled.

"He's gonna be okay, Adelina," he told me in that quiet, reassuring voice of his. I nodded, relief flooding my every pore. Behind me, I became aware of the men screaming at everyone to fall back. I grabbed Roe's arm.

"Let's get the hell out of here, Gene," I said simply before grabbing one strap of Van Klinken's bag. Roe grabbed the other one and together we dragged him back amidst the rain of bullets now falling on us from the enemy. We ran until our lungs were fit to burst. We passed wave upon wave of men and I found myself staring resolutely to the front as I heard bodies fumble to the ground. As we were running, I saw something that made my skin crawl. A moment later, I heard Malarkey's voice calling for a medic. Roe glanced at me and then called over a passing soldier.

"Webster, help her," he said simply before running off to tend to Buck Compton. I closed my eyes for a second before continuing on with Webster at my side. Together, we made our way back to the trucks that were waiting for us behind the British tanks. I sighed happily when I began to see more familiar faces. Webster and I hoisted Van Klinken onto the back of a truck. Webster climbed on after him and held out his hand to help me up.

"Oh thanks, Web, but I have to talk to Lipton," I said and went to go find the First Sergeant. I found him talking to Guarnere and realized that Bill was already taking care of my mission.

"Lip, I don't think we know where the Bull is," he was telling Lipton in a low voice. I watched them leave and went to take a look at Buck. I saw where he'd been hit and couldn't help but grin.

"Don't you laugh, Adelina," he told me as he winced in pain. I covered my mouth and shook my head.

"I would never do that, Buck," I said playfully. I felt a jolt when a familiar set of fingers closed around those of my left hand. I twirled around and found myself face-to-face with Dick. Without a second of thought, I jumped on him and kissed both of his cheeks.

"Oh, thank God!" I whispered. Underneath my lips, his cheeks were burning and I could feel my own face turning red as I realized what I'd done. Awkwardly, I let my feet hit the ground and stepped away from him. He stared at me a moment before taking my hand and leading me away from the truck full of soldiers.

"Let's go! Keep moving, keep moving!" he called out to the straggling men running up to us. Nixon came up and shot me a quick smile.

"How bad?" he asked Dick, who spared him a quick glance.

"I don't know yet," he replied honestly. We both heard it at the same time. The sound of a bullet ricocheting off metal. We both lunged for him at the same time.

"Nix!" we cried as one into the thick afternoon air.

"I'm alright, I'm alright," he reassured us. Dick was gripping him tightly by the arm. Nix looked up into our eyes, and suddenly wasn't so sure.

"_Am _I alright?" Dick shook his head to clear it.

"Yeah, do you feel alright?" he said, the relief evident in his soft voice.

"Yeah, just quit looking at me like that," Nixon said and struggled out of Dick's vice-like hold. I grabbed his hand and pulled him behind one of the tanks while Dick grabbed his discarded helmet. Lipton came over and knelt down before us.

"Captain, we got four dead and 11 injured."

"Okay, let's move 'em out." Lipton suddenly grabbed the front of Dick's ODs before he forgot.

"And sir, Randleman's missing too."

"Randleman?" Dick repeated in disbelief. The worry was clear on Lipton's face.

"Yes sir." He glanced at me and then nodded.

"Okay let's go," he said and grabbed my arm. He pushed me forward and helped me up onto a truck with mostly First Platoon guys on it. I was seated between Guarnere and Martin. His hand stayed clamped around mine for a second too long, making my stomach clench anxiously. I smiled at him, assuring him that I would be okay.

"Where's the Bull?" Bill asked over my head. Martin spared us both a glance and shrugged. His shoulders were moving in a rapid rhythm as he tried to catch his breath.

"Don't know," he replied. I laid my head down on his shoulder and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

"We'll find him, Johnny," I told him quietly then turned to the rest of the truck's occupants, "We'll find him." The conviction in my voice was enough to brighten some of the pain and fear in their eyes and I smiled warmly at them, wishing that I could do as much for myself.

***

I was seated next to Cobb, talking easily with Hashey and Garcia to pass the time. I had finally gotten comfortable after Roe had wrapped my thigh in a thick white bandage. I was used to being the medic not the patient and I had to admit that I preferred wrapping bandages rather than having to be fixed.

"I never fired a shot," Hashey was saying, half in disbelief and half in disappointment. I clapped him lightly on the back, a grin on my face.

"If it makes you feel any better, neither have I," I said. Garcia turned to me with an uplifted eyebrow.

"Not in the whole war?"

"Nope. Not with Easy and definitely not with the SS." Garcia and Hashey exchanged a significant glance.

"Oh, have the rest of the guys not filled you in on that about me?"

"Sergeant Randleman's told us bits and pieces and the other guys tried to feed us a load of bull about how you were a German who decided to switch sides on D-Day and found Easy by accident." I snorted at the last bit.

"Yeah, that is a load of bull," I agreed. Hoobler walked up and handed Cobb and I each a snagged bakery bun.

"I thought it was a good story," he said with an evil glint in his eyes. I laughed and thanked him.

"I should give you a swift kick in the arse for spreading rumors about me, Hoobler." He laughed and sank to the ground.

"Nah, you wouldn't dare," he said. A comfortable silence swept over us all as we bit into our bread. It didn't last for long.

"So, you hear anything?" We all knew what, or who rather, he was asking about.

"No, but I did hear that Lieutenant Brewer's going to make it," he explained conversationally. I saw Cobb shake his head.

"No fuckin' way."

"How is that possible?" Webster asked aloud.

"Well," Garcia began shyly, "He did turn his head at the last minute when Sergeant Randleman called out to him."

"Yeah, his neck wasn't as bad as I'd thought it would be when I got to him," I concurred softly. Bill Guarnere chose that moment to appear.

"Any sign of the Bull yet?" he asked, looking at me and Hoobler. We both shook our heads silently. Bill's head fell a little. When he lifted it again, I could a wild light in them that made me thankful I hadn't been awake the night he'd been christened "Wild Bill" Guarnere.

"If there ain't no body, then there ain't nobody fuckin' dead! Understand me?" he snapped. None of us took his outburst personally. We all knew that he was just as worried as any of us to what had happened to one of the most loved Sergeants in Easy. We all stared at him awkwardly and I shifted to place a hand over his. I noticed that it was shaking slightly. Hoobler stood up, muttering that he was gonna go look for him. Guarnere mimicked his action.

"Not by yourself you're not. I'll go with ya," he replied, "Let me go get some ammo." He started to walk away until Hashey and Garcia stood up.

"That's okay, I'll go," Hashey said.

"Me too." I grinned at them and then at Bill, who nodded.

"Alright," he said, then jerked his head toward Neunen, "Go get 'im." He continued his march off to wherever he was going and I turned towards the guys. They were all staring at me adamantly, a warning in their eyes that made me sigh.

"You Yanks and you're need to be noble all the time. Can't even let me tag along for the fun," I grumbled as I struggled to stand up on my own. Webster helped me up and I gave him a small smile. They all let out a breath as one. I turned back to Bill and yelled for him to wait for me. I gave Garcia, Hashey, Hoobler, Cobb, and Webster each a hug and a peck on the cheek.

"Be careful, alright? Don't go doing anything stupid," I cautioned them. They all nodded and got ready to leave. My chest was tightening painfully until I realized that there was nothing I could do to stop them from leaving. Knowing that I was about to break at any moment, I trailed after Bill and latched onto his arm. I leaned against him, my breath coming in short bursts.

"Bill, tell me they'll be alright." Guarnere, whom I'd never know to be so sensitive, wrapped his arms around me. We stood there like that, cloaked in darkness, for God knew how long.

"They're gonna be okay, Adelina. Don't ya worry about them," he said and kissed me on the temple affectionately. I nodded, knowing that if I had faith in those words then they would be alright. So, I convinced myself slowly that they would come back. All of them and then pulled back from Bill to give him a kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks, Bill, you always know how to cheer a girl up," I said, wriggling my eyebrows. I was thinking of the numerous women I'd seen him with in both England and Eindhoven. He rolled his eyes and ruffled my hair.

"Shaddup!" he muttered before throwing his arm around my shoulder, "Come on, let's go tell the other fellas about Hoobler's suicide mission."

**So kind of a cute ending. Or at least I think so. A lot of cute moments in here with numerous men. Is Adelina a player or what? Send in your thoughts about that particular front whether it be Cobb's care for her or Dick's need to touch her hand for too long, or whatever you want. As long as it's in a review or PM, I'll know you're still interested. I know it's been a while since I last updated. And I apologize for that. In between writing this chapter and co-writing A Drink Will Do That with my fellow conspirators captain ty and Iloveboyswhosparkle, I've been pretty busy. Which by the way, if you want to check out our story, it's under the lovely captain ty's name, so go check it out. Pretty pretty please? Okay please review if you have the time and tell me how this chapter was. I promised you action so you got it even though it wasn't all that spectacular so I want, no need, reviews for feedback on how I'm doing. And you should know that this is the longest chapter ever. I think it was almost 4600 words without the Author's Note, so there you go. Okay love you all once again, I only own Adelina, the evil Fleischer, Tommy Harrison, and any original plot details that you don't already recognize. Alright, enough of my rambling! Adieu. :D**


	18. Chapter 18

Adelina's POV

"Hey Adelina! Wild Bill!" Muck called out as we came up to him, Penkala, Malarkey, Lipton, and Heffron.

"Hey fellas," we both said in unison. I took a seat between Malarkey and Muck, who slung his arm over my shoulder. He motioned toward my bandaged leg.

"You gonna live?" he asked me with a small smirk. I shrugged.

"I guess we'll see. Roe said something about the bullet hitting a main artery but I think I'll be okay," I said playfully. The guys all laughed and then got serious. I looked at them all, rolling my eyes.

"Which of you Yanks is going to play the hero and tell me to take it easy and stay out of the action from now on? I already got it earlier from Winters and Welsh," I said, slightly aggravated. I had hoped that the subject wouldn't be broached tonight, but it seemed as if I'd been living on a ticking time bomb.

"We just worry about you, Adelina. If it'd been just a few inches in any direction, you would have been killed for sure," Malarkey said as he nudged me slightly with his shoulder. I sighed heavily, something in me giving way to their sincere concern.

"I know. But I get worried about all of you too. I mean, one more medic out there is a few more men saved. And I think you all tend to forget that I've been out here for bloody near five years," I finished with an airy laugh. They all shifted as one to look at me inquisitively.

"Five years?" Malarkey repeated in wonder. I shrugged.

"Okay I take that back. Two years. For the first half of the war, I was a nurse working at a base hospital in London. That's where Captain Fields found me. Exhausted of playing doctor. The last day that he was there before being discharged, he approached me about the possibility of taking a bigger part in the war effort. He preached about God and duty to your country and all that. But it really didn't take much to have me convinced. It was probably both the best and worst decision of my life. The worst because I realized quickly that it wasn't filled with all the glory that I imagined and the best because if I hadn't, I never would have met any of you," I said, not once moving my eyes from any of theirs. Each of them smiled, genuinely affected by my words.

"Ah, hell, kid!" Guarnere said as he shook his head and clapped me on the shoulder.

"You're so damn sentimental, Adelina. What do you see in Sparky anyway? You'd probably be better off with Winters. Hell even Nixon would be a better match for you." I giggled a little behind my hand before standing up.

"Maybe it's the fact that he isn't any good for me that draws me to him," I said with a Nixon-like smirk that surprised even me. With that, I turned around and started walking off with no clear destination. It didn't take long for my words to sink in and for the boys to start laughing. A smile crept onto my lips. But it wasn't long-lived. I hadn't taken ten steps away from them before I knocked into something very solid. The way my legs twisted beneath me guaranteed that I would fall to the ground. I closed my eyes, anticipating the impact that never came. Two strong arms closed around my waist and I knew who they belonged to. Even through my uniform, my skin had suddenly caught fire. I smiled as my eyes opened lazily. I took in the sight of his glassy eyes and knew that he was having as hard a time as I was. Not being able to contain the itch to add to the depth of our contact, my fingers flitted across the stubble on his cheek. His eyelids closed over his mesmerizing orbs and I found myself inhaling sharply as my name tumbled from his lips. My heart jumped into my throat and I found myself leaning forward, closing the distance between us fast. And I realized that he was leaning in too. The breaking of a twig nearby caused both of us to pull back. I bit my lip, my cheeks filling with heat when I realized that he was still holding onto me. He cleared his throat.

"I hope I didn't scare you too much," he said, his voice silky and flowing through my senses like electricity. Dazed, I shook my head slowly.

"No, you didn't, Lieutenant Speirs," I said, not thinking that it would be appropriate to address him so informally. His eyes flashed as he caught notice. Unable to contain himself, he let out a primal growl.

"So we're back to that then?" he asked angrily. I trembled in his arms.

"I just thought...With all that's happened..." I said and then my voice trailed off as he stood up straight and abruptly let go of me. I gasped as I staggered backwards and a sharp pain shot up through my leg. I sank to the ground, my eyes filling with uncontrollable tears. Ron was next to me in a moment. For the first time, his eyes roved over the bandage on my leg.

"What happened?" he asked, his hand gently touching my hand. Anger flared within me at the velocity of his mood shift.

"Oh sod off!" I hissed. He stared at me for a moment before bending his head and kissing my forehead. As mad as I was at him, I couldn't help but smile at his tenderness. But I made sure that he didn't see my response. Before he stood up, he swept a gentle hand across the bandage covering most of my thigh. Though his expression gave nothing away except perhaps a distant curiosity, I knew that in his touch there was something much more than that. That simple gesture had translated simply into a plea for me to take better care of myself. And with that, he was gone. I couldn't bring myself to be mad any more. This had shown me that Ronald Speirs, a man I'd believed would remain impenetrable forever, really did have feelings for me. It wasn't just an insatiable desire for the other's body that made it impossible for us to stay away from each other. His subtle concern over my well-being was a testament to that. And I knew that even more than my need for those rapturous lips, I wanted to know every thought and every dream that had ever passed through his mind.

***

I heard shouts and whistles resound through the air and knew instinctively that Bull was back along with the guys that had gone out to look for him. I jumped to my feet as quickly as I could and ran towards the large queue that had formed. I pushed past a few replacements, feeling more than irritated.

"Let me see him, you buggers!" I yelled, efficiently creating a gap just from the anger in my voice. Bull turned towards me as I ran into his arms.

"I should go missin' more often!" Bull laughed as I kissed him on both cheeks.

"No, the next time you do it, I'll shoot you in your damn arse!" I exclaimed and clapped him on the arm. I saw him wince and looked up at him with concern.

"Did you get hit?" I asked him, my voice urgent. He squeezed my hand reassuringly.

"Adelina, I just got a piece of explodin' tank stuck in my shoulder is all. I think I'll be alright. Just bandage me up, and it'll be fine," he replied, soothing my fears slightly.

"Alright, come over here," I said and pulled him off to the side to clean his shoulder and then wrap it in a bandage, which I do in less than five minutes. Just in time for Lipton to shout to us that we were moving out.

"Never did like this company none," Bull muttered, earning a playful nudge from me.

"Be grateful, Bull. At least we got you back _before _we had to move out." He chuckled and then switched gears. He called out to second squad to get on their feet and get in the trucks. I fell into step beside Guarnere, who was the second platoon sergeant.

"Mind if I ride with you guys? Between you and me I was kinda tired of those First Platoon fellas." Guarnere snorted and then threw an arm over my shoulders.

You're welcome to ride with us whenever you please, kiddo," he said as he helped me into the back of Second Platoon's truck. I giggled and took a seat beside Malarkey. I couldn't deny that I was in a good mood. And I didn't know if it was because Speirs had finally kissed me or if it was because Bull and the others were all back with us safe and sounds. As I settled against Malarkey's shoulder to take a nap, I thought it was probably a little bit of both.

***

_October 5, 1944_

I was sitting next to Dick, watching him polish his rifle. I occasionally let my head drop to his shoulder. I was exhausted. I hadn't slept in two days.

"Adelina, this is the fifth time you've done that," Dick said as my head bumped against his arm once again.

"Everything's quiet, Adelina. Why don't you go to sleep?" Luz said as he motioned towards his radio. At that moment, Joe Liebgott and Joe Lesniewski came in, carrying Alley between them.

"Alley's hurt! I was the first on my feet and ran over to them. I took one look at Alley and gasped. I knew just from looking at him that he'd been hit by a potato masher.

"What was it?"

"Potato masher, Adelina," Lesniewski said quietly. I nodded and then turned to the man closest to me.

"Boyle, go get Doc Roe! Tell him to bring my medical bag," I yelled at him. My hand darted towards his wrist where I checked his pulse. It was higher than normal, but it wasn't alarming. Breathing a sigh of relief, I gripped his left hand with both of my own. Dick moved to his other side and looked at Liebgott.

"Where was it?"

"Where the road crosses the dike, sir," he replied. I saw that he was holding a bandage to his neck. I made a note to fix him up when we were done with Alley.

"What happened? What happened?" Alley asked as he turned his head toward me.

"You got hit, Moe, but you're gonna be fine. Doc's on his way now," I said gently. I heard Liebgott telling Lesniewski to back off, but I didn't look up. Alley's eyes were boring into my own.

"It hurts, kiddo," he whimpered. I smiled through my tears.

"I know. As soon as Doc gets here, we'll give you some morphine, okay?" He nodded weakly and then squeezed my hand lightly. I focused on what was happening around us and realized that the men were moving around the room. I glanced around and realized that they were going out there. Dick met my eyes and smiled reassuringly. As everyone filed out of the room, I wanted to tell them to be careful. I wanted to make sure that all of them made it back safely, but I knew it wasn't possible. Roe was here and I had a duty to take care of Alley first before I did anything else.

"Here's your bag, Adelina," Roe said as he threw the bag to me from several feet away. I smiled gratefully and rifled through it to find an used surret. I found one and plunged it into Alley's shoulder. He relaxed at once and smiled lazily up at me. Roe chuckled.

"Looks like you've got a fan," he said before switching again into doctor mode. He turned to Liebgott, the only man who'd stayed behind.

"Take off his boots and elevate his legs." Liebgott nodded and then did as he was told.

An hour later and we were loading Alley onto the back of a truck that would take him to an aid station farther back from the line. I smiled at him and kissed his hand.

"You'll be back with us in no time, Moe," I said as I winked at him. He nodded and relaxed into the stretcher he was laid out on. The truck started up and I waved until I couldn't see him anymore. I walked back inside and found Roe washing his hands with the water in his canteen. I followed his example and wiped my dripping hands on my pants.

"I don't even know why we bothered. We're going out there anyway," I said as I jerked my head toward the doors. Roe laughed and then grabbed his medical bag.

"Let's get out there," he said and led the way towards where we knew Easy would be. The sun was riding the sky and I guessed that it was probably six in the morning. We ran as fast as we could through the rolling hills and finally got to Easy ten minutes later. They were all spread out in a ditch and we hunkered down in there with him, anticipating the inevitable call to move forward. We watched Talbert get up from his place beside Winters and rush backwards towards us. He looked pointedly at me.

"Winters saw you guys come out here. He wants you with him," he said. I nodded and then made my way along the line to Dick's side. He was talking to the men.

"We're going straight up the middle. So follow me," he said to them and then smiled at me, "And you, stay in the back, alright?" I nodded and settled next to Bull.

"How's the shoulder, Bull?" I asked him as he followed Dick's order to fix bayonets. He shrugged, sending me one of his crooked smiles.

"Good, so far as I know," he replied. I heard Dick tell everyone to go on the red smoke. A few moments passed by where no one said anything. We all waited with baited breath as Dick shifted slightly, setting his finger on the pin. In the next blink of my eye, he'd pulled it and had taken off across the field alone. I bit my lip, willing myself not to move. Not to run after him. Perconte and few other men jumped forward, but Lieutenant Peacock stopped them.

"Wait for the signal!" he shouted.

"Jesus Christ," I muttered against my hand. Then, at last, red smoke filled the air before us. I rose up with the rest of the men but waited until most of them had gotten out of the ditch. I would have to stay back anyway unless someone got hit. Dick fired on the Germans and the rest of the platoon joined him quickly. Roe and I stayed back so that we wouldn't be hit. We stood together, our stomachs sinking when we heard Peacock yelling something about another company. I gulped and clutched my bag as if it was my only tie to the world. When the Germans started with their artillery, I tensed. I sensed that someone was going to get hit very soon. To my left, I saw Boyle drop and I patted Roe's hand, telling him that I would get him. I ran over along with Dick and Lipton. I grabbed Boyle's fallen helmet while they dragged him to cover. I rushed down there and told them both that I could handle it on my own.

"You sure?" Lipton asked me. He could see the fear in my eyes. I nodded and pushed them towards where they were needed most.

"Yes, I've got this!" I shouted, my hands already at work retrieving a bandage and a tourniquet from my bag. They nodded and then ran across the road again. I worked quick and fast to fix him and I smiled triumphantly. He wasn't going to die. Not today. In the back of my mind, I could hear Dick yelling for me and I hurried to the edge of the road and looked over. The fighting was over, so I slipped back to Boyle's side and helped him to his feet.

"It's over, Boyle. Let's you get out of this ditch." He laughed as he threw an arm around my neck. Together, we scrambled up onto the road and walked over to where the wounded were already seated. They were passing cigarettes and canteens around. Boyle took a seat and I smiled at him.

"Go ahead. I know you wanna go see how the Captain's doing," he said with a wave of his hand. I giggled and clapped him on the back before moving away from them. My eyes searched the faces of those around me. I didn't see Dick anywhere. That's when I saw him standing reflectively beside Nixon for a moment. They both walked off and I made my way over to them. A jeep drove by me and I gasped as I looked at Colonel Sink for the first time in almost two months. It stopped right beside Dick and Nixon and I rushed forward.

"363rd Volksgrenadier hit Opheusden earlier this morning about the same time your SS made a run at my CP down the road. 3rd Battalion got the hell beat of 'em. Horton was killed."

"Major Horton's dead?" Nixon and I both asked him in shock. Sink nodded, his eyes showing his age. He looked more worn than I'd ever seen him.

"Yeah they hit 2nd Battalion's CP in force and he was organizing a defense." He looked at Nixon and me.

"Would you excuse us a minute," he said and then motioned for Dick to follow him. I glanced at Nixon and moved over to him.

"What do you suppose that's about?" I asked him. He shook his head, obviously not knowing either.

"No idea, kiddo," he replied. I rolled my eyes and stuck a hand on my hip.

"Why does everyone always call me that now?" I asked him. He shrugged and then ruffled my hair.

"Because you are a kid?"

"I'll be 23 soon, thank you very much," I said in my defense.

"Really?" Nixon said with a thoughtful look on his face and a twinkle in his eye. I waggled my finger at him, knowing where his thoughts were taking him.

"Don't you go planning anything, Lew. I mean it."

"Can I just ask when the special day is?" he asked mischievously. I groaned inwardly.

"October 12." He smirked and then clapped me on the shoulder.

"You just signed yourself up for the crappiest birthday party ever in the history of the world." I couldn't help but giggle. I was already resigned to the reality that Nixon would throw me a party whether I wanted or not.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

**Kind of a cute ending. I thought anyway. Not sure what you guys will say. Hopefully the almost kiss between Adelina and Speirs will have some more people reviewing. Even if it's like, "Wow that was the crappiest chapter ever." I really don't care. I am in desperate need of feedback. Thank you to sezq, captain ty, and Kurei-Seirei-no-Hotaru! You guys are the best because you sent me reviews this chapter. And a HUGE thank you to captain ty who gave me inspiration for this chapter for first off giving me the idea of the almost kiss and for writing such great chapters for A Drink Will Do That. Yeah I just went there with the self-publicity. In case you haven't read it, which you really should, its a story that captain ty, Iloveboyswhosparkle, and I are cooking up together. It's under captain tys name and is mostly her genius creation. So yes go read it and show your love by sending in a review. We love them! Okay thanks for reading my randomness. Hopefully, the next chapter will be out by the weekend. I know this one took a while. Lastly, I own nothing in this story that you recognize. Not the people, places, not even the canteens unless it's Adelina's. Okay now review! :D And sorry for any mistakes. My computer was being a moron and wouldn't let me edit properly. **


	19. Chapter 19

I sunk, exhausted, onto Dick's bed and knew that in a few minutes I would be asleep. It had been a trying week that I wanted nothing more than to forget. Roe, the other medics of 2nd Battalion, and I had all been busy doctoring the casualties from the fight at the crossroads. And to top it all off, two days ago, Dick had been promoted to 2nd Battalion's XO. We all knew that he had wanted to refuse the opportunity. We all knew that Dick was more than capable of handling us in the field. But Sink had told him not to worry about administration, so he'd had no choice but to accept it. I knew that he was having a hard time. I could tell every day that he was struggling with the new responsibilities of taking over the Battalion. Nixon and I helped him where we could typing up reports and keeping him informed of Easy's activities.

Thankfully, we'd gotten a good replacement for Dick. Moose Heyliger was a good man. He was intelligent, had a good sense of humor, and most importantly he took the time to make sure that each and every man and myself was okay in whatever they were doing. He would walk the lines at night to check on the guys. And occasionally, he'd stop by the aid station to check on me. I found that he was a really easy-going guy and we got along really well.

But even with the distraction of Moose's visits, my mind wandered constantly back to Speirs. I ached to see him again and couldn't ever remember ever wanting a man so badly in my life. And as my eyes closed, I knew that I would be dreaming of him tonight. Until I heard someone knocking at the door.

"Oh for Pete's sake!" I mumbled before rolling off the mattress. I stumbled awkwardly toward the door and wrenched it open. Standing there, in all his glory, was Moose. I glared at him and wiped my eyes.

"What is it Moose? If you're looking for Dick-," I started, but he interrupted me almost at once. He grabbed my hand without saying a word and began to drag me down the stairs. I stared at him breathlessly.

"Moose, what the hell is going on?" I demanded of him. I stopped walking and folded my arms across my chest.

"Just come on, something's happened!" Fear rose within me and I found my fingers were twisting themselves in the folds of my uniform.

"What do you mean?" he looked for a moment as though he didn't want to say, but finally his eyes softened. He grabbed my hand again, this time simply holding it.

"Adelina, I was just talking to Dick and he wanted me to come get you. He said it was really important." I nodded thoughtfully, my brain doing flips as I wondered what could be wrong. I considered the possibility that I was finally being sent back to England. Fear constricted my throat and as we walked quickly along the cobbled street, I could find nothing to say. I could find nothing to distract myself. At last, we arrived at the company CP and I found Nixon and Dick sitting inside looking anxious. When I walked in with Moose, Dick grabbed me immediately and led me over to an empty chair. The distress on their faces was clear and I only looked at them with tears pricking the corners of my eyes.

"Dick, what's wrong?" I asked, my voice sounding quiet and strained. His only reply was to turn away from me and ask Nix and Moose to give us a moment. I heard the door shut softly behind them and gulped. Dick sunk to one knee before me.

"Adelina, Ron's been hurt," he told me gently. It felt as though my heart had stopped. And the world tilted, leaving me helpless to stop it.

"W-where is he?" I asked him, my worst fears curdling within my breast to be replaced with someone infinitely more terrifying. If he died, I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

"They're bringing him back up now. I just got off the phone with Dog's radio man."

"What happened?"

"I'm not sure I should tell you, Adelina. You look scared enough as it is."

"Dick...I have to know," I pleaded. It felt as if my heart was being ripped to shreds as I desperately coveted the maze of my mind for some sliver of hope.

He gave a sigh and then sat down beside me. I turned towards him, our knees touching. I braved a glance at his face and wished that I hadn't. His eyes were filled with so many emotions. I could tell that above all he was concerned about me and how this was going to affect me. But I could also tell, with a twinge of guilt and regret, that he was looking at me with so much want and need. He wanted him to be the one I'd chosen. He wanted to be the one that I felt enough for that I would be reduced to tears just at the thought of him ceasing to exist. But the reality was that I had no more control over it than Dick had. I wondered briefly if under different circumstances I would have chosen him over Ron. But I realized that it wasn't even possible to consider. What I felt for Dick was a deep affection, but it wasn't passion. And as long as Ron was in my life, it never would be. Ron had quickly stolen a piece of my heart that I would never get back. And the realization sent the tears rolling down my cheeks. I loved him so much it hurt and now I was on the verge of losing him, I couldn't stand it.

"Dick, I have to know. Please."

"Alright. It seems that he was in charge of a patrol to determine enemy activity across the Neder Rijn River. He'd been watching the line the entire day and decided to swim across the river during the night. When he was coming back, he was wounded by a machine gun. Whoever was manning that gun was an excellent shot and hit him twice in the leg and once in the chest." I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand. My breath came in sharp rasps and I found myself hugging my sides, as if holding them would keep me together. Alarmed, Dick wrapped his arms around me and I let my head fall onto his chest. I gripped him as though he was my last lifeline. He smoothed my hair and rubbed my back soothingly. After a while, his quiet voice broke through our silence.

"He should be here any second. Do you want me to walk you down to the aid station? He's being placed there. He's refusing to be sent away from the line." I giggled suddenly through my sorrow.

"So he's coherent enough to still be giving orders?" Dick brushed away my tears and nodded. He stood up and held out his hand for me, which I accepted gratefully. I felt relief flood through every pore of my being. If he was well enough to still be barking orders at every man he saw, then he would make it for sure. I had to believe that, otherwise I would drive myself mad with worry.

Before we could go any further, physically or otherwise, I knew that I had to apologize to Dick. For leading him on, even if only for a few minutes, before ultimately being consumed by my feelings for Ron again.

"Dick," I said as I cleared my throat. He turned around expectantly and saw something in my eyes that made him shake his head understandingly.

"I know what you're going to say. And I don't need you to. I knew what I was getting into when I fell for you, Adelina. And while I'll admit that getting over you will be difficult, I think I was a bit hasty in telling Lew about my feelings for you," he told me, with a slightly guilty look on his face.

"You're saying that you're not in love with me, Dick?" He nodded, the guilt still the raging emotion within his eyes.

"Dick, are you actually feeling guilty for not falling in love with me?" I asked him incredulously as I wiped the corners of my eyes where small droplets of moisture were still forming. His laugh was shaky, signaling that I'd been right. I rolled my eyes and tugged his arm.

"As harsh as it may seem, I'm glad that you didn't. I've been feeling awful for the past two months trying to figure out how I was going to let you down easily when all this," I made a sweeping motion that was meant to encompass the tangled love triangle, "came to a head." Dick cracked a smile.

"A head? As in Ron pointing a gun at me and telling me to stay away from you?" I tried to picture it in my head. The images came quite easily and I knew they were exactly along the lines of my thinking. I told Dick as much and he laughed. After a few moments, he became serious again.

"You'll be careful around him, won't you?" he asked me.

"Why is everyone always asking me that? Ron Speirs, as intimidating as he is, has a softer side. And I intend to find it if I bloody well can." Dick chuckled softly.

"I didn't mean it like that. Adelina, the man is married. Are you sure you want to be investing so much time and energy in a relationship that might not last? I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but he might go back to his wife after the war, you know." I had considered that. But I found now that while I'd been adamant two months ago that I would stay away from him, I longed to be at his side again. I knew that until he rejected me outright, I would continue to drink up as much of him as I could.

"I think I've realized that I don't care, Dick. I want to care. I want to feel guilty, but I can't find it in me." Dick nodded, understandingly

"Just take care of yourself alright?" I nodded and kissed Dick on the cheek for caring so much.

"Of course I will."

***

We had just arrived at the aid station when we saw the truck parked out front. My heart was thudding hard and fast in my chest as I rushed forward. I ran through the doors and found Roe waiting for me by the door. He grabbed my arm and led me through the hallways of the building to a room at the back, just like the last time he'd been hurt. He was secluded from all of the other men, a blessing in itself. Roe's hand was on the door when we heard him scream at whoever was inside to get out.

"Don't fucking touch me! How many god damned times do I have to say that? Just get out before I blow your damn foot off!" A second later, the door was wrenched from Roe's hand and a terrified medic ran from the room. Roe looked at me and patted my arm.

"Take care o' yourself. I'm right down the hall if you need me," he said quietly before leaving as well. I took a deep breath in an effort to steady my nerves, but found the action fruitless. Tentatively, I reached out and pushed the door open further. He was laying there, with his uniform and the bandages that covered his wounds saturated with his blood with a smirk on his face. It was all I could do not to rush forward and wrap my arms around him in relief. He cocked his head slightly to see me and he smiled, his eyes softening slightly. I could see right away that he was high as a kite on morphine, so I just sidled forward and fingered his wounds tenderly to see his reaction. He didn't flinch at all. Not even his eyes betrayed his discomfort. I was startled when his voice filled the voids of silence in the room.

"You came," he muttered. His tone revealed no hidden emotions, but his eyes proved to me that those were the most tender words he'd ever spoken to me before. Unencumbered by hesitation because I knew that he wouldn't remember any of this in a few hours, I reached up and swept the hair from his eyes. My hand lingered on his cheek and remained there even as he laid his hand on mine.

"Of course I came," I replied. I became aware of the way his dark eyes glinted with lust and need at my words. With a slight sense of unease in his eyes, his rough fingers caressed the pulse in my neck. The moments ticked on and I realized that we were steadily leaning towards each other. That magnetic pull I felt for him seemed to be mutual. He had no idea the comfort that his fingers were bringing me.

"You're nervous," he stated. Seeing no way around the truth, I nodded. He glanced at me before taking the hand from his cheek and sliding it towards his neck. His fingers guided mine towards his pulse and I gasped slightly, feeling the thundering rhythm of his heart. I knew it matched mine and in that moment, I wanted to know everything about him. I wanted him body, mind, and soul. I wanted him for all of eternity and nothing would ever change my mind.

"Ron, I love you," I whispered, not minding for now if he didn't reciprocate my feelings. He'd never said the words aloud and I would never force him to. For now, his fingers and his soft lips were enough. He pulled my body flush against his, bending his face towards my exposed neck. A soft whisper filled the void between our heated flesh and then his lips were on me. He was shaking slightly, my only indication that he was anxious too. He hit a sensitive patch of skin, sending my head reeling backwards to grant him more access. I arched into his touch, wanting more. _Needing _more. A soft moan escaped my lips, spurring him onward. Up to the place I wanted him most. He paused for a heartbeat. I was quivering with anticipation. And I was nearly compelled to lean forward and close the gap, but I waited. As I always knew I would, I waited for him to come to me.

His lips were on mine, igniting a fire in my very soul. The electricity between us was hard to deny. I could hear it crackling in the air and permeating our bodies, pulling us ever closer together. My heart drummed, seemingly as quick as a hummingbird's wings. My stomach clenched with desire. My fingers knotted in his hair, holding him to me. While he kissed me, all I could hear was our frantic breathing and the sound of our lips as they parted. I leaned away from him just long enough to gage his reaction to me. His eyes were still closed, his lips still puckered in anticipation of my return.

"It doesn't matter if you don't feel the same way, Ron. It doesn't matter to me," I said and then was tugged toward him again by the sleeves of my uniform. This time, he was more passionate and I was more than willing to let him lead me. He quickly gained access to the inner folds of my mouth, which he set about exploring slowly and thoroughly. Feeling a bursting desire rising inside me as he moaned against me, I pulled away breathlessly. My own chest was heaving in it's need to fill my lungs with precious oxygen. He looked at me with wonder and awe in his eyes. Not used to seeing him so human, I reached out and touched his cheek.

"What is it?" I asked cautiously. A smile graced his handsome features, making my heart bleed a little bit more for want of him. With a small sigh, he leaned his forehead against my shoulder. Still slightly unsure as to how far I could push him with my sensitivity, I gingerly brushed my fingers through his hair.

"That was by far the best kiss I've ever experienced," he said, still breathless. I smiled.

"That was the best kiss I've ever experienced with any woman," he said, his eyes shining in sincere awe. I giggled and smoothed his ruffled collar.

"Thank you, but I think you were bloody brilliant yourself," I replied, caressing the hair at the back of his head. Beneath my fingers, I felt him shudder. He seemed happy and content for the first time.

"You're the first woman that I've ever wanted so much." His lips were lavishing kisses up and down my neck as he spoke. Even with his distraction, I felt my eyes brimming with tears. I sobbed quietly against him, holding him tighter. He pulled away and gazed at me in wonder. Slowly, his eyes softened and he reached forward to dry my cheeks. He smiled at me with nothing but love and understanding in his expression. My heart clenched painfully. I wanted him too and it was killing me on the inside. Reality was crashing in, reminding me of the one reason we couldn't be together. I choked on my sobs, moving away from his caressing fingers as I did.

"Ron, why did you lie to me? All those times we talked and you never once mentioned that you had a wife. I'm so ashamed of myself," I whispered solemnly. I was not quite out of his reach yet and his hand closed around my forearm, pulling me back towards him. His fingers forced my chin upwards so that I would look at him. Sincerity glowed in every corner of his eyes.

"Adelina, there's something I've been wanting to tell you something for a long time," he began, all teasing gone from his features, "The day we met, you changed something in me. You made me want and need and love again. I've never felt this happy in my entire life.

"I'm stuck in a marriage that I never ever wanted. I made a promise to a friend that if anything ever happened to him, I would take care of her. He never had to say it, but I knew he meant for me to marry her in the end if he should die. And when she got the telegram, it just seemed like the right thing to do. I convinced myself at first that I could love her. That I could treat her the way a man in love treats his wife. But I was young and as I matured, I realized that there was nothing to our relationship except the sex.

"We never talked, not about anything important. We were two strangers living together. And with you, it's so much different. So much better. I don't know much about you, Adelina, but I do know that I love you. And I know that you're an honest, caring person that loves me too." Struck by his honest confession, I leaned forward and kissed him, lingering there for a moment before laying down next to him and pressing my nose to his bare neck.

"I've never felt this way before, Ron. Sometimes I don't know how to make sense of it. But I do know that as long as you're here with me, I can overcome it. This isn't always going to be easy. I know it will be difficult for me to push the fact that you have a wife from my mind forever," I said. He nodded, his chin bumping gently against the top of my head.

"I know, but I'm willing to work at this. As long as you'll have me," he said, his voice profoundly tender. I cracked a smile suddenly.

"So, I'm guessing you aren't angry with me anymore?" He laughed against me, his breath coming in steady puffs of air against my face. He kissed me once more.

"No I'm not angry anymore." I smiled and nestled into his embrace.

"Good, because I was getting really tired of playing cat and mouse with you."

"And you think I wasn't? God that day in Holland, all I wanted to do was pull you into the woods so that I could ravish you until we were both too tired to move," he confessed. I blushed a deep crimson and hoped that he couldn't see it.

"Well, goodness, I suppose I should be glad that you've at least entertained the idea," I gasped. He chuckled, entwining our hands. I heard my own sharp intake of breath. I had a feeling that with every new show of sensitivity on his part, I would fall even more in love with him. Ron cleared his throat, sounding nervous as he said, "And have you...entertained the idea?" I leaned backwards and stared at him. He looked so impatient as he awaited my response. I only raised an eyebrow.

"I might have," I said, giving him no further explanation before laying back down again.

**Okay, not what you were expecting? Even better than you thought it would be? I know Speirs may be a little OOC in this chapter. He's extremely touchy feely in this one and way more talkative than I ever imagine he would be under different circumstances. But, as captain ty was only too kind to point out, he is doped up on morphine. So, it's making him a little bit more loose than usual. Which is great for Adelina and us because look what we got out of him? Juicy confessions, a little bit of insight into why he married his wife, and best of all, he finally kissed her. So, yeah I'm pretty satisfied with it. Thanks again to everyone whose been reading and reviewing and favoriting me and alerting the story. Lol I feel so loved. And thanks again Kim! I meant it, you really are a life saver. :D**


	20. Chapter 20

Adelina's POV

I waited patiently until he fell asleep to slip out of his warm embrace. Though I desperately wanted to stay, I knew that it wasn't right. In the morning, he wouldn't recall anything that happened between us and some part of me wanted it to stay that way.

On one side, I wanted him so badly it hurt. I lusted after him mind, body, and soul. It was wrong and dangerous I knew. But I couldn't care enough for it to matter. I would do anything to get him. On the other hand, I was maddened with guilt. My treachery ran so deep and so true that it was all I could do not to pull the pistol from its holster at my hip and blow my brains out.

So, I decided to run from my feelings for once. I was tired of facing my problems head on. For once, I just wanted that mind-numbing relief. I wanted to think that everything was alright.

I found Roe and one of Dog Company's medics sitting together talking quietly. I couldn't imagine what they were talking about. When they spotted me, they both stood up. The concern was evident on their faces and I gulped anxiously.

"I managed to get him to sleep," I muttered, sinking into a chair beside them. Eugene placed his hand over mine in a comforting gesture. I smiled at him and then turned my attention to the other medic.

"Are you from Dog Company?" I asked him curiously. He nodded emphatically, holding out his hand for me to shake.

"Yes, ma'am. Name's Jacob Frisk. And you've gotta be the same Adelina Jones everyone's been talking about." I laughed, liking Jacob already.

"Yes, I am. And what exactly have people been saying about me, Frisk?"

"The usual crap about how you were melting Sparky's heart. Personally, I don't think Speirs has it in him to fall for a girl. He's too damn stubborn to realize his own feelings," Frisk replied honestly. Then, seeing my fallen expression, he smiled apologetically.

"But, hey, maybe you'll be different. I know that wife of his must not be doing anything right by him." I nodded, completely unconvinced.

"What a birthday this is turning out to be," I muttered. Eugene started beside me.

"It's your birthday?"

"Yes, Eugene, and I forgive you for not being on top of things for once," I said, swatting him playfully on the arm.

"Well, that's mighty generous of you, Adelina. And Happy Birthday by the way. And you're what? 19? 20?" I giggled, unable to keep the heat from rushing up my neck.

"You know how to flatter a girl, Eugene. No, I'm actually 23 today."

"No shit!" Frisk laughed, slapping his knee, "Sparky is one lucky son of a bitch, ma'am. If you don't mind me saying so." I laughed, joy temporarily flooding every sense.

"Thank you very much. I'd like to think that he is." Frisk clapped a hand over mine and squeezed it.

"Believe me. I've only known you five minutes and you've already entranced me. I think Speirs is wrapped around your little finger. Like I said, he's stubborn. It'll just take a little push and shove for him to fully realize it."

"I hope you're right, Frisk."

***

_October 17, 1944_

_Schoonderlogt, Holland_

I awoke to the sound of something pounding on my door. I rolled over, facing away from the door, and covered my head with my pillow.

I could still taste _him_ on my tongue. Feel him. Smell him. It seemed that all my dreams for the past few days were centered on him.

_Knock. Knock. Knock. _

"Oh to hell with ya!" My insult was muffled by the pillow and I fumed a little more when the pounding became more insistent. I groaned heavily and flipped out of bed. Not caring that whoever it was would see me in less than appropriate clothing, I ripped open the door. My flaming eyes softened when I saw Dick take in my appearance and then close his eyes, the shame burning his cheeks. I knew neither of us had gotten over the fact that he had feelings for me and I was making it even more difficult for him. I ran inside the room and grabbed my jacket and pants. I put them on as quickly as I could and then went back to the door. Dick's eyes were still closed shut. I patted his arm gently.

"Coast's all clear, Captain," I told him. He smiled slightly and took a deep breath. Most likely to calm his frayed nerves.

"Uh, Sink's all riled up about something. I've got Nix downstairs waiting in the jeep. He wanted us all there five minutes ago." I clutched at the back of my neck.

"Oh, bugger! Dick, I swear you're going to kill me one of these days," I replied, already running around the room looking for my socks and boots. I found them hidden discretely beneath the bed.

"What does he want me there for anyway?"

"I would imagine he wanted to have a word with you about how you're doing in the field. Speaking of which, I haven't talked to you since that night-," Dick began, but I cut him off. He was on the verge of bringing up the night Ron was injured. And I was still slightly sore about it. Just as I'd predicted, he'd been ignoring me for the better part of two days. He'd managed to push his buttons and got out of going to the rear for recuperation in a base hospital. And to top it all off, he'd gotten out of the aid station a week before he should have been ready.

Just as I thought,he had been ignoring me for the better part of two days. Although, it seemed that we'd been running into each other more often. I didn't know if that was God's way of punishing me for being a home wrecker or Ron's. I wasn't sure anymore where I stood with him. Every time I told him how I really felt, he would push me away. If course I realized that he had a wife. But I hadn't known that when I fell in love with him. I was already planning to explain all of this to him.

"Dick, I'd rather not talk about that. Long story short, he's been ignoring me again. So, it doesn't matter what happened anyway," I said. I tied up the laces on my left shoe and then hopped to my feet. Dick was looking at me with a strange expression on his face.

"Ready?" he asked, sounding unnerved by my casual demeanor. I couldn't blame him. Every other time we talked about Speirs, I always managed to burst into frantic tears and use his shoulder as a handkerchief. I realized that a part of my heart was bleeding for Dick as well. For what could have been between us and what he was still suffering through. I desperately wanted to please both him and Ron, but I knew that in the end, I would have to choose one or the other.

"Yes, let's go and see what the good Colonel requires."

I sat in the back with Dick, looking at anything but at him or Nixon. I was still half-asleep and I needed time to gather my thoughts before talking with any of 2nd Battalion's chums. My heart lifted on the idea that Speirs might be there as well. But I quickly dispelled any hope when we entered HQ. Moose was standing by the door. I immediately threw my arms around him and kissed him on the cheek.

"Hey Moose. Sink call you too?" Dick asked as he came in after me. Moose nodded.

"Yeah, whatever it is, he's not happy." I watched Sink's mustache twitch as he called our attention to him.

"Nixon, Heyliger, Miss Jones!" Sink called us over and motioned with his hand for us to join him. I noticed that Dick's face fell a little. He was staring after Moose and Nix longingly, wishing that he was back in command of Easy. I squeezed his hand before going over to Sink.

"Miss Jones I'm sure you're wondering why I've brought you here. And I thought our guest might be of particular interest to you. Lieutenant Heyliger, Captain Nixon, meet Colonel Dobey of the British 1st Airborne." I gasped at the sight of a very familiar face. I had to stop myself from launching myself at him. The smile that overcame his features at that moment was indescribable. He looked ecstatic to see me. A moment passed where we just stared at each other. At last, he held his arms open and I ran to him.

"Oh goodness, John! I never expected to see you again during all of this," I said as I motioned at the chaos surrounding us. He nodded, kissing my cheek.

"I know exactly what you mean, darling. In fact, I think I had a worse scare than you. We were all wondering if you'd been killed on D-Day. You can't imagine what a relief it was when I got the transfer request from Colonel Sink for you. Of course, I wasn't all that happy to let you go." Everyone was staring at us, and I blushed slightly. I smiled at his words, deeply touched that they'd all been worried about me.

"Well, it seems like a congratulations is in order, Colonel. The last time we saw each other, you were only a Major. But, you know, there'll be time for us to catch up. I'll just pop out for a moment," I told him quietly. He nodded understandingly and turned back to the others. As I leveled with Dick, I heard what Strayer was saying to him.

"I want an inventory on anything the British 43rd left behind. Rations, medical supplies, anything."

"An inventory, yes sir." A smile twisted my lips skywards. I could hear the bitter frustration in Dick's tone of voice. And I knew just how to make his job a little easier.

I started away from HQ as fast as I could only to end up on my rear as I knocked into someone. I jumped to my feet before they had the chance to help me up.

"I'm terribly sorry. You'll have to excuse me," I said to them, unaware that black eyes were now boring into the back of my head.

Speirs' POV

I threw down the pencil in my grip to the floor. I had been desperately trying to write a letter to my wife. We hadn't talked once since the scene in Aldbourne when Adelina and I had been on the verge of our first kiss. I grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked hard on it. I grit my teeth, but did nothing to stop the surge of pain that shot through my nerves. It steadied me. But only for a moment. The pain was replaced by absolute pleasure as my dream unexpectedly rushed through the walls I'd built in my mind. It was just flashes of images, but it was the best dream I'd ever had.

"_Of course I came," she said. Her sweet voice seemed to penetrate my very core. It shook me. Terrified me. Thrilled me to the brink of ecstasy. It was all I could do not to throw myself out of the bed into her arms. On impulse, my fingers swept along the tender flesh of her neck to her pulse point. Her heartbeat was thundering beneath my touch. I stared up into her eyes, drawn to them like no other. I was slowly realizing that I wanted Adelina like none before her. Not only did I want her body. I wanted her mind. Her very soul. It was what caused me to lean toward her. I had to know what she was thinking. Then, the logical part of my mind spoke up. _

You're married. Think of your wife. Sitting at home all alone while you're satisfying your libido._ The other part of my mind, the winning part, had to snort. My wife was less than lonely at any moment in her life. My anger flared at the thought that even now, she was probably in the arms of another man. Every time I came to her when we were on leave, I could smell him. Them, whoever had been in the house besides me. Sometimes, the smells were faint. Sometimes, very strong. As if he'd left only minutes before my arrival. She would always smile as sweetly as ever and walk over to me and kiss me on the cheek. Not since our wedding day had we kissed each other on the lips. _

_I glanced back up at Adelina and gave her a small smile. Her watery green eyes settled something inside me. _

"_You're nervous." It was a statement, not a question. I could feel her anxiety pulsing through her veins. _

_Something close to hesitancy flashed in her eyes before she nodded. I turned my eyes to the floor, wondering how far I should let her in. Before I had decided, my fingers had guided hers toward my own pulse point. She gasped at feeling my pounding heart. I wondered if she could feel what I could. That our hearts were beating as one. It was the single most miraculous thing I'd ever experienced. _

"_Ron, I love you," Adelina told me in a whisper. My stomach dropped and I felt light-headed all of the sudden. She'd said it before. But this time, it was more special somehow. No woman had ever told me __they loved me and the fact that it was coming from this beautiful, perfect creature before me was...mind blowing. Suddenly overcome with passion, I pulled her flush against me and kissed her exposed neck. She tasted even better than she smelled. I was shaking and I could tell that she noticed. Her small, delicate fingers tightened around my shoulders. I continued to kiss along her skin, finally hitting a really sensitive spot. Her head fell back and that soft moan ignited something within me. I could feel the tightening in my pants, desperate for attention. I sought her lips out. They were what we both needed the most. They were supple and inviting. Warm and comforting._

I grabbed the same patch of hair and tugged at it until my eyes were nearly watering from the pain. Why couldn't I get her out of my head? Her lips, her hair, the delicate curves of her body were all but driving me insane. I knew that the night I'd been injured, something between us had changed. And I couldn't remember a thing. Rage overtook ever sense and I pulled myself from my chair, knowing that I should get out of the room that seemed to be swallowing me whole.

I couldn't explain why I was angry. I only knew a blinding rage that made me want to kill her and kiss her all in the same breath. She was my ending and my beginning. I'd sworn since the first day that I saw her that I would stay away. I couldn't afford distractions any more now than I could have then. And I refused to allow her to have so much control over me. So, I would do the only thing that I could do. I would ignore her until she was no longer a distraction.

Adelina's POV

I slumped down onto a crate in the supply room of the aid station, completely drained. I just hoped that it wasn't too late. I had just taken an inventory of all the medical supplies the British 43rd had left behind, just as Strayer had asked of Dick. I stood up quickly, clutching the inventory sheet to my chest. I heaved a sigh as I walked out, greeted immediately by Roe and Spina.

"You been in there an awful long time, Adelina. Sparky in there?" Spina asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows. I rolled my eyes.

"Go ahead and check. If he's in there tell him I said hi. He certainly won't listen to any of my attempts."

"Trouble in paradise?"

"Leave her alone, Spina, huh?" Roe said and gave me a hug. When he pulled away again, he held my face between his hands and traced the dark circles under my eyes.

"You look exhausted, Adelina. You been sleepin' lately?" I shook my head and smiled sheepishly.

"I have. Just not very well," I admitted. Roe dug in his medical bag. Finally, he withdrew his hand and placed two sleeping tablets in my mouth. I pushed them back toward him, shaking my head.

"I don't need these, Eugene," I said, causing him to raise his eyebrows, "I honestly don't need them, Doc. Save them for someone who will. I've just been having bad dreams is all."

"I don't blame you. Anyone who has dreams of Sparky has got to be complaining of nightmares," Spina said.

"Spina, if you're not careful, I'm going to shove you off the bed." I winked at Eugene, giving him a small hug.

"Yeah that'll be the day." I walked by him and indiscreetly hit the side of the bed with my hip. He was lying on the very edge of the unstable aid station bed. The disturbance caused it to tip over. Eugene and I were bent over laughing while Spina righted the bed.

"It's real funny now until somebody gets hurt," he said, rubbing the small of his back. I gave him a quick peck on the cheek before dancing out of his reach.

"I hate to say I told you so but I did warn you," I said with a chuckle before going out of the aid station, headed in the direction of Dick's quarters. I hummed softly to myself, taking in the soft light of the sky as the sun sunk below the hills. I had never seen anything more beautiful.

That was when, for the second time that day, I fell over because I hadn't been paying attention to where I was going and knocked into someone. This time, however, I made the mistake of looking up at who it was. I knew instantly who it was. Those black eyes could never have belonged to anyone else. I could sense the seething anger rising within him. It was radiating off of him in uncontrollable waves. They were hitting me without restraint, making me shake to my core. What had I done? Was he starting to remember what happened at the aid station?

I shrank away from him, knowing that the flood tides were about to break through the dam. I didn't say anything, only stared at him. I waited with baited breath for him to make his move.

"Miss Jones," he said with a cold formality I had not known from him since the beginnings of our strange relationship.

I replied with the only thing I thought appropriate. "Lieutenant Speirs." Something in his eyes glinted, but vanished before I discovered what it might be. The world was spinning beneath us. But the only thing we could care about was each other. It was erotic, terrifying, dizzying. It was as if a thousand words were passed between us. But during the entire thing, we never once said any thing else to each other. I would never recall how many minutes, how many hours, lifetimes, flew by before he finally wrenched his gaze from me and brushed past me. We were touching, but we had never been farther apart.

When he was gone, I felt something inside me break. Whatever could or would have been was over. I had messed it up by pushing too far. And I knew that if I was ever going to get through the rest of the war without killing myself, I would have to put it at the back of my mind. Forever if necessary. I tried to look into the future for a moment to see what life might look like. It was too painful. So, I turned my attention to the immediate future, knowing that was the only way I could survive it. I would endure in silence because I knew that was the only way I could get over it.

I walked away from that place with my head held high and my spirits lifted by the thought of seeing Dick again. When I was alone, I would weep over my loss. Not now when it was my turn to finally be there for someone. I knew that Dick was having a hard time. And I hadn't just spent the better part of a day making up a list of medical supplies for nothing.

**Okay, definitely not what I had in mind either. However, the show must go on. Obviously a ton of angst in this chapter. Not promising that the next one will be any less depressing. But I can tell you that there is a little bit of lemon on the horizon. Possibly although it may not be with who you think. lol that's all i will say until next time. **

**And thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter. :D**


	21. Chapter 21

**Not to give anything away, but this story is rated M for a reason. The following chapter contains sexual content. You have been warned. :D**

Adelina's POV

I knocked softly on the door and was immediately let in by a man I didn't know. He was as tall as me with dark brown hair that was slicked to the side and dull, brown eyes. He gave me a small, curious smile as he asked me who I was. Before I'd answered, he caught sight of my uniform, which served to intensify the questions behind his eyes.

"Adelina Jones. I'm here to see Captain Winters." He stepped aside hesitantly and led me up the stairs.

"I wasn't aware that there were women on the front lines," he said, slightly condescendingly. I rolled my eyes at his rudeness, choosing not to say anything. The sound of a typewriter floated down to us. It filled me with sadness, knowing that all he ever did now was file paperwork.

"Captain Winters, there's a Miss Jones here to see you," the man said as he arrived at the top of the stairs. I followed closely behind. Dick glanced up at us, his eyes lighting up when he took in the sight of me. I gave him a warm smile.

"Hi, Dick," I said happily.

"Hi, Adelina. Could you give us a moment, Szalinsky?" I watched the frustration flash through the man's eyes before he nodded in acquiescence. When he was gone, I leaned toward Dick.

"And who, may I ask, is he?" Dick chuckled.

"Szalinsky. Why is everyone asking me that today?" To the questions burning in my expression, he replied, "Lew and Moose were in here about an hour ago asking me the same thing." I nodded and then went to sit on his bed. I sat cross-legged on it after taking off my shoes.

"You planning on staying for a while?" Dick asked, motioning at my abandoned boots. I blushed, taking what he'd said the wrong way. I bent over to grab my boots and made to put them back on.

"Sorry," I said, embarrassment coursing through me, "I shouldn't have invited myself to stay like that." He was by my side in a moment, taking my hands in his to prevent me from leaving. I couldn't hide the spark that was ignited by that simple brush of skin on skin. Dick cleared his throat and let go of me.

"I didn't mean for you to take it that way, Adelina. You're more than welcome to stay. Although, I'm afraid I won't be much company. I was just starting on that supply inventory Strayer wanted," Dick explained. A sigh of relief stopped just short of my lips. I smiled in understanding and then handed him the list I was still gripping for dear life.

"Here, I drew this up for you today. I wasn't sure if you'd need it or had already asked for it. But I decided to take my chances." Dick looked over it and grinned.

"You took an inventory of all the medical supplies?" I nodded, blushing anew at the wonder in his expression.

"Thank you, Adelina. That saves me a lot of trouble." Unexpectedly, tears erupted in my eyes. I gasped, my hand quick in wiping them away.

"Adelina, what did I say?" Dick asked as he moved to wrap me in his arms. I stood up quickly to dodge the action.

"It's nothing. I suppose I'm just overly-sensitive today," I said in an attempt to appear nonchalant. But Dick, ever aware of what I was feeling, came up behind me and grabbed my shoulders.

"Adelina, what's he done now?" I faced him, glad that, for once, tears weren't running down my face at the thought of what Speirs had done. I looked up into his expectant blue eyes, wondering if I shouldn't talk to him. Even though he'd told me that he was getting over me, I couldn't help but feel like every time I ran to him with my swollen eyes and shaky voice it tore at him a little more inside.

"Tell me what's wrong." Those four words were enough to reassure me that no matter his feelings about me, Dick was first and foremost my friend. He was more than willing to listen if it meant that he could help me. I took a deep breath, preparing to relay the events of the past week.

"The night that Ron was wounded, we sort of…kissed. But he's been ignoring me for the past three days. And a few minutes ago, we bumped into each other. He was so cold and distant. I'm afraid I've lost him by trying to get too close." Dick's eyes were swirling with thoughts and emotions. Several minutes passed us by, silence the only noise in the room.

"You haven't lost him, Adelina. If anything, you're even closer to getting him to fall in love with you." My head tilted out of curiosity.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, if I know Speirs, he has a need to always be in control. So, in an effort to do that, he's staying away from you. You're making him feel things he's never felt and it probably scares the you-know-what out of him." I chuckled, glad for the hundredth time that I'd come to see him. He always made me feel better. I kissed him softly on the cheek.

"Thank you, Dick. I can always count on you to make me feel better." He returned my smile and hugged me once before letting go.

"It's no problem, Adelina. What are friends for?" he asked. I could see no regret or pain in his eyes as he unknowingly reassured me that he had no problem with us just being friends. I smiled again and made to leave.

"I worked hard on that, Dick. So, make sure you take good care of it."

"I will. Thanks again for doing it for me."

"No problem."

***

_October 22, 1944_

Speirs' POV

Everywhere I turned, I saw her. In the dark wood paneling of my room, I saw her auburn curls. In my dark green ODs, I could see her green eyes staring at me. It was driving me crazy.

I ran an unsteady hand through my hair. She didn't know what she did to me. I hated to admit it, but something about her was breaking down my walls. It was unnerving, but I wondered what it would be like to lose control just once. As I was thinking, I saw something out of the corner of my eye that had me looking up in surprise. It was her.

She was facing away from me. My eyes roved over her swaying hips in amazement. She was going to be the death of me, I knew. But I didn't care enough to force myself to look away. I watched her stumble over her feet before finally grabbing a nearby chair to right herself. She shook her head a little, the auburn curls brushing her cheeks. She let go of the chair and tried to take a step forward. Her knees seemed to buckle underneath her and she fell to the ground. Fear and confusion gripping my heart, I started forward without a second thought.

I wrapped her in my arms and pulled her against my chest.

"Adelina?" I asked, my voice shaking audibly. She whimpered and looked up at me with glazed eyes.

"Ron?" I swept her hair from her face.

"I'm here. Tell me what's wrong."

"I'm so tired," she mumbled. I nodded and swept her up in my arms.

"Adelina, where are you staying?" When she didn't answer, I looked down at her and couldn't help the smile that appeared on my lips. Her eyes were closed and her chest was moving rhythmically up and down. I grappled with a decision. Should I go to Winters and ask him where she was staying? Jealousy warped my mind. For some reason, now that I had her, I wanted her all to myself. So, I did the only thing I could do. I started off down the street to my own quarters. I opened the door and walked up the stairs with her cradled against me. I crossed the room and laid her gently on the bed. Hesitantly, I kissed her forehead. Her slender fingers tightened around my arm.

"Ron?" Her voice sliced through me with the force of a thousand knives. I pulled away to look down at her. She was staring up at me with a desperation that pulled at my heart strings. Without thinking about what I was doing, my thumbs traced the dark circles beneath her eyes.

"You're exhausted," I told her simply.

"Mhm," she muttered, her eyelids falling lazily over her dark green orbs. My Adam's apple bobbed in tune with my rising pulse. Before I did something irreparable, I let my hand drop from her face. Her eyes flashed open and I could see the passion and fire hidden in their depths. I found myself wanting to know what inspired such emotion from her.

"What happened the other night? At the aid station?" I asked her, my voice surprisingly calm. Her eyes shifted to her lap and then back to me. The guilt and the torment in her expression only served to pique my curiosity.

"Please tell me, Adelina." My use of her name seemed to wake her up. She blushed suddenly.

"I kissed you." My thoughts were scattered.

"You…kissed me?" I echoed. She nodded sheepishly in affirmation. _I wish I could remember it. _

"You'd been given morphine. So, if you don't remember it, that's why." I glanced at her, an idea forming in my mind. My fingers trailed languorously up her arms to rest at the nape of her neck.

"Would you mind if I tried to remember?" I asked. In response, her hand closed around the front of my uniform and tugged me toward her.

"I'll take that as a yes, then," I said with a smirk before pressing my lips to hers. It was even better than I'd dreamt. I was caught up in the passion and arousal she was building in me. I was hardly aware that I'd pushed her back into a laying position. Her body felt delicate beneath mine. It was warm and supple, inviting me to touch every inch of it that I could. My stomach was clenched in knots at the thought of making her my own tonight.

_Mine. _The sense of possessiveness was almost too much as her moans escaped around our frantically joined lips. I pulled away and moved to her neck.

"Ron." She whispered my name as if it were the most precious prayer in the world. I sucked in a breath, bringing the smell of her through my nostrils. She smelled like strawberries and freesia. The scent was sending my mind twirling. My hands were aching from want of exploring the unchartered lines and curves of her small frame. I felt her arch under me when I kissed a sensitive spot on her neck. A moment, slipping easily into eternity, passed by.

At last, her breath strayed across my ear. "Ron, make love to me," she said. It was simultaneously a plea and a command, which I was only too willing to carry out.

"I thought you were tired," I said with a smirk before beginning to fumble with the buttons of her jacket. She sat up so that I could slip it from her shoulders and throw it to the floor.

"I'm not that tired," she said with a light grin. My fingers looped around the bottom of her white shirt. Staring warmly at me, she lifted her arms for me. She bent forward and kissed me once before her arms folded behind her. I heard the back of her bra being unclasped and let my eyes fall closed in exalted expectation. When I opened them and saw her bare chest, I couldn't help but gasp. I could see the doubt in her eyes that I would accept her; I leaned forward and kissed her urgently.

"You're beautiful," I whispered before leaning backwards. I pushed her softly back onto the pillows and just stared at her. A smirk played across her lips.

"Am I going to have to do all the work myself? Or were you planning on touching me some time today?" she teased. I bent my face to give her the attention she so deserved. I took one pink bud between my lips and sucked, eliciting a sharp moan from her. Her fingers became knotted in my hair, holding me to her. I moved to the other one and did the same. She arched into my mouth. I grinned against her and kissed her breast one last time before moving back to her lips. As our tongues fought for dominance, I could feel her fingers working at my jacket. It wasn't long before she had moved down to my pants. Noticing my own urgency, I brushed her hands away and undid my own zipper. She followed suit and in no time at all, we were both completely naked. I stared at her, my own insecurities getting the better of me as she stared at my throbbing member. She seemed to sense it because she pulled me into a bruising kiss. I moaned unexpectedly when it got to the point where I didn't know how much longer I could wait. I pulled away, my hands on either side of her head just managing to hold me away from her.

"Ron, please," she muttered. It was enough to quell my doubts. As slowly as I could, I slipped inside her. Her walls squeezed me, teased me as I went further in. I noticed the tears pricking at her eyes and kissed them away.

"Are you alright?" I asked her, concern overriding my want of pleasure. She nodded, her legs coming up to wrap around my waist. I pulled out completely before plunging inside again. Her scream wrought the air, filling me with satisfaction.

"Ron, faster," she said breathlessly. I could only comply. I pushed inside her, filling her completely over and over. Sweat covered our bodies. Our hearts were pounding as one. Our mouths opened to emit one continuous moan.

At last, she tightened around me. I could feel myself approaching the brink. I wished this moment could last forever: a moment of ecstasy poised before a downward, contented spiral of passion. My lips found their way to her ear.

"Come for me, Adelina," I whispered, my frantic breathing accentuating the raw need and want in my voice. With a final scream of my name, she came in spasms. I followed closely behind with my own orgasm. I slumped against her, my forehead falling to against her breast. I could hear her pulse starting to slow. Her arms tightened around me, holding me close. Neither of us wanted to move. I pulled out of her, both of us groaning in immediate need for the closeness again. I rolled to the side and then drew her to my chest. Her eyes closed and she breathed a sigh.

"No matter what tomorrow brings, I won't ever regret this night," she told me softly. I drew the covers over us and nodded.

"I won't either," I told her. But I realized she couldn't hear me. She was asleep.

**So most certainly not what I had expected. If you have anything at all to say about this chapter, please please please review. I am in desperate need of feedback! I got a review from captain ty and seqz last chapter. Thanks so much to them. They were my inspiration for this chapter and I can't wait to hear their thoughts. So, for my sake and yours, review. It's especially important for this one since I've never written Speirs smut before. And if you want it to happen again, I'd like to know. Or if you thought it was complete crap, I want to know that too. **

**Okay, I should have another update by next week. I'm starting school next Monday, but I will be trying to get an update out at least once a week. :D**

**Yeah I don't own the men on whom this story is based. And I don't own the Band of Brothers series. But, I do own Adelina Jones, so don't steal her!**


	22. Chapter 22

Adelina's POV

I opened my eyes to something I never expected. Ron was staring at me, no barrier to the emotions he was feeling. It was slightly unnerving to see him so open. For a moment, we stared at each other until he smiled and I blushed. I couldn't help but notice that the only thing separating our bodies was a thin sheet. My heart was pounding as I traced the hard contours of his torso. Beneath my fingers, his muscles twitched and strained. I smiled slightly before glancing back up at him.

"Good morning," I whispered softly, the only thing I could really manage to say. His black eyes shown brilliantly with amusement. My eyes narrowed slightly at him.

"What's so funny?"

"I'm not laughing," he said sarcastically, "I just find it interesting that there's only this little sheet covering you up." I giggled.

"So eager for an encore are you?" I teased. He laughed. I realized that it was the most beautiful sound in the world. Even better than just the sound of his voice. It thrilled me to know that I was the cause of his good humor. As I swam in my thoughts, something changed in him. My eyes focused on the frown on his lips and the slight pucker between his eyes. Concern the driving force, I brushed my hand across his bare forearm.

"Ron, what is it?"

"Did you mean what you said about not regretting last night?" he asked me suddenly. I stared at him in shock. That hadn't been what I was expecting. And truth be told, I didn't know what I thought he would say to me.

"Yes I meant it," I replied simply. He nodded and then settled back onto the bed. I felt dizzy. Was I missing something? Was he just a lot less complex than I'd thought before?

"That's it?" I asked in disbelief. I felt him chuckle beside me.

"Yes."

"Are you regretting this?" I asked him, suddenly concerned that was the reason for the unease rising in my stomach. He looked me in the eyes, not saying anything. I couldn't read the emotions in his expression anymore. But I could feel the way his fingers suddenly looped around the sheet covering me. He leaned forward and brushed his lips with mine. My breathing hitched and my blood began to boil.

"I'm regretting the fact that I ever let you hide under this sheet for so long," he muttered against me. Through my sex-hazed mind, I barely registered what he said but it was enough. I rolled away from him, knowing that putting distance between us was the only way I would be able to concentrate.

"That doesn't answer my question, Ron. And seducing me isn't the way to avoid giving me an answer," I said, suddenly furious with him. Why couldn't he ever be straight-forward? Why did he have to be so damn difficult to understand? I threw the sheet from me so that I could put on my clothes. I could feel his eyes on me, taking in every inch of my bare skin. I slipped into my uniform as quickly as I could.

"Why are you leaving?" he asked, his own voice betraying anger and hurt. I finished the laces up on my boots before deciding to answer him.

"Because you're an ass who it seems only wanted me to sleep with him. You men are all the same. It's all you ever want!" I shouted and made to stand up. My fingers had closed around the door handle before he started after me. He grabbed my arm and twisted me around.

"When did I ever say that I only wanted to be with you for the sex, Adelina?"I faltered, seeing the need to understand in his eyes. I swept a lock behind my ear and took a deep breath.

"It's nothing, forget it," I muttered. The heat radiating from his body was almost too much for me. I longed to wrap him in my embrace and hold him forever. But reality had a way of catching up to you that you never expected. All the secrets I'd kept buried deep inside me had a way of showing up whenever I was with him. Last night, I'd been able to keep the memories of those sweltering nights in Fleischer's quarters at bay. Now, staring at him, it was all I could really think of. I was ashamed, not of having sex with Ron, but of myself. I'd allowed a man whom I'd never felt anything for but hatred take the most precious thing from me. I was not innocent, not pure as I wanted to be for the man before me. Instead I felt like I had betrayed my country, betrayed him, and most of all betrayed myself. I stared at the floor, feeling like the most terrible person in the world. I knew that I couldn't tell him the truth, but I didn't know how to avoid answering him for very long.

"Don't tell me to forget about it, dammit! I want you to tell me what the hell is going on? Why are you acting like this all of a sudden?" _Because I love you too much to tell you the truth. _

"I have to leave. I was supposed to be back at the aid station last night. Everyone is probably wondering where I am," I told him quietly. I turned around, only to be grabbed by him again.

"Would it make a difference if I said that I didn't want you to leave?" My stomach clenched painfully and I felt my eyes fill with tears.

"Ron, I don't think I can do this. Last night was perfect," I told him, trying desperately to maintain the steadiness in my voice, "but, I just can't. You have a wife and as much as you disagree with me now, down the road, you'll be happy that you stayed with her. You're going to go back to England after the war and you'll make the most beautiful children together. And you'll grow old together and you'll think of me only as a distant memory. And that's how it should be, Ron. Why spoil your marriage when you have every opportunity ahead of you to make it work and be happy?" Rage boiled behind his eyes.

"Because I don't want to be with her, Adelina. I never did. I've already explained all of this to you. I don't want to go back to her after the war's ended. I don't want to have children with her. I don't want to live happily with her and think about you as if what we have is anything less than it really is. I can't walk away from you now, Adelina. Fuck, last night...something happened between us. I won't pretend to be romantic, because I'm not. And I never will be. I think you already know that though. All I can really say about it is that I think I might be in love with you, Adelina. You've told me that you love me too, and I'm promising you right now that I'm leaving my wife after the war."

"You can't promise me that, Ron. Life takes you to places you never expected sometimes and oftentimes, you can't always keep your promises. No matter how much you want things to work out for you." Before I really knew what I was doing, I swept his strong fingers from my arm and twisted the doorknob. As soon as I opened it, his hand came down hard on it, knocking it back into place. I twisted around, seeing the rage rising in him again. It was unlike anything I'd ever seen. There was rage, but there was also pain, fear, and sorrow.

"I'm not done talking to you. You can't just decide what's going to happen to me. I don't want you to leave me. I can't let you leave. Now that I've got you, I can't imagine life without you." Tears leaked from beneath my half-closed eyelids. I sniffed, brushing them impatiently away.

"And you can't decide what happens to me, Ron. I'm leaving, whether you like it or not. I'm not saying that we have to stop seeing each other. We can be friends, can't we?" He stopped staring at me, his eyes slipping slowly to the floor. For a moment, I believed he wasn't going to answer me. Finally, he answered in the coldest, most distant tone of voice he'd ever used with me, "No, I don't think we can." He removed his hand from the cool wood panel of the door and sat down on the bed. He never looked up at me again and I felt a rush of fear flood my veins. The carefully built up walls around my heart were crumbling and I was suffocating under the weight of trying to keep them steady. With a shaky sigh, I opened the door and closed it after me.

I walked deliberately toward my quarters, my legs threatening to fold beneath me with every succeeding step. Out of the back of my mind, a small voice began to mutter.

_Maybe this is what you needed. Perhaps you are starting to realize that the only thing that could come between the two of you is purely physical. You can move on now._

The voice was so convincing that I almost began to believe that I would be able to move on. But even now I was beginning to regret what I'd said. He'd finally let me in only to find that I was pushing him away.

_But he didn't let you in. He couldn't even answer a simple question. _

I shook my head to clear it, not watching where I was going. I bumped into someone, my face shooting up into the sun light almost instantly. As my pupils readjusted, I could make out the shape of a very familiar face.

"John?!" I asked, my hand coming up to shield my eyes. He laughed and patted me on the arm.

"Good morning, Adelina. Have a nice night? You never came round to congratulate your poor countrymen on managing to escape from the clutches of the Huns," he teased, managing in an instant to bring my mood back up, if only a little bit. I grinned, my heart still doing somersaults from a few minutes ago. I fell into step beside him, my arm looping around his.

"You know, I could have sworn that last night was a rescue mission, John. That implies that the Yanks were out to save your arses."

"So its your now? Are you not still a Brit, Adie?" he asked, using the old nickname he'd given me what seemed like many years ago.

"I don't really know what I am anymore, John. War sort of breaks down those nationality barriers that my parents always tried to instill in me. And spending so much time with these Yanks has given me a taste of what I could do after the war is over. I've been considering selling my parents' property and moving to the States." A small smile crept onto John's face.

"It seems like you've put a great deal of thought into the matter." I nodded my agreement.

"I have. Almost as soon as they found me, I couldn't help but think that I'd been given a second chance at life. I had to wonder what I would do with it. They left me for dead, John," I said, my eyes misting over slightly as I reluctantly relived that horrendous experience. He must have felt the change in me, for he stopped and wrapped me in a comforting embrace. He smoothed my hair, humming softly in my ear. I noticed, with some sense of irony, that it was the tune for "Somewhere Over the Rainbow."

_October 31, 1944_

_Driel, Holland_

"Luz, would you be a dear, and turn up the wireless?" I asked Luz from where I was sitting watching the boys play poker. They'd forbidden me from playing after I pooled in over a thousand dollars from the last time I'd played with them.

"Why does everyone in Europe call it a wireless?" Luz grumbled as he obliged, "It's called a radio for Christ's sake." Lip smirked at me as I turned to George with a fake smile plastered on my face.

"You know, I'm so happy that you've taken up Guarnere's reputation for being a complete smart-ass to me."

"I'd be careful if I were you, George. Adelina's been pretty fiesty these past few days. Ever since we got here."

"Well, this is the first time that my feet have been dry in two days, Lip. I was out there on the line just like the rest of you." Lip rolled his eyes.

"You didn't have to be out there. You know, I recall a certain Lieutenant Welsh who told you that you'd be miserable. You could have stayed here, but you Brits are so prideful that you just had to go out there," Luz remarked from his sitting place.

"Oh, bugger off George," I said with a grin, knowing that I'd been beaten. He winked at me.

"You boys play nice. I'm heading out to the Company CP," I said, grabbing my medical bag and my helmet from beside me. Luz wiggled his eyebrows at me.

"Going to see the Moose again?"

"No, I'm not," I replied, blushing furiously. I'd been going to the CP nearly every night to go and relax with Moose, Welsh, Nixon, and Dick when he was there. In their company, it was easy to forget about my own troubles and they never harassed me about _him._

"She's blushing!" Luz said, clutching his sides from laughing so hard.

"You ain't moved on from Sparky yet have you?" My thoughts scattered, my mouth forming the replies before my brain really had a chance to catch up.

"No-I mean yes-no...I'm not really sure," I lied, knowing full well that I was about as close to not loving Ron Speirs as I was to suddenly stop breathing. Lip seemed to sense my discomfort, because he waved me off.

"Go on, get outta here. Don't let these jerks get the better of you," he told me, sending me a wink when I gave him a watery smile.

I felt my heart thumping erratically in my chest as my mind was able to wander again to Ron. He seemed to be everywhere. My thoughts continued to travel to him in my rare spare moments and it was slowly driving me crazy. I knew that I'd ruined whatever there was between us in a matter of minutes. I was terrified that I would never be able to repair it. I'd realized that lying to him wasn't the way to confront my problems. I knew that I had to tell him the truth so that he could make his own decisions about me. I'd been wrong to assume his intentions with me and I knew that in order to win him back, I would have to start by being honest with him and myself again. I wanted to talk to him about it soon. I just didn't know how to get in touch with him. Thankfully, I had finally reached Easy's CP. I strode up to the door and knocked on it. To my surprise, Nix opened the door.

"Look what the cat dragged in," he muttered with a grin on his face. I rolled my eyes and pushed lightly past him.

"Nice to see you too, Nix. Where is everybody?" I asked, noticing for the first time how quiet it was inside the small building. Nix shrugged and returned to the chair he'd been sitting in before I came.

"Dick and Moose left about ten minutes ago. They're on their way out to Welsh's CP on the line. It was Dick's idea. He's so stir crazy, he asked Moose if he wanted to go out and inspect the line with him tonight. If you hurry, you should be able to catch up with them before they get too far," Lew replied, his face hidden behind the pages of an intelligence report. Grateful, I walked over and kissed him on the cheek.

"Don't let Sparky see you doin' that," he said, having enough sense to look a little embarrassed by the gesture. I chose to ignore what he'd said for the sake of my own sanity.

"Thank you, Lew."

"Anytime, kiddo." I smiled and then left the CP, anxious to get to Dick and Moose as fast as I could.

The only thing I could hear was the crunching sound my boots made as I hastened toward Welsh's CP. Although, in no time, I could catch faint snippets of conversation. One voice was most certainly Dick's. The other I wasn't so sure about, but I knew that it must have been Moose.

In a heartbeat, everything changed. In a second, it felt like I was cascading into a spiral of chaos. A shot and a cry of "Moose!" suddenly sliced the air, filling my ears and scorching my insides. I didn't think about what I was doing. All I knew was that suddenly, my legs were moving quickly and powerfully beneath me. I felt like I was flying. And then I came to a grounding halt as someone came running toward me at almost the same speed.

"What just happened?" I asked them, knowing somehow that they had come from the direction of Moose and Dick. I recognized him only vaguely as being from Easy. His bright eyes were shifting uneasily from side to side and his face had been drained of all its color. I could see that he was shaking horribly.

"I-I-I-," he stuttered, unable to form the right words. I approached him cautiously and set a hand gently on his shoulder.

"It's okay. Just tell me what happened so I can help, Private," I told him, making my voice calm yet authoritative. He gulped audibly and then took a deep breath.

"I shot Lieutenant Heyliger. Captain Winters sent me to get Lieutenant Welsh. His is the nearest CP." I nodded and clapped him on the back.

"Alright, you just stay with Winters. Tell him I went to go get Welsh," I told him. Without further conversation, I moved away from him and ran off in the direction of Harry's CP. My legs were throbbing, and my heart was pumping faster than it had ever done before, but I wouldn't stop. I knew that I couldn't stop even if my legs threatened to fall off. I couldn't explain it, even years later, what drove my instincts that night. But I just knew that getting to Welsh as fast as I could was the only thing that I could do. Somehow, I knew that I didn't have the necessary supplies in my bag to do anything for Moose. At least, I couldn't do anything better than Dick could do with his aid kit.

When I got there, Harry was sitting with his arms crossed over his chest, his helmet pulled so far down over his eyes that I could have sworn he'd been sleeping. But as soon as I shouted at him, he jumped up, alert and ready for whatever I was going to throw at him.

"Harry, Moose has been shot. You need to get a jeep and pick him up. Dick's with him. They're about a mile down the road that way," I said, pointing to the direction from which I'd come. I started to run away again, before Welsh called after me.

"Hold on a second. Where are you going? You aren't going to wait for the jeep?" I shook my head.

"Get on the radio and tell Luz to tell Roe what's going on. I'll meet you guys back at the aid station, Harry." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him nod. I didn't wait for him to get a hold of Luz or Eugene. I could make it back to the aid station faster on foot anyway. I figured that the jeep would take at least ten minutes to get Welsh and then another three minutes to get back to Dick and Moose. And then another five to get back to the aid station. I considered it a source of pride that I could make that same trip in little more than fifteen minutes.

Make it I did. Although my victory felt more like a failure as I skidded to a halt just outside the aid station doors. An ambulance was parked there, Dick and the pale-faced Private standing behind it. They were staring off into the distance, obviously waiting for the jeep with Harry and Moose to arrive. I jogged toward them, feeling utterly breathless. When I saw the look on Dick's face, I really started to worry. He looked terrified, more scared than I'd ever seen him before.

"Dick, everything's going to be fine," I muttered, clasping his hand in mine reassuringly. He nodded slowly.

"I hope you're right," he said as the sound of a running engine came within earshot.

_December 15, 1944_

_Mourmelon-Le-Grand_

As it turned out, I had been right. Though, it had been a very close call. Harry and Dick, too terrified to really be thinking straight, had given Moose three surrets of morphine, enough to kill any man. Thankfully, Moose had made it and was now sitting in a hospital bed in the rear. He wouldn't be coming back to the front. We were all happy that he would be going home, returning to the peace and sanctity of a life that was even now beginning to return to some semblance of normalcy. It would be a long haul before he would be back to his old self, but I had faith that he he would pull through.

With Moose leaving, a new commander for Easy had to be found. Much to all of our disgust, a complete idiot in the form of Lieutenant Norman Dike, had been his replacement. We all had a theory that he was the favorite of someone up at Division. Lipton had told me in confidence that he felt like Dike had been placed with Easy so that he could get more combat experience before continuing on his way up to another rung on the social ladder. All of us hated him and Along with our complete baboon's ass of a CO, many new men had come to replace those that we'd lost in the heat of battle and to various wounds of all shapes and sizes. The only men who were now holding Easy together were the NCOs, men who'd been with the Company since Toccoa.

I sighed, thinking about all of this as I made my way to Dick's office. I was tired of trying to pretend that everything was going to be okay. Because I knew as well as any of the Toccoa guys that if we were to be placed in combat now, a lot of us were going to be killed. Foxhole had no idea what he was doing and the replacements had a tendency of getting not only themselves shot, but also guys who were battle hardened and were only trying to protect them. Before another idea came mind, I bumped into someone.

"Whoa there, I know you must be anxious to see me, but there's no reason for ya to knock me over, kid," a very familiar voice with a Philly accent said from above me. In astonishment, I looked up at Guarnere. Not thinking twice about it, I threw my arms around him and squeezed him tightly. He'd been gone for nearly two months after getting in that motorcycle accident.

"Damn, Adelina, you've got a strong grip. I guess you really did miss me," he said, trying desperately to try and peel me away from him. I stepped backed and blushed.

"Sorry, I was wondering when you were coming back," I exclaimed excitedly. Guarnere grinned and ruffled my curls. He threw his arm around my shoulders and started to walk with me in the direction of Dick's office.

"So you're on your way to see Winters too?" I asked him. He nodded and glanced at me with a slight grimace on his face.

"It true what Moose told me?"

"What did Moose tell you?" I asked, overly-curious.

"That Winters is behind a desk now?" I stared at him, my eyebrow shooting upwards. Then, I remembered that he'd been wounded about the same time that Dick had been promoted to Battalion XO.

"Yes, it's true. Now we've got Foxhole Norman ordering us around. Just wait until you see him, Bill. The man has no idea what he's doing half the time." Guarnere laughed loudly as we stopped in front of Dick's office. Szalinsky, who'd been walking in front of us the entire time, opened the door and told Dick that there was a Sergeant Guarnere here to see him. I heard Dick's mumble that he could come in before Guarnere hobbled in in front of me.

"Look at what the train brought in," Harry said as we came in. I laughed, taking a seat on the spare seat beside Nix while Guarnere saluted the two officers and then Dick.

"Yeah, the daredevil's back for more apparently," I told them.

"Hiya, Captain," Bill said as he approached Dick's desk. They clasped hands, Dick welcoming him back softly.

"Adelina was just telling me that its true you're behind a desk now, sir. I never thought I'd see the day." Dick smiled faintly. I could tell that he wasn't overly-cheerful about being reminded once again that he'd been forced to leave Easy in less than capable hands.

"Maybe someday, he'll sit behind it," Nix said, the amusement glinting in his eyes as he shook Bill's hand after Harry.

"Well I just AWOL from the hospital, sir. I hope that won't cause you any trouble."

"Would you care if it did?" Dick asked him, a ghost of a smirk playing on his lips. Guarnere looked at him with equal amusement.

"Not a bit, sir." Bill dug in his uniform a moment and pulled out an envelope.

"Got a letter here for you from Moose, sir. Lieutenant Heyliger," Bill said, handing it carefully to his former CO.

"He's recovering, but they keep telling him it's gonna be a long haul," Guarnere continued. Dick glanced at Harry, who had the same guilty expression on his face.

"Thanks Bill."

"So, I hear there's gonna be a football game. With those chumps in the five-oh-deuce, is that right?"

"Oh yeah," Welsh replied with a smile.

"Christmas day," I added, seeing with a slight sense of satisfaction that I'd beat Harry to it. He winked at me and then turned his attention back to Bill.

"Great. Sky-train boys. Can't wait," he said. Dick didn't say anything and I could tell that Bill was getting slightly uncomfortable just standing there.

"Great," he said one last time, "Well, uh, I think I'll just go find some trouble." He saluted Dick, who returned the gesture, and then started for the door. Before he'd gotten there, Dick stopped him.

"Oh and Bill?"

"Sir?"

"No more joy riding, alright?" Guarnere just nodded his agreement. Then, as if he'd only just remembered, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny slip of paper.

"Has anyone ever heard of a little joint called LuLu's?" We all shook our heads. He waved it off.

"I think I'll just ask around. See you later, kiddo," he said, winking at me before walking out of the office. Szalinsky came and shut the door, offering Nix the perfect opportunity to tell Dick something important. He leaned forward in his chair, his eyes glinting.

"Now's as good a time as ever, I guess," he said and pulled a piece of paper from his jacket. Dick looked at it, his eyes closing for a moment in aggravation.

"If that's a piece of paper, I don't want to see it, Nix." Lew smirked.

"Why don't you let me tell you what it is first?" he asked his friend, "General Taylor's in Washington. He's left the Division in McAuliffe's hands. Colonel Sink is in Reims to see Marlena Deitrich at the USO."

"Marlena Deitrich is in Reims? Well that's it, I'm going to Reims."

"Strayer's going to be in London at least another week for Lieutenant Colonel Dobey's wedding. And I am going to Aldbourne to look up a certain young lady.

"What are you saying, Lew?"

"So, you my friend, are going to Paris. This is a 48-hour pass. It's been decided that you need a dose of civilization." Nix handed Dick the pass and clapped him on the shoulder before turning back to face me.

"And you know who else will be headed to Aldbourne?" he asked me, a slightly more serious expression on his face. I stared at him in shock, not knowing what he was talking about. He licked his lips before opening them.

"Speirs. He was supposed to be leaving right now."

**Dun-Dun-Dun...Okay so a little less dramatic than I had hoped for the end of this chapter. But I honestly had to end it somewhere. I'm hoping, though, that this makes up at least a little of the pain and suffering I might have caused you from withholding this update from you for so long. I'll have you know that right now, I should be in bed dreaming of Ron Speirs wiping me off my feet, but instead, I chose to finish this chapter for you guys. So as a thank you, please please please send me a review or a PM or whatever. I crave feedback and even with the smut last chapter, I think I only got three reviews. So, yeah, feeling a little less than loved right now. But sezq, captain ty, and pirate-muffins-13 were fricken amazing! Because they reviewed last chapter. They were my inspiration, especially captain ty for kicking my butt into gear tonight and doing everything short of demanding that I get this out. No wait, she did that too. But no seriously thank her because otherwise this probably would have been out tomorrow night. :D**


	23. Chapter 23

Adelina's POV

I stared at Nix in shock, not wanting to believe what I had just heard.

"Ron is leaving for England?" Nix nodded, his eyebrow twitching upwards for a moment out of curiosity, "Did something happen between the two of you, kid? You look as pale as a ghost." I waved off his comment by going to the door. I stopped in front of it, my fingers poised over the knob.

"I'll be fine. Where is he?"

"He's staying at a house on the west side of town. It's big and white with a red door I think," Lew replied, his eyebrows scrunching together as he tried to remember what the house looked like. I nodded and started to leave.

"Thanks Lew. I'll see you boys later," I said, my voice echoing and permeating the air around me. I walked as quickly down the hall as I could, carefully avoiding men and numerous filing cabinets just to get out. My heart was pounding with anticipation. With the fear that I wouldn't make it in time. It almost seemed like this was the moment I'd been waiting for. The point where I had to divulge everything or live with the awful consequences for the rest of my life. And it felt like it had caught up with me at last. And I was in no way to try and stop it. I realized that Ron deserved to know the truth about me. I wanted to be honest with him. I needed to be honest with him.

When the beams of sunlight shined on my face, I knew I was free. I started to run, my legs throbbing hard and fast beneath me just as they had that night in Driel. If I wasn't so terrified, I might have enjoyed it. I ran through the streets, ducking between the mass of men that seemed to be moving in a constant wave opposite me. Every once I would have to shove through them, bit I couldn't find it in me to care. I was starting to wonder if I would make it all until a break in the crowd allowed me the perfect view of a white house with a dark red colored door. I grinned helplessly and bounced up the steps, taking them two at a time. I pounded on the door, leaving no room for whoever might be inside not to hear me.

"Coming!" I heard someone's muffled yell. Through the heavy door, I couldn't identify the source of the voice, but I prayed to whatever God might be listening that it would be Ron. I shifted restlessly from foot to foot as they opened the door. My eyes closed for a moment and then I was looking at him. I was surprised that he hadn't changed at all. The stubble covering his jaw was just as dark and made him just as ruggedly handsome as ever. His dark eyes were glinting in the pale sunlight as he stared at me, his mouth opening slightly with surprise. And he was raking his fingers through his hair, the only indication that he was nervous.

I managed a small smile before muttering, "Hi, Ron." I could feel the anger swelling inside him, but it simmered down after a few moments.

"I didn't expect to see you here," he said before turning around and walking back inside. I followed him, feeling dizzy.

"I know, neither did I," I said, "It's just...I heard just a few minutes ago that you were leaving?" I stated it as a question so that he had the possibility of proving me wrong.

"Don't over analyze this, Adelina. Whether you want to be with me or not, I have to go back to her."

He continued his way up the stairs to what I assumed was his bedroom. My pulse was rapidly increasing and I was finding it hard to breath as I followed close behind him.

"But I do want to be with you," I managed to choke out. I knew that I was slowly losing my control over the situation but I couldn't give up. Not yet. He turned on me, the rage evident in his expression.

"I think you want to be with me because I'm the first man who you ever fucked!" he shouted, his black eyes glistening dangerously. My eyes widened in response, my head moving back and forth slowly.

"Don't say that," I muttered, feeling my heart breaking into small shards and poking me from the inside. I couldn't help but believe that I really had ruined us. He was on me in a moment, his face only inches from mine, his fingers closing firmly around my wrists. Even given the situation, I felt a small jolt in my stomach from the close contact.

"Why can't I say that? Because its true? As hard as it may be for you to believe, I have feelings too. I told you that I loved you and you started deciding that I would be a lot happier without you. Seems now you're getting your wish," he said. With that, he let my hands drop to my sides. I felt my knees give out under me and I slid helplessly to the ground.

"Don't go. Ron, please. I'm sorry," I said, the tears beginning to roll down my face. He had crossed the small room and was grabbing his bag to leave. I watched him with watery eyes, wondering what his next move would be. I was mesmerized by every flick of his wrist, every tilt of his head.

He turned around in response to my plea and looked at me with no emotion in his eyes as he said, "I have to go. And your apology means absolutely nothing to me. You can't take back what you said, no matter how much you regret it now, Adelina." I watched him leave without reacting. Then as if it had been the calm before the storm, the tears suddenly began to fall from my eyes in torrents. I couldn't tell how long I had been there before I finally awakened as if from a nightmare. Somehow, I had managed to get to my feet and walked over to his bed. I was clutching the unmade sheets as if they were my last chance at life. Not caring how pathetic it might be, I crawled under the bed after kicking off my shoes and buried my nose in the pillowcase. His scent was all around me and only then could I fall asleep, somehow able to dream of nothing.

Speirs' POV

The silence and unease permeating the air was nearly too much for me to handle. I hadn't returned to Aldbourne for any other reason than to divorce Maria. Now, I found myself unable to say anything. The scene between Adelina and I kept repeating itself inside my mind, ruthlessly attacking the point where I was the most vulnerable. Being here with my wife wasn't making anything easier either.

She'd ambushed me as soon as I knocked on the door and told me something that I knew would change my life forever. I knew that if I hadn't ruined things between us already, then this news most certainly would. I wondered how she would react to it, and then I realized that I was doing it again. I couldn't believe that I'd made myself think that staying away from her would keep me from falling for her.

_It was a pretty piss poor effort on your part though, _a small voice in my head remarked. I thought about the way I'd held her for the first time in Carentan, how she'd told me about her desperate attempts to save her sister, how her bare skin had felt against mine as we made love. I closed my eyes, pretending that I was with her now.

I sneered at myself, unable to deny or prove that the voice in my head was wrong. I almost wished that I'd never met her or that I didn't find her so attractive. It would have made things much simpler for me. But I was realizing that no matter what I could have done to prepare myself for Adelina nothing would have worked. Something about her was so enrapturing. It was a wonder that I wasn't competing with anyone else for her heart.

I needed a drink. But I'd already tried to get rid of her that way. Nothing I did could shake the feeling that she was always with me. That's why it had hurt so much to leave her. I resisted clutching pointlessly at my bleeding heart. In this moment, it was easy to remember what it was like to hate someone so much. She'd hurt me worse than anyone in my entire life. Not even getting my two men killed on D-Day had hurt this much. And the most painful part was knowing that there was nothing I could do. I couldn't say anything to get her back and it was killing me not to get on the next boat to France so that I could see her again. I didn't know that I could feel so horrible, both inside and out.

My eyes refocused on my wife's subtly distended belly and I felt like I would throw up at the sight of it. I didn't want her to be carrying my baby. I wanted it to be Adelina instead. I could imagine her in this quaint little cottage that I'd bought for Maria little more than a year ago. I could see Adelina with a protruding belly, her face glowing as she cooked dinner or folded laundry. And she was the most beautiful sight. Maria, however, disgusted me. But even more than I hated Maria, I despised myself more. I wished that I could take back what I'd said to Jack all those years ago about taking care of her if he was ever killed in action. Now I was stuck in this situation, unable to get out no matter how I looked at it. I couldn't even tell if the baby was mine or not. The last time we'd had sex was in August, before the almost-kiss that night in front of the bar.

"Are you going to say anything, Ron?" Maria asked me, her voice thick with tears. I stared at her, unable to believe what I was hearing.

"You've had almost four months to get used to the idea of this baby, Maria. Can't you give me five god-damned minutes."

"It's been twenty, Ron." I glared at her, suddenly wishing that the baby wasn't mine. I asked her aloud if she even knew who the father was. Before I knew what she had done, her hand came up and made contact with the side of my face. I reached up and rubbed the tender flesh.

"Please don't try and act innocent now, Maria."

"You've not been honest with me either, you stupid bloody Yank! I'm sure you've been spending your nights with that whore haven't you?" Rage overthrew my senses and I stepped toward her, my movements lethal.

"Don't call her that, Maria. She's twice the woman you'll ever be. And if you want my take on the whole baby issue, maybe it would be best if you didn't bring her up in the conversation again. Don't forget that this is my house and I'll throw you out if I damn well please," I cautioned her, my voice low and menacing. Maria didn't fall for it. She knew me too well, that or she just hoped she did.

"You wouldn't throw the mother of your child into the street, Ron. You're not that cruel," she said. And in an instant, the hatred in her eyes for me disappeared to be replaced by that seductive smile she always used to get me in bed with her. I shook my head, silently willing her to stop.

"Maria, I can't do this right now," I muttered, but her hands were already sliding down my chest to my belt. I felt her thick thighs move against my hand and I wondered how easy it would be to forget Adelina and my pain for just one night. Then I imagined how much it would hurt her. Somewhere deep in my heart, I knew that even though we'd hurt each other, I still couldn't imagine being with another woman physically or emotionally again.

I pushed Maria gently away, my hand unexpectedly caressing her stomach. I couldn't help the swell of pride within my breast at the thought that it might be my child. But I was able to push it to the back of my mind almost as soon as it had come.

"Maria, do you want to know the reason why I came back to see you? I had every intention of telling you that I was leaving you today. But then you come to the door and you're pregnant. And as much as I hate to say it, that changes everything. You're right, I can't just throw you out on the street. Because that might be my baby. So, I'm telling you now that I'll continue to support you, but I'm not your husband anymore. I'm in love with someone else and nothing you say will change my mind. Just be happy that you're still getting my paycheck." With that, I grabbed my gear and left the house, not making the effort to even turn back to see her reaction.

I couldn't make myself care about her, not even when she was carrying my child, if I was even the father. Perhaps that was why I couldn't respect her, even after everything I'd ever put her through. I had made a promise to her ex-husband to take care of her. But she could have easily turned me away.

I shook my head, not really caring enough to ponder the matter for too long. It seemed that all my mind was capable of thinking about for any significant length of time was Adelina.

Adelina's POV

I wandered slowly down the road, wondering briefly where everyone was. Until I saw a familiar face, his shoulders hunched as he bowed his head against the stiff wind. For a few seconds, I watched him from afar, admiring the luster of his black hair. I'd never really noticed how attractive Eugene was until now.

_Not as attractive as a certain Dog Company Lieutenant, _a small voice couldn't help but remark as I hastened to catch up with him.

"Eugene! Where are you headed off to?" I asked him, intentionally exaggerating my interest so that I could think of anything else but Ron.

"Just off to the aid station, Adelina. Where are you goin'?"

"Nowhere in particular. Mind if I join you?" my voice cracked a little at the end and Eugene gave me a strange look.

"Course you can," he replied. We walked on in comfortable silence, my heart hammering in my chest. This was a bad idea. What had I been thinking? I was about two seconds from dropping to my knees and pouring my heart and soul out onto the cobblestoned street. I tried desperately not to think about it. Not to think about _him_. But it was like forgetting to breathe. It just wasn't possible in any sense of the word.

"Adelina, are you okay?" Roe asked as he held the door into the aid station open for me. I nodded weakly, the water works already trying to force tears out of my eyes. His fingers wrapped around mine and gave them a light squeeze. It was supposed to be comforting, but it was a reminder that I had to be strong. There was nothing I could do now to change what I'd done.

"Gene, please, I can't talk about this right now," I pleaded with him. I glanced over at him to see his sad smile.

"Alright. But you do realize that you'll have to tell me sometime. I have a feeling that we're going to be staying here until probably spring. At least that's what Captain Nixon's been saying. So Easy's gonna have to survive on gossip about you and Sparky for entertainment." It felt like a stake was being driven repeatedly through my heart. I wondered if the pain would ever go away. I pushed the thoughts from my mind with little difficulty. I was realizing that it was easier to just forget.

"You talk to Nixon in your spare time, Gene?"

"No, I've just heard him talking to Captain Winters is all," Roe said, his accent showing through as he tried to defend himself. I giggled.

"So you've been eavesdropping on the conversations of two officers? I'm sure they could court-martial you for that, Mr. Roe," I said with a wag of my index finger. Realizing that I was teasing him, a mischievous smile crept onto his lips. He suddenly reached forward and started tickling me. I let out a peal of laughter and tried to fight him off.

"Stop, stop, stop," I said, unable to wrap my mind around any other word. At last, he stepped back and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I hope I taught you a lesson," he said with a smirk. I grasped my throbbing ribs, glaring at him all the while.

"What lesson was that?"

"Not to tease me."

"Consider this my promise that it will never happen again," I told him just before someone burst through the aid station doors. It was Luz.

"Adelina, Roe, Captain Winters wanted me to tell you two that we're moving out in an hour." I stared at him in confusion.

"We're moving out _now_? But we're short on equipment!" Luz shrugged resignedly.

"I don't know what to tell you, Adelina. Other than to tell you to shove as much shit in that bag as you can." I grimaced and then turned around to do just that.

"Thanks for telling us, George. Eugene, why don't you leave your bag with me? I'll fill it up for you," I told him, holding my hand out expectantly. He handed it to me, hesitating slightly.

"Are you sure? You don't need to pack or anythin'?" I shook my head and grinned at him.

"Nope, I'm all set on that. You just go and pack. I'll give this back when we're getting on the trucks."

***

I tugged my jacket tighter around myself as a sharp gust of wind rattled through the flap on the back of the truck and rolled down my spine. I had been shivering nonstop for the last two hours. And it didn't help that the truck seemed to be traveling more slowly as the minuted ticked by.

I was jerked from my thoughts when someone lightly elbowed me in the side.

"You got a lighter, kid?" Guarnere, the owner of the elbow, asked me. I stared at him for a moment before the question really registered. A grin wound its way onto my lips.

"I can do you one better, Gonorrhea," I exclaimed and dug through my pockets for that allusive rectangular box. When I found it, my fingers tightened around it.

"You have to promise not to tell anyone else," I whispered in his ear and handed him the cigarettes. His eyes grew wide.

"Holy shit, Adelina! Why the hell have you been holding out on us?" he shouted, just as I knew he would.

"Adelina, you had cigarettes and you didn't bother to tell any of us? We knew you were cruel, but we've been sittin' here freezing our asses off while you have these tucked away in your pocket? You and Sparky are perfect for each other," Muck said and stuck the end of the cigarette in his mouth, not aware of how much his flippant comment was hurting me.

_Just don't think about him. Don't think about him. Don't think...._ I kept repeating that in my head until I was sure that I would be able to speak again without breaking down.

"Need I remind you that I've been in the same position," I told him and then handed the lighter to Guarnere. He took it and lit his own smoke before handing it off to Malarkey. The empty pack was thrown out the back of the truck, allowing a flurry of snow to enter. Muck let out a sigh of satisfaction as he blew smoke out of his mouth. I looked at him with curiosity.

"Is it making you any warmer?" I asked him. He nodded and then handed me the cigarette. I took it and fastened it to my lips. Hesitantly, I drew the smoke from it and let it burn my lungs. Warmth spread from my mouth to the tips of my toes.

"Holy hell! And I just gave you lot the only ones I had!" I gasped after I'd given the cigarette back to Muck. The men in the truck laughed at me, the sound bubbling on my lips before I finally began to giggle too.


	24. Chapter 24

Adelina's POV

The trucks came to a jolting stop, sending my shoulder clashing against Guarnere's. He winced slightly and then winked at me as I opened my mouth to apologize.

"No harm done, Adie. I think my arm'll survive this one," he explained. I rolled my eyes, unable to stop a small smile from curling my lips.

"Better luck next time I guess, Bill," I snickered. As the tailgate dropped, Bill and Buck slid out of the truck, followed closely behind by myself and the rest of the platoon.

"Alright, fellas, ten minutes," Buck explained before walking off in another direction. The boys went off on their own, some relieving themselves beside the trucks, some lighting up another cigarette. I hugged my jacket tighter around my body and went looking for Eugene. I could feel my medical bag swinging lightly against my leg. My heart sank a little. Filling up our bags hadn't been very successful. Not only were the men of Easy lacking in supplies. So was its medical personnel. I'd been able to scrounge fourteen bandages, seven surrets of morphine, and three tourniquets to divide between Roe, Spina, and myself.

I found Eugene leaning with his back against first platoon's truck.

"Hey, Gene." He managed a weak smile before motioning to his bag.

"So I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that you didn't find a whole lot in the supply room?"

"No. Although, I might be hoarding all the good stuff. You never know," I joked. Roe smirked and reached across me to snatch my bag. My stomach jolted when I felt his hand graze against mine. Our eyes met and I blushed when I realized how close we were.

"Sorry," he muttered and withdrew his hand. At that moment, I felt the hairs rise on the back of my neck. I could feel someone's eyes boring holes into the back of my head. I twirled around and saw those black eyes that I would never mistake for anyone else's.

My heart fell to my knees, making them buckle beneath me. My fingers tightened around the canvas covering the cab of the truck so that I could hold myself up. Despite the cold, my skin was on fire, a growing heat writhing and twisting just beneath the surface as I got lost in his gaze. Before I knew what I was doing, my legs were carrying me toward him.

"Adelina, where are you going? We're heading out!" Roe called after me, his voice able to force me to a halt. It took all my strength to turn away from him. And I felt myself breaking apart all over again. I choked back a sob and latched onto Roe's hand, half-afraid that if I let go of him, that I might fade into the distance like a dream that slips away even as you try to remember it.

***

I opened my eyes and saw the fog lying in dormant wisps all around the edges of the foxhole I was in. The chill in the air sunk through my clothes and filled my bones with a dull ache that I couldn't get rid of. Shivers rolled down my spine and up my arms, making my body a plane for one continuous tremor. I sighed heavily, more exhausted and hungry than I had ever been in my life. And this was only the beginning. Only God knew how long we would be stuck out here. I sighed, knowing that I had to get out of the foxhole and get moving. Above ground, I could hear a few man laughing. Others were shouting orders. The sound of a spade prying dirt from the earth was a symphony that made me want to stay here and listen til the end of my existence. But too soon, Luz was back and was eager to kick me out of the foxhole.

"Come on kid, you've had the hole all to yourself for the last two hours. I'm exhausted. I've been on OP duty off and on all night."

"Why? Because our foxhole is done?"

"Yeah, that about sums it up. Just about everyone else is still working on theirs."

"Even Malark and Skip?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"Just curious. I think some gloating is in order," I told him as I crawled out of our foxhole. He grinned and clapped me on the arm.

"You be careful, kid," he told me as he stifled a yawn.

"I will as long as you promise to get some sleep, Luz."

"I don't think I'll have any problems with that, Adie." I smiled at the nickname. It reminded me of a time when life was less complicated. For a moment, I let my mind wander back to those sweltering summers in my grandparent's house. I dreamed of steaming apple pies, the cool breeze as I helped my grandfather pick the blueberries from the fields, the smell of my grandmother's perfume. And then, it was gone. I felt a single tear drop leak from the corner of my eye and plunge downward. Before it had rolled off my skin, a finger ghosted across my cheek and caught it. I gasped, my eyelids splitting apart. Green orbs met black and I couldn't help the twisting of my gut or the buckling of my knees.

"Ron?" I whispered, my legs aching with the effort of holding myself upright. He stared at me, his lips never parting to utter a word. I stared back, his eyes searching the depths of my soul, for what I had no idea. Suddenly, it became too much and I lurched toward him, my fingers threatening to close around the front of his uniform. Then, he was gone. My hand grasped the empty air and a small sob escaped me. I sunk to the ground, not caring about the snow surrounding me.

"Please come back," I muttered, my arms tightening around my abdomen as if I was holding myself together, "Ron, I need you." The cries shook my body, intensified by the bitter cold soaking through my clothes.

Was he hurting as much as I was? Did he care what he was doing to me at all? Couldn't he understand that I was going through this for him? I realized that he didn't have a clue what I was suffering through. And why should he? I was the one that had ended it. By being so self-sacrificing, I had given up the best man that had ever wandered into my life.

The worst part was that it was all my fault. Because of what one man had done to me, I couldn't find it in me to trust Ron to still want me after he found out. Perhaps the real root of the problem was that I couldn't know what his reaction would be. Maybe I was scared that he would be mad at me. Angry for not defending myself and going for help the moment that twisted bastard had laid a hand on me.

And Fleischer seemed like the worst of my problems when I thought about my own sick past. The mother who went along with everything that her husband told her. The father that drank until he passed out nearly every night. And the fact that on one of those occasions, he'd invited a woman into our home. A complete stranger. I could remember the night clearly in my head. It had been around about two in the morning when I heard whispering outside my door. My father, mistaking the room for his own came in and pushed the woman onto the bed. I'd been forced to listen to the sounds of their fornication, unable to cry out, unable to move, unable to do anything. I couldn't tell my mother, although I had an idea that she already knew about it. I was just glad that it had happened to me and not Sarah, who had been five at the time.

Something occurred to me then. I was living in the past. I wished that I could change all that had happened to me. But I couldn't. There was nothing I could to change the past, but I could change the future. It wasn't too late to save whatever might be left between Ron and I.

The first real glimmer of a smile twisted and pulled the muscles of my mouth upwards at the corners. I could feel myself began to hope. Until I heard the sounds of an incoming barrage. I had barely pulled myself to my feet when I saw a mortar round land less than two feet away. On instinct, I hurled myself to the left, the explosion missing me by mere inches.

"Holy shite!" I exclaimed and stood up once again. I heard the cry of medic resounding through the trees. I took off at a run towards the sound, recognizing the voice instantly at Bull's. I gripped my medical bag as if for dear life. I passed a foxhole, not even bothering to look and see who was occupying it until one of them jumped out after me and dragged me backwards.

"Where the hell you going, kiddo?" Muck asked me with a slight smirk. The call for a medic was heard once again.

"Does that answer your question? Dammit, Don, let me go!" I shouted, struggling against all my might to get out of the grasp Malarkey had me enfolded in.

"Doc's already on it, Adelina. He left about five seconds ago."I relaxed instantly.

"Why didn't you just say so then?" I asked them with a smile. Muck rolled his eyes and smacked my leg.

"You're feisty when you wanna be, kiddo. I'll give you that. No wonder Sparky likes you so much." I blushed instantly, earning a cheeky grin from both of them. The blushed slowly faded from my cheeks, bringing with it the remembrance of why I was here anyway.

"I think I'll start gloating now about how your foxhole is only half-way finished. Luz and I finished ours earlier this morning."

"You and Luz are sharing a foxhole?"

"Is he trying to get himself killed?"

"Oh shut up! Speirs isn't going to kill the man for sharing a foxhole with me. Besides, you lot are missing the entire point. I'm trying to tell you that Luz and I-," I tried to emphasize I, "finished our foxhole before just about everyone else."

"Yeah we're still stuck on the fact that you and Luz are sharin' a hole."I rolled my eyes and sighed, convinced that I wasn't going to get it through to them.

"Wait! You mean you and Luz finished your foxhole already?!" Malarkey cried in disbelief. I stood up, smiling in a self-satisfied way, as the last of the shells hit the trees on the border of the forest.

"Thank you. That's the reaction I was hoping to get from you."

"No problem, I guess," Muck replied, still surprised by what I had told them. I grinned as I walked away and made my way towards where I knew Bull's foxhole was. I passed by Babe's foxhole and squatted down next to him.

"He okay?" I asked him in a whisper as I looked at the shaking Julian in his foxhole. Heffron glanced at me and nodded.

"Yeah, you know it's always the first one is always the hardest," he told me, shaking himself though more from the cold than anything else. I nodded and then clapped him on the back.

"Take care of yourself, Babe."

"How is it that you and Spina can call us by our names and the Doc can't?" I shrugged, not really knowing what to tell him. Heffron waved his hand and settled back into his hole. I sighed and then continued on my way, soon finding Bull's hole in no time. I knealed down beside it, seeing the bandage wrapped around Penkala's arm.

"You okay, Penkala?"

"Hanging in you know? I don't want to be moved off the line."

"You'll be okay, Penk, we don't have an aid station. There's no way of getting you off the line just yet."

"Yeah, Doc just told us as much." Penkala looked disgruntled about something and Bull was trying really hard not to laugh.

"What the hell's so funny?"

"Oh nothing, 'cept Penk thought the artery in his arm had been hit. He was freaking out pretty bad." I chuckled, trying to imagine the scene. I clapped Penkala on the back and kissed him on the cheek.

"Alright, tough guy, take it easy on the arm, okay?" I told him, earning yet another booming laugh from Randleman. I began to walk away when someone grabbed my hand.

"Adelina?" I turned around and threw my arms around Dick. It felt like forever since we'd last talked.

"Good afternoon, Dick," I said, not having to try to put on a smile for him. His bright blue eyes took me in in a matter of seconds and then he allowed a smile to curve his lips.

"Hi, Adelina. I was just wondering if you were okay?"

"Dick, we've only been out here since yesterday." I told him, thinking the answer would be obvious. His eyebrow raised.

"I think you and I both know that isn't what I'm talking about." For a minute, my mind took me back to that room in Mourmelon. And I thought that I'd felt pain then.

"Why do you have to do this to me now, Dick?" I muttered softly, my fingers tightening around his arms. He pulled me to his chest and smoothed down my hair. I smiled when I felt him kiss the top of my hair.

"I'm sorry." I shook my head and leaned backwards to look up into his face.

"No, I'm sorry. I am alright, just a bit frazzled. We had a fight before he left to go back to England. And I still don't have any idea why he went back there. He said that he had to be with her, but I don't know what that means. And then before the barrage, we saw each other. He didn't say anything. I think I might have messed everything up, Dick," I confessed, at least some of the burden coming off my chest at having told someone else. Dick tucked me back into his chest and shook his head.

"You just have to give him some space is all. I'm sure he wasn't happy about you yelling at him, Adelina."

"He was a right shot angrier than I'd ever seen him. That's for sure," I told him with a small chuckle. It was getting easier to breathe and I knew it was because I still had hope for him to come back to me. Dick laughed with me and then kissed my cheek.

"Alright, I've got to get back to the Battalion CP. Nix is due back any moment," he told me. I nodded in understanding.

"Tell our Intelligence Officer that I said hello."Dick smiled.

"I'll do that. Take care of yourself, Adelina. And come by the CP sometimes to tell me you're okay."

"I will. I promise." I watched him walk away with a slight sense of sadness. I'd missed him since he'd been promoted. I shook my head, knowing that I should have known the day would come. Dick was a great leader and as much as we'd all have liked for him to stay with us, it wasn't to be.

I sneered. Now we had Foxhole Norman, who was hardly more than a passing thought unless you needed him for something. If I knew anything, it was that the only men who were keeping Easy together, were the men who'd been with the company since Toccoa. I wondered at the fact that they had so easily accepted me into their arms. Then, I realized that I didn't care the motivation behind it, just that it was. I was happy, probably for the hundredth time, that Dick had found me in that ditch on D-Day. Otherwise, who knew where I would be now. I shuddered at the knowledge that there was no question of whether or not I would be dead. It would have been slow and painful. I would have bled to death and no one would have felt it.

I shook my head of those morbid thoughts, realizing that my feet had taken me straight to the edge of Eugene's foxhole. I knelt beside it and saw that his eyes were closed. His chest was rising in a gentle crescendo before he exhaled again. I stared at him a moment, noticing the way his eyebrows were scrunched together and his lips were pursed.

"What is it?" he asked, one of his eyelids revealing a very alert brown eye. I laughed slightly and slipped into the hole beside him. He adjusted his legs so we could both be comfortable.

"Where's Spina? I thought you two were always together," I said with a slight smirk. Eugene chuckled and sighed.

"I sent him out to go and try to get some supplies from 3rd Battalion. They're a lot better supplied than we are." I nodded and laid a hand on his arm.

"Alright. Why don't you get some sack time before the next barrage?" He shrugged and then eyed me critically.

"And when was the last time you slept?"

"I got a few hours this morning. I was out until around about three in the morning talking to this lot," I said and made a sweeping gesture at the rest of the men, "And then I went to bed and got up at six."

"Winters know you aren't getting enough sleep, Adelina?" My anger flared at the worry in his eyes. I jumped to my feet and crawled out of the foxhole.

"What's good enough for the rest of Easy is good enough for me, Eugene. I don't need you or Winters or anyone else deciding what's best for me!" By the time I started to walk away, I was shouting. As I started off, my fury was already ebbing away, leaving me feeling guilty. I sighed and turned around, finding that Roe was following after me. We met eyes and smiled sheepishly.

"I'm sorry, Gene. I didn't mean it. My emotions have been all over the place today." Roe wrapped me in his embrace, making a blush appear on my cheeks. He kissed the top of my head, his lips lingering there for a moment longer than they should.

"It's alright. I guess this place will just take some getting used to." I nodded and then pushed lightly away from him. I managed to smile and then squeezed his hand.

"Go get some rest, Eugene. You've got to get it while you can out here." Roe blushed and then leaned forward to kiss my cheek. He pulled back, our lips nearly touching and I found enough sense in me to step backwards. I couldn't explain why my stomach was twisting in knots and my heart was pounding hard and fast.

"Thanks, Adelina. See you later." I found that I couldn't reply or move. But as he walked away, I realized that I was getting in deeper with Gene than I would have liked to.

But maybe this is what I needed since I'd all but ruined my chances with Ron.

**Tons of angst still, which should make you all happy. Because that means the story is still going strong and has no forseeable end in sight. **

**So, a HUGE thank you to captain ty. She knows why. She's been a huge inspiration to me with her super-human typing abilities. And her constant pestering for me to get off my lazy butt and get chapters out faster. lol So that's what I've been doing. And I'm actually really surprised that I'm almost done with 25 as well. Another big thank you to sezq, who I unfortunately didn't reply back to when she reviewed. I'm wondering where all my wonderful reviewers have gone, but it's no big deal. I know people have lives and may just forget or have more important things to do than review. But I do appreciate all the hits I've gotten for this story. I think its just shy of 4000 in all since I first posted in April. So, that's a huge accomplishment and I'd love to thank all of you for making this experience so positive. **

**But anyway, that almost sounds like I'm saying good-bye. Which is not the case at all. Just wanted you guys to know I love you for giving my story the time of day. :D So, please review and I will work on finishing the next chapter! **


	25. Chapter 25

Speirs' POV

I allowed my eyes to wander as I walked along the line. It was a little past dawn. The fog hung in thick curtains all around me. It seemed to make the woods colder. It penetrated through my uniform, slowly seeping into my flesh and bones.

Against my will, my shoulders began to shake as I walked further into the woods towards Easy's position. It was a sign of weakness that I detested. However, I knew there was no getting rid of it. So, I continued on, my thoughts focusing on one thing.

_Adelina_.

As if my mind could make her appear, her slight form materialized through the fog before my eyes. I tried to quiet the pounding of my heart and my rapidly accelerating respiration rate. A primal growl worked its way up from the catacombs of my throat and reverberated in the air around me. She didn't seem to have heard me. Or if she did, she was doing a very good job at ignoring me. Even at this distance, I could see that her eyes were closed. Concerned at her lack of responsiveness, I walked toward her, watching her intently. The small whimper, so filled with the agony of things long forgotten, was enough to cause my heart to break a little more. Even after all we'd done to each other, the overwhelming sense of protectiveness I felt for her was enough to cause my hand to shoot to her face when I saw the first tear drop fall from beneath her closed eyelids. When I touched her, a jolt of electricity shot through my finger, up my hand, and surrounded my entire body with heated need. I wondered if she felt it too. A soft gasp rolled from her lips, making my heart lurch painfully. Her eyelids folded away to reveal her radiant green orbs.

"Ron?" she whispered. I found that I could not speak. I just stared into her eyes, seeing the depths of her heart and mind clearly for once. She was a tormented soul. Something from her past, more than what she'd already revealed to me, was forcing her away from me. And I wasn't sure that I was ready for her to tell me yet.

The reminder of my own past was like liquid fire in my mind. When the time came for divulging secrets, would I lie to her again? Would I fail to mention the fact that my wife was carrying my child inside her?

When she took a step toward me, I panicked. I couldn't explain it, but the need to get away from her was so great that I rushed away. But even as I left her, I could hear the fruit of her suffering. I couldn't stand it. My legs moved faster beneath me. Not quickly enough. What I heard next brought me to my knees.

"Please come back. Ron, I need you," she called, her voice conveying the same misery and pain coursing through my veins. I gripped my face in my hands and bit my lip to keep the reply I so wished to give her inside of me. The truth was that I needed her too. I'd never felt this way before about anyone. And the thought, as simple as it might have been for someone else to accept, terrified me.

Adelina's POV

It was a few hours after sunset before Gene and I found each other again. I had my eyes focused on the ground before me. The whisperings of the trees and the gently-falling snow were in my ears. The bitter cold seemed to take on a life of its own as it sucked the warmth from my skin, filling me with a sense of emptiness that made me feel as if I might already be dead.

I craved for his arms to pull him to his chest on the promise that he would never let go. That would be the only way to get rid of the maddening feelings coursing through my veins. Of course, that this wasn't in reach was as, or perhaps even more, angering than the ideas themselves. Every moment that passed, I was constantly reminded of him. Even in the most trivial of things. I wondered if I was going crazy as I realized that Guarnere flicked his wrist like Ron would do occasionally. I pondered at the fact that I had ever come to notice that he did it in the first place.

I breathed a heavy sigh, earning a throat clearing from whoever was near. I pivoted on the spot, quickly catching movement to my right.

"Gene?" I gasped, slightly breathless, as I recognized who it was. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"You seemed a little distressed just then. Anything I could help with?" I resented the mischievous glint in his eyes as he said this. Part of me desperately wanted to _want _him. But I couldn't help but feel that it was an insult to what I'd already given of myself to Ron. Now, after I'd been startled out of thinking of Ron, I could only find it in me to feel a seething anger toward him. Then, the crazed feelings passed, leaving me shaking in their dust.

"Oh no," I said, trying to put it off as nothing, "I'm fine. I was just thinking. What are you doing out so late, Gene?" I realized too late how idiotic the question sounded. So, when he directed the same question at me, I wasn't surprised.

I managed a weak chuckle before saying, "Well, Gene, I was just taking a walk. To clear my head a little bit."

"Well, I was just making the rounds. And Gordon said something about going to see Joe Toye out on the OP. You wanna tag along?" I couldn't identify the nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach. But I chose to ignore it in favor of keeping Eugene company. As we walked, I noticed how slightly I leaned toward him to get more warmth. It sickened me that it wasn't Ron who was grasping knowingly at my shaking fingers.

But I could almost pretend that it was him. I closed my eyes for a brief moment and I was transported. To another time, a different place, a new world. For me, it was enough. Even in these fleeting glimpses of him, I felt more in love with him than I'd ever felt. It left me wanting more-always more. Though, I was able to push the driving need for him to the back of my mind, contenting myself that it would work out in the end. I dared to dream that in this one thing, God would grant me a happy ending.

I opened my eyes and was met by the static horizon. Every day and every night, the quivering trees never changed. They never moved, they never said a word, but they were there. They were listening, waiting for the chance to attack us at our most vulnerable. How they would know, I couldn't guess. I had a feeling that it was just one of those things in life that wasn't meant to be answered. It just happened and we would have to prepare for it the best we could. I became dimly aware of Roe asking to see Joe's feet. I glanced down just in time to see Joe sticking his left foot, naked of boots, out of the foxhole.

"Your boots, Joe!" I gasped in surprise, "What's happened to them?" Joe sighed and shook his head a little.

"I took 'em off to dry my socks and they got blown to hell, Adelina." I grinned knowingly.

"I would have thought you'd say something about shoving them up General Taylor's arse. I'd love to do the same thing myself right now." He cracked a slight grin.

"Sorry to disappoint, Adie." There was that nickname again. Why did fate insist on throwing my past into my face time and time again?

"...trench foot. You need to change out your socks daily. Leave one pair on and dry the wet ones around your neck." Roe stood up suddenly when Toye's only reply to him was a noncommittal grunt. I sent him a sympathetic look.

"Don't you worry, Joe. I'll make sure the next time someone goes into town, they'll you get you a new pair. You're a size nine, yeah?"

"Do all the tea drinkers talk like that?" I shrugged, a smile playing on my lips.

"I suppose they do, Joe. I'm not a tea drinker myself." Both he and McClung turned around, their mouths hanging open in shock.

"Really?"

"I wouldn't lie to you. I haven't touched the stuff since I was 13." I couldn't help the cringe that was brought to the surface. I willed them not to ask the question.

"Any special reason for that?" I mentally smacked my forehead. _Dammit. _My throat constricted and I had to gulp several times to get it working again. My eyes had filled with tears and I tried with all my might to keep them inside.

"My mother was absolutely dreadful at brewing up a good pot of tea. It wasn't for lack of trying, but I'd rather drink mud than torture myself with the stuff. I would only ever drink it when my grandmother made it. She died, along with my grandfather, when I was 13. So, I haven't touched a cup of tea in ten years." They both squeezed my hands.

"No better place to realize how alone you are than out in the middle of the woods while you're freezing your ass off, huh?" McClung commented. I shook my head, knowing that I wasn't alone at all.

"But I'm not alone. I've got about 120 men to keep me company."

"Sounds sort of kinky." I rolled my eyes and slapped them both on the arm.

"Men. Their heads are always in the damn gutter."

"Yet you still love us." I rolled my eyes, choosing not to reply. I turned around and found Gene leaning up against a tree watching me with amusement. I put a hand on my hip in mock annoyance.

"You want to take the mickey out of me too?" He shook his head, chuckling the whole time.

"I'd rather not be on your bad side. Not tonight anyway. Which, by the way, when's the last time you slept?"

"Not since two nights ago, why?" He shrugged and then started off toward his own foxhole.

"Please, for my sake at least, try and sleep tonight, Adelina. Staying awake all the time isn't helping anyone, least of all the rest of Easy." He vanished from sight, leaving me with a decision to make. I couldn't tell Gene just why I didn't want to sleep. I was too afraid of dreaming of Ron. However, I knew that keeping awake for my own selfish reasons was a good way to get a lot of Easy men killed. So, against my will, I forced my legs to move in the direction of my foxhole. I found it empty, save for a lighter and a pack of cigarettes that Luz had left in his wake. I shook my head and stuck them in my pocket instead of lighting one up like I really wanted to, knowing somehow that he would want them back.

I leaned against the wall of the hole and grabbed the blanket that was lying in the corner. When I drew it around me, it made me ever more cold. After a few minutes, though, I was slightly warmer and my eyelids were slowly closing, shutting off the world.

_My skin was tingling with the feel of his skin on mine. It had been too long since we'd touched and I knew that it wouldn't be long before I would demand much more than the fleeting caresses he was giving me. For now, it was enough. Until his lips made their way to the sensitive area of my neck that __only he knew how to find. I gasped, my fingers tightening around his jacket. In desperation, I tried to pull him closer. He moaned against my lips, sending a wave of arousal through my limbs. _

"_Ron, please...." I whispered into the dark silence around us. I didn't know what I wanted from him. I realized it was more than the physical release I wished for. I wanted him. Just him. The length of a single heartbeat passed us by. Before I knew all along what I had been trying to tell myself. He was never really mine to have. _

I awoke with a jolt, my skin tingling from the ghostly lips, still half-alive, tried to pull me back into blissful unconsciousness. My heart was pounding so fast that I was finding it difficult to breathe. Tears sprung to my eyes and I doubled over from the effort of trying to push the sorrow into the deepest caverns of my mind. This was what I had been afraid of.

This dream was more vivid than I wanted. I could practically taste his essence on the air. Reality had a strange way of catching up to me. And the reality was that Ron was slowly slipping from my grasp. I wrapped my arms around my torso in an attempt to keep the last drops of warmth within me. I knew it was foolish to have allowed Ron to become so deeply engraved within my soul. But when he'd left me without saying a word, it was like I was being torn apart from the inside. In a frenzy of madness, I considered the pistol poking gently at my side. I wondered how easy it would be to pull it out and shoot myself. Not a soul could keep me from doing it. In the time it would take for them to find me, I would have been too far gone to save....

"Adie?!" My eyes turned upwards to meet the icy blue orbs that I was all too familiar with.

"Hi, Dick," I managed to choke out the greeting. To my ears, it sounded more like a farewell. Dick, forever intuitive to whatever I was feeling, dropped into the foxhole beside me. He looked at me critically, the furrow between his eyebrows deepening the longer we made eye contact.

"Are you okay?" he asked me, the tone in his voice slicing through every nerve that wasn't frozen. I gave him a weary smile and shrugged.

"I never really know if I'm alright, Dick," I replied. It was the most honest thing I'd said to anyone in weeks. From one day to the next, I had no idea if I would be okay. Out here, it was worse. Out here, I had too much time to think and reflect. Too much time to wallow in my own self-pity and pain. It was the most pathetic thing I'd ever witnessed and yet I could find no way of stopping it.

"....could come back and be Sink's runner for a few days? I know he's taken a liking to you, Adelina. And I'm sure you could use some time off the line." I hadn't heard all that he'd said. At the same time, I heard it as clearly as if I'd said it myself. My head began to shake, my subconscious urging me to say what was in my heart.

"Thanks, Dick. But I want to stay out here. I'll be fine. I'm just hungry and tired. That's all." He glanced down at his lap and I could see the hesitation in the way his shoulders were set and the way he fidgeted restlessly with a button on his jacket. Realizing this was my last chance to convince him, I laid a hand over his. He stopped touching the button at once. Gently, he threaded his fingers through mine and squeezed my hand in the timeless gesture of comfort.

"Adelina, you don't always have to be strong. Even you're allowed to break sometimes." With that, he was gone with a speed that had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. I bit my lip, knowing that he was right. But I knew that I couldn't allow myself to break completely. Not yet. And as the first sounds of the mortars filled my every sense, I realized that it would be a lot harder than I'd let myself believe.

As soon as the call for a medic met my ears, I jumped out of my foxhole and ran off towards the noise. I was being reckless, I knew, but the man was pleading for help. His cries coursed through the air like a flow of blood into my heart. I wept for the sounds he was making. Interspersed through his calls for a medic, I could hear the whimpers for his mother. It was who everyone wished for when they were on the verge of death.

"Mama?! Mama, please help me!" His voice vanished suddenly from the air and my legs urged me forward. Faster, ever faster. Until I finally reached my destination. A replacement, Baker or maybe it was Barns, was hunched over inside his foxhole. I realized, after taking my place beside him and gently pushing him back into a prone position, that his arms were draped along the width of his abdomen. They were acting as a net for his insides. The blood was pooling around the organs, his hands, and his uniform. I knew just from looking at him that he wouldn't make it. Sorrow and pity flooded my heart, knowing that I could nothing to help him except make his passing a little easier. I grabbed a surret, one of my last, from my bag and stuck it into his shoulder. He relaxed after a few minutes and the dripping organs fell from his grasp and hung from him like just another article of clothing. He sat down in the foxhole and reached for my hand. His eyes were unfocused and were glazed over. I could see myself reflected in their glassy exterior and shivered even as I knelt before him.

"Mama, I gotta tell ya something," he began, his words coming out slurred as he tried to talk to me.

"Mama, member that time that I told ya that Johnny was the one who ate your famous blueberry pie for the Christmas party five years ago?" With tears in my eyes,. I nodded my head.

"I remember." The replacement smiled at me fondly and then went on.

"Mama, I lied to you then. It was me who ate it all along. Me and Mister Spencer's boy, Hank. We both ate it and I felt so ashamed for not telling you that for all these years. Can you imagine that Mama? Trying to live my life when all I could ever think about was that I had eaten the pie and then lied about who did it?

"But I think now that I've told you the truth, I can live my life again. That is, if I wasn't dying," he paused for a moment, glancing down at his lap, before looking back up at me, "Aw, Mama, don't cry. Please don't cry." He laid a hand on my cheek and smoothed away the tears that came tumbling down my face. Was that what I had been doing my entire life? Worrying about the past instead of looking ahead to the future? I had already told Ron about my troubled childhood. Could I take it a step further and tell him about Fleischer? I knew that if I didn't, I might end up like the man in my arms. With no other way but down, he'd revealed a secret that he'd kept for five years from his mother and revealed it to a stranger on the verge of death. I didn't want that for myself. I realized with a striking conviction, that the time for secrets was over. In the back of my mind, I was already forming a plan for telling Ron everything. Maybe then, there would be hope for us in the end.

"Thank you so much for telling me that, son," I whispered in his ear. He made a noise, half-way between a laugh and a sob and then he exhaled his last breath. When I leaned away from him, his mouth was formed into a smile and his eyes were crinkling at the corners.

In that moment, I understood how cruel the world could be. It had taken me twenty-three long years to realize that living in the past was not for those people who wanted a future. Living in the past only brought a person misery and self-hatred. And it had taken the passing of a complete stranger to make me see it. My heart, fit to burst with undefined emotions and unanswered questions, seemed to be connected directly with the tear ducts in my eyes. Within a heartbeat, I had sunk helplessly to my knees and covered my shaking hands over my face. The tears rolled silently and swiftly down my cheeks and fell into my lap.

I cried for myself, for my dead family, for the Easy men who had yet to be subjected to this torturous departing, for the replacement beside me, for the mother who had yet to know the fate of her son. Dick, ever the romantic, would write a deeply sentimental letter to her about duty and honor and how her son had died as a hero fighting for his country. I couldn't help but wonder if that was true anymore. What was the point of this living hell that we were being subjected to? What was the point of this bloody war we found ourselves in?

I was shoved back into reality when an ice-cold hand closed around my shoulder. Slowly, the owner of the hand hoisted me to my feet.

"Adelina, come on. You shouldn't see this." I glanced down in disappointment at my hands. They were covered in blood.

"Gene, whose blood is that?"

"Not yours, honey. Let's get you back to your foxhole so we can wash it off, okay?" I felt myself nod as if I was somehow outside of myself. One side of me was disconnected and unfeeling. It was like all of my emotions had been wiped away. But, at the same time, I could focus on nothing but those same emotions. I was now starkly aware of my own mortality. And all I wanted was Ron's arms around me.

So, I did the only thing I could do. I let Eugene lead me to my foxhole so I could clean the blood from my hands. But no matter how many times I washed them, I would never get rid of the replacement from my mind and all that he had done to save me from becoming just like him.

**Finally right? No, this has been written up for a while I promise. I've just been so busy that I've forgotten that you all don't have it. I really hope you enjoy it. Big hat tip to captain ty who has been a big help with the last few chapters for this story. So, thank her lots and lots. Otherwise, I'm not sure where these chapters would be now. I'm on Chapter 27 just so you all know if you don't look at my profile. Which, by the way, if you ever want to know what's going on with LMHH or whatever other story, then just go to my profile. I usually update it at least every other day just to give you a projected day when I should be posting again. **

**But for Chapter 26, it should be about a week from now. I might just give it to you Sunday night. Not sure. Tuesday, I might be busy doing other stuff since it's going to be my big 18! but probably not so, yeah. Anyway, happy reading, and please review if you have the chance. :)**

**And a big thank you to everyone who has been reviewing this story. Iloveboyswhosparkle, captain ty(again another huge thanks), Sairahiniel, Kaida635, pirate-muffins-13, and AivieEnchanted. They all reviewed for Chapter 24, so thank you so much! **


	26. Chapter 26

Adelina's POV

I could feel the warmth from Gene's hand burning through my uniform. It was comforting and protective. I glanced over my shoulder to see him smiling at me. Although, from my angle, it looked more like a smirk. A facial expression that reminded me all too well of Ron. I closed my eyes and glanced away, feeling unable to cope with the feelings Ron was still able to stir within me. It had been an entire month since he'd all but convinced me that he didn't want me around anymore. And it was still tearing me apart inside. I could feel it, like a sharpened blade, cutting through every fiber of my being until I was sure that there couldn't be much more to shave away.

I was realizing now that it would take much more than just a firm resolution to get over Ron. However, even as I knew this, I also knew that I couldn't do it. I doubted that I would ever stop loving him or wanting him. I doubted too that any other man would ever suffice. Things just seemed to fall into place whenever I was with Ron. Nothing could change that. I'd rather die than to stop feeling that way about him. And as my fingers grazed the cold barrel of the pistol, I couldn't help but think that it might just come to that.

Beside me, Eugene came to a halt as Spina came running over to us.

"Gene, they're about to go out on the patrol. If you're busy, I'll go, but I figured you still wanted to." Gene glanced at me, scrutinizing every twitch of my lips and the way my eyebrows were furrowed.

"No, I'll go, Spina. Just take care of her, alright?" he asked and made to pass me off like a doll to Spina. My anger flared and I wrenched my hand from his grasp.

"I don't think so. I'm not some common object that can be passed from man to man dammit! Did you two ever think to ask me if I wanted to go on the patrol?" I paused a moment, not to allow them to answer, but to catch my breath. I was finding it difficult to breathe in my sudden rage.

"Of course you didn't. Because men never think about what women might be thinking and feeling. They don't care. And I'm so sick of it!" I was nearly shouting now and I'd drawn the attention of several others. When I considered who I was really talking to, my passionate anger disappeared into thin air. My shoulders slumped and my knees buckled beneath me.

When the tears began to stream down my cheeks, I wrapped my arms around my chest, trying to keep myself in one piece. I could do nothing but release all the pent up frustration and sorrow into the air. Gene immediately knelt before me and took me into his embrace. My fingers wrapped around the front of his ODs, holding on for dear life. I buried my face in his chest and let the sobs shake my body from head to foot.

"How do I make it stop?" I gasped, finally able to form a complete sentence. Gene smoothed the hair away from my face and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Time, honey," he told me and kissed my cheek, "Now, I want you to go back to your hole and get some sleep. You're exhausted Adelina. And you're going to lose it soon if you don't take it easier on yourself." Somehow, I managed to find reason and nodded. I wiped my eyes and then gave him a small smile. I knew now that there was only reasonable answer for my never-ending problem. It wouldn't be easy for anyone, but I felt somehow that it was the right thing to do.

"I'm sorry, Gene. For everything," I muttered and then started off toward my foxhole. In the back of my mind, I already knew that wasn't where I was headed. I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't deal with the crying, the heart ache, the sorrow, the pain that I constantly felt while I was away from Ron. I was unraveling. Slowly but surely. I knew it for a fact because I couldn't even muster up a sensible amount of fear for what I was about to do. I couldn't feel regret or anything else for that matter. I was like an broken record, replaying the same song over and over again until finally, it becomes like just another sound. A sound that you can hear but you don't pay attention to after a while.

My emotions were the broken records. I'd replayed them in my mind, in my actions for too long. Now they just felt like another part of life. And I could silence them forever with just one twitch of the finger. One bullet. That would be all that it would take. My lips turned upwards at the thought that I wouldn't feel anything anymore. What I couldn't' understand was that I wouldn't need emotions where I was going.

I made my way into an empty clearing on the edge of Easy's sector of the line. It was quiet here, peaceful almost. The perfect place to end one life and begin another. I looked around, not caring much about what I was about to do, only who might see it. Deciding that it was now or never, my fingers slid slowly down the front of my jacket into the pocket that had been the home of my pistol since I'd gotten it in Carentan. The handle was cold to the touch. Smooth and cold, the way I'd finally become. I took it out of my pocket and stared at it. Its black color was a dark contrast to the pale white snow on the ground.

I'd always thought that black, white, and red went well together. I'd never quite considered it in terms of my own dark red blood pooling around my head as the last sounds of the earth faded from my ears and the sight of the surrounding trees faded from my sight. I wondered if there would be any pain. Then, I remembered that I wouldn't feel it anyway. As if that was the ultimate answer to everything, my hand closed resolutely around the handle of the gun. And I lifted it to my temple.

_Don't do it. _Tears filled my eyes as I heard that voice. The voice that was simultaneously my worst torment and my biggest weakness.

"Leave me alone. I have to do this," I whispered into the bitter cold wind. It carried my words away as quickly as they rolled off my tongue and I was instantly gratified that the world would have an idea of why I was doing this.

_Adelina, please. You don't have to do this. I can...I can be better. I don't want to lose you. Not now. _I closed my eyes, trying to block out the sounds. But, even now, I could feel their ghostly fingers closing around the gun, closing around my throat. Constricting and constricting until there was nothing left but the desperate need to get away.

"I didn't want to lose you. But, it's too late. Please let me do it. I can't stand feeling like this anymore. I can't wait for you anymore. It hurts too much," I said and felt that I was losing consciousness. I didn't know if it was because of the intensity of my feelings or the fleeting kisses that were whispering against my lips.

_I love you. Stay with me. _After that, all I knew was darkness and blissful peace.

I wanted to listen, but the warmth and comfort of the unknown was calling my name. I closed my eyes, my fingers barely grazing against his cheek.

"Don't worry," I muttered before slipping into a world of inky bliss.

Speirs' POV

I gazed off into space, willing the image of the woman swimming before my vision to disappear. Her soft auburn hair spiraled downwards, finally falling to her pale shoulders. Her green eyes were full of fire as she gazed at me through a curtain of mist. I could feel the pale fingers grasped blindly for my hand. When she found it, she stepped forward and smiled. My eyes were drawn instantly to her plump pink lips, begging for my attention. I clenched my fists tighter to my side as I felt a growing hardness pressing against my thigh. A deep growl rolled up my throat and dispersed into the air. I saw the owners of the foxhole I was passing shudder and then shoot each other worried glances.

"Lieutenant Speirs?" one of them called after me. I turned around, not entirely surprised. I couldn't imagine what he saw on my face, but it silenced him. His dull brown eyes widened and then averted their gaze to the ground.

"Never mind, sir." With a slight smirk, I turned around again and headed off toward the strip of forest between Dog Company and Easy Company. Whenever I couldn't stop thinking about Adelina, I went out there and just thought.

A thousand things raised themselves like ghosts to the forefront of my mind. Sometimes, I thought about Maria and the child she was carrying in her stomach. She was already four months along. I wondered briefly if I would be there for the birth. Then, I realized that I didn't want to be. I wasn't ready yet to be a father. I also wasn't ready to face the fact that it would make leaving Maria just that much more difficult. Out of all these things, I didn't know exactly where I stood. With Maria, things had always been unsteady. It was like I was treading water the entire time I was around her. One wrong move and I'd be left drowning in her wake. Suffocating until there was nothing left in me to fight for.

But I did know one thing for sure. No matter what happened, I wouldn't be able to live without Adelina. Somehow, she'd managed to find a way under the steely exterior and had embedded herself inside of my very soul. I could feel her in every inch of my skin. She was a flame that I couldn't extinguish. And I knew without a doubt that I couldn't go back to my wife and leave her behind.

I just didn't know the words to tell her. I had no illusions of being a poet. I couldn't even write a military report properly. So, how could I convey to her that she meant the world to me and more? How could I tell her that she was everything I lived for, everything I breathed for? How could I tell her that when I wasn't near her, I felt like I was missing a part of myself? How could I tell her all these things and not sound as if I was just saying them to get into her pants? I didn't know how, and that scared me. Almost as much as being able to feel those things in the first place.

I realized that even after all that she'd shown me of how she felt for me, I was still insecure. I hated the feeling. I felt as if everything between us could crumble and fade into the wind in a matter of seconds and I would be helpless to stop it. I'd had other women in my life, but none so mind-numbingly complicated. It excited me and aroused within me a passion that I could hardly contain at times. The urge to pull her into my arms and run away with her was so strong even now that I could feel my fingers weaving through the air, seeking her out. They snapped back to their sides when I suddenly heard a sound.

It was so small I wondered at the fact that I'd heard anything. When I heard it again, I knew I wasn't imagining things. I also knew who the person who was making the noise. I knew them like I knew the back of my own hand. The innocent whimpers filled my ears and clamped down on my heart as tightly as it could go. In a sudden frenzy, I jogged forward, calling her name.

"Adelina?! Where are you, baby?" I received no answer and it only made me move faster. Why she was out here alone, I had no idea, but I had to find her.

"Adelina, please answer me." I heard it again and I turned around, my eyes met with a sight that could have made me fall to my knees. In a sudden act of desperation, my legs took a few wobbly steps before I finally did sink to the ground. Her long fingers were gripped around the handle of the pistol, the end of the barrel pushed firmly against her temple. I was trembling inside like a small child, my worst fear being realized right before my eyes.

"Don't do it," I said, the words coming out as a feeble whisper. I watched her eyes fill with salty droplets and it was all I could do not to reach out and brush them from her face. What worried me even more than the tears was how her eyes seemed to stretch into nothingness. She was looking at me, but she might as well have been an entire world away. She couldn't see me and I knew that she didn't really believe that I was with her.

"Leave me alone. I have to do this," she muttered. Her trembling lips and shaking hands were the only thing to give her away. Maybe there was still hope for me to save her. But I was floundering as to how I would accomplish that without her pulling the trigger. Just the thought had tears forming at the corners of my eyes. I brushed them away hastily, willing my emotions not to get the better of me. I heaved a shuddering sigh, knowing that it wasn't working in the least. Instinctively, I shuffled forward a few inches on my knees, careful not to do anything that would frighten her. I was finding it hard to breathe, my heart pumping blood out faster than normal. My veins were filling with adrenaline so that I would be able to react to anything she did within a split second.

"Adelina," I said, my throat constricting tightly on itself as I tried to find the right words to say.

"Please. You don't have to do this. I can...I can be better. I can't lose you. Not now," I gasped, feeling in my heart and soul that this was all I wanted to say to her. I could be better for her. She'd sacrificed so much already for me and I didn't want to lose her. Not now, not ever. With a conviction that left me reeling, I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. And if that meant that I would have to spend a lifetime making up for what an ass I'd been, then I would do it.

"I didn't want to lose you. But, it's too late. Please let me do it. I can't stand feeling like this anymore. I can't wait for you anymore. It hurts too much," she muttered, but I could tell she didn't mean it. Her hand suddenly fell to her side. Her body began to slip to the ground, and for a moment, I wondered if she'd really done it. Then, I realized that I hadn't heard the shot. And both sides of her face were still as smooth as ever. I lurched forward, grabbing her in my arms and hugging her to my chest. Her delicate frame fit so perfectly into my arms, her cheek falling against my neck. I tipped her head back and kissed her lips, relishing in their softness and willing desperation against mine. It thrilled me to know that she was still alive and I gripped her tightly in my arms, hoping that this wasn't a dream. Willing this to be the reality that I'd been unconsciously waiting for for the last six months.

"I love you. Stay with me," I whispered in her ear. She pressed nearer to me, her finger tips just trailing along my cheek before dropping back into her lap.

"Don't worry," she whispered. I knew then that she was asleep. And I stood up with her in my arms, knowing that if anyone would know what to do with her, it would be Dick Winters.

***

I slipped quietly through the trees, relying on my eyes and my knowledge of the area to get me to the Battalion CP. A torrent of snow was drifting lazily to the ground. The stark contrast of white all around me was disorienting and I feared that I would never find it.

I kept my thoughts focused solely on finding Winters. If I allowed myself to become distracted even in the least by what had just happened, I knew that I wouldn't be able to stop thinking about it.

"Speirs?" I turned slightly, catching sight of Dick standing about ten feet away. The razor that he'd been holding in his hand tumbled quietly to the ground. His lips parted several times, but he seemed to be at a loss for words. But, if his eyes were any hint, I could see exactly what he wanted to tell to me. His icy blue eyes transformed to being filled with confusion, then concern, and finally fury.

"Captain Winters, I'm sure there a million things you'd like to say to me right now. But I think our main priority should be getting a jeep out here to pick Ade-Miss Jones up." That seemed to awaken something inside of him and he rushed back to his foxhole, his movements fluid and timed. As if he'd done this sort of thing many times before. I watched his mouth form the words, but I couldn't hear them. I could feel myself drifting out of focus as I struggled to maintain what little attention I had on my superior officer. I was mainly concerned with the gentle whimpers that were falling from the lips of the angel in my arms. I looked down at her, fully realizing for the first time just how much I loved her. I couldn't describe it, but I could feel it. In the constricting of my throat when my fingers grazed against her cheek, whisking a loose hair from her face. The acceleration of my heart every time I caught the slight upturn of her mouth.

"Speirs!" Dick shouted, his voice ringing like a bullet through my ears, "They'll be here in ten minutes." He left it at that, but I could hear the unsaid thing in his mind. _After they leave with her, you've got some explaining to do. _

I gulped audibly and shifted my weight from my right foot to my left foot. The ten minutes seemed to drag on forever. Unconsciously, as the sound of the approaching jeep filled my ears, I pulled her closer to my chest. I didn't want for her to leave now. Whatever it was that I had done to...force her hand, I had to fix it. I'd told her that I would change and I would. My heart was racing, as if its exuberance was enough to keep her with me forever.

I wanted her to wake up and tell me that she didn't want to leave me either. However, it never came. Even when I put her on the stretcher on the front of the truck, she didn't stir. Hesitantly, I kissed her forehead, my fingers running lovingly along her jaw. I knew I was making it harder on myself, but I couldn't help it. The need to touch her, to _feel _her was overwhelming and I knew that it was because our future together hung in the balance. Somehow, it felt as if letting her go to Bastogne would be the end of everything.

"I love you, baby," I said and stepped away from the jeep even as the driver gave a sigh of exasperation. I glared at his retreating back, anger temporarily filling the void of missing her for a moment. I watched them go, the fury draining from my heart as quickly as it had come, leaving a wave of fear and unutterable sorrow in its wake. I turned around, unable to watch the scene before me any longer. I regretted it immediately after seeing the look on Dick's face.

"Captain Winters, I can explain," I said, though I wasn't sure that it was the truth. I sighed, running my hand absently against the hairs on my chin, "I...."Anxiety drowned out the rest of my hastily-spun speech before I finally couldn't remember what I was trying to tell him in the first place.

"Why don't you start with what you did to her. I think that will explain why she was passed out in your arms," Winters said abruptly, the blind anger in his voice reverberating in the depths of my soul. I shook my head to clear it before telling him what had happened between us. I explained the incident three days ago when I'd all but ignored her before launching into my tale of today.

"I was out for a walk and I found her with a...with a gun in her hand," I began, almost unable to go on, but I forced myself into pretending not to care. It helped as I continued, "And she put it to her temple. I thought for sure that she was going to pull the trigger, but I managed to talk her out of it. She started to sink to the ground and I caught her in my arms. She passed out, not by any efforts of mine." Dick considered me a moment. It was a cold, calculating look. The ones that chill you to your bones but that make you determined not to show your own weakness.

"Do you love her?" he asked me. I looked at him in shock, not sure as to where he was taking this. But without hesitation, I nodded, knowing that being honest was the first step toward the change I had to make.

"It doesn't seem to me like you do," Dick said, serious not even beginning to describe the look on his face. My lips opened, only a deep growl sounding in my chest.

"You have no idea the number of times she's ran to me, tears in her eyes because of something you did to her. And every time she took you back." He let it sink in for a moment, my blood curdling at the idea of her weeping because of my actions. The pain I felt only increased until I thought I knew a little of what she'd been suffering through for the last six months. "She's been living like this and you haven't been any wiser. Do you even care what happens to her? Do you care what you've done to her? Do you care that she's obviously been thinking about doing...this to herself?" His voice had not risen once during his entire speech, but when he faltered on saying aloud that she'd just tried to shoot herself, I could sense something just beneath the surface. There was anger, fear, and maybe even disappointment. But for what? The fact that she'd entertained the idea and felt that her sorrow and pain was enough to justify her actions? Or was it that I'd done nothing to prevent it? Or was the disappointment in himself for letting her fall so deeply while she was supposed to be under his care? I couldn't be sure, and he was talking so quickly that I wasn't able to dwell on the questions forming in my head for very long.

"She's in love with you Ron. Even after everything you've thrown at her. Even after she found out that you were married, she's loved you unconditionally. And from all that I've seen of the way you treat her, it doesn't seem to me like you feel as strongly," he must have sensed my compulsion to speak up for myself at that point because he rushed to say, "And if you do, then you have a hell of a way of showing it." With that, Dick turned around and jumped back into his foxhole. I took that as my dismissal, but I couldn't find the decency in me to turn around and walk away. I stepped forward, my face as determined as I'd ever known it to be.

"Permission to speak, sir?" I asked. It was the sort of question that emphasized that my chance to speak wasn't really up for negotiation. I was going to tell him what was on my mind no matter if he let me. Winters turned around, eying me up and down before agreeing.

"Permission granted, Lieutenant."

"Captain Winters, I'm not sure that I should be saying this or doing this, but I feel like I have to. I love Adelina Jones. More than that, I want her and I need her. I'd have made an honest woman out of her months ago if I wasn't already married. And believe me, marrying my wife was the worst mistake of my life and now she's pregnant. I haven't told Adelina yet, but I plan to, sir. I plan on being everything for her that I can be. If it's not enough...if she decides that I'm not good enough, then I'll spend the rest of my life trying, sir. I can't really tell you how much she means to me, Captain, but I want you to know that I do love her." I saluted him then, not leaving him the option to reply. I turned around and started away from him.

In the back of my mind, I felt lighter than I had in a long time. I couldn't tell if that was the intensity of my feelings or if it was from finally getting the courage up to tell someone exactly how I felt about Adelina.

Of course, another part of me didn't want to believe any of what he'd said. It would mean admitting that I'd royally fucked up with her. It would mean dealing with my own weaknesses before I could begin to piece her back together. It would also mean that I would have to tell her about my pregnant wife. My head was reeling by the time that I got back to Dog's line. I couldn't blame the men for wanting to avoid me. I would have done the same thing. That got me to thinking. All of the times that everyone, even my wife, had refused to talk to me because their natural instinct told them that I shouldn't be messed with...Adelina had never been afraid to approach me, no matter how brooding or angry I seemed. I thought back on the scene in Mourmelon with a smirk on my face, relishing in reliving the way my every nerve was set alight by the way she stood up to me. It was yet another facet to her character that I was beginning to catalog for future use. I dropped into my foxhole, closing my eyes for the briefest moment and finding solace in the gentle curve of her face and the calming green of her innocent eyes.

Adelina's POV

The first thing I noticed when I awoke was that I wasn't cold and my socks weren't wet. I looked around, disoriented after seeing the seemingly hundreds of bodies shoved into the small building where I found myself. I felt like I was in a can of tuna. I shuddered at the sound of the soft moans and the screams of pain resounding around the room. I shut my eyes and clapped my hands over my ears as I was reminded of my time as a nurse at the base hospital in London. I suddenly remembered just why I'd been so eager to take up Captain Fields' offer to be a spy. I would have done anything to get out of that place even if it wasn't so glamorous or romantic as digging up dirt on the enemy.

The next thing I knew, someone had begun to tap relentlessly on my arm. I uncovered my ears and stared at my unwelcome visitor.

"Excuse moi, mademoiselle. Nous avons besoin de ce lit," the man was saying, an air of impatience surrounding him. I looked to him, not knowing what he meant in the slightest. Then he made a gesture with his arm toward the bed and then at the wounded man who was being hoisted around on a stretcher. I looked between them, trying to figure out what he was saying despite the language barrier. Suddenly, something clicked in my mind, and I jumped to my feet, moving hastily away from the bed.

"I'm so sorry," I began to say, but I knew they wouldn't understand me.

"Adelina?" a voice, as easily recognizable as my own reached my ears. I turned around and nearly jumped into Gene's arms. A feeling of comfort and welcome familiarity swelled in my heart. Tears sprung to the corners of my eyes.

"W-why am I here? What's going on?" He grabbed my hand and led me toward a secluded corner of the building, his face a solemn mask.

"Now, you can't get mad at me, alright?" I shook my head, promising that I wouldn't.

"Please just tell me what's happening, Gene. Why am I off the line?" He glanced at me, a temporary look of disbelief appearing in his eyes.

"Adelina, you were sent back from being exhausted. I tried to tell you that this would happen. Captain Winters says that you need to stay here for a few days before you come back." Anger and fear filled every corner of my body, and made me open my mouth before I'd realized what I was saying.

"I'm not staying here, Gene. This is why I wanted to get out of that damned hospital in London. Gene, please let me come back with you." Even as I said it, I knew that I wanted to go back because I wanted to see if my dream of Ron saving me from myself had been true. I wondered at the fact that he was such a good actor and whether or not he would be honest with me this time. But even as I thought of these things, Eugene was shaking his head.

"Adelina, believe me, I want to bring you back. But the Captain made it clear that you stay here for right now. Besides, things are getting really bad on the line. He doesn't want you to be subjected to that right now while you're so..."

"So what Gene?" I demanded, knowing that I shouldn't be angry with him, but I couldn't find it in me not to be.

"While you're so torn up," he said, sending my body shaking. The immensity of what I'd been about to do only hours ago seemed to well up inside me. The flood waters had broken and I was slowly drowning in them, unable to keep myself afloat.

"Alright, I'll stay," I said, choking pathetically on my own tears. Eugene's arms were around me in a moment and he hugged me to his chest. The tears leaked from my eyes for a minute before I sniffed and wiped them away. I couldn't cry any more. I had no more tears left to pour on the ground, and it terrified me. Just how long had this been going on and what had brought it to a head? What had finally caused me to push that gun to my temple and consider that I might pull the trigger? I shut my eyes briefly and managed to will the thoughts away for now. I turned my attention on more important things. Like the fact that the sun was sinking ever lower on the horizon and Eugene would be needed back on the line soon, especially since it was December 24th.

"I suppose you should get back to the line, Eugene. They'll be needing you. I'm sure the Germans won't be satisfied with simply sitting around on Christmas Eve," I said, my voice dull to my own ears. A far-away look widened his brown eyes.

"It is Christmas Eve. And the Captain thinks you've cracked," he teased. I chuckled lightly at the joke, appreciating his attempt to make me laugh enormously. I leaned forward and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you, Gene. I'll see you soon I'm sure. And tell all the boys I wish them a Happy Christmas," I told him with a small smile as I pulled a pack of cigarettes out of my pocket. He took them with a nod and squeezed my outstretched hand.

"I can do that. Merry Christmas to you too, Adie." I watched him walk away with a growing heaviness settling in my heart and my lungs. I could hardly breathe for want of all of this, all of my problems, to simply vanish. I knew the world didn't work that way, but I wished it did. For once, I just wanted something simple and uncomplicated to happen in my life. Then again, if I'd wanted to live a simple life, then I could have done something less exotic than volunteering myself into the middle of World War Two. And if I hadn't, I wouldn't have met Easy Company. Most importantly, I would never have met Ronald Speirs. My heart lurched heavily as the name crept into every pore of my being, filling me with a mixture of both relief and anxiety. Something in me seemed to settle while the rest of me was at once aroused and searching the air, the earth for him. I needed, wanted him near me in that moment and the impulse to run back to the front was so strong that I felt my legs moving me towards the door. I didn't try to stop because it was almost as if getting back to Easy and back to Ron was the smartest thing that I could have ever done. I rushed past the screaming wounded and the tired glances of the nurses and doctors. Somehow, I couldn't find it inside me to stay and help where I was so desperately needed.

When I reached the doors and stepped outside into the night air, I gulped in a breath of fresh air. The snow in the wind blowing in my face burned my lungs and filled me with a sense of life that I'd never experienced before now. I took a few steps forward, reveling in the feelings of freedom and joy that were fleeting caresses against every inch of my skin.

The sensation was short-lived. One moment, the world had been set on its axis. The next, it was a place filled with chaos and anarchy, defined by thunderous explosions and fire. I heard the whistling of a bomb as it flew over my head and crashed into the church that I'd just come out of. The explosion sent me reeling backwards into the newly-fallen snow that covered the ground. I gasped, my expression torn between horror and bewilderment. I didn't have time to notice the countless explosions and screams that swept through the streets of the city. I could only sit and stare at that building until it became like a crumb of dust that swept across my skin and settled in my hair. I could hear the sound of a weeping woman in my ears and I rushed forward on instinct, my drive to help whoever it was so deeply ingrained in me that I was helpless to its call.

That's when I was caught suddenly by the waist and pulled flush against someone's chest. My eyes roved slowly up their body to meet their steady gaze. It was Ron, but it wasn't the same man I'd known before. There was something in his own chocolate brown eyes that had me wishing that he really did love me. I realized in that moment what I'd been trying to deny to myself since I'd woken up in the now-demolished church: that he'd saved me from killing myself because he felt he had to save me. It was through no other compelling reason that he'd taken the gun from my hand. The words he'd said had been just that-words.

He looked on me with love in his eyes, but I wouldn't believe it. I'd gotten to a point where I couldn't take it any more. I wouldn't play his childish games any longer. I'd made excuses for him and for myself, foolishly believing that I could get through whatever he threw at me as long as I loved him. So, making up my mind right there and then, I pushed my body gently away from his. I struggled with all my might to turn around and walk away from him. I did it, hesitation making my fingers linger for a second too long on his forearm. As much as I would try and keep away, that second would make all the difference.

**Okay, I had a lot more that I would have liked to have said in this AN, but I decided that just the thanks would be okay for now. Lol**

**So, thank you to Owl City for making the song Vanilla Twilight. I think its perfect for what's going on in this chapter, and I listened to it about a thousand times because it was really helping me to write. I'd also like to extend a HUGE thank you to captain ty. I can't tell you enough how much you've helped me for the past few chapters. :) But of course, I tell you that you're amazing every chance I can get. :) **

**Also big thanks to the following people who reviewed since I last posted: captain ty, AivieEnchanted, sezq, Sairahiniel, pirate-muffins-13, and PaperHeart382. **

**And my suggestions are to thank them for doing their best to provide me with feedback, go read their stories. Please, please, please! They're all really good and I feel honored that they take the time to review my story. So, yeah, go do it!**


	27. Chapter 27

Speirs' POV

I crushed her against me, not caring about the consequences. I'd only known that the need to have her near, to have her safe against me was so strong that I'd had no choice but to do it. I could feel her soft and supple curves pressing against me. I was momentarily stricken by the desire to pull her into a vacated building and have my way with her. But it wasn't safe. The whole reason in my coming to Bastogne was so that I could get her back to the line with me. There were men out there who I knew would be willing to put their lives on the line to save her. Here, no one would care whether she lived or died. She was just another nameless face. I looked into her eyes and I couldn't imagine that anyone could ever see her as anything other than the wonderful woman I knew her to be. She was amazing in every sense of the word and I loved her so much that it left me breathless as her hands found their way to my chest. I foolishly believed that things would be alright between the two of us. The sweep of her warm breath across my lips seemed like more of an invitation than anything else and I leaned ever closer to her. Then, her fingers closed around the front of my uniform before something sparked to life in her eyes. She seemed to remember herself and began to push me away, not pull me closer. I gazed at her, unable to fully process what was happening. The gentle determination in her eyes was enough to tell me that whatever I'd been hoping to save had all but disappeared from our view. The feeling of hopelessness kept my boots glued to the ground as I watched her walk away from me. My soul reached out for one last desperate time to grab her, pull her close, and never let go.

"Adelina..." I gasped, my chest collapsing against itself and causing my entire body to shut down. She didn't turn around as I wanted her to. She didn't make any indication that she'd even heard my gentle plea except for the slight faltering of her legs in her procession away from me. Without restraint of how much my life was in danger, I sunk to the ground on my knees. Silently, I willed an explosion to hit my body and send me into a million flecks of dust that would float away in the wind.

It hit me then just how much life had meant while there was a chance that I could still keep her in my life. I knew that if I couldn't have her, there was only one option left to me.

***

Adelina's POV

I looked down at my hands. It was funny how I noticed certain things now that I'd made the decision to stay away from Ron. Like how perfectly his fingers had filled the gaps between mine. And how much I'd always loved the possessive way in which he would hold me sometimes. It wasn't suffocating, but it made me feel...wanted, loved for a moment. I'd never had that before and even as I knew that we could never be, I wondered about it. Hell, I dreamed about it all the time. I knew in my heart that it hadn't all been false pretense with Ron. But somewhere along the way, he'd realized what I'd been trying to forget all along. That his status as a married man, no matter what the circumstances of their relationship were, was still enough to keep us apart. It hit me then that it had already been two weeks since I'd last seen him in Bastogne.. Two entire weeks of sleepless nights in which I still found the time to dream. I shut my eyes, trying to think of anything but him. It felt like two sharpened claws were ripping my insides as they struggled from the caverns of my heart. I bit back my silent tears as I thought about something equally as bad as Ron.

Easy Company had been hit hard and good by the hand of death in the past two weeks. I closed my eyes as tears emerged to the surface and I felt like I might drown in them once again. Muck and Penkala. I tried to push the memory of their faces to the back of my mind, but I couldn't. I realized then just how tight my grip had been on my thigh. Even through my two layers of clothing, I could feel the tips of my nails digging into my icy flesh. Guarnere and Toye had been taken from us too. I remembered running towards Buck, the call for a medic still settling like a thick sheet over all of us in the snow-filled air.

_My legs were pounding beneath me, almost as if they had taken on a life of their own. My heart soared at the sudden burst of energy that exploded through my veins. I couldn't make myself focus on the faint sounds of the mortars still falling on the line all around me. The only thing I could think of was getting as fast as I could to Buck and whoever needed my help. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw when I emerged into that blood-seeped clearing. I gasped slightly but rushed forward all the same, the need to do something over riding my repulsion and sorrow. _

"_Bill...Joe? You're alive?" I managed to choke out. I could see the shallow fall and rise of their chests, but I wouldn't believe it until they said so. _

"_We're fine, sweetheart, just get us bandaged up, alright," Bill said, his voice much more steady than mine. I glanced up at him and found that I could easily meet his eyes. I could see things warring in his eyes that I'd never thought were even in his vocabulary. Confusion, sadness, but mostly fear. It was shining from every pore of his body and in the way his mouth was set. I nodded and moved forward to tend to him. He shook his head and pointed without hesitation at Toye. _

"_Take care of him first, Adie. Poor guy's been hit more times than me anyway." For a moment, I could see that old Guarnere charm in his face when he winked at me playfully. I did as he said, but I laid a hand on his arm. It was supposed to be reassuring, and from the small smile playing on his lips, it had been. _

"_You said you'd get back to the states before me," Joe said as I began to wrap the remaining half of his leg in bandages that were already starting to stain through with his scarlet blood. _

"_I never lie either, Joe," Guarnere said. At that moment, Roe appeared at my side and gently brushed my hands away. _

"_I was doing just fine by myself, Gene," I muttered, slightly put out that I now had nothing to do with my hands. Joe, ever intuitive, seemed to sense this and wrapped one of my hands with his. I glanced at him, not sure what to make of this new display of brotherly affection. Joe Toye was one of those rare men in life who doesn't say much, but when he did, you knew that it meant something. And I'd never really been sure about how he felt about me being with the Company, but now I knew. _

"_You'll write to me, won't you? Both of you?" I looked at them imploringly, afraid that if I didn't, they might vanish. They both nodded. _

"_'Course we will. Every day," Bill said sarcastically. _

"_I'm serious, Bill. Even when you get back to the states. Even when you've gotten settled down with a family, promise you'll still write to me." The desperation in my eyes seemed to curb their smiles into frowns. _

"_You have to make a promise to me then, Adie. If you do, I'd agree to anything." I took his hand too. _

"_Anything, Bill."_

"_Don't let Lieutenant Speirs get away. I know he doesn't act like it sometimes, but the guys loves you. Anyone who has enough gall to drive all the way out to Bastogne just to save your ass from standing in the middle of the street has to be in love with you. If it were me, I'd just wait here and hope for the best." A look of false hurt crossed my face and I smacked his arm playfully. Then, I felt my lips turn down at the corners again. _

"_I can't promise you that, Bill."_

"_Then no letters," he said crossly. I sighed in exasperation, looking to Gene and Joe for help. They both refused to meet my eyes. _

"_It's not as easy as it sounds," I muttered under my breath, but gave them a small smile, "Fine, I'll try. For you, Bill." He squeezed my hand. It was solid and the most reassuring thing I'd felt since that night when I'd laid in Ron's arms with nothing between us but our own skin. Brief moments of that memory floated to the surface, but I barely had time to enjoy them because two men were coming forward to take Bill and Joe away from me. They took Bill first, my heart and hand clinging to him until the very last moment. He was gone so fast, I didn't even have time to say a proper goodbye to him. Soon after, Joe was taken too. In an unexpected gesture of tenderness, he kissed me on the cheek and told me that he would make Bill write to me if he had to. I smiled at him through the thick curtain of tears coating my eyelashes. _

"_Thanks Joe. Please, take care of yourself." He winked at me, and then he was gone. _

"Adelina!" I jumped at the voice that seemed to bellow in my ear. My heart pounded in my ears and adrenaline rushed through my veins, leaving me slightly woozy. Cool fingers on my hand calmed me down and I was able to focus enough to notice that Dick was watching me intently.

"Are you alright?" he asked. His voice was quiet and held all the tranquility I would have expected from him. Only the tight grip on my fingers showed me what he was really feeling. I knew that he was still worried about whether or not I should be back on the line. But, since Bastogne had been turned upside down, all the soldiers who'd been there as a reprieve from the stresses of the front were forced to return to their companies. The only thing he could do was to send me off the line back to England, and I wouldn't stand for that, no matter how messed up he thought I was.

I nodded slowly, still slightly unsure of myself from being wrenched from the past so suddenly. My heart skipped a beat as I squeezed his hand.

"I'm alright, Dick," I said. He nodded before I'd even finished, almost as if he'd known what I would say even before I did.

"You always say you're alright. And then I have Ron coming to me and telling me that you've had a damn pistol pointed at your head!" he said, his voice echoing long and hard in the depths of my soul. I shuddered. I stared into his icy blue eyes, unable to look away. In those swirling orbs, I could see a flicker of that love he must have still felt for me. It terrified me, but also seemed to alight something within me that must have been lying dormant and patient. On instinct, I reached forward and cupped his cheek. Fire seemed to come to life where our skin met. I felt the backs of my eyes begin to burn. I'd tried to imagine what this conversation would be like, but I never thought that it would hurt so much.

"I'm sorry, Dick. I'm not sure what I was thinking. I-I just...." I trailed off, leaving so many explanations in the air. When he leaned forward and kissed my forehead, I was sure he understood. He lingered there for a moment longer than necessary and my free hand curled around the front of his uniform, holding him to me. My eyes closed and I imagined what this-what we-could be like. It would be easy to fall in love with Dick. That belief had never died, not even when I'd fully realized just how far gone I was when it came to Ron. But, it would never be enough. No one would ever be enough. The thought alone had me pulling away from Dick, muttering a guilty apology.

"I'm sorry, Dick," I said, my fingers trailing along the front of his uniform before finally falling into my lap. I looked up into his face to see that his eyes were slightly unfocused. His chest was heaving from the exertion of something I would never know.

"Dick? Richard?" At the sound of his full first name, Dick seemed to awaken and cleared his throat several times before he could speak again.

"Tell me why you did it," he said. His voice was thick with emotions, his hands gripping my arms so tightly they were growing numb. Struck by how adamant he seemed to get an answer from me, I opened my mouth without a second's thought.

"Dick, I-I don't really know why. It's not a very good reason, but I suppose it all had to do with what I've been trying to deal with for the past month. And it all just seemed to catch up with me and I could only see one way out. I wasn't thinking clearly at all. I'm not sure I'm level-headed even now," I told him, my shoulders sagging under the pressure I could feel bearing down on me. Dick was barely listening, though. He turned his head toward the place where he most needed to be in this moment, but he stayed by my side.

"Are you going to come out there?" he waved toward the place where the assault on Foy was going to begin.

I shook my head. I'd given this a good bit of thought since the moment Lipton had told me it would be happening. Dog Company would be in reserve, and I wasn't ready to spend an afternoon shooting Ron desperate glances from afar just yet. No matter how determined I'd been at the time, I was regretting my decision to stay away from him now. It didn't surprise me. When it came to Ron, nothing I decided was ever concrete except for deciding that I really was in love with him. That had and never would change. But, I thought somehow that staying away from him was the right thing to do. So, I was sticking to it, for now anyway.

"No, Dick, I-I can't," I said, and I hoped he would understand. He bent to kiss my forehead again, and I knew that he did.

"I'm so sorry, Adelina, for everything. You deserve so much better than what you've been dealt." His voice was so soft that it was a murmur against my skin. He began to stand up, but my hand shot out on its own to grasp his hand.

"Dick, don't be sorry for me. Some of what's happened to me has been my fault. And some of it has been completely beyond my control, but I'll never regret falling in love with Ron Speirs and I don't want you to be either." He considered me a moment, his piercing blue eyes probing me from within my very soul. He was searching for something, some answer in my expression that would reveal the truth. And as his smile lit up his face, I knew he'd found it.

"I'll tell the men that you said good luck," he said, squeezing my hand and then letting it fall back to my lap. I smiled at him, not able to do anything else. My heart seemed to drop in my stomach and I found myself scrambling out of my foxhole after him before I even knew what I was doing.

"Dick!" I said, my voice rising nearly to a shout. He turned around, his eyebrows shooting upwards. I gave him a sheepish smile before letting the heat flood my cheeks, "If anything should happen-anything bad, you'll send for me, won't you?" Dick opened his mouth to reply, only to be cut short by the snap of a twig behind us. I turned around so quickly, I was sure that I should have been broken my neck. When I noticed the person walking toward where everyone else was assembled, my heart stuttered to a stop in my chest. It took several startled gasps for air to get it working again.

The utter look of emptiness in Ron's eyes had me nearly bent at the knees. It was like he didn't even know that we were there. He was like a ghost passing through some distant memory that he'd rather forget than continue to relive over and over again.

"Ron?" I whispered in my thoughts, willing him to look at me. To show him that no matter what my actions, I would always love him. But, he didn't and I found myself dying inside because I knew that it was all my fault.

Speirs' POV

One thought from the next, my mind drifted in and out of reality. I found myself alternately staring behind me towards Easy's line and the monotonous expanse of scenery between myself and Foy. I elected for the scenic image. It was easier on my eyes, and I found that not being able to see Easy made not thinking of her that much simpler.

The forest around me was a stark contrast of glistening white snow and shattered black tree trunks. The tree bursts scattered through Easy's position had my blood curdling. My thoughts jumped immediately toward Adelina. My heart squeezed itself at the thought of how scared she must have been while the explosions rained upon the line.

Then, I remembered myself, and the images of her innocent face twisted into a mask of fear were gone from my mind. I had to stop thinking of her. Otherwise, the drive to do something drastic would eat me alive until I finally did what I'd wanted to do since saving her in Bastogne. I wanted to take my own life or have it pulled from me by the enemy. Any ending would have been better than enduring this unutterable pain.

She was no longer in my grasp. My fingers were clutching at thin air where, once, she'd been more than visible. And I was the one to blame. Because of my unwillingness to tell her how I really felt sooner, she'd broken. A fallen angel who was tired of trying to keep up with the complications of our strange relationship. I shut my eyes, slightly overwhelmed by what I was finally having to face. I was the reason that she was so eager to put her life to an end. I was the reason behind it and nothing I could ever do or would ever do would be able to make my previous actions alright.

I wasn't worthy of Adelina. I never had been. And she thought that same thing about herself. I laughed bitterly inside at the cruelty of it all, knowing that the only unworthy one was me. I had never done anything to deserve her love. But, still for my own selfish reasons, I was suffocating her under the weight of having to care for someone who was, by all rights, forbidden. No matter the circumstances of my marriage with Maria, she was still my wife. I had an obligation to fill to her before my own needs, and I hated her for it. More than that, I hated myself for it, for trapping myself so blindly. My promise to John had seemed so inconsequential at the time. I'd made it on the pretense that it would never happen. But it had, and now I was stuck. I was married to Maria while all I really wanted was to be with Adelina. I closed my eyes to imagine her again in my house with my child nestled in the crook of her arm. I pictured what our life could be like, knowing that it would never happen. The knowledge had my heart falling nearly to my knees, dragging the rest of my body with it. It had me turning my head almost against my will in search of that angelic face. Seeing her would both make my realization all the more painful, but it would prolong it if I could just lose myself in her gaze for a moment. However, I noticed now, for the first time, that she was nowhere in sight. It was as if my heart had been ripped out, stabbed through the middle, and then fixed back into place inside my chest.

However, before I'd really had the opportunity to wallow in my own blood, Fate decided to step in once again. The chance I'd been waiting for had finally arrived. It came in the form of Dick Winters shouting my name.

"Speirs! Get your ass over here, now," he shouted, the fury in his voice evident even at this distance. My legs moved beneath me even before I'd made the decision to do so. The look in Winters' eyes was something crazed and terrifying. In that instant, I didn't care how much he'd done to wound my pride. In that moment, I knew immediately why all his men had been sad to see him moving up the ladder to Regiment. At the root of his fury was the care and love he held for Easy. He was watching them get blown to pieces because of Lieutenant Dike's negligent leadership.

"Speirs, you get down there and you take that attack on in!" he shouted, ignoring Colonel Sink, who was still reprimanding him for starting down the hill. I hesitated a moment, bringing Dick's eyes back to two points of gleaming ferocity.

I glanced back down at Foy and could see the mortars blazing through the sky and threatening to hit the men of Easy at any moment. My mind flitted for a second back to Adelina's face. I remembered the softness in her lips that was like no other feeling in the world and the way her fingers would curl around the front of my uniform to pull me closer. I could also remember the cold barrel of the pistol as I took it from her limp fingers into my own and the firm set of her shoulders as she pushed me away for the final time.

I couldn't take back the things I'd done and said to her, but I could make it so that I was never to bother her again. Because as long as I was alive and there was still hope within me that I could still be with her, then I would never be able to give in to defeat. So, I turned back to Winters and said the only thing that I could to prepare at least one person for my sacrifice.

"Don't count on me making it through that," I said quietly before taking off down the hill. Yelling and sobbing mingled in my ears and bled into nothingness as my legs carried my farther and farther away from 2nd Battalion. The whistles of the wind soon blocked out every other noise and I was able to drift down the hill on a wave of silence that was both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because it had been so long since I'd caught even a moment of silence. A curse because it gave me the time to think and focus on things that I'd rather keep from my mind before I was blown to pieces.

Adelina was the only image before my eyes. What would she do when she found out that I had died? Would she cry over me? Would she be relieved because the drama in her life had ended? I had no idea and the fact terrified me more than anything else in the world. In some perverted way, I wanted her to feel pain and sorrow over my death. But I had to remember that the whole point of this was that she could move on with her life without having to worry about leaving me behind.

All these thoughts stirred within me a profound helplessness. I was so lost in my despair that the mortar shell did nothing to shock me out of the inner workings of my mind. Not until I'd jumped through the thick smoke did I realize what had happened. My pulse raced and I cursed my luck under my breath. Of course the one time I wanted to be hurt, I wouldn't be. Didn't God understand that I wanted death to come for me? I wouldn't live the rest of my life without Adelina. No matter the cold facade and complete indifference I was able to put up with everyone else, it was so much more different with her. For some reason, she was able to bring out my deeply hidden emotions with only the bat of an eyelash or the curve of her lip. It was maddening. However, my thirst for those unexpected upheavals of my feelings were unquenchable now. Everything that had happened up until now...I couldn't take them back. I could only prepare for the future. And the first step towards that was making sure that none of those things would ever happen to again. She deserved the best and I wasn't it.

I was nearly level with where Lieutenant Dike was sitting on the ground, lifeless and surrounded by men looking for a leader. I flew down on them, grabbing Dike around the collar of his uniform a little harder than necessary.

"I'm taking over," I said, my voice surprisingly steady as I was less than calm at the moment. My hands were shaking, my pulse was racing, and my legs felt as if they would turn into a puddle at any second. Dike gave a nod, the kind that showed me that he'd been only half-way in reality for a very long time. Barely containing the urge to roll my eyes, I shouted for the first man I could see to tell me the situation.

"Sergeant Lipton! What've we got?!"

"Most of the Company's spread out here, sir. And Lieutenant Dike has first platoon doing a flanking mission around the rear. They're stretched out sir, pinned by a sniper. I think he's in the building with the caved in roof, sir." I did a quick assessment, deciding on my feet what we should do so that we got out of this without too many more casualties. Seeing the faces of the men around me put things into perspective. They had been sitting in frozen foxholes for the past month. They were tired, cold, and hungry. Each one of them was exhausted from lack of all those things that make the most difference to a man when they're taken away. And if things were bad for the men, I wondered how Adelina was faring with all of this. I mentally shook myself, urging my thoughts to stay away from Adelina and anything that would remind me of her.

"Alright, Sergeant. I want grenade launchers on that building until its gone. When its gone, I want first platoon to go straight in. Forget going around. Think you can handle that?" I slapped his arm and moved around him to lead the company into Foy. I could hear Lipton's, "Yes sir" right before he sprang into action. As he called out orders, I jumped to my feet, deciding to brave death for a second time.

I couldn't explain why I wanted this so much, but it was so much easier to take the cowards way out.

_Coward..._ Unwanted, unbidden, Adelina's voice rang through my mind like a sharpened knife. It sliced me in and out, making me doubt myself once again. Was this really what I wanted? Was there really no hope for us? I didn't think that there was, and it filled me with such sorrow that my head and heart began to burn with it.

I took a deep breath and threw myself up against the side of a building, successfully blocking out the voices and the thoughts that went with them. Lipton and another sergeant with a radio on his back slid in next to me. I motioned for Lipton to take my spot on the edge of the building. He nodded his head and followed my order. He hesitated a moment before leaning around the building. A moment later, a cry rang out in my ears and I almost reached for him to see if he was alright. Thoughts of the two men I'd gotten killed on D-Day raced through my brain and pierced me straight to the core. There was another reason to end my life. I was so careless. Not just with my feelings about Adelina but also with the lives of my fellow soldiers that I was sure that everyone would be better off without me.

"What do you see?" I asked him, unable and unwilling to show that I was worried. Lipton glanced at me for a moment before turning back to look at the rest of Foy.

"Infantry, a lot of infantry," he explained quickly.

"I Company's supposed to be on the other side of the town. Do you see them?" We'd done our job, now it was time for I company to do theirs and I had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that they were having to pull back.

"Sir, I think they're gonna have to pull back if we don't hook up with them soon." I stared into his eyes, seeing my own fear reflected back at me.

I saw my opportunity flash before my eyes. It was my last chance to do what I'd set out to do. It was the defining moment of my future. Of Adie's future and I had no intentions of screwing it up this time. I felt my lips set into a firm, determined line. I slapped Lipton's leg and stood up.

"It's alright. I'll be right back. Wait here," I shouted at him as I took off through the mania that had settled on the town of Foy. I ran through it, trying not to think of anything but the task ahead of me. Much to my dismay, the Germans were so surprised that they didn't shoot at me right away. When they did, something continued to urge me on. I couldn't explain it. It was like some invisible hand was shielding me, guiding me through the whirling bullets and past the wall where I Company was fighting just as hard as we were. I told them the situation and then I was back over the wall again. My legs moved faster beneath me than ever before and I knew that it was my cowardice that was leading me forward. I was too much of a coward to end my own life for the happiness of the woman I loved. I was too afraid of death to accept it as a real man would.

What I really wanted, which was unattainable now, was to crawl into the comfort of Adelina's arms. I wanted her to tell me that she still loved me and that she wanted to be with me. I wished that I could tell her all my secrets and for her to tell me that none of it mattered. That she would always be there for me no matter the curve balls that Life was waiting to throw our way.

But I knew, deep down, that it wasn't meant to be. So, all I could do was continue to lead the attack on Foy, living all the while with the knowledge that I couldn't even kill myself without messing it up. That's what hurt the most. It was just another failure to add to my list. It was yet another reason why I was less than what Adelina deserved. Just another reminder that no matter what I did, I would never be enough for her.

**And so goes the end of this chapter. I haven't even touched this chapter in about a week. So, I was surprised when I reread it and found how much I liked it. This one is really essential. Especially for the events of next chapter. Before I go off on that tangent, I am SO sorry for leaving this dormant on my laptop for so long without posting. I've been trying for the past three chapters to try and get at least a chapter ahead of you guys before posting, but I think that two weeks is a little bit ridiculous for me to go between posts. So, here I am giving this to you all when I haven't finished 28 yet. lol**

**Huge thank you to captain ty, Iloveboyswhosparkle, sezq, AivieEnchanted, PaperHeart382, Sairahiniel, and pirate-muffins-13 for reviewing last chapter and for providing me with the inspiration to continue to write this story even when I thought that i couldn't really go on. The muse seems to be in rare form lately, so hopefully she can harness that and get all of 28 done tonight. idk, we'll see. happy reading and if you have the time, please review. Thanks guys!**


	28. Chapter 28

Adelina's POV

I watched Ron go with a sinking feeling churning in the pit of my stomach. It hadn't sunk in yet-and I hadn't realized just how much my decision to stay away from him had reverberated through our lives, I turned to Dick with questions in my eyes. Staring into those two placid pools of icy blue, I could hold onto some semblance of normalcy. Something that I hadn't felt since Mourmelon when Ron had held me in his arms. I could feel my lips trembling as the winter breeze caressed them like the ghosts of long fingers. I closed my eyes for a moment, soaking in the feeling. When I opened my eyes again, all I could see was worry in Dick's eyes.

"Dick, what's happened to him? He's....it was like he couldn't see anything," I asked him, true fear making my heart and my hands shake in trepidation. Imagining the way his brown eyes stared into nothing sent shivers up my spine and made me tremble in the face of truth. I knew what I was doing. I was going to Dick again for answers, hoping against hope that he would be able to fix things again. The need to know what was going on behind Ron's empty expression was too much for me to handle. It was a need bordering on obsessive that was clawing at the backs of my eyes and throat.

As I stared at him, Dick's lips parted and he wrung his hands. His eyes shifted for a moment to the line, where he should be, before settling on me again.

"Adie," he began tentatively, "I've got to get out to the line." His gaze fell to the ground, as if he was ashamed of something. Of having to put his duty over me, or about what he might be trying to hide from me? I couldn't be sure, but the confusion bubbling up inside me forced words from my mouth.

"Dick, please," I said, my voice nothing more than a whisper blowing in the wind, "Dick, what happened to him?" I could feel a small fissure forming somewhere in my already fractured soul. There was a thought riding the fine line of unconscious realization. It was slowly but surely getting closer and closer to the surface, but whether or not it would make itself known to me before it was too late was unclear. I knew that whatever it was had to be about Ron's current state. And I was desperate to get answers. So, I walked toward Dick and grabbed his hand. His skin was smooth and cold against mine and it had that same calming affect on me that his eyes did. He looked down at me and cupped my cheek.

The look on his face was indescribable. Something between concern of hurting me and fear of saying the wrong thing. He leaned forward to plant a tender kiss to my forehead.

"Are you sure you want me to tell you?" He was giving me the option to back out if I wanted to. I considered it, but then the sight of Ron walking by me without responding at all flashed through my mind, and I declined his offer immediately.

"I have to know how to take that look out of his eyes, Dick. If it's something I did...I can't live with myself knowing that he's so dead inside because of me." He nodded suddenly and leaned backwards slightly so that he could look into my eyes while he explained to me.

"When he came back from Bastogne after he saved you, something changed in him. I can't really explain it. It was like he wasn't there at all when I gave him the orders for Dog to be in reserve for this one, Adie. I don't know what happened out there, but whatever it was, it just shattered him." As something was on the verge of collapsing inside me, I felt my knees grow weak and I leaned heavily on Dick in an attempt to keep myself on my feet. I bit my lip suddenly to keep the cries searing my chest from permeating the air. I breathed heavily through my nose, aware of Dick's soft voice sounding in my ear as he said my name. I could hear the concern in his tone as if he was on the other side of a thick glass wall.

Coming back into myself, I turned my focus on him. His eyebrows were furrowed and he was gripping me for dear life.

"Adie, are you alright?" I shook my head, realizing that it was the first time I'd ever been honest when someone asked me that. When Dick's lips parted in surprise and he held me tighter, I sent him a small smile.

"I'm alright enough, Dick. I-I don't know quite how to put what I'm feeling into words," I said vaguely.

"You're sure? If I leave you alone, you aren't going to try and-." I didn't give him the opportunity to finish his sentence.

"No, Dick, I won't ever try that again if that's what you're worried about. I guess I realized that retreating into myself isn't the best way to handle things," I said, my voice pounding softly in my ears. The man before me nodded, satisfied for the moment with my answer.

When the yell rang out from the line for Dick, I let go of him suddenly. I couldn't explain the feelings coursing through my veins, but I did know that I wanted to be alone for a while. I couldn't handle the feel of Dick's hands on me when all I wanted was to be in Ron's arms.

"You should go," I muttered, knowing how horrible it sounded. But Dick seemed to understand what I couldn't say for myself. He took a slow step toward me and took my hand. He patted it affectionately and then let it drop back to my side. In that simple gesture, I could feel all the care and love he felt for me. It imprinted itself on my brain and made me believe for a second that perhaps things between Ron and I could work out for the best.

"I'll send for you if anything happens, Adie," Dick said and then he faded into the mist floating between the trees. As soon as I was alone, I sank to my knees and wrapped my arms around my torso. I felt a cold penetrating into the deepest caverns of my body and I could do nothing to stop the procession. So, all I could do was hug myself. It gave the illusion of being safe from the fear creeping up on me. Even so, I'd never felt more alone in my entire life. And I wondered at the fact that it was seeing Ron so broken that made me feel so helpless and insignificant. I felt lost in a world filled with heart-ache and pain. The sorrow rocked my body for what seemed like an eternity before I heard a voice that shook me to my roots.

"Speirs!" Dick's voice echoed through the forest and reverberated in my ears. My stomach fell to the floor and I jumped to my feet on impulse. My throat was constricting painfully and I knew why. Something in me was screaming for me to get out to the line. I could feel the tension in the air that always accompanied a moment in life when Fate decides to take the reins in a person's life. And if I knew anything about Fate was that it didn't always do what you wanted it to.

Without a second's hesitation, I rushed forward. Struggling under an invisible burden towards the outer edges of the Bois Jacques where Second Battalion was assembled. Slowly, steadily-the image of Ron listening intently to what Dick was saying materialized before my eyes. I was so close. Close enough to see the firm set of Ron's mouth and shoulders as he jogged toward Dick. His eyes were no longer empty. They held a flicker of insanity that had my spine crawling. But before I had the opportunity to take another step forward, Ron started down the hill, his legs carrying him farther and farther away from me.

"No," I screamed, the pain and terror ripping at me until every inch of me was raw nerves. The sound penetrated the air and carried through the wind until I was sure the entire world could hear my anguish. I could see startled eyes meeting mine as they looked back at the source of the scream. But, I only had eyes for that slowly diminishing figure on the hill down to Foy. Trying to pull myself together, I made one last mad dash toward Ron. At the risk of my own safety, I wanted to see him safe. But I knew somehow that wasn't going to happen as I caught sight of the mortar round falling toward him from the sky. All I could see and hear was that mortar round. My mind seemed to explode into a million different pieces, each of them trying to make sense of the scene before me. Because of my own confusion and denial, I started forward again and was only stopped when a strong arm came around my waist and pulled me to him. My heart snapped back into place and rose to a pounding crescendo in my ears while I watched the mortar fall on Ron.

It was the moment my world shattered once again into a thousand pieces. And I realized then that without Ron, there was nothing left to live for. So, I embraced the darkness flirting around the edges of my mind until I could feel no more.

***

The wind stabbing me like a million needles in the face was enough to wake me from the horrible nightmare that had become my reality. I choked, recognizing the irony of the situation as my eyelids fluttered open. Only a few short weeks ago, he'd saved me from death and I was unable to do the same. And I couldn't even muster the pain that should have been eating away at me. Instead, I was filled with a disturbing numbness that made it impossible to fee anything but confusion and an intense dread about what I might do in the future.

I didn't know what I would do with myself now that he was gone. My eyes fell closed again and I felt the ghosts of falling tears sparking to life in my eyes and rolling down my cheeks. I even mustered a small sob, but it was more of an act than anything. A mixture of habit and the need to feel that physical release that for some reason was alluding me.

As my eyesight solidified, I noticed that the sky was dark. A mixture of blue and black swirls with patches of white stars peeping out at me from behind the thin clouds. I tried to sit up and only managed knocking someone's ribs.

"Hey! Watch it!" I heard the familiar voice shout over the wind rattling in our ears. I turned, my expression lightening only slightly with the sight of Lipton sitting beside me.

"Sorry Lip," I said, making sure that my voice was just loud enough for him to hear. I could feel the energy draining from me already as if all of the life was gone from me. My will to live was such that I would have given anything to pull the pistol out of Lipton's pocket and end my suffering. The squeeze of my hand alerted me to the fact that my neighbor was talking to me again.

"Are you alright?" Lipton asked me, the concern evident in his eyes. I looked into those two orbs and felt an intense drive to tell him that I wasn't alright. That the love of my life, the man I'd wanted with all my heart to live the rest of my life with, was gone. But I couldn't do that. Here was a man who was the heart and soul of a company of men who couldn't have done anything to earn more respect. He had the weight of the world on his shoulders and he hadn't broken down once during the whole of our time in Bastogne. I bit my tongue as the words threatened to overpower my sense of justice. Telling Lipton that I was unsure how to go on without Ron would have been a disaster. But I couldn't help it as the words tumbled from my lips.

"What happened? After I-I passed out?" I couldn't help the way my voice cracked as I thought about why I'd passed out in the first place. My fingers curled in on themselves, trying to grasp onto anything solid to keep me grounded and sane before I floated away into the clouds. Lip threaded his fingers through mine before opening his mouth.

"Well, you passed out. And then we had to drag you down to Foy and then on to Noville. You stayed behind in a truck there while we took the town. And now we're on our way to Rechamps. I'm guessing that we'll be staying there the night. It's pretty late now." I stared at him, into his honest and open face and wondered if I should ask the question that was slowly burning me alive inside.

"And Ron?" The slight furrow forming between Lipton's eyes had me correcting myself, "Lieutenant Speirs?" Understanding and sorrow filled his expression and I had doubled over my knees before I knew it.

"Adie?!" Lipton gasped and pulled me into his side, "What's wrong? I thought you'd be happy about it." I pulled back from him in disgust. I knew that Ron had been anything but friendly since Holland, but happiness was something I was sure I would never feel over his being gone in the world. Tears rushed to my eyes and I wiped them angrily away.

"How could I be happy about that Lip?" The confusion widened his eyes further and a slightly shy smile curled his lips.

"Am I missing something? The last I heard, Adie, you and Sparky were pretty into each other. Did something happen?" I gaped at him like a fish out of water. If he thought he was missing something, then I knew I must have. Pain made my mouth tremble in the frosty air, but I had to push past it.

"Ron, he's-he's d-," but I strangled on the word and could go no further. I silently willed Lipton to suddenly understand what I was trying to say. I couldn't do this. Saying it out loud was like making his death an unrelenting fact that would be the turning point in my life. And like a plunger being pulled from a drain, I felt the flood gates fling open to bare my open, raw wounds to the world. I could feel fear, a profound sorrow, and anger suddenly poking at me from all sides. Through a dim haze that had filled my mind, I became aware of Lipton's voice flowing in and out of tune. It was like fiddling with a radio station that you desperately wanted to listen to but didn't care enough to spend the energy it would take to really hear what song was being sung. Under that fog, the world came to a stuttering halt and one voice ringing out through the convoy stopped my heart.

For a moment, I wondered if I was hallucinating, a sick trick of my mind to try and bring Ron back from the dead. His voice, just as cold and distant as I'd known it to be before, floated above the mass of bodies surrounding me and seemed to stab through the thick fog and made everything click back into place. I turned my eyes on Lipton and saw him giving me the biggest smile I'd ever seen.

"I guess you were the one who was missing something, sweetheart." Then he jerked his head towards the place where I most wanted to be as if to say, 'go get him.' I wasted no time in jumping off the back of the truck and doing just that. My chest was fit to burst as I saw him materialize in front of my eyes like the appearance of the sun that has been hiding behind the clouds for too long. Seeing him made the warmth and love I felt radiating through my chest flow through my body. It made me feel more alive than I ever had and I found how easy it was to accept that he was really alive. Some part of me wanted to cup his neck and feel the rush of life through his veins under my fingers. Another part couldn't quite believe that only two minutes ago, this realization had been the stuff of dreams and blind hope. But the most dominant part of me accepted it because it was the only thing I could do. Believing that he was alive ensured that I would also live. Thinking that this was just a very cruel figment of my imagination was a death sentence.

I listened patiently at the back of the group as he gave us our the instructions for the night. My heart flared at the knowledge that we would be staying in Rechamps and I found that the night held too many possibilities to count as heat pooled between my thighs. Blood rushed to the surface, bubbling just underneath my skin and making me shift anxiously from one foot to the other. And just as quickly as the men had gathered around him, they disappeared. I couldn't help but notice how broken and defeated they all looked. I wondered if I had the same set to my shoulders and the way my feet seemed to drag behind me.

Then, quite suddenly, I became aware of the man in front of me again. He let out a sigh that had me rushing forward to grip his arm in concern.

"Ron?" I asked, my voice soft and little more than a whisper against his skin. My voice seemed to stir something in him, but only for a moment. Then, it disappeared just as quickly. I would have given anything to take away that look in his eyes, but he brushed my hands away before I had the chance.

"Ron..." I called after him, my voice ringing through the foggy air and falling like a dead weight in the space between my body and his. All I could do was watch after him until it seemed like everything I'd hoped for was gone forever.

"Adelina?" I heard a familiar voice call me from my pain for a moment. I turned around, feeling like my heart was ripping in two from the effort to see Dick's face swim into view. In a moment, he'd crossed the short distance to me and had wrapped me in his warm embrace. His voice swam in and out of focus as I tried desperately to understand what was happening. It wasn't like before. Now, I knew there was no hope of him coming back to me. Because there was nothing left of him _to _come back.

And with a solid conviction that dizzied me, I realized that it was all my fault. The reminder of that day in Bastogne was like plunging a knife straight through my pulsing heart. It hurt so much I felt myself choking on the despair that I had no one to blame for but myself.

Then, suddenly, I became acutely aware of the way that Dick was holding me and all I wanted was to be alone. Lightly, I pushed away from his chest and stepped away from his comforting fingers with an apologetic smile. He watched me walk away from him with a sad flicker in his eyes, turning his eyes from icy blue to the deepest sapphire.

"Adie, what are you doing?" he asked, though I felt that he knew already.

"Dick, I think I should be alone. I-," I searched for the right thing to say to describe what I was feeling, "I'm tired of running to you for a shoulder to cry on. You weren't the one who made a mess of my life, Dick. I have to figure things out for myself sometimes." I reached between us and squeezed his hand. His fingers were warm and pliant to my touch and I could sense that he had forgiven me even before he'd acknowledged it.

"Are you sure, Adie?" I nodded, sending him a cheeky grin.

"Dick, I've gotten this far having to deal with Sparky haven't I?" I asked him, forgetting to mention that I'd given up once upon a time. If Dick was thinking of the same thing, his face revealed nothing hinting at the fact. He just nodded and leaned forward to kiss my cheek.

"Just be careful, okay. And you know that I'm always here for you. You can always come to me," he muttered in my ear. He let go of me before the shivers rolled down my spine, which were not so much from the cold penetrating through my uniform. I knew that they had everything to do with the fact that no matter how in love I was with Ron, there had been a time when I'd considered other options, and I didn't think I would ever forget them. I watched Dick go until I remembered that I had no idea where I was staying.

"Dick!" He faced me again, this time a small smirk framing his lips. I blushed slightly at the look, and thanked whoever might be listening that it was dark outside.

"Yes?"

"I don't know where I'm staying tonight."

"Oh! It's down this road. It should be the third one down. You're on the bottom level in the room at the very back of the house." I nodded and glanced back down the road where I'd seen Ron disappear.

"Okay, thanks, Dick. Good night," I muttered, then started off in the direction. I realized how exhausted I was again now that I had a bed to think of. A bed with real sheets and pillows.

"Good night, Adie. Enjoy sleeping in a house tonight. We're moving out in the morning."

"I know. I was listening to Speirs giving instructions to the men," I shot back, feeling a warmth in my heart at the chance to use my long-stored sarcasm at him. He seemed to be enjoying the humor in the situation too.

"I would have thought you'd be too busy staring at him to notice what he was saying," he responded, a grin coloring his voice.

"Oh I was doing that too. Good thing I can do two things at once, huh?" All I received was a light chuckle and then complete silence. The happiness drained from me at once and I was left feeling shaky. I'd never felt so alone as I did then, with the wind whistling through my ears and the silence so intense that it filled me with something I couldn't shake. I wondered how I could possibly switch so quickly through emotions. But, the thing that filled my ears in the next moment shook it instantly from my mind.

In my loneliness, I became aware of a noise. So light and frail that I was sure I'd imagined it. But then it reflected in my heart, piercing me through to the core when I realized who it was. I rushed forward, calling his name in the dark recesses of the buildings lining either side of the road.

"Ron? Please answer me! Where are you?" I shouted into the empty fog, my voice bridging on hysteria.

"I'm here," he said, his tone a mixture of wonderment and hope. It brought a slight smile to my face. Maybe things would be okay after all. I strained my eyes to catch sight of him and finally did. He was leaning against the door of a building. He was running his fingers gently through his hair and I wondered how long he'd been sitting like that. Cautiously, I walked forward and bent down in front of him. In the darkness, I couldn't tell if he was really seeing me again and I reached forward to grab one of his hands.

"Ron, it's me. It's Adelina. We h-have to get you inside," I said, my eyes filling with tears that stung the back of my throat. Being so close, when he turned those black orbs toward me, I could see that they were still dim and absent of that passionate burning I'd seen in them once. I relinquished my hold on his hand to unlock the door when he followed me to his feet. It pained me to see how empty he was. Knowing it was all my fault just made it that much worse. I wanted to pull him close and prove to him that I did love him, but I couldn't now. He was too far gone and no amount of sex would ever bring him out of it. With a relish, however, I hoped that letting him hold me close would be enough. It was more intimate, more discreet and I had a feeling that it just might work.

With a new-found confidence that I'd never thought possible, I grabbed his hand. I had to be strong now. For him and for myself. Otherwise, neither of us would find our way out of the black abyss we'd become in realizing that our love could be the beginning of the end for us. I shook my head to clear it.

"Which one is yours?" I asked him, making sure to let him lead the way. As through a trance, he lead me up the stairs and to his designated room. As I caught sight of the bed, I thanked God that he was an officer. Being in the upper ranks definitely had its privileges and I wasn't about to complain now.

I turned my eyes back to him and found him staring at me with his head tilted. His half-outstretched arm and flexing fingers showed me that he was waiting for something. Perhaps subconsciously, he knew that I was trying to reach him. Trying to get his forgiveness for the suffering he'd been through because of my rejection.

"Ron, I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you," I muttered, my voice thick with un-shed tears. I waited with baited breath for his response. It seemed like a lifetime had passed before he pulled me closer, his fingers waging heated wars along the bare skin of my hands as he slipped the gloves from my fingers.

"I can't believe you're here. I almost forgot what it was like to hold you," he muttered, his mouth close enough to my ear that I couldn't completely cover up the shudder that rolled the length of my spine. I exhaled a shaky breath and pulled him towards the bed. For a moment, he just stood there, silent as a ghost. Then, slowly, his fingers moved from mine to unbutton his jacket. Soon, he was in front of me with nothing on but his boxers. My eyes roved over his chiseled chest and perfectly sculpted abs. He was even more perfect than I'd remembered and it had my knees buckling beneath me. Before I hit the ground, however, his arms came around my waist. I looked up into his face and could see the glimmer of a smirk forming on his lips.

"I guess you haven't completely gotten over your fainting in front of me," he said, his voice husky against the skin of my neck. Choosing to ignore my now boiling blood, I pushed him gently away and started on my own uniform. My fingers were shaking so badly that I got to the third one and paused. I glanced up at Ron to see that he was watching me closely. Feeling suddenly very bold, I took his hands and put them on my jacket.

"Undress me," I told him. The small statement awakened something within him. The passion and lust I'd seen from him the night we made love was there again. It made the heat pool beneath my thighs and my fingers curl into themselves so that I wouldn't reach for him. In no time, he had undone my jacket and my pants and he threw my gloves down on the floor. Feeling only slightly self-conscious of my body, I stood in front of him in nothing but my t-shirt and my underwear.

It seemed like an eternity had passed before he leaned forward and grabbed my waist. His movements were soft, controlled, poised. As if he'd spent his entire life learning the steps of this dance we were acting out. With a soft thump, we fell together back onto the bed and simply lay there, staring into each others eyes. I could feel mine glistening with tears as I realized that this could be the beginning of a new turn in our relationship and even as I found myself flailing under the weight of this new pressure, his fingers laced themselves into my hair. He pulled my face toward his, stopping just short of his lips.

"I want this to be real," he muttered, the warm breeze of his breath rolling along my face and filling me with a feverish thirst for him.

"This is real," I assured him, my voice little more than a whisper. I closed the small gap between our mouths and kissed him with all the bottled up passion and emotion I could muster. The moan he let out in surprise was captured in my mouth. And I felt him grow firm beneath me. I pulled away from him, gasping for air and ran my hands over his chest.

"You know, as much as I'd love for this to escalate into something more. I think that for tonight, we should just go to sleep, Ron," I whispered. His eyes were two glistening jewels in the darkness as he observed me. For the longest time, I thought he might throw me out of his room. Then, one corner of his mouth drew up into that smirk I loved so much.

"And here I was thinking that I'd died and gone to heaven. But I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't be slighted by the most beautiful girl in the world if I were." I chuckled, trying not to let his comment about my looks make me get teary-eyed.

"You've got to stop saying things like that, or else I might start to believe you." I couldn't help the teasing smile that made its way into my expression. For that moment, it felt like everything would be okay between us.

Ron situated us at the top of the bed and made quick work of wrapping the blanket over us and pulling me as close to him as our bodies would allow. My heart swelled slightly at the possessive way in which his hand splayed its fingers along my back.

"Ron?" I asked, my voice echoing into the dark abyss surrounding us. I heard him groan and took that as a cue to continue. I craned my neck and kissed him on the lips.

"I love you." I didn't give him the chance to reply, just snuggled into his chest. I knew that somewhere deep inside of me, I wanted to hear the words that rumbled from his chest after those precious seconds of deafening silence.

"I love you, Adelina." After that, we both fell silent. I lay still, waiting until his hold on me slackened and his chest began to rise and fall in a slow, steady pace. Even though it was breaking my heart to leave him, I didn't want anything to spoil the perfectness of the night. So, I did the only thing I could do. I slipped my clothes back on and fled from the room as quickly and quietly as I could. Failing to remember the gloves Ron had thrown on top of his own pile of clothes.

**Okay I've got a new poll up on my profile. Not sure if you guys have seen it. But yeah it's there. So, go and vote on that. I'll give it another couple of days. And then I'll pick whatever song that wins for the song for chapter one. :)**

**I really hope you guys like this chapter. I know I loved it. And captain ty did too. So, please review and give me some feedback for this one. That way I can get through chapter 30 even faster. Chapter 29 should be up sometime next week. Around about Thursday or Friday. **

**Oh! And before I forget, I have some thank yous to hand out. As always, HUGE thank you to captain ty, who has been an enormous inspiration and help for these last couple of chapters. And thank yous also to pirate-muffins-13, sezq, AivieEnchanted, Sairahiniel, and whoever else has read the story over the past month. I really appreciate it and it really does make me write faster. :D**


	29. Chapter 29

Speirs' POV

I woke from my dreams half-expecting to find her lying asleep in my arms. My dream had been so real. So tangible that I could still feel the passion and anticipation in the air.

_She looked up at me with green eyes glistening like emeralds. Taking my hands in her own, she placed them on the front of her uniform and gave me a smile that managed to be shy and bold at the same time. _

"_Undress me." _

If the heat throbbing through my veins wasn't enough evidence that I was still feeling the effects of those words on me, I didn't know what was. I could still sense that cold, ivory skin flowing freely and smoothly beneath my fingers. I could feel her pulse quicken as I brushed gently against that ticking vein in her neck. The taste of her lips and the inside of her mouth still lingered on my tongue.

I shook my head, wishing that last night had been as real as it had felt.

"_This is real." Her voice was a whisper against my skin, making my spine curl and roll in a quick succession. She bent forward, a dangerous glint in her eyes, and kissed me with all the passion she could. I returned the kiss with a mutual desperation and need that I felt I had to match. When her tongue grazed along my bottom lip, I moaned. The noise and the feel of her tongue sweeping inside my mouth made me grow hard beneath her. _

"God damn it all!" I growled, my fingers raking through my hair as I tried to forget about the dream. Forget that the only thing that had happened last night was that I'd come back to my room and fallen asleep. She hadn't been in my room at all, no matter how much I'd like to have believed that it was true.

Feeling the need to put my hands to use, I crossed the room and bent down to retrieve my pants from the pile I'd thrown them in after getting undressed last night. As my fingers grazed the rough material, my eyes caught something else lying on the floor. Dropping the pants as quickly as I could, I grabbed the small objects.

My fingers traced over the stiff contours, feeling what remnants of her warmth had been in them. I couldn't remember the last time I'd seen them. As if the thought was a firefly in my head, it shown the light on the glove in my hand. She had been here. The dream from last night might not have been a dream after all. The only question left buzzing through my veins was...

_Why didn't she stay?_

Adelina's POV

I was throwing things around frantically, looking for my gloves. The last thing I remembered was Ron taking them off and throwing them on the floor.

_But I'd grabbed them. I wouldn't be so stupid as to have left them there. _

As I searched through my foot locker for a third time, I realized that I had left them. I groaned, letting my breath mingle with the stale air. I hung my head for a moment, but my self-loathing was interrupted by a knock on the door. My head whipped toward the noise so fast I was sure that I had broken it. My heart started up a rapid tempo and I knew it would pound out of my chest with just one more beat.

"Just a minute," I called, my voice hoarse and very unlike my own. Whoever it was, they seemed to respect me enough to wait. Somewhere in the depths of my soul, I knew it was him. I could feel his presence even now closing in around me. I opened my eyes, realizing for the first time that they had closed.

With shaking legs and damp hands, I managed to get to my feet. With every step, I could feel myself shrinking more and more into myself. When I was within reaching distance of the door handle, I paused. My terror at Ron being on the other side of that door was too much. What was he going to say to me? Had last night meant anything to him?

"Adie, open the door," I heard his voice say through the thick wooden slab. Then, with a great effort, he added, "Please." Before I even knew what I was doing, my fingers closed around the stinging metal and had pulled the door open.

Paled by the backdrop of black trees and buildings and white crystals floating through the air, Ron was as handsome as he'd ever been to me. Possibly more so given his vulnerable state last night.

We stood there, eye to eye. Each gauging the others reactions. I didn't know what he saw in my expression. Fear, happiness, anxiety?

"Good morning," he said quietly. He was probably thinking that at any sudden movement or sound, I would bolt and slam the door in his face. Little did he know that I was frozen in place. Mesmerized and exalted by the warmth rolling from his body towards mine. My skin was humming, waiting for him to close the distance and touch me. But he didn't.

"G-good morning," I said. My voice was little more than a whisper and my anxiety slipped through the cracks into that simple greeting. I was watching him so closely that I saw immediately the change in his eyes. There was a flicker of something there. And at the same time, a smirk graced his lips for a moment. In that smile, I could see that he wanted the same things I did. He was just much better at hiding them. He glanced down at his hands, which I could now see had something in them.

"I thought you might be missing these," he muttered, not bothering to hold them out to me yet. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"Oh, yes I was looking for them this morning. T-thank you," I said, my teeth chattering from the gust of wind that now blew through my hair. Concern etched his voice as his feet drew him closer to me.

"We should get you inside." I stepped aside, thinking that he was going to follow me in. When he didn't, I turned back to look at him. He was smiling slightly, his head cocked to the side. His hand was stretched toward me, the gloves lying limp and cold in his fingers.

"You're not coming in?" I asked him. I couldn't' keep the confusion and desperation from my tone.

He shook his head, still smiling, "No, I have to meet with Colonel Sink in ten minutes, love." My heart jumped into my throat, rendering me speechless.

_Love? He'd never called me that before._

His footsteps echoed in my ears as he stepped closer.

"But I'll be back soon. I just wanted to give these to you," he said and pressed the gloves into my palm. His skin brushed against mine and I couldn't help but lean into his touch.

"Ron," I moaned. It was the first thing I'd said in five minutes and it made him tense up immediately. My fingers froze against mine and I felt the rough fibers of the gloves slipped from his hands. His arm came around my waist and he backed me slowly into a wall. I could feel his breath blowing warm and moist against my ear before he whispered, "Why did you leave last night?" My heart was pounding through my veins, but I found the strength to reply.

"I don't know," I lied, hoping that he couldn't hear the slight hysteria in my voice. I could feel his smile as he pressed his face into the crook of my neck. He planted a fleeting kiss there before leaning away from me.

"You're lying, Adie," he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. I could only stare at him before he leaned in even closer. His lips hovered an inch away from mine. Tantalizing, begging to be kissed. He stared at me, waiting for me to make the first move for once. My fingers curled around the front of his jacket and I pulled him to me.

The brush of his lips against mine sent sparks flying through my body. His moan sent a pool of heat shooting through my veins and I had to lean away from him to stop myself from dragging him upstairs. He followed my every move. His lips drove themselves harder against mine and his tongue demanded entrance into my mouth. When I let him in, he seemed to be drinking me in. The way his tongue was probing me made me think that he was memorizing every line, every curve of the inside of my mouth. His arousal pressed hard and erect against my leg. I came back to myself suddenly and forced him away from me.

"You have to go to your meeting," I muttered, my voice husky from the lust still threatening to cloud my mind. He stared long and hard at me before looking down to where my fingers were still holding him to me.

"I would, but you seem to be hanging on to me pretty tightly, Adie." I blushed, surprised that he could still make me do it, and let go hesitantly. I felt disappointment flood through me and hung my head to look at the ground. His fingers tightened around my chin and he tilted my head upward.

"I'll be back. Don't look so broken-hearted, baby." I managed a small smile before he slipped away into the early morning mist. My tingling lings drew the attention of my fingers. I touched them gently. I could still feel the electricity humming just beneath that thin layer of skin. The heat was bubbling through my blood and I was finding it very difficult to breathe.

I couldn't believe that all of my pain and suffering could vanish so completely in a few short minutes. For the first time in months, I felt whole. The shattered pieces of my heart were drifting back together. Slowly but surely and I knew it had everything to do with Ron. I couldn't begin to hope that this would last. But for now, I would enjoy it and make the most of our time together.

***

"Adie! You've got twenty minutes to pack all this shit up and get it into the back of second platoon's truck," I heard a voice call as he passed by my room. I groaned and ran out to frown at the owner of that voice.

"Always the gentleman, Nix. Mind coming and helping this helpless damsel pack her things?" I sent him my most flirtatious smile. The booming laugh that coursed through his chest and filled the air warmed my heart. Hearing any of these men laugh now was a miracle after all they'd gone through.

"Adelina, you're probably about ten seconds away from being ready to go. If anything, you should come and help me pack," Nix called over his shoulder. I could see the playful grin curling his lips, and couldn't help but feel a bit flustered.

_Damn his charm._

"I think I'll pass, Lew. Thanks for offering, but I'd really rather not brave it."

"Have it your way. Maybe Sparky will come and help you. He seemed sort of dazed when he came into the meeting anyway. I'm thinking it must have had something to do with that steamy make-out session the two of you were having in your door-way?" I stared after him, my mouth dropping open in astonishment. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks and struggled to find the right combination of words to reply.

"Lewis Nixon?! Were you watching us?"

"I couldn't really help it, Adie. I was getting the feeling that the two of you were about to rip each others clothes at any moment and I didn't want to miss the show." I glared after him, unable to be completely furious with him because of the way his eyes were glinting when he stopped and turned to see my reaction.

"You're a bloody arse, you know that?" Nixon shrugged, the humor in his expression evident in that smirk that curled his lips skyward and the light in his eyes.

"So I've been told. I guess going to Yale really does make me an arrogant, rich jerk." He turned around and continued on his way towards where he was staying while I was left in his wake with nothing to do but to throw my hands into the air and do the same. I stomped back to my room and packed as quickly as I could. When I was done, I grabbed my footlocker and made my way out to where I assumed the trucks would be waiting. A few of the boys were already standing there with their bags in hand. Out of the group, I could see the exhausted, but smiling faces, belonging to Lipton, Malarkey, Martin, Heffron, Cobb, and Jackson. Cobb, being the closest, walked over to me and slung his arm around my shoulders. He gave me a light hug before letting his arm slide back to his side.

"Hey Kid! How you holding up?" Heffron called, giving me one of the warmest smiles I'd ever seen. I shrugged playfully as I settled between him and Malarkey in the loose circle of men.

"I'm fine. The real question is how are all of you?" As I said this, I encountered a set of fingers twisting themselves in mine in desperation. I glanced down, making sure that I wasn't imagining it. I gasped slightly as I saw that it was Malarkey's hand that was holding mine. I gave his frozen fingers a quick squeeze, before turning my attention back to the others. Heffron was making a joke, causing all of the guys to laugh. I attempted a small smirk, but I knew I hadn't quite managed it.

My mind was suddenly on other things. Things I didn't want to think about at all. But, Malarkey's grasp was making it difficult to focus on anything other than all of the men who should have been with us but weren't. I could feel tears prick at the backs of my eyes as the faces of Guarnere, Muck, Penkala, Heffron, Toye, Gordon, Welsh, and all of the other men who had suffered through Bastogne flowed in a quick succession before me. I gave a shuddering sigh that was barely loud enough to carry to my own ears. Malarkey tensed beside me, and I knew that he was thinking the same things. The rest of the group was focused on Martin now. I couldn't hear what he was saying, but it brought smiles to their strained faces, which was all that mattered. If they could find happiness in this frozen wasteland, perhaps there was hope for all of us to live through this terrible war.

Time seemed to stretch into eternity when you couldn't see the end of something so horrific. None of us had any idea when the war was going to end and it worried me. When was the time for going back to the lives that were still on hold for the sake of saving the world from total annihilation? When was our time for building homes, getting married, and having children?

I didn't know the answer, and it terrified me beyond anything that had happened to me thus far. And even if I did know, then what was my future? I knew that whatever it was, I wanted Ron to be a part of it. It wasn't possible for me to imagine live without him and I didn't want to try. The shaking of my arm got my attention. I turned my head and saw Malarkey beside me, his face contorted in worry.

"Adie, are you okay?" he asked me, his voice quiet and empty of all emotions except the concern he felt for me. I squeezed his fingers.

"I'm fine. Just thinking," I turned around to see everyone piling into the trucks, "Guess we should get on, huh?" Malarkey gave me a shy grin, a ghost of what it had been before his friends had been killed.

"Yeah I guess we should. Come on," he lifted his bag onto his shoulder and walked beside me towards second platoon's truck. I couldn't keep the stab of pain from raging within my heart as I saw how empty it was. I felt Malarkey tense next to me as he felt the same thing. I turned toward him, the tears unchecked in my eyes this time and felt my heart broke when I saw the hurt reflected back at me in his expression. Suddenly feeling like it was the right thing to do, I reached forward and enfolded Malarkey in my arms. He buried his face in my neck and let his shoulders shake for a moment before he pulled away from me. He gave me a smile full of sorrow, showing me that he was okay but still broken almost beyond repair.

"I miss them so much, Adie. I just wish that I could be numb sometimes. It's better than feeling like this all the time," he told me, his voice little more than a whisper. As if talking any louder would make it any less painful. As if admitting it to anyone other than me would be a crime against everything we stood for.

"I miss them too, Don, but this will pass. It takes time, but eventually, they just become a dull ache. It won't ever entirely fade, but some days will be better than others." He stared at me, a small glimmer of hope shining in his eyes.

"Hey! Lovebirds, get in the truck!" Heffron called to us from where he was already sitting down. We turned and rolled our eyes, but climbed onto the truck just the same. As I sat down in the spot beside Heffron, I noticed a pair of dark eyes trained on me. I blushed suddenly, unable to keep that heat from rising in my cheeks. I did manage to keep eye contact and gave him a shy smile. The smirk that settled over his features made my heart jump into my throat and my face to flush anew. That look held the promise that he would finish what he started before his meeting. And I found my veins filling with liquid fire at the thought of his lips on mine again. I found my hands shaking with delight and anticipation. I folded them over my stomach and leaned back against the truck railing to try and focus on anything other than the eyes I could still feel were trained on me.

"You okay, Adie?" Babe asked beside me, giving my shoulder a gentle nudge. I peeped an eye open to look at him and smiled, though I knew it was forced.

"Yeah, I'm just tired. I think I'll take a nap. Wake me up when we get there, yeah?" Babe flicked me on the arm playfully, nodding all the while.

"You know, it's hard to forget you're a Brit when you talk like that."

"Good," I smirked, getting comfortable as the trucks began to roll away from Rechamps, "I wouldn't want any of you to forget that I'm not a bloody Yank."

"Hey, we saved your asses numerous times during this thing. The Red Devils mean anything to ya?" Heffron asked me.

"Yes, but I wasn't the one being saved. I've been with you lot since D-Day, Babe," I remarked. I was greeted with blissful silence from my companion.

"Alright," he finally relented, "You've got me there. But you do have to admit that you've enjoyed your time with us." This time, I sat up and looked at him.

"Of course I have, Babe. I wouldn't trade knowing any of you for the world," I admitted. All of the guys gave me fond smiles before settling back into whatever they had been doing before I said that. Babe threw an arm around me and I let my head fall against his shoulder.

"We feel the same way, Adie."

***

"Let's go!" Malarkey shouted to the rest of the truck as the truck came to a stuttering halt. Webster, who'd just come back from the hospital after being gone for four months, was in a heated discussion with Liebgott and Heffron. I couldn't blame them for being slightly resentful of Webster. They'd suffered through hell and back in Bastogne, and he'd missed all the action.

Heffron helped me off the back of the truck and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek.

"See you later, Adie. I can't stand to be around that guy any more," he muttered in my ear before turning away from me and following the rest of Easy towards the houses they'd be staying in. I focused my attention on what Malarkey was saying to Webster instead.

"...talk to Captain Speirs. Make sure he wants you with us."

"Speirs? What happened to Captain Winters?" I clapped Webster on the back and gave him a small smile.

"He's running the battalion now, Web. Why don't you come with me and we'll get you situated? I was going to Easy's CP anyway." The silence stretched unchecked between us. It wasn't uncomfortable, for which I was thankful for.

"So, when did Winters get promoted?" I gave him a playful smile.

"Right after you left, actually." For a moment, he stared solemnly at the ground.

"I didn't mean to rile the guys up back there-," he began to say, but I held up my hand.

"You don't have to explain to me, David. It'll take them a while, but they'll come back around. Trust me." With that, we came upon Easy's CP. I led the way in, making sure to step around the fallen rubble on the ground. Just as I glanced up, Ron disappeared from my sight into one of the other rooms of the building. I shook my head and turned my attention on Lipton, who'd just come down with Pneumonia the night in Rechamps. I crossed the room towards him and pushed him down into the sofa in the middle of the room.

"You stay there, I'll get you a blanket." I went into the room where Luz was. He gave me a cheeky grin when he saw me.

"And to what do I owe this honor?" I giggled, surprised at how wonderful it sounded to my own ears.

"I was looking for a blanket for Lip. Do you have any lying around?"

"I do," Luz said and turned around to rifle through a cardboard box. He straightened up after a second and handed me an army-issued blanket.

"Thanks, George," I smiled and kissed his prickly cheek. When I returned to the room, a tall lanky Lieutenant held Lipton's attention. I eyed him critically. He hadn't noticed me yet, or if he had, he wasn't showing it. With his clean-shaven face and pale white skin, he looked like a kid no more than seventeen. I leaned over Lipton and spread the blanket out across him.

"There you go, Lip. You need anything else? Coffee?" I could feel the Lieutenant's eyes bulging slightly at my feminine voice and subtle curves, but I was trying to ignore him. Lipton gave me a teasing smile before nodding.

"Yeah, that'd be great, Adie. Thank you. Would you like a coffee, sir?" He collected himself long enough to shake his head.

"No, thank you."

"Okay, sir, well Captain Speirs should be back any minute. So, you can take a seat while you're waiting if you'd like." By the time I'd poured Lipton's coffee and came back with it, Ron was walking into the room. His eyes drifted to meet mine for a second before he glanced at Lipton.

"Sir, this is Lieutenant Jo-," he began to explain before Ron cut him off.

"For Christ's sake! Will you go in the back and sack up? There's some beds back there with fresh sheets," he said and turned to me. He waved me over and I went to him eagerly. I couldn't help the shaking of my legs and hands as I made my way toward him. He pulled me close, his fingers entwining with mine.

"Could you get me some coffee, too?" he asked, his breath drifting in a lazy mist along the skin of my neck. His lips were so close I could feel the vibrations of those soft, supple lines on my own bare skin. The shudder that rolled down my spine was enough to make me weak in the knees. But somehow, I managed to mutter a quick, "Of course," before moving away from him and pouring him a cup. The steam rising in wispy tendrils to stroke my chilled fingers took the shaking away and left me feeling slightly more in control of my emotions.

Until I heard the words spill from Dick's mouth as he rushed into the room alongside Nixon.

"Listen up!" he called out to all of us, running a hand nervously through his red hair. I turned my attention to him, the cup slipping out of my hand as Ron took it from me. He gave me a smile which stole my breath away and I returned it weakly.

"Regiment wants a patrol for prisoners." The simple declaration sent a shot of fear through my stomach and up my throat. How many more men would have to die to serve this mission? It was a blatant reminder that the war was not over yet, even if things did feel like they were winding down.

"This one comes straight from Colonel Sink, so it's not my idea," Nixon reassured us, placing all of the blame on its rightful owner.

"Since the river's the main line of...." Dick's voice faded into oblivion as I suddenly became aware of the soft caresses being lavished on my right hand. Every nerve became acutely aware of the man next to me. His fingertips were tracing a line along my bare palm. Building something within me that knew no bounds and was quickly rising into a crescendo of fiery passion and intense lust.

"Speirs! I'd like to talk to you about who you might want to go along?" I became aware of him leaving me and my fingers tightened around his instinctively. He turned back to me for a moment and gave me a smile that wiped all thought from my mind.

"I'll be back, love," he muttered and moved away from me to go and talk to Dick. When he did, I felt the air leave my lungs and I sucked in a breath to fill the void. I felt weak and out of breath, almost as if I'd just run a mile. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nixon watching me. Our eyes met and he gave me that infamous smirk. He made his way over to me after giving the new Lieutenant hell for graduating from West Point on D-Day.

"Already giving the replacement hell, Nix?" I asked him teasingly. He sent me a swift wink before looking over his shoulder at where my eyes kept drifting.

"So you and Sparky having a good day, then? Not that I imagined you wouldn't," he said, making sure to keep his voice low. I slapped his arm.

"Shut up, Lew! No one asked you to stand there and watch the show."

"Watch what show?" Dick asked as he wandered over to us. I glared at Nixon, daring him to say anything. When he held up his hands, I smiled sweetly at Dick.

"Nothing at all. Lew's just been sticking his nose in other people's business like usual. He can't be happy unless he's in the center of all the drama." Dick chuckled, giving Nixon a clap on the back.

"Well, we've gotta go. Meeting with the good Colonel about the patrol," Dick said with a roll of his icy blue eyes. I smiled and waved them off before turning back around. I gasped in surprise when I noticed that someone was standing right behind me. My hand flew to my hand and my eyes turned up to meet those black eyes that I loved to get lost in.

"Ron," I sighed in relief and let my hand fall between our almost-touching chests. The heat collecting underneath my fingertips was enough to make my heart begin to race. Silent and full of promises, his fingers wrapped around mine and lead me through the hallway to one of the back rooms as indiscreetly as the small room would allow. Still not saying a word, he pushed me into the room and closed the door behind himself. I watched him carefully, trying desperately to figure out what was going on behind those eyes that rarely revealed anything.

When he did speak, it resounded within the room and pounded through me to the very core of my being. Liquid heat shot through me and made my pulse thunder in my ears.

"I've been wanting to get you alone since this morning. Standing beside you in that room just now was absolutely torture," he said, taking a deliberately slow step toward me. An increasing awareness that we really were alone made my throat tighten in anticipation. And I couldn't think of anything coherent to say. I felt like I was on fire as his fingertips danced across my the bare expanse of my hand. I convulsed, simultaneously stepping closer to him and grabbing a fistful of his uniform to keep him tied to me. I looked up at him, sure that I would see the same lust and hunger I'd seen in his eyes before. I wasn't disappointed.

Within a moment, he ducked his head and pressed his lips gently to mine. Fire danced behind my closed eyelids and electricity shot from his skin to mine. I let out a breathless moan and circled my hands around his neck.

I didn't care that we were both caked with dirt. The last few months of waiting for this kiss, this forgiveness, didn't matter. All that we existed for was each other and I was happy to notice that he was holding me as desperately as I was him.

He pulled away hesitantly, sucking in a ragged breath.

"Adie," he groaned, checking his watch suddenly.

"What is it?" I whispered, terrified that our time together was drawing to a close. I didn't want it to end.

"I have to meet Dick in twenty minutes," he said, a tinge of sadness coloring his eyes. The explanation, instead of dampening my spirits, only made me grip him tighter.

"I suppose we should make good use of those twenty minutes then," I giggled lightly when his eyes flared again. After a moment, his lips were on mine again. This time, with none of the timidness of the first kiss. Now, it was full of an acute urgency that I knew both of us could feel. His tongue flickered just shy of my lips. What he was waiting for, I didn't know, but I couldn't stand the anticipation. Feeling bold, I demanded entrance into his mouth instead. I swallowed his moan with relish and took my time taking him in. Tasting him like I never had before.

I hadn't noticed that he was slowly backing us up until my back hit the wall. I gasped slightly and pulled away from him to catch my breath. My chest was heaving, with every breath, hitting his teasingly. He moved to my neck, sucking and biting his way down to the hollow of my throat. My fingers tangled in his hair, holding him there while I struggled to keep my thoughts coherent.

"Ron," I moaned as his hands tantalized my flesh through my uniform. He dragged his fingers lazily down my sides to my hips and back up again. I felt the proof his arousal on my thigh. So close to where I needed him the most. But, before I knew it, he had pulled away from me and was staring deep into my eyes. He cupped my cheek and kissed my lips tenderly.

"I have to go, but I'll be back," he whispered against my sensitive skin. Then, he was gone, the door snapping into place breaking me from my reverie. The desire to follow after him was so great that I sank to the floor to prevent my feet from moving. He left me wanting him more, _needing _him more than I ever had before. The throbbing between my legs matched that of my thundering pulse. Being able to feel him harden against me...It sent chills down my spine and I had to curl my fingers into my palm to keep the cry of agony from ripping through my throat. The pain sobered me and I was able to content myself with his promise that he would come back to finish what he'd started.

**Okay so no proof-reading. I realize that this chapter was a long time coming. And you can all thank Sairahiniel for hinting that she would like this chapter to be posted. **

**I'll thank her too as well as captain ty, who was more than helpful with this chapter. And thank you to all the people who reviewed last chapter. I actually got a lot. I'm sorry that I don't mention you by name, but you know who you are and I am eternally grateful to every one of you. **

**No disrespect is intended towards the real men on whom this story and the series Band of Brothers is based. I own Adelina Jones and that's it. :)**


	30. Chapter 30 Part 1

**I know this is totally ruining it guys, but this story is rated M for a reason. Sexual content is present in this chapter. So, if that's not your cup of tea, you might not want to read. :D And I am in no way trying to disrespect the real men on whom this story is based. **

_Past the point of no return no backward glances _

_Our games of make believe are at an end_

_Past a point of "if" or "when" no use resisting_

_Abandon thought and let the dream descend_

_What raging fire shall flood the soul?_

_What rich desire unlocks its door?_

_What sweet seduction lies before us?_

_~ "Point of No Return" from The Phantom of the Opera movie_

Part One

Speirs' POV

I could sense the incessant ticking of the clock at my wrist. I willed it to stop, for the world to come to a stand-still while we were allowed to move on. But I knew the choice I had to make. Stay her with her and lose myself in an inferno of passion and crazed lust. Or do my duties and hope that she would believe in my promise to return to her.

I leaned away from her, the tendrils of her soft fingers grazing against my chest. It took everything I had not to submit to those hands that promised the fulfillment of my deepest desires. I stared into those two green pools. I was losing myself in them. Drowning in the wake of my love for her. But I knew that I couldn't stay. Eventually, someone would come looking for me. And whatever this unexplained hunger for each other was I wanted the time to explore it thoroughly. I needed the time to explore her and let her do the same.

Feeling the sadness overwhelming me, I kissed her lips tenderly, memorizing the way she tasted and felt against my body.

"I have to go, but I'll be back," I whispered against her cheek. Before I pulled away from her again, I could feel her shudder beneath me. As I turned from her, I heard the slight rustle of her uniform. I willed her not to follow me, because I knew what would happen if she did. I opened the door and closed it. I leaned heavily with my back to the door. That thick slab of wood was the only thing separating me from the one thing I desired most. My entire body was burning-all for her. I could still feel the tremble of her slight frame as she eagerly pressed her body closer to my own. Those heavenly lips. Everywhere all at once. To think of it was maddening and I couldn't help but feel slightly resentful at the fact that I had to walk away from it. I was trapped in the middle of a war zone and had been since D-Day, but that had been the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

"Captain Speirs?" I heard someone call my name from the opening of the narrow hallway. My head shot up and for the first time I noticed that my hand was still resting on the door knob. I could feel the cold metal running through my veins like ice. The opportunity was still there, but it was so far out of reach that I could do nothing but push away from the door and approach whoever was calling my name.

"What?" I demanded of the Private who was standing in front of me. I couldn't help the smirk that curled my lips as I noticed his visibly anxious demeanor. He was as terrified of me as everyone else who'd ever met me. Everyone but Adelina.

_Stop thinking about her! _I berated myself mentally. I had to deal with my duties before I could return to those succulent lips and mesmerizing curves.

"Captain Winters needs to see you, Sir." I sighed heavily and nodded.

"Alright, I'll be there in five minutes," I said, taking a cigarette from my pocket and lighting it. It was going to be a long afternoon.

Adelina's POV

My chest was still heaving with exertion as I stood on trembling legs. His smell-so unmistakably masculine, still filled my nostrils and made my head spin with heady desire. Being surrounded by the remaining dregs of his warmth, I became very conscious of the fact that I hadn't seen a bar of soap in nearly two months. The thought had bile rising in my throat, scorching everything it came in contact with. With difficulty, I swallowed it and decided to go and ask about showers. Undoubtedly, we would all be getting fresh uniforms and showers soon.

Exhilaration passed unchecked through my limbs and I found the strength to put one foot in front of the other and make my way toward the front of the building. I found Luz hastening toward the exit.

"George! Where are you off to in such a hurry?" I asked him, feeling a smile tug at the corners of my lips. He returned the gesture and motioned me over.

"Hey, Adie. Just headed out to go get a shower. You wanna join me?" He wiggled his eyebrows up and down suggestively. My only reply was to smack him on the arm.

"George Luz! You deserve a good kick in the arse for saying such a thing," I said with a playful glare. Luz winked as he put his helmet on.

"Well, no one can say I didn't try, huh? So you still holding out for Sparky then?"

"I think I'll keep that information to myself, thank you," I said, unable to keep the gleam from alighting in my eyes. Every inch of my skin was tingling just from thinking about him being near me again. I closed my eyes, getting lost in those enrapturing sensations, before focusing on Luz's voice.

"Suit yourself. I know there's a shower in the back that you could use. And here's a new uniform for ya. It was the smallest size I could find," he told me with a boyish grin spreading across his face. He pressed the clean clothes into my hands and I couldn't help but lean toward him. I quickly placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Thanks, George. Really, I don't know how you scrounge things up like you do, but I love you for it." I giggled when his cheeks turned red.

"Geez, Adie!" he said and ducked his head in embarrassment, "Leave it to you to make me blush. Thank God none of the guys are here!" For some reason, this just made the situation even more amusing to me. Trying unsuccessfully to hold the laughter inside, I suddenly let out a high-pitched string of giggles that had me bent over and clutching my stomach.

"Now what the hell is funny about that?" Luz asked me, but I could hear the laughter in his voice. And before I knew it, we were both on the floor clutching our stomachs, my pile of clean clothes ignored beside me as we rolled on the floor. I sat up first, my chest heaving and my limbs shaking from laughing so hard for so long. I wiped the tears from my eyes and ran a hand through my now-matted hair.

"I haven't laughed so hard since...I can't even remember. Probably before my sister died," I said, with a sense of wonderment that made me unaware of what I'd been saying. Until Luz suddenly sat up, his eyes growing wide with shock.

"You had a sister? I didn't know that." Feeling saddened by her memory, which I'd unconsciously thrown into my face, I patted his hand affectionately.

"There's a lot that you guys still don't know about me," I told him, the truth of the statement somehow making me feel like running away from everything that had become my life. I realized that if I wanted to stay with Ron, there were things that I would have to share with him that I'd never told anyone else. The thought terrified me but in being honest with him, I knew that it would also bring a sense of freedom in my soul. I wanted that release, needed it like I'd never needed anything in my life. The only question was when would I tell him?

"Adie? You okay?" the sound of someone's voice in my ears was muffled. With difficulty, I pulled myself back to the present and turned a slightly confused stare on Luz.

"I'm fine, George. Just tired I think. Thanks again for the uniform," I said as I gathered the bundle of clothes into my arms and walked away from him.

"You're welcome, kiddo," he called before I heard the sound of a door being closed and shut. I couldn't help the smile that tugged at the corners of my lips. That moment of clarity that I'd experienced before of finally finding people who cared about me returned to me, filling my heart with so much love I had to pause a moment to catch my fleeing breath. Eight months ago, I wouldn't have believed that I would be out of the clutches of the Germans and in the arms of a company of Americans. I never would have believed that I could ever care about them all so much that I would be willing to give up my own life to save theirs.

Shaking my head to clear it, I focused all my attention on finding the bathroom that Luz had mentioned. I found it in the second bedroom down the hallway. I gasped in surprise to see that out of the entire building, the bathroom seemed like it was the only room that had retained any semblance of cleanliness. True a piece of the ceiling had fallen from the roof and chipped the toilet seat. And the mirror above the sink was cracked almost beyond repair. However, the bath tub remained untouched and that was all I could ask for.

Deciding that a scalding hot bath was what I really needed, I started to fill the tub. Soon, steam was rising from the water and I started to take my clothes off. My fingers made quick work of my uniform and I was soon slipping slowly into the tub. The warm water seeped into my bones, relaxing every muscle. Smoothing away all signs of tension and leaving me feeling more relaxed than I had in a while. I sighed happily, hoping that no one came looking for me soon as I dunked my head under the surface.

Two hours and two bathtubs of hot water later, I was clean. I stepped out of the water, the icy chill of the wind hitting me and covering my body in goosebumps. A shudder ran down my spine, but I did nothing to abate the cold. I ran my fingers patiently through my auburn curls, the ends of my strands tickling my collar bone. It was like the phantom of his fingers were ghosting across my skin and I let out a soft whimper that was swallowed by the cold surrounding me. I wondered how many more hours I would have to wait to be in his arms again. Our spines ablaze, our bare skin rubbing together as sweat began to coat our bodies.

I inhaled a shaky breath, making sure to keep my fingers cupped firmly around the sides of the white sink. Otherwise, I would feel that need to touch myself. And I knew that would only make the craving for him worse. Sighing at my own lack of self-will I turned to loop my fingers around the clean white t-shirt that Luz had grabbed me. Feeling bold, threw that on over my head and drew my underwear up my legs. The soft cotton caressed my skin, making me ache for the touch of bare skin on bare skin. Of his calloused hands running softly up and down my pale skin. And as if I could make it a reality, I felt it. Felt _him_, his warmth surrounding me and making my knees shaky. He grabbed my shoulders and turned me around so that I was facing him. His eyes had softened to the color of melted chocolate and I found myself leaning forward in amazement. Judging by his appearance, he had just taken his shower too.

"Back so soon?" I asked him, my voice raising above little more than a whisper. He inched closer, his lips humming above my skin, a fact that excited me almost as much as finally being able to touch him without interruption.

"Yes. I couldn't stay away for very long I'm afraid," he muttered, his voice silky with desire and promises the result of which I could never imagine. My eyes rolled slightly into my head before I was able to focus on him again and press my hips subtly into his. I could feel the proof of his arousal against my inner thigh and I couldn't contain myself. With a wild and passionate burst of elation, I closed the distance between our bodies and kissed him with all that I had. He moaned. In surprise, in ecstasy, in happiness and my hand slid down the front of his uniform toward that point where he needed me most. When my finger tips began to stroke him, he tensed and pulled away from me with a growl. He grabbed my wrist and pushed my back harder against the sink.

"Not yet," he whispered against my neck, his tongue lapping softly at the hollow of my throat before his lips closed over it. I moaned loudly, my free hand twisting itself into his dark locks and pulling him closer. I felt as if I was burning alive. My spine was on fire and everywhere his warmth was consuming me whole. I was left breathless with the intensity of my sudden need for him and I realized that if he forced me to wait any longer, I would die.

"Ron," I said, my fingers tugging at his hair to get his attention, "Ron, please I can't wait. I need you." He pulled away from me, his brown eyes turned almost black with lust. He growled, the sound reverberating through my own chest and making me shudder anew, before grabbing my wrist and leading me toward the door. I could feel the urgency in the way his fingers entwined themselves around me. He threw the door open and glanced hastily down the hall. Deciding that the coast was clear, he lead me further down the hall, choosing the door at the very end to enter. When he pushed me in, I was enraptured by the smell of him that permeated the room. It was a mixture of pine trees and something else. Something undeniably masculine that made me want him all the more.

I stood in the middle of the room, taking in the slight disarray that it was in. His foot locker was open, some of it's contents tossed around the room. I felt a jolt in my stomach when I realized that I had a chance to pick up after him for the rest of my life. If he would have me. And as I felt his warm fingers gently coax my curls to the side so that he could place a tender kiss to the back of my neck, I had no doubts that he wanted me just like I wanted him. He pulled me backwards so that his back was to the door and I was pressed firmly against him. His hands ran down my bare arms and stopped on meeting the bottom of my shirt. His fingers gripped it tightly and he pulled it upwards, moving so slowly that I could hear the seconds ticking inside my head. With a sudden rush, the cool air hit me and I had to lean closer to him, trying to absorb the heat that was rolling in waves off his body. I moaned when his hands gripped my hips and slid up my torso toward my bare chest. His fingers caressed the under side of my breasts and I arched into his touch.

"Oh God, Ron," I gasped softly, his fingers massaging those pearly mounds and eliciting small moans from my lips. My knees were shaking and I didn't know how much longer I would be able to hold myself up. I turned around in his arms and looked him up and down.

"That's not fair. You're wearing entirely too many clothes, Ron," I said, making him smirk.

"We should fix that," he said, leaning forward to kiss my neck. I laughed breathlessly as he sucked and nipped at the hollow in my throat. My fingers made quick work of his jacket and his t-shirt. I ran my hands down his chiseled chest, feeling for a brief moment the pounding of his chest and continued to trace the angles of his abdomen. I could feel his muscles clench and unclench beneath my gentle touch, his lips moving more urgently against my skin in response. I stopped suddenly at the top of his pants, teasing him by running my fingers along that line. I giggled when he let out a half-strangled growl and grabbed my wrists.

In a second, he had me pushed up against the wall and he was pulling off his pants and boots. Breathing heavily, he just stared at me for a second. His eyes drank me in. My messy hair, my swollen lips, the rose-colored petals that were my cheeks, and my own heaving chest. Then, he closed the distance between us, our chests pressed flush against each other. He placed a bruising kiss on my lips, pulling back just enough so that I could still feel the vibrating heat of them near my own.

"Adie, I love you," he said, the truth sparkling in his eyes. Feeling tears well up in my own, I cupped his cheek and whispered, "I love you too, Ron." He smiled, the motion making my heart swell with an unchecked feeling that I'd never known. This must be what it's like. That incapacitating, helpless feeling of being in love with someone so much that you couldn't imagine living your life without them. I didn't know what I would do if he were to walk out of my life now, but I did know that I had to enjoy him while I had him.

That urgency and renewed passion had me bending over slightly so that I could slide my underwear from my body. Ron did the same and then straightened to meet me in a blindingly passionate kiss. It was the embodiment of our love, of our aching need for each other, of that undeniable force that kept pushing us together. I moaned when I felt him hovering at my entrance. Wrapping my legs around his waist at the same time as he plunged inside of me, I could feel my head reeling with the slightly animalistic hunger in our movements.

Every second that passed by, we drew closer to that point poised before the brink of ecstasy. The embers of passion that were lying dormant in our minds suddenly drew forth in a whirlwind of fiery lust that threatened to consume us entirely. We were past the point of no return. There was no going back, no chance of turning our backs on what was sure to be the end of us both. But I couldn't care enough to stop. Not now when we were both so close.

"Adie," Ron said as I felt my walls tightening for the final time. His head fell on my shoulder and I could feel the scream building in my throat. I let it burst past the walls of my lips as I came around him. I felt him following me and knew that I wouldn't trade this moment for anything in the world. I gripped his shoulders tightly as we both came down from our high.

"That was..." Ron's voice trailed off in amazement as he gazed into my eyes. In a rare show of tenderness, he leaned forward and brushed his lips against mine. It felt like a butterfly's wings were caressing my lips and it made my heart jump into my throat. Rendering me speechless, all I could do was lay my head into his neck, my hands entangling themselves around him.

"I know," I whispered. He nodded against me and walked slowly over to his bed. He laid us down, pinning me to the bed. With both of his hands on either side of my head, he kissed me, pulling out of me as gently as he could. I whimpered at the lack of warmth I felt and grabbed his arm to keep him with me.

"Don't leave me," I begged him, knowing that it was probably useless. He smirked, that familiar glint appearing in his dark brown eyes.

"You're not sick of me yet?" he asked playfully, but I could see the doubt in his expression. I giggled.

"Of course not." He grabbed my hand and kissed my palm.

"I'll be right back. Don't move," he told me and moved across the room to his clothes. He threw on his jacket and his pants and moved silently from the room. I sighed in contentment and leaned back into the pillows. I turned my head slightly to press my nose to them. They smelled like him and I couldn't help but flip over on my stomach and wrap my arms around it. When I did, my fingertips brushed lightly across something beneath it. My eyebrows furrowing, I grabbed it and pulled it out. It was a letter. I could see that it was worn. Ron had obviously read it several times. I made to put the letter back under his pillow before I saw something written on it that grabbed my attention.

_Ron, _

_I'm not sure if you really care, but I thought that I should tell you that the baby is doing fine. I'm nearly seven months along now. I've already picked out names. Allison if it's a girl and Johnathon if it's a boy..._

My eyes roved over the letter, finding Maria's name signed at the bottom. The words were blurring together and my hand dropped helplessly to my lap. The letter floated forgotten to the bed sheets and settled there by my side, seeming to mock me in every whisper about the silent room.

I could feel my eyes welling up with un-shed tears. Maria was pregnant and he hadn't told me. I wondered how long he was going to keep that secret from me. In the same moment, I could feel my heart breaking into a thousand shards and poking me in the chest. With a strangled sob, I wrapped my arms around my knees and wept for all that I knew I would lose. Being with him when the only one standing in our way was a woman whom I could tell did not love Ron at all and was only with him for convenience. But a child was different. I would not ask him to abandon an unborn child for me. I couldn't condemn someone that hadn't even seen the beauty and joy in the world to a broken home just to please myself.

I heard the door open and my face moved upwards so fast that I was sure my neck would snap. I stared at him, the tears still leaking from my eyes and he stared back, the shock of finding me like this evident on his face.

"Adie, what's wrong? What happe-," he began concernedly until he noticed the discarded letter beside me. His expression grew cold and I saw the mask sliding back into place.

"You read it," he stated, his voice devoid of all feeling. I wiped my eyes, nodding all the while. I couldn't bring myself to be furious with him. Not yet. All I could feel now was sorrow and heartache that he hadn't told me and with the knowledge that we could not see each other anymore under any circumstances.

"Why didn't you t-tell me?" I asked, my unchecked emotion making my lips quiver helplessly. I could see his black eyes soften for a moment but then the shell was put back into place.

"Why do you feel the need to look through my things? Do you have so little trust in me?" he asked me.

"Nothing's changed. I do trust you even after all the things you've done to me to prove that I shouldn't. I wasn't reading it to snoop, I was putting it back under your pillow when I saw that Maria was talking about a baby.

"I can't do this anymore. I won't let an unborn child suffer because I want to be with you. Please don't try and change my mind, Ron. I love you so much, but I can't do this. I'm sorry," I said. With a final sigh, I jumped from the bed and dressed myself as quickly as I could, feeling the tears running red-hot down my cheeks. I grabbed the door handle and gently pulled it open so that I could leave. I looked back one last time to see his face fall into his hands. I bit my lip, fighting the impulse to run back to him. Instead, I closed the door behind me and walked away from him. As I walked down the hallway, I knew that I had never felt so alone and dead inside than I did then.

Speirs' POV

I could see the tears running down her face as she fled the room. I could feel my heart being shredded to pieces with every droplet that fell from her eyes. I knew that I had to do something or I would lose her forever. But I couldn't. I was frozen to the spot, my very soul trembling with the consequences of what I had done.

I had lied to her again. I couldn't say why I did it. I couldn't say why I continued to hurt her the way I did. A thousand reasons drifted through my mind.

_Maybe you were scared that telling her would scare her away forever. _That didn't make sense at all. She was leaving now anyway, so telling her wouldn't have changed her mind.

_Maybe you were hoping that by not telling her, by ignoring the facts of your miserable life, you could somehow correct the wrong. You were hoping that Maria being pregnant was just a nightmare. _

My face dropped into my hand as I realized that was exactly the problem. I'd hoped with every inch of my being that I would wake up from my nightmares to find that Maria wasn't pregnant and that I would be able to have Adie for the rest of my life. But that wasn't going to happen, not now, not ever.

**Yes this chapter is ridiculously short. However, I wanted to get this out to you guys with an explanation. This chapter is a two part event. Yeah, sounds pretty epic right? So it's almost like two chapters, but it would really include all of this information. I know it's a lot to digest and I know that this had to happen sooner or later, but I wanted this one to be just right. And as I've told Captain Ty, I think that splitting this really large chapter into two parts was probably the best choice. So, I'll give you guys a few days to digest it. Then, I'll post Part Two on most likely Tuesday or Wednesday. Really quick updates I know, but I didn't want to leave too much of a gap between the two parts so there we go. Oh yeah! Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. I'm so sorry that I can't mention all of you by name. But I love you all besides! :)**


	31. Chapter 30 Part 2

_Wishing I could find a way to wash away the past_

_Knowing that my heart_

_Will break, but at least the pain will last_

_I die each time you look away_

_My heart, my life will never be the same_

_This love will take my everything_

_One breath, one touch will be the end of me_

_~ "Love Song Requiem" by Trading Yesterday_

Part Two

Adelina's POV

I focused on placing one foot in front of the other. It was the only way that I would be able to cope with this.

_Ron lied to me. He betrayed my trust again and had the nerve to get angry with me. _And as much as he'd hurt me, I couldn't bring myself to let the fury seep into every open and jagged wound lining my skin. All I could feel was sorrow at the fact that we couldn't be together. The thought of subjecting an innocent child, _his _child, to a life full of misery was unthinkable. I knew then that I had crossed a line that should have always been between us. I'd learned to love and forgive him his mistake of not telling me that he was married. I had chosen the forbidden path. I had sealed my fate before the consequences of my actions had even touched the back of my mind. And I had doomed myself to a life full of hopeless despair in whispering into the tendrils of darkness that I loved him. Filled with passion, I'd lead myself to believe that everything between us would be alright if we could admit that we were in love.

But real life wasn't like the movies or the books. In real life, love does not conquer all. Or at least not in our case. Our love was ruining us both and the letter had just driven a stake into what was left of my heart. It felt like there was nothing left to hurt. And yet my entire body was throbbing with need. The raw impulse to turn around and run back into his arms. The only thing keeping me from doing so was the possibility of something far less painful on the horizon. I would do anything to keep my head from wrapping continuously around Ron and I knew the one person who could help me.

"Dick?" I called through the thick slab of wood that I was knocking softly on at the same time.

"Come in," he replied, his voice tired and worn. My fingers closed around the handle of his door and for a moment, I reconsidered putting him in this position. But my own selfishness was what made me continue into his room. I couldn't stay away now. Staying on my own with nothing to think of but mistake after mistake would be unbearable.

"Hey, Adie. Long time no see," he grinned at me from over the top of his typewriter. The look in my eyes had him doing a double-take.

"Are you alright?" he asked in that quiet voice of his. He stood up from his seat and crossed the room to be closer to me. His fingers ghosted across my cheeks and held my head in place while his icy blue eyes roved over me. He traced the stains of my dry tears and understanding flooded his eyes.

Wrapping his arms around me, my face was pushed into his neck. I could feel the start of a sob forming in my stomach and tried to let his warmth fill me to stop it.

"Oh, Adie, why do you keep doing this to yourself?" he whispered against my curls. I knew the things that were left unsaid between us.

_I would never let this happen to you. I would never ever hurt you like he has. Please come back to me. _

And I wanted so badly to run to that voice. To let him take me as his and wipe all the memories of Ron from my mind. I wanted to feel that release, _needed _ to feel that release. But I knew that running into Dick's arms would not really make me forget Ron. Nothing would ever truly make him disappear completely from my thoughts and Dick deserved so much better than that. He deserved better than me.

So, I swallowed the sobs and the tears and pulled away from him.

"Dick, I need to go on that patrol," I told him, not offering him any other reason for why I needed this. Looking into his eyes, I found that he didn't need any more explanation.

"Are you sure?" I nodded, feeling my heart swell with comfort in the fact that he was not going to deny me my request.

"I've never been so sure of anything in my life, Dick. Besides, they might need a medic on that patrol. And I know the other medics are worn out from what we've been through with Bastogne."

"Alright. Why don't you sleep here until the time comes? You look awful," he told me, the sadness back in his eyes.

"Will you stay with me?"

"I'll be at the desk," he said. I could see the hesitancy, the questioning in his eyes. And I chose not to ask him to hold me, knowing that I had to put distance between us before I did something irreparable to our friendship. I nodded and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you, Dick. For everything," I muttered softly. Dick nodded and pulled away from me. I closed my eyes, wishing with all my might that things could be different. Wishing that I hadn't let Ron worm his way so far into my heart.

***

"Okay guys. Time to saddle up. Adie, you'll be in the first boat with me. Let's go," Martin whispered to the group as quickly as he could. The thrill of moving again had my heart racing wildly with an adrenaline rush. I felt like I was on a natural high. A blessing that I wouldn't have believed was possible. Martin was the first into the boat and grabbed my hand so that I could step down after him. He winked at me and then turned around again to help the other three members of our boat.

The procession across the water was quick and easy. Almost too easy I thought before I heard the splash of a boat flipping over.

"I can't swim!" I heard Sisk shout. I closed my eyes for a second, willing him to be quiet. If we weren't careful, we'd be found out before we'd even crossed the river.

"Alright, focus guys and gal," Martin muttered to the now-worried entourage. I watched the mist swirl and twist above the surface of the water. For a moment, I became mesmerized by the patterns that were forming. Then, my back was pushed by the man behind me as the bottom of the boat hit land. I breathed a sigh of relief and hopped out after Martin as fast as I could. The crunch of the snow underneath my boots had me wincing slightly. Martin jerked his head at me to move and I backed away a few feet. My heart was pounding loud, fast, and strong within my breast. My throat had clogged with worry. A chill ran down my spine and the sound of an owl hooting. One of the guys clapped me softly on the arm as he passed. I recognized him as Grant and I fell into step beside him.

"You okay?" he asked, his voice so soft that I almost believed I'd imagined him saying anything at all.

"I'm fine. I've got sixteen strong men to take care of me," I smiled. Grant grasped my hand for a moment before dropping to the ground. I followed suit and we waited our turn to move forward along with the rest of the men. Private Vest and Lieutenant Jones were in front of us. As soon as Martin gave us the all clear, we both jumped into a crouching position and ran forward after the others. We found

a pile of rubble to crouch behind. Grant put his body slightly in front of me. I could feel the protectiveness in his body stance and had to grasp my medical bag between my fingers to stop from touching him. I could feel my eyes flood with tears as I thanked God once again for placing such wonderful, caring men all around me.

"Powers, McClung-go!" Martin tapped both of them on the shoulder. They moved quietly, making sure to avoid anything that would make their presence known. With a quick nod as he saw them take their positions behind a log pile, he followed after them. Leaning with his back against the logs, he motioned for us to move up in twos. Grant and I went first. He made sure to keep even with me and let me go first around a fence on our way to Shifty and McClung.

My heart was pounding frantically within my breast, the sound resounding so loudly in my own ears that I was surprised no one else could hear it. I could feel the fear permeating my body and wondered suddenly if I shouldn't have just stayed behind after all. The pain I felt about Ron would be nothing compared to the risk of being killed when we were so close to being sent back home to our families.

"Adie, follow me. Stay on my ass," Martin said, tapping me on the shoulder as he turned around to lead the group towards the house we were supposed to going to. I nodded quickly, the movement shaking some feeling back into my limbs. My legs pounded painfully beneath me as I crouched as low as I could to the ground. I could hear the slight rustling of the other guys as they moved around me and through me. I could feel all of our hearts beating in tandem as we set our sights on one goal, one purpose, a single objective. We had to infiltrate that building and take all prisoners alive for questioning. We'd done far worse, far more challenging things in the past. This should have been a piece of cake.

As quickly and quietly as we could, we scaled the left side of the building. Turning the corner was the scariest part and I felt the unease roll of my body in a languid whisper of a sigh. Martin and I crouched down, waiting for the others. Our breath mingling and providing some sense of normality and stability to the situation. Breathing was the only thing we could do to keep calm under pressure. I breathed a slight sigh of relief when the men formed a line behind us, looking expectantly at Martin for instructions on what to do next.

I closed my eyes for a moment, knowing that this was it. The deep breath before the opening of a dark abyss. The terror flooded my veins, incapacitating me temporarily. What if these were the last minutes of my life? What if I was to die on this mission? I wondered how many people would morn my death and I felt my pulse subside into a quiet echo of the warmth and love that permeated through my body. I had found what I had been looking for. A home, a family, people to love and people who loved me back. I had found my place in the world and I knew that nothing could ever take that away from me. As long as I had that, I knew I could face anything. I felt in that second that I could take on the entire German army without getting myself hurt.

However, my optimism did not last long. Martin was tapping me on the shoulder, motioning for me to follow after Jackson up the stairs. I took a deep breath, my chest rising and falling for what could be the last time. Then, I stood up, everything seeming to travel in slow motion. I felt the rise and fall of my legs against the cold, hard cement. I sensed the future premonition of a single mistake that would affect the lives of the two people currently running up the stairs. I rushed forward, the glint of Jackson's grenade flashing before me until it disappeared into the black depths of the room we were about to enter. Listening for the deafening explosion, I realized too late what was about to happen.

"Jackson, no!" I screamed, my voice reverberating in my ears for a fraction of a second. I realized then what the stars had been trying to tell me. This night would be the end of everything that I once knew. I plunged forward, trying desperately to change our futures. To prevent what I could not control. Jackson's foot crossed the threshold and I threw my entire soul into pulling him back. But he was too fast. My fingers closed around empty air and swung forward again.

The explosion hit me, surprised me, terrified me. The numerous shards of metal and wood impacted against my body. I fell to my knees, letting out a strangled cry of pain. The sounds of the others fluttered against my semi-conscious mind for a moment before I finally closed my eyes to the pain.

It was at that moment that I anticipated my life flashing before me. However, it never happened. All I could see, hear, feel was Ron. And then, blackness consumed me, her smoky fingers closing around my hand and pulling me into a sea of blank bliss.

Speirs' POV

"CAPTAIN SPEIRS!" The shout startled me from my quiet reprieve. I jumped at the sound, my heart pounding very hard and fast in my chest. I crossed the room in three strides and ripped the door open. I tried to muster enough anger for the man to drive him away from my quarters forever. However, the sickening color of his face told me that something was very very wrong.

"What's happened?" I asked, a cold dread sweeping suddenly through my insides.

"It's Adelina, sir. She's hurt. Sergeant Martin asked me to come find you." All it took to move me were the words Adelina and hurt. I bolted through the door, my legs moving faster than they ever had in my life. I could feel the adrenaline and seizing terror circulating in my veins. I used that sudden burst of energy to push myself toward the aid station. I could hear the worried voices before I'd come close to the door. They rose in a clamor, some louder than others, some full of unshed tears as they tried desperately to save her life. My eyes filled unexpectedly at the thought of her dying. It was like we were in the woods at Bastogne again. The gun was pressed to her temple and I was completely at a loss to save her life a second time. I could feel my heart being torn to shreds and I knew that those long runs up Currahee hadn't been for nothing. It seemed like my entire life, my entire existence, my whole being was bent on getting to her. In some way, I wanted to believe that just getting to her would be good enough. That I would be good enough to deserve her even though I'd hurt her beyond repair. Even though I was the cause of her pain and suffering.

I could feel the atmosphere around me changing. I could smell the blood and death in the air. I could hear her sharp gasps of pain as if she was right next to me. My heart gave a painful lurch and I knew that in failing to save her, I would end my life. For the second time in a very short time, I could feel the weight of everything that had happened to us in the last eight months fall down on my shoulders. Without her, nothing was worth anything. And I knew now that this would be the turning point. This was real and I knew that if she left me, I would be alone. Completely and utterly in the world. It was the most terrifying feeling in the world.

I was even closer now and my hands, gasping the air in a wild torrent of need, met the cold metal of the door handle. As my fingers tightened around the handle, my shoulder was grabbed from behind. The owner of that hand threw me backwards. With a primal growl that rumbled through my soul, my fingers slid quickly down my abdomen and closed around the cold handle of my pistol. Whipping it out and pointing it at my attacker, I looked at them in surprise.

"Dick?!"

"What the hell did you do to her?!" he asked me, his voice little more than the calmest whisper. But he didn't sound or look calm by any stretch of the imagination. His eyes were alight with something, a smoldering fire that made him look like he was burning alive. We stood there, my pistol still pointed at his face, man to man in the silence-cloaked night. It was then that I realized what I'd been trying to deny all along. If I let her go, then there would be someone else, someone much more deserving than me waiting in the wings. Dick Winters was that someone. Shaking my head to clear it of the onslaught of doubt and fear that plagued my mind, I stepped toward the door only to have him yank my shoulder back again.

"If you think you're going in there, you're out of your mind." I didn't need time to think of a reply.

"And you're out of yours if you think I won't," I snarled, my upper lip curving into a half-smirk. I was daring him to stop me. And when his hand slipped off my arm, I knew that for now, I had won.

I rushed through the doors, my eyes taking in the sight of her shaking body. The blood was pooling along the stretcher they had her on. Two men were moving to opposite ends of the stretcher, their hands poised over it. Waiting to take her away from me. All at once, my emotions overcame everything and with a wild cry of rage, I lurched forward and pulled her into my arms.

"You aren't taking her away from me," I stated, my voice so venomous and deadly that the men around me took a step backwards. Their eyes were widening by the second, but I knew they would not try and take her away again. I placed a tender kiss on her clammy forehead. She whimpered, the sound of my name tickling my ear. I smiled briefly, the tears shining once again in my eyes. I swept a lock of her hair from her face, peering into her half-open eyes with concern.

"It's alright, baby. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere," I muttered against her hair. I could feel the wet blood that was matted in her hair. It was sticking to my cheek, to my fingers, to my uniform. Around me, I could hear the mutterings. The dark whispers that threatened to be my undoing. But I couldn't make myself care at all. Nothing could pull me from focusing on the gentle rise and fall of her chest against mine.

"Ron!" I heard someone shout my name above me. Dick had a hold of my shoulder again. As my eyes turned to him, I saw that the room had cleared of everyone but the three of us.

"Ron, I won't tell you again. We need to move her. If we don't she'll die," he told me, his tone almost pleading in its desperation for my acquiescence.

"No, I won't let you take her away. She doesn't deserve to die surrounded by strangers. And maybe just maybe she'll have a better chance of surviving if she stays with me. And if it doesn't work, I don't care what you do to me. Line me up against a wall and shoot me for all I care. But I'm not letting her go goddammit!" I shouted, sending Dick into a lapse of silence. The anger in his expression was almost enough to even make me scared.

"Fine, but after this, don't think you'll be allowed any where near her. You don't get to look at her. You don't get to speak to her. You don't even deserve to think about her. This is twice now that she's seen the face of death because of you. So when she wakes up from this, which I have no doubt that she will because she's one of the strongest people I know, I want you to stay as far away from her as you possibly can." With that, he swept from the room. Leaving a sea of unease in his wake. My blood seemed to curdle in my veins as I thought about what he'd said. I'd screwed up beyond all repair and now, there was no turning back. The better man was winning and it was killing me to know that it wasn't me. I bent over her, my lips humming a promise across his forehead. I grasped her sweet, angelic face between my hands.

"Adie, please. Please don't leave me. I love you so much. I can't live without you. I can't continue in this world knowing that you aren't a part of it," I whispered in her ear. I could feel the words echo through the room and fill me up, the dregs of my heart snapping together once again. I knew what I was saying was the truth. I finally knew what it was to feel like I was losing her and I hated it. Burning hatred scalded my insides and made me want to rip my insides out.

I did this to her. I'd forced her into doing something that she should never have done. In running away from me, she had run to her own death. And I was desperate to pull her away from the darkness. To erase all the horrible, selfish, pig-headed things I had ever done to her was impossible, but if I could spend the rest of my life making it up to her I would. I wanted and needed the chance to make things right between us like I'd never wanted or needed anything in my entire life.

My heart fell as Dick's words replayed in my head over and over again.

"_I want you to stay as far away from her as you possibly can..." _I could feel her pulse slowing down.

"Adelina, please, I need you to stay with me."

"_You don't even deserve to think about her." _Before I knew what I was doing, I bent my neck toward her. My lips danced against hers-cold and unresponsive-before I pulled back with tears in my eyes.

"If you die, Adie, everything about me will be lost. I can't live without you and I don't want to. I'd do anything to keep you alive. And I promise that if you can do this for me, I will be better for you. I will work to deserve you. Without you my life is meaningless," I whispered in her ear, pulling back enough to look into her open green eyes. I looked down on her and smiled, pulling her body closer to mine.

Softly, her fingers brushed my hair from my eyes. Her lips twisted into a small, simple smile. The one that only she could give me and cause my heart to fill with joy.

"Ron?" she muttered, her warm breath filling me with hope, making it harder to breathe. My heart leapt into my throat and I had to clear it so that I could speak.

Gripping her face firmly between my hands, "Don't you ever do that to me again! I thought I'd lost you baby." Tears crept into her eyes and she laid a hand gently over mine.

"I'm sorry, Ron. I didn't mean...I never wanted to hurt you," she whispered, her breath waving against my face like a warm summer breeze. I gripped her harder, resisting the urge to pull her to my chest and never let her go.

"I love you," she whispered before letting out a heavy sigh and falling back to sleep.

"I love you too, Adie."

I don't know how long I stayed there, gently caressing her hand. Hoping that with the break of dawn, she would still be there. Warm and comforting beneath my fingertips. I could feel the love and strength flowing from her fingers to mine. I was latched onto those feelings, drinking them up with a voracity I could not have imagined in myself.

This was what I had been searching for my entire life. This was what I, unknowingly, had been waiting for. And all too quickly, she was being ripped from me again. But what could I do as Dick's strong fingers tightened around my shoulder?

Adelina's POV

I was floating somewhere on the edge of consciousness. In some strange ways, I was sleeping and yet I was completely aware of everything that was happening around me.

"_Who are you to decide who she gets to see anyway, Winters?"_

"_I won't stand for you hurting her anymore, Ron. She deserves better."_

"_And you think you're the one to pick up the pieces of her heart then? I think she should be able to decide for herself."_

"_I couldn't agree more. But I don't think that you dragging her to bed is the answer to anything, Speirs. I'm tired of her running to me crying every time you break her, dammit! You need to realize that she isn't some doll that you control."_

"_I think I could say the same to you, Dick. You can't keep her away from me if that's what she really wants..." _The voices faded into the distance and I blinked my eyes open, startled. The dim silhouette of a man swam into view and I grasped their hand, my heart falling into my stomach. I could feel the last dregs of morphine flowing through my system. My head swam slightly and I gripped his fingers more tightly in my own in response.

I smiled weakly, all the sadness and hurt that I'd been feeling for Ron seeming to vanish as my skin brushed against his. All that mattered was that he was here with me.

"I thought you'd lost me," I whispered into the darkened room. Through the hazy distance between us, I could see him smile at me. His fingertips danced along my cheek, my eyes dropping closed in response.

A small whimper fell from my lips and I could feel the sudden concern buzzing in the air from his body. My free hand clasped against his that was still on my face. I pressed the calloused palm to my lips and laid a light kiss on his skin. The kiss spread in the air like a poison. Only it wasn't that at all. It held the promise of forgiveness, of acceptance. For now anyway. I could not be alone tonight in this strange bed without him. I could shut my mind to the fact that he'd lied to me once again if only for one night. In the morning, I would have to answer for my easy denial. But not now. I pulled back from him just long enough to look up at his darkened countenance.

"Will you hold me? Just for tonight? I-I need you," I muttered against him.

"Of course I will, Adie."

**So, is it really Ron there with her? I know this has been a long time coming. But hey you guys get two updates in one week. So consider yourselves more than lucky lol. **

**Please review if you have the time. Thank you to everyone who's been reading and reviewing. You really have made this week a lot easier. You've been so patient with me and I really really appreciate it. And as of right now, chapter 31 is complete. I seriously finished it up not five minutes ago. So judging by the way that my muse has been acting lately, that one should be out sometime next week. I'm going to predict probably Wednesday or Thursday. But I can't make any promises. **

**Alright, happy reading guys! Love you all. :D**


	32. Chapter 31

Adelina's POV

The sun's rays filtered through the dusty window and lit upon my face. At once, my fear crept up on me when I noticed that a pair of strong arms were curled around my small frame. But I knew from experience that it was not _him _pressed against my back.

It was only Dick. Smiling to myself at my immediate relief, I flipped over to face him. I giggled breathlessly when I discovered that his bright blue eyes were already open, twinkling in the sunlight. I tried to cover up the feelings of confusion and unease I could feel coursing through my veins by the action, hoping against hope that it was working. Why wasn't Ron waiting here for me to awake? How had I so blindly expected the man from last night to have been _him_?

"Good morning," I whispered, my fingers curling themselves into the front of his uniform, "So you were my Knight in Shining Armor last night then?" I'd said it to break the tension suddenly unfurling like a vast hurricane between the two of us. But all it did was made things worse. Instead of a smile, Dick frowned. Slowly, understanding crept into his eyes and he jumped out of bed. He ran an enraged hand through his already messy red hair.

"You didn't know it was me last night?" I couldn't know why he was so angry all of a sudden. The only other time I had ever seen him like this was in Carentan. I closed my eyes briefly, remembering other parts of that day. The way _he _had pulled me from myself. The way _his _arms had wrapped around me, holding me as tightly to his chest as our bodies would allow.

"No, I didn't. How could I have known? It was dark in here."

"You thought it was Ron didn't you? Are you really that quick to forgive him, Adie? My God, the man's lied to you more times than I count. And every time you go back to him." Dick spitting out his name was almost too much to bear. The sound of it brought stinging tears to my eyes. It felt like he was driving a knife through my heart.

"You make me sound like the worst person in the world, Dick. I am an awful person, aren't I?" I choked out, my throat tightening painfully with every syllable, "He's all wrong for me, but I run back to him every chance I get. I don't know what's wrong with me." I glanced up at Dick to see his expression contorted with uncertainty, concern, and the lingering effects of his fury. He took a hesitant step toward me and clasped my hand.

"Adie, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that to you," he said, his voice almost too low for me to hear. I sobbed harder, causing him to wrap his arms around me. I pressed my face to his jacket, breathing him in, hoping that the pain would go away. It didn't. I pushed him away suddenly, bile rose in my throat.

"Dick, please go away. I don't deserve you being nice to me," I sobbed, the tears pouring like molten fire down my cheeks. I wrapped my arms around my abdomen in an effort to hold myself together. And then all at once, I was back in his arms. The blazing heat surrounding him burned through me and melted my shaky resolve. He grabbed my chin and forced me to look him in the eyes. With a tenderness that I still did not imagine I had ever deserved, he brushed the hair from my eyes. I could see the love shining in his glacial pools.

"Adie, please don't push me away. I know that you've been through a lot lately, but I just want you to know that I'm here for you." I could hear the implied meaning to that simple reassurance.

_Even if he isn't._

I could feel it, hear it, taste it all around me. It filled me with a profound emptiness that I hadn't felt since I'd been told that my family had been killed in a car accident. Questions began to spin through my mind. Why hadn't he come to see me? Why wasn't he there to make sure I was alright? So many whys and no answers for those questions that were burning holes in my stomach. At least not the answers that I wanted.

We had pushed each other too far and now I knew there really was no going back. And one thing was gnawing at me now. I had my own lie to share with him. I'd never told him about my time with the Germans. The thought of finally revealing to him my deepest, darkest secret was unbearable, but I knew that it had to be done. After him lying to me, I couldn't keep something so important from him. But I could only tell him if I could ever get him alone.

***

_Sturzelberg, Germany, 1945_

The last month had been hard. The most difficult of the war so far. He hadn't come to see me at all. And the only reprieve I found from the heart wrenching loneliness were the secret glances I caught of him throughout the days. Those same days that seemed to bleed together, tormenting me with the achingly slow passing of time. How many nights had I lain awake waiting, praying, for his arms to close around me? How many times had I hesitated in going to him because I'd believed that what awaited me was so much more painful than sitting here thinking on the past?

So I sat with baited breath, day after day. Wanting something that was never to be. He had a baby to worry about now and a wife. The jealousy and hurt coursed through my veins as I thought about her carrying his child. But hadn't I wanted this for him? Were my urgings finally coming true? I shut my eyes to the world,, feeling the weight of my horror falling heavily onto my shoulders. The watery blackness behind my eyelids was broken by a quiet, gentle voice calling my name.

"Adelina, are you okay?" I opened my eyes and saw the worry etched into Gene's face I looked around me, noticing for the first time that I was in the aid station supply closet.

"I'm in the supply closet," I said, glancing up at Gene again. I could see that for a moment, he didn't really know what to think. Then, slowly the petals of mirth unfurled in his eyes and lips. The laughter that fell on my ears soon filled me. I held my abdomen, the ridiculousness of the scene making me laugh even harder. It had been so long since I'd laughed like that and it felt good. A wide grin still on my face, I stood up and pushed Gene from the room.

"To answer your question, I'm fine," I told him, feeling a giggle bubble up my throat. I saw the ghost of a smile play across his features before that desolate concern fell on his expression. His long fingers closed around my cheek. I closed my eyes, relishing in his soft touch. I recalled those long nights in Bastogne when all we could do to keep ourselves warm was to wrap our arms around each other. A smile crept onto my features until I remembered myself and opened my eyes again. As the folds of my eyelids peeled away from my green orbs, I could feel a swirl of misery surround me. The weight of it threatened to crush me.

"Adie, are you sure you're alright. You've been...out of it for the past month. Ever since we left Hagenau," Roe muttered, his breath fanning against my cheeks. He grabbed my hand and pulled me closer.

"Gene, let me go," I said, my voice shaking slightly.

"No," he replied. My fingers tightened around his jacket, my expression pleading.

"Gene, please. I can't do this right now," I whispered, tears filling my eyes. For a moment, he stared into my eyes. Into my very soul, looking for someway to break me from my despair. But only one man could dissipate my gloom and he was out of reach now. I shuddered as he let me go, already trying desperately to fill the void of my heart with something. Anything.

I needed to feel alive again. I realized for the past month that my life had been nothing but a fog. And I realized that today, something in me had broken to the surface. I wanted the pain, needed the pain. I knew it was the only way I would ever get through this. It was the only way for me to live the rest of my life without him. With the pain, there was that assurance. The knowledge that what had happened between us was real and hadn't all been a dream. I had to hold onto that. If not, I would be driven mad by thoughts of what might have been.

"I'm taking the day off, Gene. I'll be in my room if you need me, alright?" I couldn't wait for him to say anything else. I raced out of the aid station, my legs moving faster and faster beneath me with every step I took. The exhilaration was profound. My heart raced and my blood began to boil. My muscles screamed for relief. And the tears fled from my eyes, blurring my vision. Making it impossible to see where I was going.

Very suddenly, I hit something very solid and very warm.

"Adie?!" I thrashed, my hands coming up to push him away. Long fingers wrapped around both of my wrists. Something in the way that he was holding me struck a chord. My body convulsed on instinct in an effort to get away from the ghosts I could feel closing around me.

"Let me go," I murmured. I closed my eyes to my horrors, praying that soon it would end.

"Adelina, stop it!" I knew that voice. It sent chills down my spine and caused the liquid heat to coil in my stomach. I gasped softly, my body already responding eagerly to the touch of the man that I missed so much. I relaxed in his arms, my heart plummeting into my abdomen.

"Ron. Oh God," I cried, hanging onto him desperately, "Don't let me go." I was in near hysterics. My eyes were darting every which way and I could only guess what he thought of me in that moment. His hands traveled from my wrists to my cheeks. He held my face gently in his palms. I had no choice but to look at him. And it wasn't long before I got lost in his chocolate brown eyes.

"I've missed you," I whispered, not thinking clearly about what was coming out of my mouth. His eyes softened and I could see the restraint in his expression. And as much as I wanted him to close the distance between us, I knew that he couldn't. I understood that we couldn't be together anymore. Not when _she _was the mother of his child.

"I..." His voice trailed away, making me close my eyes to a new round of tears. I shook my head, his hands moving with me.

"Ron, it's okay-," I began to say, but he ran his thumb along my bottom lip, effectively silencing me.

"Shut up for a minute so I can get this out," he said, his voice sharp and demanding. I blinked in surprise, but kept my mouth shut. I knew he hadn't said it to hurt my feelings. His fingers tightened on my cheeks and he took a single deep breath. He closed his eyes for a moment before looking back at me. In those two points of brown light, I could see all the love and yearning he felt for me. It broke my heart, knowing that he was suffering just as much as I was, maybe even more.

"I've missed you too, Adie. I'm sorry I wasn't there when you woke up," he told me. I nodded, a small smile creeping onto my face. I knew that this wasn't enough to completely fix me, but it would be a brief reprieve from my misery. I leaned forward, my lips brushing lightly against his cheek. Every cell in my body was aware of the way his arms suddenly strained around my waist. And just as quickly, our distraction in each other was shattered.

"Speirs!" I heard someone call his name. It took me a moment but finally I figured out that it was Dick. Ron pulled away from me so fast that I could feel my head spinning. But I hadn't missed the look on his face. Fury and resentment. And his stance when Dick leaned close to him was defensive. He was poised for a fight. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as I watched their tense exchange. Then, he was gone. Leaving me alone with Dick for the first time since Hagenau. He came over to me, his fingers grasping my own in a comforting gesture.

"Adie, you okay?" Not wanting him to worry about me anymore than he had to, I did the only thing I could. I lied. Plastering a smile on my face, I nodded.

"Of course," I told him. My curiosity begged to be addressed and before I knew it I was opening my mouth again, "So what was that about?" Dick looked away from me, his lips thinning.

"Oh. Well, I was just talking to Ron about the possibility of transferring you to Battalion."

"What? Why? I'm fine where I am," I said, a tidal wave of chaos threatening to crash over me. Pulling me under with its constant motion. I struggled to remain afloat. I could feel the panic seeping into my eyes. Nothing I could do could stop it.

"Adie. I realize that you want to stay with the men. But I worry about you. And I could keep a much better eye on you if you were there instead of with Easy." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I'd been with Easy all this time. And I'd been doing just fine. Well, except for the hours of staring into space, wishing that I had died that night because it would have been so much easier. But I didn't feel the need to mention that to Dick. If I did, he'd make it a point to pull me out of Easy straight away.

"Dick, I've been fine. It's been a while since I got hurt." Disbelief and anger overcame his features.

"Hurt?!" he repeated, his tone incredulous, "Adie, you nearly died. Do you understand that? You almost died." He whispered the last part, his lips quivering slightly as he tightened his hold on my hand.

"But I didn't, Dick. That's the point. I made the choice and you transferring me to Battalion...all I'll be is a hindrance." He shook his head gently.

"No, Adie, you won't be. Please, for me, just stay there for a few days. And if you don't like it, then I'll put you back with Easy," he said in that quiet voice of his. His icy blue eyes pierced through me to my very soul. The remaining pieces of my heart hummed in acquiescence. I sighed, my shoulders dropping. I smiled, this time it was real.

"You know I can't deny you anything." The grin that spread his lips warmed my heart. He grabbed my hand and started walking away from where we were standing to the middle of town.

"Besides, I think you and I are due at Lew's quarters. He should be getting back at any moment."

"Back?!" I repeated curiously. Dick nodded.

"Yeah. He was jumping with the boys from the 17th," he said, his lip curling upwards in what could have been a smirk. My eyebrows shot upwards and I had to cover my mouth to stop from laughing in surprise.

"That lucky bastard!" I exclaimed, eliciting a chuckle from Dick, "So how did this come about?" Dick shrugged nonchalantly.

"I guess the opportunity came up and Sink offered it to him," he explained. There was something in his tone, something about the way his shoulders were suddenly set that had me halting in my tracks and dragging him back to me.

"What's wrong?" For a moment, I could see the hesitancy in his eyes until finally he sighed.

"I was in a supply briefing this morning. And afterward, Sink took me to the side and expressed a....a concern for Lew's drinking habits. Apparently he's gone down there with a hang-over more than once. Not to mention he takes that damned flask everywhere he goes." My eyebrows furrowed in sympathy, in confusion. Nix drank more alcohol than any man that I'd ever seen. Including my own father. A chill raced down my spine and filled me with a sense of foreboding.

"So what's Sink going to do about it?"

"He's demoted him. Nix is going to be back down at Regiment again," he explained as he swiped a hand impatiently through his hair, "I just don't understand what's gotten into him lately. It's like everything to him has lost its importance." I laid a hand on his cheek, willing the sadness that I found in his eyes to vanish. He closed his eyes, the feel of his heart pounding loud and hard against my fingertips. I could feel him leaning into my touch, his tall frame shrouding mine temporarily from the evils of the world. I smiled before letting my hand glide gently back to my side. The lack of my warmth caused his eyes to pop open. He observed me for a moment, hope in a dusty haze staring back at me.

"Whatever he's going through, Dick, all you can do is be there for him. Even if he tries to push you away, you have to stay by his side. It'll pass. These things always do."

"Are you speaking from experience?" I stared adamantly at the ground, my throat constricting painfully.

"I guess I am." I could sense his hand hovering next to my chin. But before he could close the distance, someone called his name.

"Major Winters?" With a heavy sigh that had me giggling against my better judgment, he walked forward.

"Yes, what is it?" he asked the young runner. The private's gaze lingered on me, his eyes traveling slowly up and down my body. His lusty smile had me wanting to take a step backwards, but I couldn't do that. I wouldn't show weakness. Finally, he turned his attention to Dick, who had missed the exchange because of his irritation.

"Sir, Colonel Strayer needs you at Battalion HQ. He says it's urgent." Dick nodded and then doubled back to me. He held my face between his hands and placed a gentle kiss to my forehead.

"You go on and see Nixon. I'll be there as soon as I get finished with this." I nodded as his fingers slipped from me. I watched him walk away, feeling undeniably uncomfortable in the presence of the runner who was lingering much too long. I started away from him, my fingers tightening around the knife at my hip.

"Hey! Would you like me to escort you? A beautiful woman like yourself shouldn't be going anywhere alone." I twirled on my heel, my eyebrows shooting upwards at the sight of his dazzling smile. Despite my better judgment, I nodded. Something inside calming slightly. He sidled up next to me, his mouth working out a quiet whistle. He seemed so at ease as we continued on our way toward Nixon's quarters. And even though I was a little less cautious, he still made me uneasy. My stomach was twisted in knots of anxiety and my heart was racing just a little too fast for me to trust him at all.

The walk was awkward and tense, each muscle poised for escape. I sighed in relief when I saw the familiar outline of Nixon's door. I turned at the doorway on the pretense of telling him good-bye. I wasn't expecting his hand to shoot out and capture mine between his strong fingers. Giving me a smoldering look, he bowed his head and put a soft kiss to the back of my hand.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Jones. Maybe we'll meet again sometime soon." He stood up, his eyes measuring me up again. I wrenched my hand from his grasp and jumped backward into the door. Without even knocking I threw it open and slammed it shut behind me. As quickly as I could, I turned around and searched the room for Nixon.

"Lew? Nix, are you in here?" I couldn't stop the desperation from resounding in my voice. My heart was rising to a cacophonous clamor within my breast. My breathing hitched until all I could hear were the reactions of my body to the mystery man's advances.

What I heard next sent a shudder of relief up my spine, "I'm in here, Adie." My fingers curled silently into my palms, biting the skin there and sobering me slightly from my encounter. My legs moved under me, taking me closer to safety. Finally, I found him in the very back room, his fingers already untying his combat boots. I tried not to let my fear show as I leaned against the door frame.

"Hey, Nix, you lucky dog! You've been making combat jumps while the rest of us had to stay here in dreary old Sturzelberg," I laughed, my smile showing him that I was only teasing. But instead of the throaty chuckle I expected, Nix scoffed.

"Yeah, I'd much rather have been here, Adie." My eyebrows furrowed of their own accord as I watched him move slowly around the room. His fingers closed tightly over the neck of a bottle of Vat 69.

"Right, well you could tell me how the jump went. You look dreadful," I remarked. And he did look awful. His skin was more pallid than I'd ever remembered it being, even in Bastogne. His eyes had a faraway look to them, as if he was trying not to think about anything around him. His hands were shaking slightly and somehow, I knew it had nothing to do with the alcohol running through his system.

"The plane blew up," he said, pouring the last of the Vat 69 into his glass. His voice was quiet, betraying an underlying need for someone to just sit and listen to him for once. Then, his nonchalant demeanor was back. A subtle smirk played along his lips as he passed me, his wrist flicking just enough for the empty bottle to drop into a pale beside the door.

"I got out. Two others got out." I rushed after him, watching his movements as he traced his steps toward a large table with about ten bottles of liquor atop it. He shook around two bottles before he finally found one that wasn't completely drained. He poured the amber liquid into his glass and then took a seat, staring up at me with a grimace on his face.

"I'm so sorry, Nix. I shouldn't have as-," I began, but he cut me off with a humorless chuckle.

"Yes, you do like to wreak havoc on the men around you. Don't you, Adie?" His eyes were shining with unflinching honesty. I tried to not let it get to me, but I could tell my efforts were useless, "My best friend, me...Hell even the man you love has taken all sorts of shit from you." I felt the tears well up in my eyes and I brushed them away angrily.

"Nix, what the hell happened out there?" I asked him, my voice drained of the anger I so wished to direct toward him.

"What happened was that all those guys died except for me and two other guys. Their damn commander was killed too. So, guess who gets to write the Goddamned letters home to their families?" I scrambled for something to say, but my mind had suddenly turned to goo. Instead of saying anything, I walked around the table and took the seat next to him. Gingerly, I laid a hand on his forearm and gave it a comforting squeeze. I felt his skin beneath mine, pliant and warm beneath my fingers.

"Nix, you know you can't drink it away. When you're sober, their memories will still be here waiting to begin haunting you," I whispered, trying to be as real as I could without hurting him too much. Instead of knocking some sense into him, however, he wrenched his arm away from me and flew out of his chair. He slammed his glass onto the table and hurried away from me toward the window.

"What the hell do you know, Adie? You've got two guys after you. Maybe even more that you don't know about. And you've got the nerve to stand there and talk down to me?"

"Lew, I'm not talking down to you. I'm trying to make you see that drinking-it won't work. I've seen it before and I've even tried it myself before."

"You? I highly doubt that," Nix replied off-offhandedly, sarcasm dripping heavily from his lips. But I could see the curiosity burning in his clouded-over eyes.

I bit my lip, knowing that the only way he would ever believe me would be to tell him. Not only about my father and his drinking but also about Fleischer. I opened my mouth several times with the intent to be to explain. Only I couldn't find the words and my throat was tightening by the second. Nix seemed to notice the way my jaw had tightened and my hands were shaking in my fear.

"Adie? You okay?" He crossed the room and grabbed my hands, "God, woman, you're shaking." With a shake of his head, he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. I could feel the intense heat beneath his uniform. It filled me up and warmed my chilled skin. I pressed my nose to the collar of his jacket and took a deep, steadying breath.

"Nix, I had a drunk for a father," I said, speeding through the words as if just getting them out as fast I could would make telling him my dark past easier in the long run, "He would beat me when I spoke out against him. One day, he took my mom and my little sister. They got in the car and I never saw them again after that. They were all killed in a car accident that day. That's when I joined the war effort as a nurse. And two years ago a man approached me about getting more actively involved with helping the allies win the war as a spy in the German SS. Of course I agreed. I was miserable at the hospital and I had no friends. I had no idea what I was getting into. And before I knew it, I was being raped by a German officer." I closed my eyes tightly, hoping that he wouldn't do what I thought he might do. And if he did do it, then I knew I would deserve it. I'd betrayed my country by allowing something like that to happen to myself. I'd betrayed myself for not fighting against it. Not once had I ever tried to stop him from violating me body and soul. And most importantly, I had betrayed Ron. I had wanted him to take my virginity. It was supposed to be special and romantic. But, I'd let a filthy, adulterous German take the most precious part of me and tear it to shreds.

So, when Nix just pulled me closer, I gasped in delicate surprise. He placed a tender kiss to my temple as we swayed in time to silent music.

"Oh, Adie. I had no idea. I-I'm sorry," he whispered in my ear, humility raging in his tone. I shook my head and leaned away from him.

"You're surprisingly calm about this," I said cautiously, scared to death that at any moment he would take his pistol and shoot me. Making an example of the disgusting whore that I felt I was.

"Of course I'm not calm. I'd like to hunt the bastard down and tear him limb from limb for doing that to you. But I'm not that good of an intelligence officer. I'm sure I wouldn't be able to track him down quick enough for my taste. Besides, I'm judging by the look on your face that I'm the first person you've ever told about this," he said, his thumb tracing comforting circles in the small of my back. I nodded, still doubting his easy acceptance of my past. He smiled at me, love throbbing in his warm brown eyes.

"So, have you told Sparky yet?" he asked me, pulling me close again. My cheek caressed his shoulder as I sighed.

"No. I don't know how to tell him. All this time I've been harping on him for lying to me. And yet I've kept this from him this whole time." Nix nodded in understanding. I felt his lips brush my hair before he laid his cheek against the top of my head.

"Well, if the man can't accept the fact, then he doesn't deserve you, Adie. You just have to wait for the right time to tell him. And I'm sure if you tell him instead of him having to find out some other way, it won't be so bad. I've seen the way he looks at you. He may not admit it but he probably thinks you shit rainbows," Nix said. I pulled back from him, my eyes narrowing into slits. I smacked his arm even as laughter began to overcome us both.

"You stupid, bloody wanker." Nix stopped for a moment, instantly sobered.

"What the hell's a wanker?" I could only laugh harder in response.

**Yeah so lots and lots of angst there in this chapter. And I hope that all you Winters fans are happy with all the Dick interactions. I have to admit that including him a lot more in the story has made my muse happy. Hm...maybe my subconscious is trying to tell me something. Lol**

**This one was entirely unexpected. Especially the bit with Nixon. If you think it's out of character, then I'm sorry. But I really think that Nix would have acted differently with a woman than with Dick in this situation. I mean, the guy is a total softie when you get right down to it. That's what I believe anyway. :D**

**And I know that this is way over due, but I'm not at all finished with chapter 32. So that probably won't be out for a while. Just so you guys know and don't start freaking out with the lack of updates. I've got something completely unexpected planned for the next chapter. And I hope that you all like it because I'm gonna work it and see what happens. **


	33. Chapter 32

Ron's POV

I couldn't help but feel like my days had taken on a sense of meaninglessness that filled every minute of every hour. There was nothing there to distract me from being without her. Dick had made good on his word to keep her away from me. And a part of me felt like I deserved it. I'd put her through hell and back countless times. Another part of me, the part that was winning, knew that what he was doing was wrong. He was lying to her now. He was making decisions for her, something she would not appreciate in the slightest.

But I couldn't say anything. I had no idea how she would react to me now that she was conscious and had had time to think about the baby. I closed my eyes shut tightly as I imagined her soft body colliding with my own. That's when I heard it. The quiet gasp and the tightening of her fingers around the front of my uniform. I opened my eyes to see her standing in front of me in the flesh and blood.

"Adie?!" I muttered, too scared to find that this was a dream rather than reality. As if my voice had ignited something wild and chaotic within her, she thrashed looking desperately for an escape. On instinct, my fingers clasped around her wrists, holding her to me. My heart was soaring, my pulse raising to a crescendo in my ears.

"Let me go," she whispered. Her tone was pleading, something that nearly broke my heart. I'd hurt her too much for a simple sorry to make it all go away. As if she could sense the wave of horrors about to wash over her, she closed her eyes and shook her head.

"Adie, stop it!" I commanded, as much to assuage her fear as my own. And as if she was waking from a dream, her body melted in my arms and her eyelids revealed those green orbs that I loved so much. She looked up at me with so much relief and love that a strangled whimper passed my lips. Her arms came up to wrap around my neck, massaging the hairs there until I could feel the tremors wracking my eager body.

"Ron, oh God," she cried as her hold on me increased, "Don't let me go." I could tell that she was on the verge of breaking down in hysterics. Her eyes were darting everywhere, her lips were quivering in fearful anticipation, and the color had drained from her face. The sickening pallor that filled her cheeks now had my stomach plummeting to the ground. My hands moved from her wrists to hold her face. I held her gently, not wanting to hurt her any more than I already had. Beneath my fingers, I could feel her racing pulse. And as she looked into my eyes, it began to slow. A dreamy smile slowly traveled along her lips.

"I've missed you," she admitted. I felt my expression soften, but I knew that I couldn't close the distance between us. I had hurt her too much and pushing her too far too soon would mess everything up. She had to come to me on her own terms now.

"I...." my voice trailed away, leaving the air thick with uncertainty and the threat of regret. Would telling her that I missed her too ruin this? I didn't think it would, but I couldn't know for sure. Before I could finish, her eyes closed. I could see the tears starting to form beneath those eyelids and I sighed heavily.

"Ron, it's okay-." I ran my thumb along her bottom lip, effectively silencing her so that I could get out what I wanted to say to her. I could see the surprise written on her face. But I knew she wouldn't interrupt me again.

"Shut up for a minute so I can get this out," I said, my voice coming out sharper than I'd meant it to. I tightened my grip on her cheeks, making sure that she would see me when I said this. I felt somehow that this would be the first small step in fixing things between us.

"I've missed you too, Adie. And I'm sorry I wasn't there when you woke up," I told her. My heart and throat swelled when I saw the smile that she was giving me. Something inside me seemed to settle. Some of the chaos that had become my life over the last month seemed to recede into the back of my mind. This would dispel some of the despair that I'd felt on being away from her for so long. And as her soft lips planted a kiss on my cheek, I felt like I would melt to the floor. Every muscle and fiber of my being was poised on the edge of doing something irreparably damaging. I tensed, my arms rippling with the effort of keeping her body a safe distance away from me. As I felt the precipice threatening to give way, my awareness of her was broken.

"Speirs!" I heard Winters call my name. Fighting the urge to roll my eyes, I slipped away from her. I didn't miss the flash of a frown that lighted her features. I fought down a smile as I came to stand in front of Dick. He looked like a man burning. His jaw was tensed and his eyebrows were furrowed in careful constraint.

"I thought I told you to stay away from her," he said, making sure to keep his voice low enough for her not to hear. I growled, the sound permeating through my chest in a dark wave.

"And I told you that she should be able to make up her own mind about me," I told him, my hands balling into fists. Dick's eyes flashed in his anger. He took a small, almost imperceptible, step toward me and squared his shoulders.

"Well, we'll see how you'll find the time to bother her while she's at Battalion." The statement sent me reeling. He was completely serious about keeping her away from me. And in a sudden moment of clarity, I could see no way of getting out of this twisted hell on Earth. I didn't know how to win her back. I didn't know how to tell her that everything would be okay if we could just be together. Because I knew that it would never happen. I knew that it wasn't true. And I was done lying to her, so I did the only thing I could do. I left again.

For now, Dick was winning. But I hoped that soon, I would be able to turn the tables in my favor.

Adelina's POV

I was sent lurching sideways into Dick's lap as our jeep was suddenly whipped to the side. I screwed my eyes shut for a moment, trying to get rid of the headache now pounding its way through my head as I sat up again. When I opened my eyes, Dick and Welsh were both watching me with amused expressions on their faces.

"Lew, if you ever do that again, I think I might kill you," I grumbled, making a show of crossing my arms and leaning back in my stiff seat. Lew turned in his own seat to wink at me.

"You couldn't kill me, sweetheart, and you know it," he told me with a chuckle. The sound softened me a little. I knew that he was still brooding over what had happened with the jump and I wasn't about to be the cause of his mood darkening again.

"Yeah, well, next time you won't be as lucky," I said, a small smile tugging at my lips. I turned my head to the side to see Dick watching me closely. I stared back at him, feeling a light blush tinging my cheeks. I bit my lip and looked away, my eyes scrolling along the valleys and hills of the German countryside as we passed. In the distance, I could make out the shape of the jeep that was carrying Ron and Lipton. Even from here, I could feel my skin tingle, white hot with awareness. My stomach filled with butterflies and my hands trembled with the energy I'd been exercising for the past week to stay away from him. Ever since that day in Sturzelberg, I'd been wanting to go to him so badly it hurt. And every night I dreamed of him. All of them ended the same way: with a happy ending. But somehow, I felt-no I knew- that our story wouldn't end like that. I could sense the winds of disaster striking down on us even now, threatening to destroy everything that we'd worked so hard to establish.

I took in a shaky breath, willing myself to think of other things as our jeep came to a crawling stop behind the other trucks. Soldiers, those of Easy and the rest of 2nd Battalion, jumped out of the backs and milled around. All of them waiting for their orders. I watched them all for a second before I became aware of a calloused hand weaving its fingers through my own.

"Adie, are you going to sit in this jeep all day or do you want to go and see the room you'll be staying in?" Dick asked me, his breath drifting lazily against my neck. The gentle caress sent my mind reeling and my heart fluttering. Feeling more than a little dazed, I nodded, allowing him to help me down from the vehicle. I knew looking into his sparkling blue eyes that I was close to the edge of going completely crazy with having to pick between two equally amazing men again.

I closed my eyes, considering for probably the hundredth time how easy it would be to fall for him. To forget Ron forever. But the result was too painful. To live without him, even at the prospect of retreating into Dick's arms, was even now threatening to rip me apart at the seams. I bit my lip, knowing that the impossibility would keep me from doing just that every time. I couldn't explain it, but Ron had ingrained himself so deeply into my soul that even if I'd wanted to move on, I wouldn't have been able to.

"Are you alright, Adelina?" I heard Dick ask me. I opened my eyes to see him staring down at me in concern. I smiled sadly and lifted my hand to his cheek.

"I'm fine," I told him, then let my hand fall back to my side. I realized just how lonely I felt standing here, surrounded by so many people that I loved and who I knew cared about me. My heart plummeted into my stomach and I was left with nothing but feelings of nausea and utter despair. It was like a plague. Seeping slowly into my veins and filling my entire body in a matter of moments. So instead of letting Dick take me to my room, I grabbed my bag from one of the trucks and headed there myself, muttering a hasty apology to him as I passed him again. Looking up into his eyes, I felt that familiar pang in my heart. I blinked the tears away as fast as I could, clenching my teeth to make the pain go away.

And as I was swept away in a surreal sea of self-encompassed despair, I failed to watch where I was walking. Before I knew it, I had knocked into the arms of the very person I'd been wishing for. I looked up into his face, amazed by the change that came over me. It felt like the sun was lighting my smile and I could see the way it disarmed him. I wanted nothing more than to latch onto that vulnerability and take him for all that he was right there. But I managed to keep my touch feather light, knowing that it was all I could do. I still hadn't quite dealt with the fact that he was going to have a child. I couldn't really believe it, even now. I could see the torn expression on his face, as if he couldn't decide whether grabbing me and kissing me would be right. As if he couldn't' believe that we were stuck in this situation either. And in the blink of an eye, his face transformed. His eyes hardened into two black orbs of impenetrable darkness. I couldn't' tell if he was really looking at me or if he was seeing someone else. But all that mattered was the way he was suddenly pushing me away.

"Stay away from me, Adelina." The way he said my name...it was like a curse falling from his lips. I cringed away from him, terrified of the monster that had been unleashed before my eyes.

"Ron, don't push me away," I whispered, trying desperately to hang onto him. For both of our sakes. He shook his head and retreated a few steps away. His head fell into his hands and I could have sworn that his shoulders were shaking.

"We can't see each other anymore, Adie. Please try to understand," he said, his voice shaking slightly. Just like that, he was gone. I spun around, my eyes seeking him out. But he was nowhere to be found and the reality filled me almost too fast for me to comprehend. He'd called it off. Everything that had happened to me thus far, the pain of all the lies he had forced on me, could not amount to the stabbing pains ripping the remains of my heart to shreds. I wavered, somewhere on the edge of consciousness, as I considered the implications of his decision. I could feel the tears pouring white hot down my cheeks. I clenched my teeth, trying to stop them with sheer determination. But they would not relent. The despair swept over me, threatening to kill me with its hellish fires, burning away everything that I had ever stood for. Until there was nothing left but the hollow ghost of what I had once been.

And all of a sudden, I was encompassed by someone's strong arms. I knew at once that it was Dick. He held me tightly, his quiet reassurance enough to keep the tears away. I took a shuddering breath and breathed in his familiar scent.

"Dick." The word passed my lips as a strangled whisper of need. Dick's muscles rippled beneath my fingers as he heard it. He pulled back and cupped my cheeks in his hands.

"Adie, let me show you to your room, okay?" he said softly, his voice a gentle caress on my heated flesh.

"Okay," I muttered, sounding more like a little girl than a grown woman. He took my hand and my bag from me and led me quietly through the mostly empty streets of the town that I didn't know the name of. His fingers entwined in mine gave me a temporary reprieve from my depression and I took a deep breath to steady my twisted nerves.

Before I knew it, we were inside. Our footfalls echoing through the house and sending a chill up my spine. I closed my eyes, letting Dick lead me blindly through the turns of the building. When we came to a stop, I opened them again and sighed in relief at the sight of the bed waiting for me. I let go of Dick's hand and walked forward. Letting my fingers slip across the bed covers, I felt a smile curve my lips.

"Oh, Dick, it's wonderful. How in the world did you manage to get me this?" I asked him as I sat down and sank into the soft bed. Dick chuckled, his blue eyes twinkling animatedly. He set my bag down and then came to stand beside the bed, looking down at me affectionately.

"Being a Major has certain advantages," he said, giving me a playful smirk. I stared up at him, all playfulness receding from my brain. Here was a man willing to give me anything and everything in the world, and I couldn't stop hanging onto something that would never ever turn out right. Ron was all wrong for me, I knew that. Dick, however, was just the person that I could see the old me spending the rest of my life with. And I felt that if I could just give myself the chance to fall in love with him, then I would be able to get over Ron. The point was if I really wanted to. Was forgetting about him any less painful than wasting the rest of my life without him? I didn't know and a part of me, a small part of me, was crying out for release. Any sort of release.

All of these things raced through my mind as I stared up at Dick, who had stuck by me through everything. And as my hand shot out through the vast valley between us, I knew I'd made my decision.

"Please stay with me, Dick," I whispered, hoping against hope that he would. I knew where the hesitancy had come from. Ron had left me on countless occasions and I thought that Dick would do the same thing to me. So, when Dick let go of my hand and moved away from me, I wasn't surprised. But

a moment later, I felt his presence beside me on the bed. I turned to see him watching me concernedly. His hand snaked across the covers and caressed my cheek gently.

"I'm not going anywhere, do you understand?" he muttered, staring so deeply into my eyes that I could feel his soul brushing my own. And with that stroke of his essence against mine, I leaned forward and brushed my lips against his. I didn't know what made me do it, but it felt so right to kiss him. However, reality had a way of catching up to me, and I was leaning away. Aware that I might have overstepped my bounds. But his hand came up around my neck and held me there. His other arm came around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I couldn't help but notice the way my small frame fit perfectly against his body. When I felt his tongue trace the outline of my bottom lip, I gasped in surprise. My mouth fell open, allowing him entrance into the soft caverns behind my lips. Breathless and panting softly, I leaned away from him for a moment, seeing the lust I was suddenly feeling reflected back at me from his eyes. And before I could really let my thoughts catch up with me, his lips were on me again. Moving slowly but steadily along my jaw and down my neck.

"Oh God," I whispered as the passion and raging lust warred within me against my better judgment. I remembered the last time we'd been in this position.

_Feeling that I could stand it no longer, I reached forward and brushed my lips against his. _

"_You're making it so difficult not to fall in love with you," I whispered when I was finally able to pull away. _

And I remembered how wrong it had turned out.

"_Adelina, I think it would be better if we were just friends," he said in a rush, as if saying it faster would lessen the pain of the truth._

I didn't want it to end, not this time. I knew that something between us had changed. Somehow I felt like this was where I was supposed to be. In the grips of the man who'd stood beside me through every time that Ron had broken my thoughts. As Dick's fingers slipped along the buttons of my jacket, I closed my eyes. Willing the onslaught of images that were suddenly whirling through my head to go away. All of them were _him_. He'd taken me mind, body, and soul. Now there was no way of going back. No amount of wishing and wanting on my part for something different would ever change that. That's why I had no choice but to pull away from Dick and wrap my arms around myself.

"Dick, I can't....I'm sorry," I gasped, my chest hurting so badly that I was sure I must be dying because of it. I wasn't expecting the reaction I got. Dick stood up so fast from the bed that my eyes had to take a moment to adjust. My face came up to watch him expectantly. I knew from the way my stomach dropped that I'd ruined everything. The fury in his expression scared me more than anything Speirs had thrown at me. Perhaps because it was so unexpected. I had anticipated Dick's quiet understanding. But not this, never this.

"So it's him again?" he asked, his voice devoid of emotion, proving just how much I'd broken him.

"Dick, I'm sorry. I wish things could be different. I can't be everything that you deserve. I would never ask you to stay with me when I'm so far gone to him." I felt the tears pressing against the backs of my eyes and I blinked, keeping them at bay as long as I could. I knew what was going through Dick's mind by the way he was now looking at me.

_I could fix you. Just stay with me. _I couldn't. I knew now that Ron had ruined me for other men. No one would ever be enough compared to him. And it killed me.

"Don't do this, Adie. You're letting him do this to you. I can't just sit by anymore and watch it happen," Dick said, pleading gently with me to see reason. It was too late for that. The fires that had been ignited within me would never be extinguished. I knew it was stupid and foolish. But when you find the one person that can make you feel that way, you hold onto them. Even if they aren't with you. The mere memory of them is enough to haunt you for your entire life.

"Dick, someday you'll thank me for this. I can't explain it, but nothing you or anyone else can give me will be enough. You deserve better. I can't hurt you for the rest of our lives. That would kill me too. Please try to understand, Dick." A moment of silence stretched into eternity and I floundered when I saw the look that passed over his face. When he opened his mouth, I knew that his words would chip away yet another piece of my heart.

"So I guess me bringing you to Battalion didn't change anything, huh?" he asked me, his eyes full of emotions that I could not place. The starkness of the question sent my head spinning. And as if someone had shed some light on the situation, I recalled the words Ron had spoken to me.

"_We can't see each other anymore, Adie." _ Everything clicked into place and a cold shudder ran down my spine. The fight that I dimly remembered when I'd still been in the hospital. When Dick had told me I would be transferred to Battalion so that he could keep a better eye on me. It was all a ploy.

"Dick, you...You've been keeping him away from me haven't you?" I asked him, knowing full well that I knew exactly what he'd been doing. I looked into his eyes, seeing the affirmation there. I gasped, putting a hand over my mouth to keep the screams inside. A sense of betrayal and hurt spread through my veins, filling me until I was sure that I would feel this way forever. And before I knew it, I was pointing at the door, telling him to get out.

"Adie," he began to protest, "I did it to protect you." I shook my head, confusion clouding my mind.

"Dick, please just go. I need time," I said, my voice filled with silent pleas. Dick took a step toward me, his eyes beseeching me to forgive him for what he'd done.

"I never meant to hurt you, Adie."

"I know you didn't, Dick," I said quietly, sadly. How could Dick's intentions ever been anything but honorable. But, nevertheless, he'd lied to me. Just like Ron. And as much as I wanted to forgive and forget this very moment, I couldn't.

"Dick, you lied to me. I know you didn't mean to hurt me, but you just have to give me time to think about this," I said. I turned my eyes upward, finding his instantly.

"Think about what, Adie?" I could see it in his eyes. He wanted me to acknowledge the fact that what we'd shared had complicated things permanently. I looked back into his eyes confidently.

"The kiss, the fact that you lied to me, the feelings I'm still grappling with for Ron. Everything, Dick." A small smile appeared on his face and as hurt as I was, I could still feel a twinge of joy at the sight. He nodded gently and then strode toward the door. His fingers closed around the doorknob. Before he could open the door, however, he turned back to me. The determination in his eyes had me flushing a deep red before he'd said a word.

"I just want you to know that I won't pressure you into choosing, Adie. I want you to be happy, you know that. I love you, more than you could ever know. I just wanted to make sure that I even had a chance with you," he said. And then he was gone. With a shuddering breath, I sank to the floor. The tumult of emotions tugging at my heart finally taking over. The tears rose to my eyes and I hugged my knees to my chest, wishing that for once, my life wouldn't be such a mess.

**Shorter than normal I know. But hey I think of this as more of a prequel chapter to chapter 33. So I think it was fitting that it was a little bit shorter than usual.**

**Anyways, no disrespect is meant to the men on which this story is based. I only own the BoB series on DVD, not the copyrights. **

**Okay one last note before I let you all go. If you're interested, I make regular(pretty regular) updates on how my stories are going. I'm also on Twitter. And if enough people add me on there then I'll start updating that regularly as well. My thing is Ber1719. Pretty easy to remember right?**


	34. Chapter 33

**Okay a quick note before I let you guys read this chapter. Nearer to the end, the italics are my way of showing that the characters are speaking German. It's easier that way and I forwent the risk of offending someone by using google translate. Alright...happy reading. :)**

Adelina's POV

I flitted around my room, shooting glares at Nixon every once in a while. For the last hour and a half, he had been attempting to convince me to go and see Dick. To hear him apologize for the pain he had caused me. But I couldn't.

"You don't get it, Nix. I can't just forgive him and act like nothing's happened. He lied to me." I wrung my hands together, wondering what he would say next. His dark eyes glittered and his lips curved upwards into a wicked smirk.

"Adie, you've forgiven Ron for worse things like this. It's been a week already. And you haven't had to deal with the aftermath of what you did to him," he told me, his voice remaining calm. I could tell that just under the surface something was boiling white hot through his blood. Begging for release, waiting for the opportune moment to be unleashed.

"Nix, that's my point exactly. I expect this from Ron, but not Dick," I sighed. It felt like I'd told myself this same line every minute of every day for the last month. But I knew that the argument was quickly becoming inconsequential. I missed Dick and it was only a matter of time before I broke. But what would I say to him?

_I know we kissed, Dick, but it didn't mean anything. I'm in love with Ron. Nothing can change that._

No, I couldn't hurt him like that. Not after what I'd done to him. Not after kissing him like that. Feeling that burning passion for him. I was so confused. All I wanted was for things to be normal again. Without being so torn between two equally extraordinary men. I didn't want to be miserable anymore. I knew, though, that neither of those options was possible for me. Not now when my mind was so filled with all of the things that I knew.

"Well you can't avoid the both of them forever, Adie. You have a choice to make," Nix said before getting up from his seat on the bed. He crossed the room where I was still pacing, the restlessness of my mind making it impossible to sit still for very long. He set two strong hands on my arms and pulled me close, his lips finding their way to my clammy forehead. He planted a light kiss there before pulling away.

"We're pulling out in two hours, Adie," Nix told me quietly before closing the door behind him. I sighed heavily. I knew I had a decision to make. And it was obvious who I should pick, but I knew that ultimately, my choice wouldn't be based on who was all right for me and who wasn't. It was about who I couldn't live without and I knew already who that was.

An hour and a half later and I was walking out to the trucks, my bag in my hand. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone starting toward me. I'd have been crazy not to recognize the set of his shoulders and the way his black eyes burned, seeking my gaze. My heart hammered in my chest and I had to take a deep breath to stop my hands from shaking as my bag slipped from my grasp to his. I turned to him, seeing the softness of his eyes. I couldn't help the smile that melted my expression.

"Thank you," I muttered shyly, unable to look at him any longer. He leaned around me, his body brushing feather-light against mine as he tossed my bag into one of the trucks. I memorized the faces of the men there before I had to look at Ron again. Anything that I would have said was wiped from my mind when his hand came up to cup my cheek. We stood there, our bodies barely touching, for what seemed like forever. I wanted to say something. Anything that would have abated the heat spreading like a slowly kindled flame through my veins, but my mouth wouldn't work. I wanted to pull him closer and tell him that I could forgive him again. But something was holding me back. Maybe it was the breathtaking kiss that I'd shared with Dick. Perhaps it was the fact that Nixon's words were still ringing in my ears. You have a choice to make. Or maybe it was that look in Ron's eyes that kept me from doing what I so desperately wished to. There was sadness there, mixed with regret. It was the look of a man burning in his own personal hell. It was then that I realized that he believed he'd lost me forever.

"Ron," I said, finally finding my own courage. In the face of his despair, I could not remain silent. To do so would have been irreparable and I was determined to see one of us unbroken by this twist of fate. His eyes closed at the sound of his name coming from my lips.

"Adie, I…" his voice trailed away, his feet taking him a step away from me. I would have been hurt had I not seen the look in his eyes. It was obvious the amount of restrain he was using to stay out of my reach. His expression hardened into strong determination and I knew that, for now, he had to stay away from me. What I wasn't expecting was his hand to dart into the front of his jacket and pull out a small stack of papers. I could see that only one of them was enveloped. The cursive handwriting was difficult to read at this angle and I had to stop myself from stepping closer.

"I wanted to give these to you. The one on top is from William Guarnere. The rest are…well, I'm sure you'll find out soon enough," he said as he reached forward to press the letters into my hands. I felt my heart skip at the feel of his fingers brushing against mine.

"Thank you, Ron," I said, looking anywhere but at him. If I looked at him, I knew my resolve would break. If I looked at him, I would jump into his arms and never leave. He nodded quickly, obviously torn between making a hasty retreat and lingering for a moment too long by my side. Before either of us could move, I heard a familiar voice rise in fury.

"She's taking my dog!" Nixon's voice carried on the wind to where I was standing. I glanced at Ron and gave him a small smile.

"I'm sorry. I wish I could stay," I muttered, taking a chance on reaching between us and squeezing his hand. I didn't wait to gauge his reaction. Moving as quickly between the guys as possible, I made my way towards where I thought Nix was. I knew even before I'd gotten there that Dick would be there too. Where Nixon was, Dick was bound to be close by. So when I saw him standing there beside the jeep, Nixon opposite him, I shouldn't have been surprised. But I was. My heart gave a painful lurch into my throat, rendering my speechless. Nix's eyes flashed from him to me in a moment. Dick, startled at the softening of his friend so quickly, turned around to see what had gained his attention. When his gaze met mine, I felt the world shrink around me and I knew that it had been silly of me to avoid him. Seeing him looking at me like this was all the incentive I needed to make my choice.

"Adie?" his voice called me gently from my own thoughts. Hesitantly, still unsure of what I would say to him, I took a step forward and took his hand.

"Dick-," I began, but he held up his hand to stop me from talking. I bit my lip, letting him know that I would let him talk first. He cupped my cheek, stroking calming circles on the back of my hand.

"I just want to tell you how sorry I am for what I did. I never meant to hurt you. But I…I see now that keeping you away from him just makes things that much worse. You should be able to make your own decisions when it comes to him," he told me, his voice quiet so that no one but me could hear him. I pressed my free hand to my chest, feeling the letters poking me through the front of my jacket. I couldn't make the words come. Dick hugged me to his chest, understanding in every brush of his body against mine.

"Thank you, Dick. You don't know how much this means to me," I whispered, hanging onto him almost desperately. He pressed his soft lips to my hair. I could feel his smile and the chuckle that suddenly reverberated through his chest.

I sensed that there was more that he wanted to say, but couldn't quite find the words for his thoughts. I pulled away long enough to look up into his eyes.

"So does this mean I can go back to Easy?" I asked him jokingly. He rolled his eyes playfully.

"Shut up and get in the jeep, Adie." I giggled and stood on the tips of my toes to kiss him on the cheek.

"Thank you, Dick. Really," I said, making sure that he saw just how thankful I was that we'd worked it out. He nodded and jumped into the passenger seat as we all prepared to leave. I turned my head just enough to look at Nixon, who was staring at me with a smug smirk on his face. I waggled a finger at him.

"Not a word Lewis, or I just might ask what it was that you were yelling about a minute ago," I said. His face darkened considerably and he followed Dick's example, opting to ignore me rather than reply. I laughed again, feeling more light and free than I had in months. It seemed like things might be finally falling into place for me. If only I'd known what lay in store for us.

_Landsberg, Germany_

The trucks slowed to a stop, the deafening roar of the engines suddenly replaced by the rising voices of all the men. I hopped off the jeep and watched as Dick and Nix were surrounded by all the 2nd Battalion officers. Dick told Ron to get a group of Easy guys together to scout the surrounding area. Eager for something to do and confident that Ron would let me go, I went up to him when the officers had disbanded. He saw me out of the corner of his eye and turned toward me, his lips forming that smile that I loved so much.

"I'm guessing you want to go?" he said, his eyebrow raising slightly at the light in my eyes and the red blush covering my cheeks.

"You know me too well…Of course I want to go. It's better than helping Eugene set up an aid station that we'll have to tear apart in three days anyway." Ron chuckled, the sound warming me to the tips of my toes. I couldn't help myself as my hand slid away from my side and entwined itself with his. He tensed for a moment before relaxing at my touch.

"Well, we wouldn't to put through that torture, now would we?" he asked, sarcasm dripping from his lips. He gave me a quick smile before shouting over the rising crescendo of conversations around us, "Easy Company!" In a matter of minutes, the familiar faces of all the men I'd been serving with appeared around us. A few of them, the ones who'd teased me about being in love with Ron, noticed out poorly hidden entwined hands and grinned. But they didn't say anything, for which I was very thankful.

"Major Winters wants us to scout the area alright? I want 1st and 2nd to go through the woods. You guys in 3rd I want you to swing around. Adie here will be with 1st. And be careful, we're too far along for anyone to get hurt." We could all hear it and I could see by the widening of all of their eyes that they knew exactly what he was really saying.

_If anything happens to Adie, I'll kill every one of you._

Visions of what they must have seen happen to him when I'd almost been killed flashed through my mind. I had to shake my head to dispel it of the unwanted images. Suddenly, I felt a whisper of cold air fill the places where Ron's fingers had been touching my own. My eyes snapped open and a whimper fell from my mouth. The fear that he would leave me now was irrational and I couldn't explain it away easily. As I caught sight of him, he tried to cover up the fact that he'd heard it by turning to look at all the men still standing around us.

"Alright, good luck guys. You should be done within the hour and then you can have the night off." We all nodded and feeling unsure of how to say goodbye, I just turned away from Ron and started to follow the others. When I was nearly out of his arm's length, his fingers closed around my wrist. I twisted around, feeling a sick sense of pleasure that he hadn't simply let me go without saying anything. He looked down at me, his dark eyes clouded over with something I couldn't put a name to.

"Please stay safe, Adie. I couldn't bare it if you got hurt again." His voice was a seductive purr in my ear. The shiver of ecstasy that rolled down my spine caused my lips to fall open. The soft moan that filled the air made his grip on me to rise. With a growl, he kissed my cheek once and then pulled away. I grinned playfully.

"You know, we could just go back to your room and you could have your way with me," I told him, making sure that it was only him that could hear him. He surprised me by winking at me and then pushing me toward the guys, who were wisely looking at anything but us. I couldn't believe the amount of happiness that my heart now held. Especially when only a few short hours ago, I'd been choking on the overwhelming despair I''d been feeling. But I wouldn't complain. This is what I'd wanted. For just a brief reprieve from the dullness of my world. I sent a silent thank you to whoever might have been listening. When I focused again on the men around me, I saw that they were all watching me with amused looks on their faces. Everyone but O'Keefe who looked slightly jumpy and afraid of everything. I quirked an eyebrow at them and settled in the middle of the group beside Perconte.

"I know you're all dying to take a crack at me. So, get on with it," I said, the smile shining through despite my annoyance. Luz was the first to laugh.

"What the hell was that, Adie? Speirs looked like he was undressing you with his eyes back there," he said, wiggling his eyebrows at me. I rolled my eyes, the blood already pooling in my cheeks.

"He was not, George!"

"Oh yeah he was, sweetheart," Alley called over his shoulder. I resisted the urge to stomp my foot in frustration. I knew it would only make them tease me more.

"Well, even if he was, I'm sure you wouldn't want to know about it," I said, seeing an opportunity to get back at them at least a little bit. They all made various noises of disgust.

"Adie!" Perconte and Luz groaned at the same time. I snickered, shoving my hands into my pockets.

"Such is the way of the world, boys. You've gotta take as well as you can give," I told them, my giddiness making my voice shake a little.

"The whole point of us teasing you is so that you can blush and get all flustered. Not for you to throw it back in our faces, Adie. Where's the fun in that?"

"I'm having fun," I said smartly. But the smile suddenly slipped from my face when I saw movement through the trees up ahead, "Is anyone seeing what I'm seeing?" I saw them all nod silently. Alley put a finger to his lips before leading the way toward the edge of the forest. Perconte and Luz, who were in the middle of the group, put me between them. I went without complaint, my fingers squeezing painfully around my bag as I struggled to hang onto something that didn't inspire fear.

The smell hit us first. It held the scent of death and suffering beyond any of our imaginations. Burning flesh mixed with the smell of rotting corpses and human feces. I screwed my eyes shut, willing my hammering chest to find peace.

As the tree branches thinned and our eyes adjusted to the sunlight shining through the clouds, I felt a cold chill run down my spine. And all at once, I wanted nothing more than to throw up. Erected before us was a wire fence caging in what looked like living, breathing, talking skeletons. They were slowly lining up against the fence that separated them from us. Their shirts were open, exposing their clearly visible ribs and their unwashed chests. I took a step forward, the need to help them overpowering every nerve ending in my being. Someone's hand closed around mine.

"Don't, Adelina. I know it's hard, but I need you to go back. Tell Winters-Speirs-whoever you can find that we've found something." I nodded and they let go of me. I stared into the eyes of the prisoners, feeling my heart wrench painfully. Most of them had empty eyes. As if they'd already given up on coming out of this alive. But a few of them seemed to be aware of our presence now. Their bony hands were moving, beckoning us forward weakly. I closed my eyes shut for a moment, willing the images burned into my mind to go away. But they wouldn't. I knew that I would never ever forget this as long as I lived.

"Adie, go!" Luz and Bull shouted at me. And just like that, I was gone. My legs were pounding beneath me, moving faster than they ever had in my life. Faster and faster I flew, and I knew that I would never be fast enough. These people were suffering and I felt like I was running through water. My heart was pounding in my head, in my legs, in my throat. I swallowed the air in great gulps. And finally, I saw the men milling about. Recognizing Pop-Eye, I grabbed his hand. My eyes were frantic and my knees were shaking so badly that I knew I would pass out at any moment.

"Where's Winters?" I asked him, my voice wispy from the lack of air in my lungs. Pop-Eye shrugged, his face shifting in response to the desperation in my eyes.

"What's the matter, Adie?" he asked me, but I didn't answer him. I ran over to Babe, asking him the same question.

"Speirs is searching those buildings down there," he told me, pointing down the road a ways. It was too far. I floundered, torn between running down there or trying to find Dick, who would probably be closer. I decided to take my chance and took off again. My lungs were fit to burst when I slid into the building where I hoped Ron was.

"Ron?!" I gasped, trying my best to breathe normally again. When his head popped around the corner, I heaved a sigh of relief. I rushed forward and took his hand.

"Ron, we found something while we're out." Seeing how crazed I was, he grabbed my face in his hands, forcing me to look into his eyes.

"Adie, what's wrong, baby? What happened?" I felt the carefully concealed tears welling up in my eyes and spilling onto my cheeks. I shook my head, words escaping me. Ron nodded, the action imperceptible, and took my hand. Without a moment's hesitation, he scooped me into his arms and ran out the door with me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, clinging desperately to him. I knew who'd done that to those poor people. Men that I'd been around every minute of every day for nearly two years. And I'd only felt a sliver of their pain. I'd only experienced a miniscule drop of their suffering. As if to accentuate the differences between our situations, the same Company was coming to their rescue. I had to hold onto that thought. That hope that it wasn't too late to save most of them.

When I heard Ron's voice, soft and soothing in my ear, I realized that loud sobs were wracking my body. I shivered uncontrollably, wishing that what I knew was coming wouldn't come. But I could feel it, on the border of my subconscious, waiting for the right moment to strike and incapacitate me. The things that I had long kept hidden in the deepest depths of my soul were yearning to be released. I knew that it had to wait, though. It had to wait until I was alone before I could unleash those memories and emotions.

"Dick, it's Adie. Something's wrong," Ron's horror-stricken voice wrought through the air. I sucked in a breath, forcing myself to calm down so that they would stop worrying about me and focus on the situation at hand. We needed to get those people food and water and fast.

"I'm okay. I just....we have to get back out there," I said as I wiped my eyes frantically with my shaking hands. Dick and Ron shared a look, but decided not to comment.

"Alright, well let's get everyone back up here and then we'll go out there," Dick said, his eyes shining with a focus that I found strength in. Ron insisted that I stay with him while he rounded up the rest of Easy Company to go out to the woods. I couldn't help but hang onto his hand, my fingers entwined firmly around his.

All in all it took us an hour to get everything ready to go out. I sat in the leading jeep with Lipton, Dick, and Ron, telling Dick the directions as the trucks followed closely behind us. When we got there, I could feel the tension in the air. It was palpable and could have been cut in half with a knife. I jumped down from the truck, ready to do something. Anything to help these suffering people. That's when I realized that all I could see along the fence line were men. My eyes searched frantically, but I couldn't see one woman in their ranks. Puzzled, I turned to Dick, who had come up beside me, his face contorted into a mixture of disgust and deep sorrow for what these people had been through.

"Open it," he told Alley and Luz, who started forward immediately and cut the chains, unlocking the doors into this hell on Earth. I felt someone beside me and looked up into Ron's eyes to see something there that made me love him even more. I could see now that he didn't just care for me. I could see the horror and grief hidden in the depths of those chocolate-colored orbs that anyone could do this to their fellow man. And even in the face of all this suffering, I managed a small smile as I encased his fingers with my own. I pulled him forward, my legs working with a new-found purpose to all those people who needed our help. As we walked forward, I saw Nix and Dick, their faces clouded over with anger as we watched even more men emerging from shelters in the distance. I swallowed down my tears with difficulty. I knew that each one of us would be scarred from seeing this. But more than that, I knew these men, if they survived the night, would all carry so many un-talked of horrors of what they had endured here.

One man stood out in the crowd. He was watching us attentively, obviously wondering if he should attempt to approach us. Deciding right then to end his internal struggle, I let go of Ron's hand, moving determinedly forward.

"_We're here to help you," _I said in German, taking his arm carefully and leading him over to where Dick, Nix, and Ron were still standing. They were all watching me with something like admiration on their faces. When we were all finally standing in a wonky circle, I turned to him again.

"_Now, do you speak English?" _He quickly shook his head, his eyes roving over me in wonder. I remembered again that he had probably not seen a woman in a long time. I closed my eyes, internalizing my emotions so that I could stay focused on the task at hand.

"_Where are the guards?" _The man before me simply blinked at me, his forehead crinkling with the effort of thinking.

At last he managed to reply, _"They left this morning. T-they burned some of the huts down. And when some of the others tried to stop them, they were gunned down." _I gulped, wishing with all my heart that I wasn't here right now. Wishing that this had never happened. But, I knew that I couldn't change the past. I could only make the future look a little brighter for the people here.

"He said the guards left this morning and that they burned some of the huts down."

"Jesus Christ!" Nixon muttered gruffly.

"He also said that some of the prisoners tried to stop them and they were shot. They killed as many of them as they could before leaving and h-heading s-south." I said, biting my lip and shoving my hands into my pockets to hide the fact that they were shaking uncontrollably. Nixon was the first to catch my eye. His expression was contorted into a mask of worry and unrestrained anger.

"Dick, maybe we should get someone else up here. She shouldn't be dealing with this," he said. I shook my head, grabbing Dick's hand as he turned to wave Lipton over.

"I can do this," I said, my tone determined and set. I could do this. I had to do this. It was time that I found the courage to be there for someone else. My thoughts bristled as I remembered his words.

"If they left and headed South...then someone must have told them we were coming," I said, my eyes widening at the realization. How could anyone know about this and not do anything to stop the injustice? How could anyone condone what the Nazis were doing to these seemingly innocent people?

"_Can you tell me what this camp is for? Why are you all here?" _The man scratched his head, his face crumpling slightly from the question. I squeezed his arm, hoping to reassure him. I could feel his instinct to pull away, but he didn't. Instead, he looked into my eyes with a kind of pleading. He must have seen something there, because a small smile suddenly spread across his lips. He cleared his throat, glancing around at the others who were watching us intently, before turning his gaze back on me.

"_This is a work camp for the unwanted of German society." _

"He says it's a work camp and that they are here because they're unwanted." Dick shifted his weight from one foot to another, his forehead tight with his anxiety, his eyebrows scrunched tightly together.

"Unwanted?" he repeated, obviously confused, "Like criminals?"

"I don't think so, Dick," I muttered quietly, looking up into his face for a moment. Returning my attention to the man, _"Unwanted as in criminals?" _

A dark look passed over his face. He shook his head adamantly.

"_Not criminals. Doctors, lawyers, butchers, bakers. We are all normal people," _he said. I translated what he'd said for the others. When I was done, he was suddenly saying something else. Something that would forever change our lives.

"_We are in here not because of what we have done, but what we are. Hitler and his Germany locked us in here because we are Jews. Poles. And gypsies. We disgrace their aristocratic Germany, so they locked us in this camp. Consider it an extermination." _I gasped, my hand flying up to my mouth. I gripped his arm tighter, not sure what to say or how to react to this new piece of information.

"Oh God," I muttered, all of the breath seeming to have left my lungs in a single moment, "They're Jews, Poles, and gypsies. Hitler placed them here to work them all to death. It's an extermination of unwanted blood in German society." I could feel the tension in the air, radiating warmly from the four men around me. But I could feel nothing but a cold dread sweeping over my body. Before the full extent of the reality of the current situation had soaked into my mind, he grabbed my hand.

"_Fraulein, the woman's camp is also somewhere near by. I believe I heard one of the guards say that it was at the next railroad stop." _My blood began to boil as I wondered how long it would take for someone to go over there as well.

"_You're sure?" _

"_Yes, I have never been more sure of anything in my life, Fraulein." _

"_Thank you so much for your help. You don't know how much this means for you all." _But he'd already begun to walk off, his eyes taking on that same glazed look as many of the others. I shuddered, trying to keep what semblance of sanity I still had left in me.

"Adie, what did he say?" Ron asked me softly, his voice coming from somewhere off to my right. I turned to look at him slowly. My lips formed a forlorn grimace.

"He said that the women's camp is up the road at the next railroad stop," I replied, my voice barely above a whisper in the wind. I shuddered at the thought of what they must have gone through. Women surrounded by lonely, often drunk, soldiers...it was never a good mix. So on top of starving and being unclean, countless men had probably taken advantage of them. That was all the incentive I needed to glance at Dick, a determination in my eyes and the stance of my shoulders that I found comforting. I had a purpose now. Getting help to those women as quickly as possible.

"Dick, I need to go. Could you spare a platoon for me?" I asked him, willing him to agree. Pleading with whoever might be listening to see reason and grant me this one thing. Dick looked down at me, his eyes probing mine as if he was looking into my very soul. Whatever he saw there brought a grim smile to his face and he nodded.

"You can take second platoon, alright. And I can spare you a truck and a jeep. As soon as you find out something, come back. We need to get all of these people food and water a.s.a.p." I nodded quickly, bending up on the tips of my toes to give him a quick hug.

"Thank you so much, Dick."

**Sorry about any errors that may be on this. Didn't have time in twenty minutes to change anything. Hope you enjoy and please review if you have the time. :)**


	35. Chapter 34

_Came up to meet ya, tell you I'm sorry_

_You don't know how lovely you are_

_I had to find you, tell you I need you_

_And tell you I set you apart_

_Tell me your secrets, and nurse me your questions_

_Oh lets go back to the start_

_~"Nobody Said it Was Easy" by Coldplay_

Adelina's POV

As compared to the first time that we'd found the men's work camp, our hearts were not pumping our bodies full of adrenaline. Our hands were not trembling out of shear, blind anticipation of the unknown.

No.

Our hearts were breaking for the state of depravity and suffering we knew we would find these women in. Our hands were trembling at the need to act, the driving instinct to help these people as soon as we could. And at the moment, the trucks could not move fast enough for any of us. When a hand landed suddenly on my knee, my head snapped up to meet the eyes of Donald Malarkey.

"Adie, you're driving me crazy with your knee. It's going about a hundred miles an hour," he said, a grim smile playing about his lips. I nodded, realizing for the first time what I had been doing out of nervous habit. I glanced around at the rest of them. Some of the guys were smoking their cigarettes. Others were staring adamantly at the bed of the truck, their eyes shining with some undefined emotion that struck fear into my heart. I knew that none of us would come out of this unscathed. But I had to wonder how much this day would affect each of us later in life. I'd been so caught up in looking at the men that when I felt the truck stutter to a stop, my head snapped up again. I could hear the soft moans on the wind and my nostrils filled with that now all too familiar stench. I was out of the back of the truck first, my boots sliding slightly under me on the rocks in my haste to escape the confines of the vehicle.

Unlike before, the women were not lined up along the fence, their fingers strained on the wire chain links. Begging with their eyes to be set free. Instead, I could set their weak and withered forms propped up against the huts. I could see the lifeless bodies thrown carelessly to the sides, gun shut wounds littering their bodies. And I noticed that no one was mourning their deaths. The faces of the women were completely and utterly devoid of any thing human. They now looked like nothing more than corpses, empty shells of who they once were. Goosebumps rose along the lengths of my arms and I suppressed a shudder as I motioned for Malarkey and Luz to unlock the gates. They did so without complaint, their faces averted from the sights before them. I wished that I could do the same, but my mind would not allow me to turn my attention away from them.

I walked slowly forward, my legs feeling like solid lead beneath me. That is until I saw her. Even from this distance, I could see her blue eyes staring at me. A look of such sorrow that it nearly brought me to my knees from the sheer power of it. Something in the back of my mind stirred as I edged closer. Her dull brown hair, matted from not brushing it, framed her bony face. Her skin was pulled tight over her visible skeleton, its color a sickly yellow. And as I finally got to her eyes again, I gasped in horror. Those blue eyes were so familiar that a wave of pain ripped its way through my chest.

"Sarah?!" I muttered, my mind taking me back to the last day that I'd ever seen her. Long hidden emotions rose to the surface and I lost all grip on reality that I'd had. Kneeling down by her small form, I pulled her into my lap. Rocking her softly back and forth, I ran my hand in a soothing rhythm up and down her back.

"_Adelina, I'm so glad we're together again." _A labored chuckle made its way past my lips as I held her tighter. With a suppressed sob, the tears leaked slowly one by one from my eyes.

"I'm glad too, sweetheart. I missed you so much. And I'm so sorry that I let daddy take you away from me," I whispered in her ear, laying soft kisses along her cheeks and forehead. I couldn't help but notice the quick, rapid tempo of her heartbeat. Or her labored breathing or the way her tiny body trembled helplessly against mine. I tried to put it out of my mind, determined to believe that finally we would be together again.

"_I know it wasn't your fault, Adie. Besides, if I hadn't died, then you never would have met Easy Company. And I know how much they all mean to you." _My forehead crinkled in confusion. How could she know about Easy? Unexpectedly, my fingers wound themselves around her fragile arms.

"Sarah, how do you know about Easy? You couldn't know about them," I said, my eyes searching hers frantically. What sort of tricks was my mind playing on me now?

"_Adie, I have to go now, but I'll be waiting for you here. I love you," _her beautiful voice was fading with every syllable. It only made me grasp her body harder to mine.

"No, Sarah!" I shouted hysterically, tears pouring in hot torrents from my eyes and falling into her hair and onto our bodies, "Don't leave me again. Please." My heart was breaking in two again. I could do nothing to stop the onslaught of pulsating waves of pain from washing over me. I became aware of two strong pairs of hands trying to pry her lifeless body from me. I thrashed wildly, my eyes filling with a vibrant determination that made the men around me step back from a moment.

"You can't take her away from me. Not again," I said, my attention sliding down to her face again. And then I noticed it. The sickening realization settled on me like a dead weight. This was not Sarah. This was a nameless stranger that I had pulled into my lap. Cradling her like a small child as I called her by my sister's name. Disgust with myself filled the very essence of my being and I let Don pull me to my feet. Silently, he half-dragged me back through the gates of this hell on Earth. I was only partially aware of what he was doing to me. One side of me wanted to wrench away from his grasp and go running back toward the death and the suffering. Another side of me didn't care at all where he took me.

"Adie, we just got word. Sink wants us to lock the gates back up until we figure out what to do with them," Don told me quietly. I could hear the sound of the gates being locked again to prove the weight in his words. That's when something inside of me suddenly broke through. I pushed Don away from me. I could feel my eyes light up again in my fury.

"Lock them back up?! We can't do this," I nearly screamed, my legs moving beneath me even though I'd never consciously decided to run back to the gates.

"Adie, we don't like it anymore than you do, but we have to follow orders. You know that," Don said as he followed me. I could feel his fingers closing around my hand, but I pulled it away from him.

"We can't do this," I repeated, my lips quivering and my legs crumbling underneath me as the passionate energy drained out of me. I shuddered, wrapping my arms around my torso.

"Adie," Don muttered, pleading with me to see reason. I couldn't see reason though. Nothing mattered anymore but staying exactly where I was, Sink's orders be damned.

"Leave me alone. I'll be fine. I'm not moving until these people are taken care of, Don." I could feel some of the others gathering around me too. Luz's genial face swam into view. He laid a hand gently on my cheek, his thumbs caressing my bare skin. The worry in his eyes was almost enough to break my resolve.

"Adie, come back with us. Sitting out here all alone isn't going to solve anything. And Speirs will kill us if we come back without you." At the mention of Ron's name, I set off like a firecracker again. I smacked Luz's hand away, earning a look from him and the others.

"I don't give a damn, Luz. Now leave me the hell alone or so help me I'll shoot the next one of you who tries to sway me," I shouted at them threateningly. The tension in the air was palpable and it sent shudders of self-hatred down my spine to know that I had been so cruel to them. But I knew that I wasn't myself at all right now. It scared me and I knew that whatever I had unleashed within myself, I had to deal with on my own. Luz was the first to move. He nodded, the hurt in his eyes evident.

"Come on fellas. You heard the lady," he said quietly. I felt them walking away, but I didn't dare look at any of them.

A few minutes later, I heard the roar of engines and listened anxiously as the noise faded into the distance. I closed my eyes, wishing whatever monster was dwelling within me to take over. And it did.

Speirs' POV

I walked as calmly as I could to the makeshift post office on the other side of town with the treasures gripped tightly between my fingers. But my thoughts were not with my wife and my child. They were completely consumed by Adelina. As I entered the post office, the men who were just leaving scurried quickly out of my way. I wondered at the fact that I was so distracted that I couldn't really appreciate the sense of satisfaction I got from their fear of me.

I set the tray filled with random objects of value that I'd found around town on the counter. Out of the corner, I saw Vest approaching me, looking apprehensive yet trying to hide it all the same.

"Do you have a box all this stuff will fit into?" I asked, tossing two packs of cigarettes in with the goods. Vest caught my eye and nodded hurriedly.

"Yes, sir, I think I can scrounge something up,"he told me. I turned around, slapping the corner as I did so.

"Thanks, Vest," I said, surprising even myself. I never said thank you to anyone unless it was...God why wouldn't thoughts of the woman leave my mind already?

"Um, Captain Speirs?" came a small voice behind me. Resisting the urge to roll my eyes, I turned around and regarded the timid Private with a blank stare. I could see the way his Adam's Apple bobbed in his anxiety.

"Uh, you want these sent to the same location, sir?" Distractedly, I nodded carelessly. And without waiting for him to say anything else, I left.

I knew why I was so preoccupied with Adelina at the moment. I'd seen the way she was looking at the prisoners. I'd been watching her eyes widen in utter fear as the German told her why they were really locked up. And I couldn't help but worry about the way she might be taking the women's camp. I wished for nothing more than to snag a jeep and drive out there right now. I looked over my right shoulder and noticed the way the sun was hugging the horizon. I glanced down at my watch, surprised that the day had wasted away so fast. I decided right then and there that if she hadn't come back in five minutes, I was going out there. I couldn't stand the way my stomach was tied into painful knots or the way my hands were shaking for the want to feel her flesh against my own.

Whatever had transpired between us over the last two days was enough to have my mind spinning for weeks. I knew that as long as she would allow me to stay by her side, I would remain there. Until she told me to leave, I would be there. Seeing her so close to death, holding her in my arms as the warmth fled from her body...It had changed something in me. Everything had been burned away except the need to make things right between us.

My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the arrival of a jeep and a truck. I turned my eyes toward them, noting at once that they were the men with whom Adie had gone to the women's camp with. I started forward, my fingers already itching to pull her fragile body close to mine. However, as I watched all of them file out, my heart raced faster and faster. Because she was not there. Worried and furious, I lunged forward and caught one of the soldiers by the lapels of his uniform.

"Where the hell is she? Tell me you didn't leave her out there all alone," I growled, the emotions rising like poison in my system blocking out every rational thought in my mind. I could feel my fingers constricting around his neck and I had to fight against the monster within me to loosen my hold on the man.

"Sir, she wouldn't come back with us."

"We tried. Malarkey tried, but we couldn't get through to her, Captain." I could see the fear in all of their eyes that I would strangle the man to death. When I let him go with a dark chuckle, I saw the relief raging in each of them.

"Yes, well I guess you didn't try hard enough," I remarked as I moved toward the jeep. Without looking back at them, I jumped into the driver's seat and started the ignition. My foot couldn't pound hard enough into the gas pedal. I was going much too slow for my taste, but I knew that going the rest of the way on foot wouldn't do any good either. I willed myself to calm down, taking in deep breaths and attempting to think of anything but Adie. Alone in the woods with no one to protect her. A blind rage waged wars in my brain. I wanted to kill the men-_my _men- for leaving her. But I knew that I wouldn't. I couldn't unless I wanted to be killed myself. That was something I could not afford. Not now that things finally seemed to be settling between Adie and me.

Finally, I found what I was looking for. By now, the moon was rising in the sky. It's milky rays shined down on me, lighting the way to her. I rushed forward, my entire body shaking with the need to pull her into my arms.

"Adie," I called, hoping that she would respond and that whatever had kept her here would fade away for just a moment. But no reply came. It worried me, and I hated feeling that way about her. I moved faster and faster until out of the shadows, the sight of her filled my vision.

"Adie," I said, sighing in relief. I continued toward her, aware that she still had not responded to my voice. I felt the flames of madness stroke my breast. What was wrong with her? What had happened to close her off from the world? From me?

When I got close enough to her, I wrapped her in my arms and pressed her to my chest. Still, she did not respond to me. Sighing resignedly, I picked her up and carried her to the jeep. I set her in the passenger seat, not being able to help myself when my fingers slid carefully along her hidden waist when I pulled away. It took me a moment to get into the driver's seat and turn on the vehicle. Silently, I drove, leaving the death and suffering far behind. At last, I pulled the jeep off the road and shut off the engine. When I glanced over at her again, I noticed that her eyes still held that empty, glazed look. I got out and crossed around to the other side. As gently as I could, I picked her up again and carried her a short distance away from the road. I sat her down, wondering how in the world I was going to go about fixing her now.

"Adie, baby, please talk to me. Why didn't you come back with the others?" I whispered, kneeling beside her and taking her hand in mine. Her skin held an iciness I hadn't noticed before. I turned my eyes to her face. Seeing the lack of awareness there, I knew that she had retreated somewhere deep within herself. I traced the outlines of dried tears that ran down the length of her ivory-colored face. I reached out a hand, gently moving her curls behind her ear so that I could see her face better. When I did that, her eyes closed and a soft, almost inaudible, whimper fell from her angelic lips. I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her into my lap. She allowed me to do this, her small hands working their way around my neck.

I could her the soft sobs making their way through her chest and past her lips. I hugged her more tightly to my own body, wishing I knew how to make her sorrow disappear.

"Ron...." she whispered in a voice so sweet that it made tears come to my eyes. Knots twisted themselves in my stomach, pain shooting through my chest at the sound of my name falling from her lips.

"What is it baby?" She trembled in my arms. Her hands tightened their grip on the front of my uniform and I felt her tears brush softly against my neck.

"I h-have something t-to tell you," she muttered between sobs. I pressed a kiss to her temple.

"You can tell me anything, sweetheart," I assured her, making sure that everything I felt for her was in that one, simple statement. My heart was racing in my chest, almost as if it wanted to break free. My palms were moist against the rough material of her uniform. Even in a moment as this, I wanted nothing more than to remove her clothing and lay skin to skin with her. My pants tightened in response to the images racing through my mind. I shook my head, weakly trying to dispel the inappropriate thoughts from my head.

"I don't even know where to start."

"Just start at the beginning, love."

"Okay," she said, sounding more like a little girl than the strong woman I knew her to be. A shuddering breath shook its way through her small frame, shifting something within my own chest.

"It all started one day when I was still spying on the Germans. A-about a year and a half ago now. There was a German officer..." she trailed off, her eyes filling to the brim as memories filled with torment filled her expression. For a moment, I thought she would not continue, but then she squared her shoulders and set her mouth into a tight frown. My heart leapt with joy when I realized that her passionate determination to stay strong despite her troubling past was shining through her again.

"The German officer-his name was Fleischer. And one day I guess he just got it in his head that he-he wanted me. At first he was really nice to me. I was too naive and stupid to realize what he was really doing. Being behind enemy lines was difficult and I felt like the only person I could really be myself with was him. And one day he found me crying in my room and things just sort of happened. Before I knew what was really going on, he was taking my clothes off. This primal, hungry look appeared in his eyes; it was the most terrifying thing I'd ever seen. When I tried to push him away, he wouldn't budge. He pinned me harder against the bed. He took me as his own that night. And what made it all the more horrible was that he was married with two beautiful children at home. I couldn't understand why he would r-rape me if he had such a wonderful family waiting for him in Germany." Her voice faded into the crisp night air, leaving me feeling empty and so disgusted with myself that I couldn't do anything but look away from her. I was ashamed with myself as the puzzle pieces suddenly fell into place. Now I could understand why she had pushed me away so hard. Self-loathing filled the deepest cracks of my soul and my shoulders sank with the weight of this new information. Instead of the anger or hurt that I'd expected from her keeping this from me, there was only the fury that I felt for myself. That and the undeniable impulse that I felt to find the man who had poisoned her mind forever. I wanted nothing more than to find him and rip him limb from limb. I wanted to make him feel the pain that he had caused in the woman that I loved.

But as soon as I did that, I felt the way she tensed against me. Her muscles were bunched into a knot so tight that it was a wonder that she could still find the flexibility to flee from my grasp.

"Adie, what..." my voice trailed away as I took in the sight of fresh tears running down her face. Scared out of mind, I ran forward and tried to pull her into my arms. She pushed away from me gently and I knew that if I'd really wanted to, I could keep her with me by force. I was done with doing that to her though. Bending her to my will and making decisions for her.

"Adie, what's wrong, baby?" I asked, more confused than ever by her behavior. She turned so fast toward me that I was left feeling lightheaded. She plunged a finger into my chest, her eyes burning with something I couldn't identify. It was frightening to see the change that came over her and-I couldn't deny-it made my pants tighten uncomfortably.

"You are my problem, Ron. It's been killing me for months and months that I hadn't told you yet. And come to find out that it just made you push me away again," she said, pushing closer to me in her anger. Then, as suddenly as it had appeared, the anger was gone from her eyes. Leaving her looking alone and more sorrowful than I had ever seen her. She wrapped her arms around herself as she sank to the ground.

"I thought you'd changed. I thought you would understand," she whispered so softly that I was almost mistaken of what I had heard. My heart wrenched painfully when the realization of what she was saying settled into my brain.

She believed that I had turned away from her because I didn't want her anymore.

"Adie," I said, grabbing her hands and pulling her to my chest again. She struggled only a little, but she came quietly as I placed a tender kiss to her lips, "Baby, I'm disgusted with myself not you. I never understood why you fought with me so hard about this-about us being together. But I see now and I just want you to know that I'm going to try to be better for you. I want to be deserving of you." I heard her shaky chuckle against my neck.

"You're being awfully poetic you know," she said quietly, playing gently with the hairs at the nape of my neck. I couldn't help the shiver that rolled down my spine or the way my muscles bunched together.

"Would you rather I went back to a cold hearted bastard again?" I asked her, a smirk curling the sides of my lips to the sky. I could feel her curls brush against my jaw as she shook her head. She huddled closer to my chest, her laughter quieting to nothing more than a whisper of air that surrounded us.

I don't know how long we sat there. My fingers weaved through her soft hair and my nose breathed her in hungrily as the moments trickled past. The moon bathed our bodies in its glowing white light. The wind blew gently against us, creating the need to huddle closer to conserve body heat.

A soft whisper moved through the silence to my ear, "Ron?" She pulled away from me far enough to look up into my face. The devastating vulnerability I saw there was breathtaking. For the hundredth time since we'd met, I wondered why life couldn't be simpler for us. I gulped down the lump that had risen in my throat.

"Yes?" Her tiny fingers came up to cradle my cheeks. Her soft skin against the stubble of my beard was an intoxicating sensation and my eyes closed weakly.

"You do realize what the baby means don't you?" she asked, her voice shaking with unwept tears. I nodded, unable to speak because of what I feared she would say.

"I would never ask you to leave your wife and your child for me after all this over. But," hope filled me when I realized what she was about to say. Or at least I wished I knew what she was going to say, "for now, can we be together? I can't stand being apart from you anymore."

"Of course we can," I muttered, my eyes still closed. I felt her slump against me and then something in the world seemed to settle. Something within me settled as I picked her up again. I walked slowly to the jeep, my mind turning over the events of the past few days. After all the heart ache and sleepless nights, we had finally come to an understanding. I couldn't help but wonder how long it would last.

**Okay, just a little note that I know will make you all very very sad. :( I just completed chapter 35 and it's 18 pages and like two sentences long. Wondering why it's so long? Well it's the last official chapter thats why. And before you all get in an uproar, I'm going to be posting an epilogue so never fear. Though it probably won't be 18 pages. Acutally, it probably won't even get to my usual 8 pages. **

**Anyway, so I need you guys to tell me if you want 35 in two parts. Or if you'd be cool with just posting the whole thing. Just send in your thoughts in a review or PM me. Thanks a lot guys. Love you all. :)**


	36. Chapter 35

_Last time we talked the night that I walked _

_Burns like an iron in the back of my mind_

_I must've been high to say you and I_

_Weren't meant to be and just wasting' my time_

_Oh why did I ever doubt you?_

_You know I would die here without you_

_~ "Life After You" by Daughtry_

Adelina's POV

The sunlight streaming through the windows made me groan and flip over on my side. What I hadn't been expecting was for my arm to encounter a warm, bare chest. My mind was reeling as I nearly screamed. Then a strong arm wound its way around my waist and pulled me to a familiar body. I relaxed instantly, pressing my face into Ron's neck.

"You okay?" he asked, his voice still husky with sleep. I couldn't help the jolt that rushed through my chest and made shivers roll down my spine. My throat constricted as I tried my hardest not to let my desires override my thoughts. It was difficult though when I felt his muscles bunch together to form a rock solid wall beneath my fingers.

"Adie? Were you going to stare at my chest all morning?" Ron said, his chuckle rumbling through him and making him vibrate against me. I felt the heat pooling in my cheeks. I glanced away from him for a moment before staring up into his eyes. They were full of desire, something that was doing nothing to damper the same feeling that was radiating through my mind. But I found that I couldn't look away from him.

The events of last night were still fresh in my mind. Something between us had changed. We were at a crossroads, the point of no return. I had no idea what was going to happen when the war finally did come to a close, but for now, I wanted him. All of him even at the cost of damaging myself beyond repair once we did part ways. At least he had his wife and his child to go home to. I closed my eyes, willing the painful thoughts to leave my mind. It was then that I became aware of his warm fingers playing along the slender length of my neck. A small moan escaped my lips and I arched into him, my head falling back to grant him more access. My arms wrapped slowly, rhythmically, around his neck. Pulling our bodies flush against each other. All thoughts of his awaiting family drifted from my thoughts, my entire attention being consumed by the sensation of his lips on mine.

This kiss was different than any that we had ever shared. It was more intense somehow. More hungry, more enrapturing than before. Our entwined lips held the promise of forever, but at the same time neither of us knew how long this could last between us. The end of the war was the end of the suffering of millions, but for us, it was only the beginning of a lifetime full of heartache. I knew that Ron wouldn't abandon his family now. That wasn't the type of person he was and as much as it would hurt me, I knew that I loved him all the more for it.

He pulled away first, his chest heaving inward and outward from the breathtaking kiss. His eyes were on fire, shining through and through with something so powerful that I could feel fear strike my heart. Fear of leaving him and letting him leave me. I cupped his cheeks, knowing full well what he must have been thinking.

"I love you, Ron," I whispered, my body melting completely into his as he flipped us over. I was on my back, the bare skin of my thighs soaking in the coolness of the sheets as compared to his body heat. And as I felt myself succumbing to the cliff of ecstasy, there was a loud knock on the door.

The spell broken, his forehead fell against my shoulder. He growled, cursing under his breath at whoever had interrupted us. I giggled, running my hands through his hair.

"We can always finish this later," I muttered, smiling despite the fact that I was probably just as mad as he was. Ron lifted his head so he could look at me.

"Now how in the hell will I be able to concentrate on whatever this idiot wants when I have that promise to look forward to?" he asked, a smirk brightening his expression. I felt my heart began to race and my blood boiled in my veins. I shrugged playfully, planting a small kiss on his lips.

"I'm sure you'll find a way," I said as he crossed the room to the door. Throwing it open, I saw George Luz standing on the other side. His cheeks reddened as he caught sight of me sitting on the bed. But he was quick to turn all of his attention back to Ron.

"Captain Speirs, Major Winters wanted me to tell you that we'll be leaving in an hour for Berchtesgaden." Ron ran a hand hastily through his hair, glancing over his shoulder at me.

"Alright, thank you, Luz."

"Oh, and sir?" Luz asked, his eyes suddenly shining with something even I could see.

"What is it?"

"Hitler's dead, sir. Shot himself apparently." Ron turned back to me, his eyes mirroring the shock I felt. Somewhere under all the shock, the fear was creeping up on me. With Hitler dead, how long would it be before the war in Europe was over?

_Berchtesgaden, Germany_

I stretched backwards against the hood of the jeep, willing the tension in my body to relax. We'd been waiting here for a full hour, waiting for the engineers to arrive. It didn't help that my mind was already doing circles about the fact that time was quickly running out for Ron and me. I knew it was only a matter of time before the war in Europe came to an end. It was easy to forget that there was still an enemy waiting in the wings to destroy everything we'd worked so hard to stop in Europe. And as the close of the war on this continent loomed ever closer, so the ending of our relationship crawled nearer with every breath. It was only a matter of time before Easy would be called upon to fight in the Pacific. I also had a feeling that no matter how well I had proven myself to be in combat situations, there was no way that I would be able to go with them. They would go and I would be left behind, something that I hadn't been so terrified of in almost a year.

I shook my head, jolting my thoughts back to the present. The SS was staging a guerrilla resistance against the allied advance. The first step: blocking the roads to the Eagle's Nest, a complication which had us all on edge. Even Dick, who was normally calm in these types of situations, was mimicking my pose, frustration pouring from him with a single sigh.

"When were we expecting the engineers to arrive, Nix?"

Lew scoffed, "Half an hour ago." Dick and I shook our heads in disbelief.

"So we're stuck here until they march their happy arses up here to rescue us?" I asked. I became aware of him even before he had the chance to speak. A brooding flame awoke within me, licking every inch of my skin until I was burning with desire.

"Not if Easy has anything to do with it," Ron said, running his hand lightly over mine as he passed me, "If you need to find a way up that mountain, sir, Easy Company is ready and willing." Dick smirked at him, the light flickering softly in his eyes. I could see the challenge it was to remain neutral towards each other. Even if Dick understood when he'd been beaten, it didn't lessen the pain of the blow. And Ron, for some unfathomable reason, was still unsure of where he stood in my affections. I could tell by the way he held me at night and the way he looked into my eyes whenever I left him. I rolled my eyes at the both of them, convinced that men were only here to serve one purpose: to annoy me to no end.

"Dully noted, Speirs. I already recommended you to Colonel Sink." Ron glanced at me, then back at Dick.

"Excellent, let's go find out where Hitler lived." I jumped off the jeep, ready to go after him.

"Ron!" Dick shouted after him, as if he'd just remembered something, "We still don't know what's up there. The Colonel doesn't want us taking any unnecessary risks." Ron sighed, shaking his head in aggravation as he glared at the ground.

"So the French are gonna beat us there, then?" I heard the sound of a jeep approaching and looked to my right just in time to see the good Colonel's jeep pull up next to us. Ron stepped back, the tightness in his eyes the only indicator that he was angry. I could understand his feelings. We'd been waiting for this moment for nearly a month. Hell the lot of them had probably been dreaming of this since they signed up. Now that it was so close, I couldn't imagine anyone but us setting foot in the Eagle's Nest first.

Colonel Sink's next words were lost on me as I met Ron's gaze. His dark eyes were two celestial pools of darkness. Simple to get lost in them and impossible to claw your way back out. And the smile on his face...what I wouldn't give to look at that for the rest of my life. The pain in my chest, a constant presence for the past two days, heightened. I wanted nothing more than to fall to the ground and curl up in a fetal position. It didn't matter that I knew I couldn't. It didn't matter that I wouldn't.

How had I come so far? Five years ago, I couldn't have imagined feeling this way for another person. And after what Fleischer had done to me, I'd given up hope on loving anyone. I was a wreck, ruined for all eternity for any men who might have wanted a chance with me. Yet somehow, Ron had gotten under my skin. He'd buried himself so far inside my very soul that I knew not a day would go by that I wouldn't think about him in the years to come.

I bit my lip as a calloused hand closed around my own. I gasped, looking up into those same eyes that I'd just been thinking about.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked, the very essence of his soul brushing against mine as he gazed into the depths of my eyes. I shook my head, barely managing a smile.

"You'll never know, Ron," I said playfully. I pecked him once on the lips before tugging on his hand.

"I'm guessing Sink just told us to outflank the French bastard that's trying to take the Eagle's Nest before us?" I asked him, grinning from ear to ear. Ron smirked, an action that heated my body in more ways than one.

"Well he actually said French son of a bitch, but I think bastard works just as well." I giggled, savoring the feeling that passed through my body. Ron's arm snaked around my waist and he pulled me into a hasty hug before letting go of me.

"I want you up here with Dick," he told me, his voice husky in my ear. I shuddered even as fear and anger rippled through me. At the look on my face, Ron cupped my cheeks with his strong hands.

"Like Dick said we have no idea what's up there, Adie. I..." his voice faded slightly and for the first time in a long time he seemed at a loss for words. His eyes searched my own pleadingly, willing me to figure out what he was trying to say on my own. When I didn't say anything, he sighed heavily, "I just-I nearly lost you once and I'm not willing to take that chance again. I trust Dick to protect you if anything should happen." I could see the sincerity in his expression and it broke my heart to see him look so vulnerable. I could only imagine what he would be like when I left. I closed my eyes, willing the tears to vanish. But they spilled onto my cheeks anyway. Ron brushed them away hastily and kissed my lips once more. It was soft, almost hesitant. Though it did hold a sense of urgency, as if subconsciously, he too knew how limited our time together was becoming. With that he was gone, leaving me feeling empty and alone. I contented myself with the fact that I hadn't even begun to feel the agony of his absence in my life.

_***_

Ron was driving the jeep, silently eying the landscape before us. Rolling hills seemed to provide a steep staircase up to the goal of our journey. The Eagle's Nest. I could see now why Hitler considered it one of the crowning jewels of his empire.

Up ahead of us, I could see some of the guys that had decided to run up the mountain. I could hear the others shouting at them. But the only thing I could really focus on was the feeling of Ron's fingers as they caressed the palm of my hand. Every cell and fiber of my body was aware of him and only him. This was what I would miss the most. Those silent moments that stretched into eternity as he memorized the planes of my body. In a way, we learned more about each other in this fashion than talking. I felt connected to him, bonded in more than one way by more than just physical intimacy. I hungered for his mind just as much as I lusted for his body.

The jolt of the jeep beneath me pulled my mind immediately from my thoughts and I pulled my hand away from him as the heat rose in my cheeks. I stayed in my seat as he crossed around the side of the jeep and grasped my hand.

"Come on," he said, jerking his head toward the Nest, which was standing like a monument in front of us. I looked between him and the building, not sure of what to think. I knew by the look in his eyes how hard this was for him. Trying to give me a choice instead of making me stay behind. After all, no one knew if there were still people in there. Who knew what evil was waiting behind those doors for us. But the fact that he was making an honest effort to change, to be better for me, meant more to me than I could tell him. So, I took his hand and let him lead me to the front doors. Grasping my fingers tightly in his left hand, he pulled his pistol out of its holster with his right. He motioned for the men there to open the doors, which they did with an eager almost happy gleam in their eyes. We'd waited for this for a long time, so I didn't blame them for being a little on edge.

Malarkey and Grant led the way through the winding hallways. I wondered at the simpleness of what we had seen so far. No extravagant statues chiseled in Hitler's image. No grandiose paintings or rare and expensive items placed throughout the building. That is until we entered what appeared to be a meeting room. I gaped at the fireplace and the expensive rug beneath our feet. I ran my hands wonderingly over the richly-colored mahogany tables. When Ron saw my expression, he chuckled.

"I'll buy you a table like that someday, Adie," he said before crossing the room, his eyes darting every which way for any sign of the enemy. Meanwhile, his words had halted my legs. I stopped walking, frozen mind, body, and soul to the spot. I couldn't believe that after all that had happened between us, Ron still believed that we could be together. I wanted, more than anything, for things to be like that for us. However, as my thoughts traveled to his child and his wife, I knew it wasn't possible. Not now and not ever. He wouldn't abandon them and I would never ask him to.

I was brought sharply back to reality by the sound of a cork being popped from a bottle. Holding in a scream that seemed to swell in my throat, I jumped backward into the table I'd been looking at. Ron looked over his shoulder at me, pausing only to glare at Malarkey, who was holding up a bottle of Hitler's wine.

"Here's to him," Malarkey said with a smile on his face, gesturing toward what I knew must have been a dead body lying at Ron's feet. Ron rolled his eyes and crossed the room toward me. He took my hand and started walking toward the passageway that branched off to the left of this room. I felt my heart contract painfully when I realized that this was the first time we were going to be alone for a long time. Higher and higher we climbed, neither of us daring to interrupt the silent chorus blaring between us. The tension in the air was palpable and made me wonder what on Earth was about to happen to us. Would it make it easier or harder to bear the thought of me leaving him?

I had my answer when we arrived on the balcony. The sight before me took my breath away. Sprawled out on either side of us were snow-capped peaks. The crisp morning air filled my lungs with a kind of hope, the feeling that things would be alright between us after all. With an effort, I turned my attention back to Ron. His hands slithered up my arms to cup my cheeks. The pads of his thumbs brushed lightly against my cheekbones, the sensation making my heart pound with anticipation. I didn't dare close my eyes for fear that I would miss that spark in his eyes as he bent his head to mine. He pressed his forehead to mine, his warm breath blowing in thin tendrils against my skin. I shuddered in his arms, slightly afraid of the mounting desire inside of me. Fiery liquid sprang forth, running like a poison through my veins and pooling in the junction between my thighs. I arched into him, a natural reaction to the emotions he was stirring up within me. And if the primal growl that wound its way up his throat was any indication, I was doing the same things to him. I closed my eyes as I tilted my face upwards. Our lips were nearly touching, the vibrations from his skin sending a wave of pleasure through me.

Before we had the chance to close the distance between us, the room was filled with Lipton, Dick, Nix, and Harry. Ron jumped away from me, something close to embarrassment rising in his cheeks. I stuck my hands in my pockets to keep them from shaking, knowing all the while that my shameful expression would give me away anyway.

"Not interrupting anything are we?" Nix muttered as he walked past me. I fought the urge to kick his legs from beneath him, knowing that it would only make his infamous smirk grow even larger. Harry, Lipton, and Nixon all took seats on the chairs that I only just now realized were set on the balcony. Harry's left hand was wrapped tightly around the neck of a bottle of wine and I chuckled softly.

"Already getting into the wine I see, Harry."

"Of course. Pickings have been slim for a while now and I intend to enjoy this while I have the chance," Harry said in reply, taking a long gulp from the bottle before passing it into Nixon's hand. Dick sighed, giving me a long hard look before turning his eyes back to the others.

"Alright, I've got some news for you guys," Dick started, a smile already erupting on his face, "Just came in from Colonel Sink." We all fastened our eyes on him, each of us wondering if we were about to be ripped away from the paradise we'd only just found.

"All troops stand fast on present positions," he read aloud. Harry stood up and feigned a position of attention. He started laughing, the wine in his system showing through. Dick smiled wickedly, raising his eyebrows at his friends' behavior.

"You wanna hear it?" Harry nodded quickly, a goofy smile still on his face. I glanced over at Ron, who was looking adamantly at everything but me.

"Okay, ready? Listen up," Dick said, clapping Harry lightly on the shoulder, "German Army's just surrendered." My heart fell into my stomach and the pain radiated through my chest. My lips trembled while the weight of Dick's words pressed down on my with a force I couldn't begin to comprehend. How things could change so drastically in only a matter of seconds I would never know. Numbness spread through me as I realized what exactly this meant and I fell lightly against the wall as my legs went limp.

"Oh God," I whispered, my fingers twisting painfully in on themselves. My nails were pressing so hard against my skin I knew I was drawing blood. I lifted one of my arms, opening my fist with an effort. Half-moon slivers ran in a line along my palm, droplets of blood forming on each of them. As I zeroed in on those ruby-colored circles, blackness crept into my vision from all sides. I blinked. A second poised in the vast expanse of time. And then I passed out.

Ron's POV

I turned, expecting to see her smiling face looking back at me. Her green eyes sparkling like emeralds in the faint sunlight pouring down us on the balcony. My body yearned for a her touch. I wanted more than anything to celebrate this day, this moment in history, with her.

However, when I turned around, I wasn't greeted with her smiling eyes. Instead, she was slumped against the wall. Her small body was trembling under the weight of some horror that had taken hold of her, something I somehow knew she wouldn't discuss with me until it was too late. I knew she was hiding something from me. I could see it in her eyes sometimes when she believed I wasn't looking. It was heart breaking, but I knew the quickest way to make it worse would be to confront her about it. So, I was content to live in what she thought was blissful ignorance. At least for now.

I rushed forward, scooping her up into my arms and burying my face into her neck. The soft curls that framed her face brushed against my cheek.

"Adie," I whispered into her ear, tracing comforting patterns into the small of her back. I'd forgotten we still had an audience.

"Hey, lovebirds! Get a room," Harry yelled at me from a short distance away. I threw a look over my shoulder, winking as I began to walk away.

"Thanks for the suggestion, Harry. I think we just might," I said, laughing at the expression that came over his boyish face. I always did get a kick out of the fact that no one seemed to believe that Adie would want to be with me. I found it even funnier that they couldn't stand the thought of the two of us having sex. I chuckled quietly to myself, cradling Adie's soft body closer to my own. I could feel the warmth of her breath fan across my face and I looked down at her, wondering how on Earth I'd gotten so lucky as to have her in my life. That's when I felt it.

That assurance that as long as she was in my arms-in my life-nothing could go wrong. I knew that with her by my side, I could face anything including my wife. I wondered briefly if that was what had put the sorrow in Adie's eyes. However, the thought was a whisper in my mind of darker things to come. And instead of acknowledging it, I locked it away in the deepest cavern of my brain.

***

_Austria, 1945_

Adelina's POV

I bit back my laughter as Grant, Malarkey, Bull, and Liebgott faced off at a game of cards. Bull was winning, there was no doubt about it. The other three players were not giving up though.

"You boys should fold while you're ahead," I said, making Bull's chest rumble with the force of his laughter.

"She's right ya know," Bull remarked, as he set down his hands in front of them. Liebgott was the first one to throw down his cards and jump up from his seat.

"I ain't playing cards with you anymore, Bull. I meant it," he yelled as he stalked off. I giggled now, the hilarity of Liebgott's words making me grab my sides as the pain ripped through them. He'd be back. We all knew it. I caught Bull's eye as he grabbed the money in the pot. He threw a wink my way before stowing all the bills in his pockets. My eyes slid to the ground as did my smile.

It was one of the few times that we were all together. I couldn't believe how much had changed in the last month. As I'd suspected, the Pacific was a looming darkness on the edge of our horizons. And even though Easy did not have a date yet, we all knew that soon they would find themselves in the Pacific fighting a new enemy. I shuddered to think how many friends this new front would take from me. I glanced at all the young, peaceful faces and tried to store that image in my memory. If they died, I wanted to remember them as they were right now. I wanted to remember that if I ever thought about them, not the way they had died.

They'd been doing close-order drills and rifle-ranges. Six mile runs all through the Austrian countryside. I'd ran with them most of the time. Sometimes, unfortunately, I'd been needed at the aid station. Even though the war was over, men were still being wounded whether by their own stupidity or someone else's. One thing I was certain of: the men had too much time and alcohol on their hands to really be thinking straight at all these days.

"Adie!" someone over my shoulder yelled for me. I jumped slightly, unnerved that I'd managed to become so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I had been ignoring Luz. I turned in my chair, giving a small smile before crossing the room to be closer to him.

"Sorry, Luz. What do you need?" Luz lifted an eyebrow at me but decided to say nothing to me. He grabbed my hand and started pulling me out the door.

"Well, sweetheart, Sink wanted you in his office ten minutes ago. When I saw him he wasn't happy about it either." I clapped a hand to my forehead. I kissed Luz on the cheek before running off in the direction of Regimental HQ.

"Thanks, Luz!" I called quickly over my shoulder, not bothering to spare a backward glance.

"You're welcome." I grinned helplessly as my legs pounded beneath me. I thanked God that they had continued to let me wear men's ODs. Otherwise, I would never have been able to run this fast. In a matter of minutes, I skidded to a halt in front of the door. Taking a moment to smooth my hair and slow down my heart rate, I finally grabbed the handle of the door and pulled it open. The man at the desk gave me a critical look before standing up and walking toward me.

"Adelina Jones?" he asked, his tone friendly enough. I could detect the hint of skepticism, something I got from some people still. After all the time I'd been with Easy, it still wasn't enough for some to see that I could handle myself in combat. Hell I'd been in this war longer than the entire American military. Sighing, I decided to let it go. All that mattered was that I'd gained the respect of Easy, the men I worked with on a daily basis.

He took my quickly by the elbow and led me past a few closed doors before stopping in front of Sink's office.

"Now, I just thought I would warn you...He's angry. I don't know what about, but just try to stay on his good side." I nodded, my fingers shaking slightly. What could have possibly gotten him so riled up that even a complete stranger was warning me?

I knocked on the door, the noise permeating the silence of the hallway and resounding with a deafening roar in my ears. A silent moment passed, the only noise the ringing in my own ears to chase away the fear now pounding through me.

"Come in," Sink's gruff voice came muffled through the thick slab of wood. I gulped audibly, the muscles in my throat working to hold everything I had in my stomach down. For some reason I had the feeling that this meeting had everything to do with what I'd been fearing. My trembling fingers closed around the handle on the door, twisting it gently until the door opened to reveal Colonel Sink. He was hunched over his desk, a piece of paper grasped so tightly in his hand I was surprised it hadn't been reduced to dust.

"You wanted to see me, sir?" I asked him, terrified of breaking his silent seething but even more so of not saying anything. When his head snapped up and his icy gaze met mine, I could see in them something akin to resentment. I wondered if it was directed at me or whomever the paper had come from. After a frozen second, I had my answer. His eyes softened and he motioned me inside the room.

"Close the door, Miss Jones," Sink said, his voice more gentle than I'd ever heard it. I took the seat in front of his desk, not entirely sure what I should be thinking. My hands were shaking again and I clapped them together to relieve some of it.

We stared at each other, his eyes searching my face for something, anything. At least, he sighed and looked again at the paper crushed in his hand.

"Miss Jones, how long have you been a part of Easy?" Sink asked me quietly. I knew from the lack of surprise on my part that I'd secretly been expecting the question. I took a moment to think.

"Well, sir, I'd say it's been about a year now," I replied, making sure to keep my voice from shaking. Deep down, I knew exactly what that sheet of paper was about. I just didn't want to accept it just yet.

"You've grown quite attached to them haven't you, Adelina?"

"Yes, sir," I said, my voice reflecting nothing that I was feeling. If he was using my first name, I knew this had to be bad. Sink sighed, sitting back in his chair and finally letting go of that paper to fold his hands over his stomach.

"Alright, Miss Jones, you know as well as I do this wasn't a courtesy call. I'm sure Sergeant Luz told you how pissed off I was when I called him in here. And between you and me, I think this whole situation is uncalled for.

"What you're really in here for is that God dammed piece of paper right there," he said and jabbed the object with his pointer finger as if it had personally offended him. I stared at the paper, hoping despite my better judgment that it wasn't what I thought it was.

"And what is the paper about, sir?" It was embarrassing that my voice inflected with emotion, unshed tears rising in my eyes. This was it.

"Apparently the British want all of their medical personnel back in England to help out with all the wounded soldiers coming home," Sink sighed. He gazed at me for half a heartbeat before leaning forward and taking my hand. I gasped softly. I'd never imagined that Sink was possible of such a comforting gesture.

"Adelina, I don't want this anymore than you do. I've been on the phone all day with General Taylor, Colonel Dobey, and any other officer I can get a hold of. But none of them will budge. There's nothing I can do." I nodded, wiping away the tears that were clinking to my eyelashes. It was like I was being torn in half. My heart ached, my body trembled with emotions too horrible to feel.

"I understand, Colonel. T-thank you for trying," I said, the sound of my voice not growing louder than a whisper between us. Sink squeezed my hand once, then let me go, sensing that I wanted to leave.

"You'll be leaving in two days, Miss Jones. 0600 hours," Colonel Sink told me as I stood up. His tone was back to its usual businesslike quality. I would have laughed if I didn't feel like I was being ripped apart at the seams.

"Yes, sir," I said, saluting him and then turning around when he returned the gesture. I crossed the room, my legs moving as quickly as they dared and flung open the door. Feeling the need to run as fast and as far away from this building as possible, I rushed down the hallway, not bothering to stop at the front desk, when my hand closed around the handle of the door. I barged through it, my shoulders already shaking from the weight of reality falling suddenly on my shoulders.

Why did it have to be this way? I'd known all along that I would have to leave Ron. But why now? I wasn't ready to let him go. I wasn't ready to accept that I would have to spend the rest of my life without him. Besides that, I had no idea how I was going to break it to him. Shaking my head, I decided that now was not the time to think about it. Not here in the middle of the street, with so many pairs of eyes upon me.

***

My hands were moving, but I wasn't really focusing on what I was doing. I was leaving in the morning and I still hadn't told anyone. Not even Dick. I knew how much it would hurt to know that I was walking away from the best thing in my life: Easy Company. And I couldn't bear the thought of anyone's expression when I told them I had to leave.

Of course, as selfish as it was, the only person I really cared about telling was the one person I had absolutely refused to see.

_Ron._

His name sent a shiver of sorrow through to my soul. Tears did not leak from my eyes as I expected. I'd become too numb for any show of emotion. It was the only way I could deal with the pain.

A chorus of voices along with the pounding on the door startled me from my thoughts.

"Adie! Open up!" I rushed to the door, terrified of the voice that rang through the door. It was Ron. For the first time in my waking memory, he sounded petrified. There was a doctor on hand. But he was in the back. I called his name before closing the distance between my body and the door. When I pulled it open, I never expected to see Ron and Talbert carrying a stretcher between them. Or Roe to be next to that stretcher, holding up a bag of plasma. My head was spinning at the sight of the patient.

"Grant?" I muttered, stepping aside, trying to fathom the fact that my emotional floodgates had been opened. An intense sadness filled me as I watched the men pour into the aid station and set the stretcher on an empty bed.

"Johnson!" I yelled again, even as his face poked around the door of the supply closet, "we've got a big problem out here." Confusion filled his eyes and he came as fast as he could toward us. I turned my eyes to Grant, the way Ron was holding his hand brought fresh tears to my eyes. Roe noticed me and he gave me a comforting smile. But behind his eyes, I could see the worry and doubt he was trying to hide from me.

Doctor Johnson turned on the light beside the bed and bent down to examine the wound. He lifted up the bandage around his head and I could see that whoever had shot him had gotten him good. A chill ran up my spine as anger flared within me. I hoped whoever had done this was in for a long night of brutal beatings.

"Jesus Christ," Johnson muttered, his fingers sliding the bandage back in place as he stood up straight.

"What?" Ron asked, his voice quiet and filled with emotion.

"He's not going to make it." I flinched, denial setting in. there had to be someone who could help Grant.

"You can't help him?"

"Not me. You'd need a brain surgeon." With that, Johnson rubbed his fingers along his jaw, a regretful and sympathetic expression on his face that didn't quite meet his eyes. Ron glanced over his shoulder at me, looking at me for the first time. He looked back at Grant, a sigh passing his lips.

"We've got to do something," he said quietly then grabbing his end of the stretcher. He pointed at Talbert, a determined look flaring to life within him. It glowed like an aura around him, making me smile despite the situation.

"Find the shooter. We're going to find him a brain surgeon." As they started off, I looked from Ron to Johnson, wondering if I should take a chance at going with them. Making up my mind, I turned on my heel and jogged after them. Outside the aid station, I found Ron getting in the driver's seat of a jeep. He looked over his shoulder at me and shook his head.

"Adie, honey, I need you to stay here," he called, finally settling in his seat. I continued forward, shaking my head gently. When I was level with him, I grabbed his hand, preventing him from going anywhere unless he wanted to hurt me.

"You think I'm going to stay here and do nothing while you get to rove the country side? I don't think so," I said, staring adamantly between Speirs and Roe. They looked for a moment at each other and finally, Speirs threw his hands into the air. I'd think he was mad at me if not for the smirk that curled his lips to the sky.

"Hurry up," he said. I smiled swiftly and then climbed onto the back of the jeep. I grabbed Grant's hand immediately and squeezed it.

"Don't you worry, Grant. We're going to find you the best brain surgeon in the country and you'll be alright," I told him quietly, knowing in my heart that he couldn't hear. I gulped down the emotions rising within me: fear, disbelief, and most of all anger. I would have reacted this way with any of the men from Easy. They were good men who'd been through hell and back and then that disgrace of a man, who'd probably had too much alcohol and too much time on his hands, had shot him. I bit back the tears that threatened to spill onto my cheeks. I fidgeted with a loose string on Grant's jacket to pass the time.

Finally, Ron pulled up beside a house. He hopped off the jeep and I watched him approach the door of a very well-respected Kraut surgeon. He pulled a pistol from it's holster and tapped the door with his free hand. He knocked until someone answered the door. In the darkness, I saw a man move the curtains aside and look out at us.

"Open up," Ron said as he tapped the pistol against the glass panes. Hurriedly, the German man did as he was told and Speirs pushed the door open even wider in his haste. He hesitated for a moment, as if he were about to grab him.

"Come with us."

"Why?" the doctor asked, scared and confused as to why we were here. I could see that Ron was visibly becoming more and more frustrated. I could understand. We were running out of time. I threaded my fingers through Grant's, unable to face the dark reality of what may or may not happen to our friend.

"Get in the jeep," Ron ordered, looking at the man and then at the vehicle as if to make his command more clear. The man's eyes darted toward where Roe and I were sitting with Grant. Something shifted in those dark orbs as he decided to reluctantly acquiesce. He grabbed his coat and strode toward the jeep.

"Where are we going."

"The hospital," came the reply. While the German had his back turned, Ron pointed the pistol at him. I could see that even though he was very well versed in the act of keeping his emotions in check, he was still very much unsure of this man. I could see that he was also desperate to get Grant looked after. His eyes moved to mine for a moment, and I found that I couldn't look at him. I saw my own fear reflected back at me. The German turned around again.

"If you're not going to shoot me, put the gun away." The man's hands were lifted toward him as a sign of surrender and peace. Ron, blind to anything but Grant's wound, jerked the pistol toward the German again to emphasize his point.

"Get in the jeep, now," he repeated. His jaw clenched. A fire flashed in his eyes, and I knew he was serious. Instead of doing as he'd asked, the doctor turned to Roe and I.

"What happened to him?" he asked us, his eyes shifting from Grant to us and back. I opened my mouth as if to speak, but closed it again when I realized I could not. Roe, thankfully, took the reins.

"Shot in the head," he answered. I nodded and looked down at the blood-soaked bandage Roe and I had only just managed to place on his head.

"A half hour ago," Ron told him. My eyes started to tear up again. Terror gripped my heart. Suddenly, I wanted to scream. The situation seemed so beyond any of us. I was flailing madly in a place where I had no control. I held tighter still to Grant's hand. It was warm and managed to anchor me down so that I could focus again. His impatience growing even more, Ron tapped the doctor on the arm with his pistol.

"Come on," he urged.

"If you want him to live, then you'll help me. First, by putting that away," he stared pointedly at the gun. Ron's jaw clenched yet again and he placed it hastily into it's holster. He made to get into the driver's seat, but the German doctor stopped him with his hand.

"Let me drive," he said, "We'll get there faster." Ron's eyes darted to mine. I looked at him, my lip trembling.

"Ron, please," I whispered. He nodded in acceptance and raced around to the other side. He jumped in and the German sped off in what I assumed was the direction of the nearest hospital. I looked back down at Grant and gasped when I felt my other hand being grabbed up. I looked at Roe expectantly, but saw that Speirs had taken it into his own. My heart lurched and my stomach filled with knots. My pulse was boiling. After telling myself that I wouldn't touch him again, it was completely unexpected. He did not turn around to look at me, but he would squeeze my fingers every few minutes. I couldn't help the small smile that crept onto my lips. I knew this was going to make leaving him harder. Still, I would take whatever contact I could get.

After the moment's melted into minutes and the minutes stretched into what felt like eternity, the doctor hit the brakes and stopped right outside of a two-story, white building. It was immaculately clean, and though it was small, I felt like it was most likely one of the best hospitals in Austria. I jumped off the back of the vehicle at once and moved out of their way. Ron grabbed one end of the stretcher while Roe clung to the other. The German doctor led them into the building and I was left by the jeep, my feet refusing to move. I stood there, shivering in the cold, waiting for someone to come and tell me what had happened. I knew it was weak to wait out here, but I couldn't possibly go in there. It was only one soldier, but to me, it felt like a member of my family had been shot. All of the men of Easy were the world to me and I wouldn't be able to stand it if one of them was killed this close to being finished with the war. Feeling beyond helpless, I sank suddenly to the ground. Tears poured from my eyes and when Roe came out to me, I was barely aware of him. After a few attempts of trying to talk to me, I felt his warmth disappear. Another presence entered my line of sight and I only just managed to turn my eyes toward them.

"Adelina?" came Ron's voice, low and quiet in my ear. I blinked and continued to stare at him. He turned his head to Roe, who was watching us with a very worried expression on his face.

"Eugene, stay here with Grant. Make sure that Kraut doctor doesn't kill him," he ordered. Without another word, Roe turned and ran up the steps. He sighed and looked at me again.

"Adie, baby, talk to me." His fingertips grazed my cheek, wiping some of the tears away. My eyes closed and I leaned into his touch. The heat exuding from his core surrounded me as he inched closer. His arms slipped under me and he hauled me skyward. My head fell onto his shoulder and his scent filled my nostrils. It was comforting and I knew that if I wanted anything, I wanted to be with him for one more night. I breathed him in, attempting to calm myself. He walked around the side of the truck and placed me in the passenger seat. He made sure I was secure before jogging to the other side and climbing into the driver's seat. He turned the key in the ignition and turned the jeep around so that we were driving back out of town. I stared at the hills rolling by as we flew past acre after acre. My eyes wandered back toward him. His jaw was relaxed now that he was sure something was being done about Grant. His eyes stayed focused on the road, but somehow, I knew that he was as aware of me as I was of him. My heart was pounding, my pulse jumping into my throat with every beat. I gulped, my eyes searching his face for a long moment.

"What is it?" he asked me, diligently keeping his focus on the road. I blushed, surprised that he could still get such a reaction from me after all we had been through. I gazed everywhere and anywhere but at his piercing stare, my eyes finally settling on his hand. It was lying dormant between our seats and I couldn't help the tremors of desire that wracked through me at the thought of what he could do with that hand.

"It's nothing," I said, my own fingers shaking at the thought of holding his. He didn't give me time to think. He took hold of my left hand and let them fall together in between the seats. I stared at him, shocked into silence.

"The doctor said he was going to make it," he told me suddenly. His voice was so quiet that I almost believed that I'd imagined it. However, he squeezed my hand comfortingly. I gasped as fresh tears filled my eyes.

"That's wonderful!" I whispered. I brushed the tears away with my free hand. When I looked back at Ron, he was frowning and seemed to be deep in concentration. His grip on my hand increased, as if he was trying to draw strength from the warmth of my body. For the first time, I looked around us and realized that we were very close to our destination: a building in the middle of town where I somehow knew the perpetrator had been stowed away. My heart began to race, and I realized that the shooter was most likely being beaten as we spoke. I couldn't help the sick sense of satisfaction that raced up my spine. He slowed down and finally stopped in front of the building. He got out and came around to my side. Without a word, he held out his hand and helped me down. He kept our fingers entwined until we'd entered the main hallway. He turned to me, his eyes intense and filled with anger.

"Whatever you hear, do not come through those doors," he told me, pointing toward the glass doors through which I could see Talbert and Luz playing cards. I wondered how they did it when only feet away was a man who'd nearly killed one of their fellow paratroopers over nothing. I nodded and sunk into a chair where I could not see anything.

"Where is he?" I heard Ron ask Luz and Talbert. One of them said something that I could not hear. He repeated the question. Again, one of the men replied. It was obviously not what he wanted to hear.

"Where is he?!" he shouted. The anger and frustration was evident in his voice. When he retreated into another room, I knew that he'd finally been told. I closed my eyes, feeling my heart beating frantically in my chest. I waited for a long time, it seemed. No guns were fired. I closed my eyes tighter, expecting the shots and screaming to fill my ears at any given moment. I was so focused that when I felt a warm hand cup my cheek I jumped out of the chair and onto my feet.

"Adie?" My eyes opened and I found my face only inches away from Ron's. He grabbed my hand and wordlessly led me outside. I didn't know where we were going, nor did I care. All that mattered at the moment was that we were together. I would deal with the complications in the morning. But right now...I wanted him more than anything.

"Ron..." I trailed off, my voice too weak for me to speak.

"I didn't shoot him if that's what you're wondering," he explained. My footsteps receded into the night's silence. I looked up at him, my heart beating like a bird's wings against my chest. I squeezed his hand, biting my lip to keep a smile from curling my lips.

"I knew you wouldn't," I said, quietly. I felt him lean into me, his face only inches away from me. He bent his head enough so that his lips brushed my ear.

"Adie, will you stay with me tonight? I need to feel you naked against me. I have to wash the image of that filth from my mind." Ron's husky voice raised goosebumps along my arms and caused me to shudder uncontrollably. A moan rushed through my lips, my fingers grasping through the air until they met the front of his uniform. Liquid fire was melting its way through my veins, filling my head with a desire for his body so intense that I knew I wouldn't last very long when he could get me alone.

"Of course I'll stay with you," I said softly, tracing the outline of his neck with the tips of my fingers. The guttural moan that fell from his lips twisted on those things low on my body. Fire danced along my skin, shedding light on my current situation. This was the last night I would ever spend with him and I knew that I had to make it last. This night was what would get me through the rest of my lifetime.

With a silent sigh, I gripped his hand with my own.

"Your room or mine?" I asked him, my voice so husky it was nearly unrecognizable. In answer, Ron took the lead down the road. With the shuffling of our feet the only noise filling the air, I let myself be consumed by the feeling of his strong hand around mine and the tightly coiled desire that was throbbing through my mind. It was so strong a feeling I was sure that I would never make it to his room. It was incapacitating. My knees and my arms shook with it. As the heat danced through me, I couldn't help but consider what this might be do to me-to Ron. Was this right? Was this going to make things any easier for us? Probably not, but I knew that I had to have him tonight one last time. And I knew that in the end, it would only be me who suffered. Ron had a wife and a child now. He would get over me, he would live on in blissful ignorance of the pain I knew was promised to me in my future.

Finally, we were at his door. He turned the doorknob, pulling me inside before I could second-guess my decision. The jolt of electricity shot through me when he pushed me against that door and assaulted my lips with a fervor I hadn't known possible. His hands were everywhere. Caressing my breasts through the thick material of my jacket, running down the curves of my neck, skimming my thighs and hips. I felt breathless when he pulled away, but I rushed forward to meet him when I gasped a quick breath.

"Ron, I need you," I whispered in the void between our feverish skin before closing the distance between our quivering lips again. The moan that wracked through his body with my words were swallowed by my mouth. It froze me in place, an endless moment of eternity passing before I finally had the strength to pull away from him.

"At this rate, we won't make it to the bed," he muttered, pressing his forehead into my shoulder. I chuckled, despite the fact that tears clung gently to my eyelashes. I shut my eyes, wishing that this night would never end. Hoping that tomorrow I would wake up and I would not have to leave him. A single droplet slipped beneath my eyelids and slid down my cheek. Before I could stop it, it fell from my face. I prayed that it had missed his body. I prayed that it fell to the floor, unnoticed and unspoken of as long as we lived. However, when he pulled sharply away from me and cupped my cheeks, I knew my hopes had been in vain.

"Baby, what's wrong?" he asked, his voice so heartrendingly beautiful that I felt the need to collapse to the floor. My knees wobbled weakly beneath me, threatening to give out with each passing second.

"Adie, talk to me dammit!" Ron said, anger rising in his voice.

_Maybe making him angry would be easier in the long run. Make him hurt you instead of taking you to bed. It will make things so much simpler for you. _

When the small voice in my ear muttered these blasphemous words, I didn't want to make sense of them. As irrational as it sounded, I didn't want to believe that the voice was being honest. The thought of leaving him now would be like ripping out my heart and watching myself bleed to death. Painful beyond all imagining and utterly impossible to carry out.

But slowly, as his fingers moved from my cheeks to my arms, I knew that was exactly what I had to do. So, I did the only thing I could do. I pushed him away from me, though the action was weak.

"Ron, I can't do this. Not tonight," I whispered, my hands shaking as his warmth left me.

"What?" I opened my eyes to meet his gaze. His eyes had darkened and not from lust. His anger was rising, his temper taking hold of the reason left in him.

"Ron, I just....I can't sleep with you tonight. I'm sorry," I told him, straightening with the last shred of dignity I could muster. I stared him straight in the eye, feeling myself breaking apart at the look on his face. There was anger, but there was something else there that I couldn't-wouldn't-acknowledge. And before my eyes he transformed into the cold-hearted man that I'd known was a part of him from the beginning.

"Why not?"

"Because, I-I just can't do this."

"I told you I needed you," he said, and his tone was almost pleading. It stole my breath, making me want more than anything to take back all that I had said. But I knew I couldn't.

"Ron, how long are we going to keep doing this to ourselves?" I asked him, quietly, unable to meet his dark eyes. The surprise that rose in his eyes was evident as I leaned forward, tracing his tensed jaw with my fingertips. The action made his eyelids fall over his black orbs.

"What are you talking about?" His voice was hoarse, as if he had a hard time getting the words out.

"We can't keep pretending that we have forever, Ron. You're going back to your wife and I'll-," I hoped he couldn't hear the tears in my voice. I shook my head to clear it, "I'll go back to England and start looking to make a family of my own." At my words, his eyes snapped open. He glared down at me with a mixture of shock and tepid disbelief.

"I've told you I'm not going back to her. I want you, Adie but you still don't believe me do you?" The hurt in his expression was unmistakable and I had to bite my lip from not reassuring him. This was going to be harder than I'd thought at first.

"Ron, it sounds wonderful when you say that, but we both know that it's not just her you'll be leaving," I said, the tears suddenly falling from my eyes, leaving a heated trail on my cheek, "What about the baby? _Your _baby?"

"He has nothing to do with it," Ron rebuked spitefully, but I could see the doubt now filling his eyes. I stood there before him, silent as I watched the emotions play along his face. We were still standing so close that I could feel the trembling of his body. He ran a shaking hand through his hair and groaned.

"Goddammit!" he muttered darkly, glaring at the wall above my head. Shards of my broken heart floated to the surface, scraping against my throat to allow a strangled cry to fall from my lips.

"I'm sorry, Ron. I h-have to go," I said, turning around and placing my fingers on the door handle. For a moment, I thought he would let me leave. But his hand landed with a loud thud on the door, preventing me from opening it. I didn't have the strength to look at him. My hands settled between my chest and the door, his body hanging like a heavy weight behind me.

"You're sorry?" he repeated with a dark chuckle, "You're sorry?!" He yelled the last part, making me flinch away from him. He ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath that sounded more like a growl. Then in the silence, something settled between us. Something dark and dangerous. Something I could feel was crawling along my skin and setting me on fire.

"Adie," he whispered huskily before I felt his lips suddenly on the dip of my shoulder. I shuddered beneath him, wishing we had more time. My head fell to the side, granting him more access. I was nearly undone when he pressed his body to mine. His arousal was evident and I wanted nothing more than to let him take me. And for one last moment, I let him take me to that erotic place filled with breathy moans and endless sighs of ecstasy. Then, I ducked from his grasp and opened the door before he could catch me. I ran away from him as fast as I could, my legs pounding beneath me like a second heartbeat. I dared not look back, deathly afraid that the expression on his face would bring me to my knees, breaking my already shaken resolve to leave him like this.

When I saw my door in front of me, I threw my body forward. Urging me onward, I knew the key to my release was behind that thick slab of wood. My fingers closed around the cold handle and I opened the door without hesitation. Shutting it behind me, I slid to the floor, my knees no longer strong enough to hold me. I concentrated hard and long on the sharp gasps that echoed through the room, trying to push the pain away. But, as the tears began to drop into my lap, I knew I had failed.

"Oh God. What have I done?" I whispered into the darkness of the room.

I don't know how long I stayed there like that. Staring into the black abyss of my room, the pain consuming me until I was nothing but a raw, aching body condemned to endless torture. Finally, I found the strength to drag myself off the floor and turn on the light. I checked my watch with red eyes, welcoming the numbing feeling that was slowly spreading through my limbs.

"Five o'clock," I said, amazed that so much time had passed. I was leaving in an hour and there was one last thing I knew I had to do. I sat down at the desk in the corner, the typewriter sitting as bold as brass before me. I stared at it, thinking about what I wanted to say before I began to type.

Then, I placed my fingertips on the keys and began to type. I placed my heart and soul on that letter, knowing that this was exactly what I needed to disappear from Ron's life forever. When I was done, I folded it and put it in an envelope, writing Ron's name on the front. I gathered the bags I was taking into my arms, making sure I had the letter in my hand before walking out of the door.

I focused on the chilly air clinging like a second jacket to my body to keep the pain from penetrating what was left of my heart. I turned my eyes down to the ground, watching my every step. I didn't notice that I was being watched from afar by two icy blue eyes.

"Adie?!" Dick's voice filled the night and froze my legs. I turned gently to see him jogging over to me. I tried to send him a smile, but I knew by the look on his face that I hadn't quite managed it.

"Hi, Dick," I muttered, terrified that the tears would start again. I didn't even think it was possible for me to cry anymore. I just felt numb all over and as horrible as it was, letting myself feel was even worse.

"I didn't think you were really leaving," Dick said, reaching out and taking my bags from my hands. His fingers brushed softly against mine, a silent reassurance that things would be easier eventually. I couldn't make myself believe that it was true.

"Yeah, in about fifteen minutes," I said. I turned awkwardly, heading toward Regiment. In the distance, I could see the bulky outline of an Army jeep. I knew that was my destination and even though I could feel that dull throbbing somewhere in my chest, I didn't acknowledge it. To do so would have undone what was left of my sanity.

"Adie, you okay?" Dick asked me. I turned my head just so to look up at him. His face was a carefully reserved mask, but I knew better. There was a flicker in his eyes that showed me exactly what he was feeling. I slipped my arm around his. The warmth of his body spread through me and I smiled slightly, the action now more natural on my lips.

"No, Dick, but I do feel a little better having you here. I didn't want to leave without telling you goodbye," I told him quietly. We were level with the jeep now. The Sergeant who was sitting in the seat took one look at us before turning his head the other way. I suppressed a giggle, watching Dick throw my bags in the back.

"Thank you." Dick glanced down at me for a moment, his mask breaking when he saw me. With only slight hesitation, his arms closed the distance between us and pulled me toward his body.

"I'll miss you, Adie," he whispered, laying a kiss on the top of my head. I nodded, my fingers tightening on the front of his uniform. I had to push the pain to the back of my mind to stop myself from crying. I pulled away before I was really ready, but I knew that some distance had to be placed between us before I did something that would make this even harder. I reached into my pocket and grabbed the letter. I pulled it out, looking at it for a long minute.

"Dick, could you-could you give this to Ron?" I asked him, holding the envelope out in front of me. Without looking at me, Dick took the letter from me, nodding as he did so.

"Of course I will." He stuck what was left of my soul into his pocket, a slight smile playing on his lips. I turned my eyes skyward before turning around and climbing awkwardly into the passenger seat of the jeep.

A moment later, I heard a door slam and Sink appeared on the other side of the vehicle. He leaned around the Sergeant to look at me.

"All ready, Miss Jones?" I thought on the question, finally deciding that _no _was not the answer he was looking for. So, I nodded my head, folding my hands in my lap to keep them from shaking. Numbness was still wrapped around my body, keeping me from feeling much of anything. But the dull ache in my chest flared as I leaned over to place a tender kiss on Dick's cheek.

"Write me, Dick," I whispered before Sink gave the signal for the Sergeant to drive away. Not once did I look back because I knew that when I did, I would concede control of what was left of me. I would break completely, knowing that my world had fallen apart in a single night.

**Alrighty, this is the last official chapter as I've told most of the people who have reviewed for chapter 34. I haven't looked this one over, but I don't think there are any major problems with it. So if there are, please please please tell me so that I can fix it. :)**

**And I know this isn't goodbye quite yet for this one, but I just want to tell you guys how much I appreciate every single one of you for reading this story. And a HUGE HUGE HUGE thank you to my unofficial beta captain ty. You are seriously my biggest inspiration with all your amazing Speirs writing. Without you, this story never would have made it this far. And also a HUGE thank you to everyone who has ever provided feedback. Expect a wonderful thank you in the epilogue, because I'm kind of in a rush to get this one out. Okay, happy reading and I'll talk to you all again on Sunday(that's when I'll post the epilogue). :)**


	37. Epilogue

_I found a reason for me_

_To change who I used to be_

_A reason to start over new_

_And the reason is you _

_I'm sorry that I hurt you _

_~"The Reason" by Hoobastank_

_November 1945_

Speirs' POV

_My dearest Ron,_

_I know that you must be beyond furious with me, but I wrote this for you on the blind hope that despite your anger, you would read it eventually. I don't know exactly how to start this. So, I guess the only thing to do is to be straightforward. _

_I don't know how to put into words how much I love you. It's almost like I'd only been half alive and you awakened feelings in me that I never thought possible. And if you knew just how strongly I feel about you, then you would know that leaving you is and always will remain the hardest thing I have ever and will ever do in my life. _

_I wish I could be there with you now to tell you these things. Wrapped in your warm embrace, letting your fingers trace the curves of my body. But I can't. I wish I could see the look on your face when you first see your son. I wish that we could have grown old together and spent our lives getting to know each other. _

_I think, though, that our romance was doomed from the beginning. A warm bed wasn't enough for me. It should never have been enough but part of me wanted to believe that something was better than nothing. But that's not what I wanted from you. I wanted all of you. I wanted you to be my husband and I wanted to have children with you. But the fact that you are married always got in the way. Not to mention the baby. He changed everything, as only children can do. I realized then that I wouldn't have you. _

_So I wrote this to say goodbye, but it turned into a long list of what can never be between us. For that I am sorry, but I don't think I told you enough how much you meant to me. I guess the saying you never know what you have until it's gone applies to us. That's all I had to say. I hope that someday, somehow you can forgive me. _

_I will always love you,_

_Adelina_

My fingers were curled tightly around the letter, now worn because I'd read it over and over and over again since Dick had handed it to me. I stared out the window of the train, adamant that I would not look at the letter again. I didn't want to see it, to feel the flames of pain engulf me within their depths and burn away everything. Everything but a raw, aching need to have her in my arms again.

I tried to focus instead on where the train was taking me. Back to my wife and a son I had not met yet. I should be happy, but I wasn't. I couldn't stop the shiver that ran down my spine. My wife. My son. I didn't feel like a married man or a father. I didn't feel like myself. Because I wanted more than anything to be someone else. I wanted to be with Adie. Her husband. The father of her children. I knew it was never to be. The weight of this realization clung to me like a second skin, covering every inch of my body from head to toe. My thoughts strayed once again to the letter still clenched in my fist. As much as I wanted to push it out of my mind, I knew that it would haunt me for the rest of my life. It was the only thing I had of her, the only reminder that what we'd had was real. That she was real.

_I don't know how to put into words how much I love you. It's almost like I'd only been half alive and you awakened feelings in me that I never thought possible. And if you knew just how strongly I feel about you, then you would know that leaving you is and always will remain the hardest thing I have ever and will ever have to do in my life._

If she only knew how strongly _I _felt about _her_...Would she have left? I closed my eyes, trying not to think about it. I knew it was no use. I could see her everywhere I looked. I suppressed a growl, guessing that the old man sitting in the seat across from me would not have appreciated it. I let out a low sigh instead, feeling like it would be more appropriate.

I turned my attention outside the window again, watching the last of the sun's dying rays touch the Earth. The sunset held no more beauty for me. Of course, when I compared it to Adie, nothing would ever be beautiful to me again.

Oh how wrong I would turn out to be.

***

A light tapping on my shoulder woke me from the sleep I had succumbed to. My heart was pounding against my chest as the words from her letter still clung desperately to my mind, trying to pull me back to unconsciousness. Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn't I have met Adelina before I'd married my wife? The what ifs and maybes of my life seemed to settle around me, weighing me down until I felt like I would drown with the force of the doubts plaguing my mind.

"Son, are you alright?" an unfamiliar voice floated down to me, turning my face upward. I gazed into the brown, watery gaze of the old man who had been sitting across from me. I could see the hesitant concern for my lack of attentiveness, but I could see something else there. Understanding.

"I-," I cleared my throat, my voice still husky from sleep, "I'm fine, thank you." For another moment, we stared at each other. He seemed to have the knowledge of the world in his old eyes, and it terrified me. That it was that painfully obvious what I was going through. When he clapped me softly on the shoulder, I knew that he wanted to comfort me.

"It's alright, son. Whoever she is, she'll come around if it's meant to be," he said. And just like that, he turned around and left me alone. I thought about his words, wondering if I could bring myself to believe it.

"_We can't keep pretending that we have forever, Ron..." _

Adie was right. We hadn't had forever and as much as I wanted to believe that somehow, she would find her way back into my life, I didn't want to sign myself up for a life full of disappointment. I sighed, running my fingers through my hair once before standing up and collecting my bags. I turned my focus to the task now at hand: getting off the platform and making my way home.

It didn't take long to make my way from the train station through the streets of Aldbourne. The small town was bustling with life. All around me, happy wives and children were walking around with their soldiers who were just now arriving home. They were all smiles and it made me sick to my stomach to think that could be me. I shook my head, determined to keep Adie out of my head for at least a night.

When I arrived on that familiar door step, my heart was pounding. For some reason I did not understand, I did not want to take the one last step back into my life. Was it because of the little boy waiting behind that thick slab of wood? What was I afraid of? I shook myself mentally, reaching forward before I could change my mind through the air that was now as thick as honey, and I grasped the doorknob in my left hand. I twisted it, the door swinging wide for me to enter the house. _My _house.

I couldn't help the sigh that wound its way up my chest. As much as I didn't want to be here, as much as I wanted to be with _her_, it was nice to be somewhere familiar, somewhere safe.

"Maria?" I shouted, hoping that I wouldn't wake the baby. Funny that I didn't even know his name yet. But, as the cry rang through the house, I cringed.

"Damn," I muttered, before dropping my bags and rushing towards the source of the noise. In some ways, this was a moment I knew I would never forget. It made my heart swell with an emotion I could only describe as pride. But in other ways, the part of me that was still desperately clinging to the last dregs of hope that Adie and I could be together, wished that I could have avoided this all together. Hearing about this baby, my son, was a very different thing from actually seeing him. But when I saw him in his crib, I nearly cried out as happiness bubbled in my chest. He was small, so small that I was afraid that if I were to touch him I would break him. His tiny fists flailed through the air as he tried to grasp some sense of familiarity in this new world. The black hair that covered the top of his head was soft to the touch. When I ran my hand along it, he quieted down some, only soft whines falling from his pink lips. I smiled to myself. Somehow, looking at him shifted things into perspective. I'd lost the woman I loved, but I had gained a son in return. The future suddenly did not seem so bleak.

"His name's Thomas," a familiar, yet entirely unexpected, voice said from behind me. I whipped around, my hand shifting from my son's head to the edge of the crib. I stared at my old friend, not wanting to believe that he was really standing here in my living room.

"What in the hell are you doing here?" I asked him, my voice menacing as it dropped down to a low growl. The surprise in his eyes was evident. His mouth dropped open slightly as he heard the tone in my voice.

"I would have thought you of all people would have reacted differently on seeing me, Ron. I guess I was thoroughly mistaken," John said, his lips forming a forlorn smile. I wanted to jump across the distance between us and throttle him. I wanted to kill him, watch the life leave his eyes as I crushed his neck. I was surprised by the passion behind my thoughts, but I finally had someone to peg all my current problems on. He was the reason I'd married Maria. He was the reason I couldn't be with the one woman I'd never wanted more in my entire life. And suddenly here he was, the key to my freedom. Only I hadn't quite realized it yet.

"You haven't answered my question, John." He watched me, a sliver of anger lighting up in his eyes. He took a step toward me, his expression twisting and morphing until there was nothing there but pure and unadulterated fury.

"I'm here because my wife is here. We've been waiting for you to come back for a long time. And now that you're here, there's some things we need to discuss," John said, the barely contained anger making his entire frame shake in its presence. Instead of answering him, I turned around and glanced down at my son. He had taken my thumb into his hand and was gripping it firmly. His small chest rose upward and then fell downward with every breath he took. I couldn't help the smirk that twisted my lips.

"What things do we need to discuss exactly?" I asked as I turned back to look at him. Maria was standing at the top of the stairs now, her hands tightening the robe wrapped around her body, an evil smirk playing on her face. I knew by my very soul that whatever the two of them had cooked up could only mean bad news for me and the tiny human being laying in the crib next to me.

_December 1947_

Adelina's POV

_One foot in front of the other._

I continued the mantra in my head until finally I was out of the hospital. The chilling December air whipped through my hair and bit at every inch of bare skin that it could find. I shuddered uncontrollably, my mind taking over as I watched the small snowflakes twisting in the wind and floating endlessly to the ground.

Two years. Nearly twenty-four months since I had seen Ron. Almost 730 days since I had seen anyone from Easy. Dick and Lew had both called a few times. Bill had written me a few letters as well. But as time wore on and a cocoon of despair and pain wrapped around me, the phone conversations got shorter as did the replies to my letters. Until finally, there was nothing less. Everyone seemed to be moving on with their lives except for me. Where was my happy ending?

I knew where it was. And I knew that with every passing day, that happy ending seemed to grow farther and farther away. It was a wonder I could even still see it, still dare to hope that it was still within my grasp.

Pain ripped through me as my thoughts flitted unwanted to his face. The curve of his jaw when he smiled, the feelings those dark orbs could create in me, the dark facial hair that had graced his cheeks when I left...all of those things seemed inconsequential to me. Because I couldn't have them. I would never have them again and the thought threatened to destroy what sliver of sanity I still held whenever I thought about it.

I wandered absentmindedly through the streets of the sleepy town just outside of London, wandering slowly toward my destination. I needed to buy a few things at the super market before going home to make a dinner for myself. I could almost laugh at the pathetic turn my life had taken on. Part of me missed the days when I hadn't needed a man to make me happy. But that was before Ron, and I knew that no amount of wishing would ever undo the permanent change loving him had caused in me.

"Ello there, Miss Jones, the usual today?" a fruit vendor by the name of Jeremy Sparks asked of me as I paused at his stand. I nodded my head, managing a small smile for him.

"Of course, Jeremy. And how are the wife and kids?" I asked him, my lips twitching upwards at the thought of his two children. They'd reminded me of just why I'd wanted kids. Little Harry was two years old and was full of energy and life. He'd talked to me for hours about everything and anything and when he'd learned that I'd been in the war, I'd become his new best friend. Annie, the older of the Sparks' children, was seven years old. While more reserved, she had eventually opened up to me. She was intelligent and had a good sense of humor even for a child. With her big blue eyes, she reminded me a lot of my little sister. I was happy to note that I had been able to look at her without tearing up once. Ron had helped me move on from my sister's death, yet another mark on how he had changed me. That day in Landsberg so long ago, holding me while I poured my heart and soul into my admissions about the last secret that I had withheld from him.

"They're doing just fine. Harry keeps asking me when we can visit," Jeremy said with a sly wink as he handed me my groceries. I chuckled at his son's eagerness.

"Well, you know you're always welcome at my house, Jeremy. And if you and Helen ever need a night to yourselves, you could always bring the children over. I think I could handle them for a few hours," I said lightly, feeling that familiar ache in my chest as I wondered when it would be time to have children of my own. It was hard now to picture myself with anyone but Ron, but life sometimes took you in unexpected directions.

"Well, you know, Helen was actually thinking about going out to dinner sometime this week. How would you feel about taking them on Wednesday or Thursday?" I grinned widely, my mouth muscles screaming silently in protest. It had been so long since I'd really smiled.

"I'd love to, Jeremy," I said, hugging the bag in my hand as he held my other hand to his lips.

"You are a gem, my dear," he said, kissing the back of my hand softly before releasing me.

"Oh, Jeremy," I giggled before walking a few steps backward, "I'll see you later this week then." He tipped his head gently to me before turning to his next customer. I shook my head, my heart feeling only slightly lighter as I walked away. As plans began to form in my head for what I would do with the children, something small yet firmly solid bumped into my leg. I started, my hand jumping to my chest in fright. I glanced down hurriedly, relaxing when I saw that it was only a little boy. I bent down, a slight smile on my face as I looked around for his mother.

"Easy there, are you o-," my voice faltered when the little boy looked up at me through thick eyelashes. I gasped when my gaze met his dark orbs. His black hair fell gently around his face, which looked remarkably like Ron's. My heart began to race in my chest and my blood boiled with recognition. I looked around again, searching the crowd fervently for any sign of him. I was sure that this child was Ron's. I didn't have time to remind myself that where Ron was, Maria was sure to be not far behind. Was I ready to confront the picture of them as one happy family while I was still wallowing in my own puddle of self-pity? I had no idea, but the thought never crossed my mind as I looked back down at the little boy.

"Daddy?" he asked, his voice so sweet and soft that it brought tears to my eyes. Feeling the need to touch him, I brushed his bangs gently out of his eyes. He smiled at me, his hand falling on top of mine to keep it on his cheek.

"We'll find your daddy. Don't you worry," I muttered, my voice thick with the tears that clung stubbornly to my eyelashes, "What's your name?"

"Thomas. But my daddy likes to call me his little pain in the ass," the little boy said in a voice so innocent that I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. For a moment, I thought I could control myself. But my teeth slipped from my lip and the giggles bubbled helplessly up my throat. As my laughter filled the air, I wondered at the fact that it felt so good. So natural. It had been too long since I'd laughed like this. My humor was short-lived.

"Adelina?" Ron's voice rang through the air and echoed through my ears to my very soul. My hands began to shake uncontrollably and I stood up slowly so that I wouldn't fall over. My entire body was shaking. In fear, in anticipation, in happiness. Yes, the main emotion was joy. It bubbled in my veins and filled me with a sense of euphoria that I had never before known. I turned around, Thomas' hand still clasped around mine.

"Look, daddy, I found a new friend," the little boy said with a giggle, unaware of the sudden tension stretching through the air. I stared at Ron, at how good he looked in his civilian clothes. I realized now that I'd never seen him in anything other than his Army-issued dress uniform and ODs. I smiled, knowing that I liked it a lot.

"I see that, buddy," Ron muttered, his dark eyes boring into mine intensely. My heart skipped a beat at what I saw there. It was the same look I'd seen in his eyes over two years ago. So he still felt the same way about me?

"Where's Maria?" I asked, wanting to dispel the disconcerting need to pull him to me and kiss him before I did something I would regret. Mentioning his wife was the only way I could think to do that. However, when a dark look passed over Ron's face, I regretted asking even though part of me was dancing for joy.

"We're not together anymore, Adie," he said, his eyes twinkling suddenly at the smile that managed to curve my lips to the sky. I breathed a sigh, the air going so deep into my lungs that I was surprised it didn't stay there forever. I started forward before I really knew what I was doing and clasped his hand.

"Oh, Ron," I whispered, my chest heaving as the sobs wracked through my body. The smile on his face made my head swim with joy. I never knew I could feel so happy. And to think that only a few minutes ago...I pushed the thought from my mind, hoping that finally we could be together.

"Adie?" Ron asked as he pulled me closer, my body flush against mine. The way his lips wrapped around my name made shudders of pleasure race up and down my spine. I pressed my face lightly into his body, my lips tracing the curve of his neck and shoulder.

"Hm?" I asked, my voice so soft I was surprised he heard me. He pulled me closer so that his mouth brushed the outside of my ear.

"Marry me?" he asked. A long moment passed between us. Eternity seemed to stretch into nothingness and then narrowed into a single word. As the love and desire coursed through me, I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. I leaned back enough to look into his eyes. My hand cupped his cheek, my thumb rubbing gently across the stubble forming there.

"Of course I will, Ron," I said, leaning forward again to kiss him. A tiny hand tugging on my jacket had me leaning backward again so that I could look down at Thomas.

"I want a kiss," he said, a serious look on his face. I chuckled, bent down, and picked him up in my arms. I caught the look on Ron's face then. There was something there that I had never seen before. Something I couldn't have identified even if I'd wanted to. And as I looked at him, our eyes met.

"I love you, Adie," he said, the words coursing through me and sending tendrils of liquid heat up and down my spine. His gaze held the promise of a long, happy life together. I knew it wouldn't always be easy. Nothing with Ronald Speirs ever was. What I did know was that despite all the obstacles, we had found our way back to each other. And that was all that mattered.

"I love you too, Ron."

**And that my faithful readers is the end. I wish I could have had something epic and dramatic, but I honestly think this ending fits the both of them better. **

**It's been a long haul guys and I think I have more than a few thank yous to dole out. First of all, a HUGE thank you again to captain ty, who forced me to write all those times when I thought I just might give up for good. I also wanted to thank Iloveboyswhosparkle. Even though she hasn't quite caught up with the story, I can't wait to see what she thinks of all the drama that she's been missing here in BoB. :)**

**I also wanted to thank everyone who has ever read this story. For those of you who have been here since that very first post: I absolutely love all of you. If not for all those hits, I probably wouldn't have continued. So really: thank you so so much. **

**And finally, my faithful reviewers. Now, I'm going to make up for the fact that I've been neglecting to directly mention the names of all the wonderful people who have been reviewing. If I could say something about each of you that I love and admire, but for the sake of not boring anyone, we'll all just have to make do with just your names. :)**

**Captain ty, Iloveboyswhosparkle, iHedge, AivieEnchanted, Sairahiniel, Dean's Leather Jacket, beccasmind, PaperHeart382, wild-in-spirit, jjbroadway, sezq, Kurai-Seirei-no-Hotaru, Kaida635, pirate-muffins-13, and finally Dancing in Red. You have all made my first project in BoB so enjoyable. And I hope my next story does just as well if not better. :)**


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